NC Bench
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Run: 2026-02-17-01KHMN87VR501RN0P53ZP6QSFC
Run Details
Model:
Ministral 8B
Test:
Bad Writing Habits
Scenario:
Thriller: chase through city streets
Duration:
9.7s
Cost:
$0.000275
Model input
System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4417" name="Tomás Herrera" aliases="Tommy, Tomás, Herrera" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Support"> <eyeColor>warm brown</eyeColor> <hair>short curly dark brown</hair> <height>5'10"</height> <age>29</age> <skinTone>olive skin</skinTone> <scar>scar running along his left forearm from a knife attack</scar> <medallion>Saint Christopher medallion around his neck</medallion> <birthplace>Seville, Spain</birthplace> <description>A former paramedic who provides off-the-books medical care for the clique.</description> <backstory>Born in Seville, Spain. He moved to London to work for the NHS but lost his license after administering unauthorized treatments to supernatural patients.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the thriller genre. A detective is pursuing a suspect through rain-soaked city streets at night. The chase takes them from the street level down into an underground market. The detective must decide whether to follow the suspect into unfamiliar and potentially dangerous territory. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.
Model response
Messages
Meta
AI
The rain came down in sheets, a relentless drumming that turned the cobblestones of Soho into a slick, treacherous mirror. Detective Harlow Quinn’s breath fogged in the cold air as she crouched behind a wrought-iron awning, her gloved fingers tightening around the grip of her sidearm. The neon glow of a faded *Raven’s Nest* sign pulsed above her like a dying heartbeat, casting jagged shadows across the wet pavement. She had lost the suspect at the corner of Wardour Street, but the scent of damp wool and something sharper—alcohol, maybe, or the metallic tang of old blood—had carried on the wind. He was close. Her boots splashed through a puddle as she moved, the soles of her shoes sucking against the slick surface. The rain blurred the outlines of the buildings, turning them into indistinct silhouettes. She adjusted the strap of her jacket, the
weight
of her pistol a familiar anchor. She had been chasing him for three hours now, ever since the call came in about a body dumped in an alley behind the *Nest*—a man with a scar like a crescent moon along his forearm. Tomás Herrera’s scar. Her jaw tightened. The clique. She didn’t know what they were yet, but she knew they were dangerous. And if this was Herrera, then she
was walking
into a nest of vipers. A movement caught her eye. A figure darted between two buildings, their coat flaring open just enough to reveal the
glint
of a knife at their hip. Quinn’s pulse spiked. She didn’t wait. She broke cover, sprinting across the street before the pedestrian light could turn red. The rain lashed her face, stinging her eyes, but she didn’t slow. The suspect was fast, but she was faster. She cornered him at the mouth of a narrow alley, her gun leveled. "Herrera," she said, her voice cutting through the downpour. "You’re under arrest." The man turned, his face half-hidden beneath the brim of a worn hat. His eyes—dark, assessing—locked onto hers. "Detective Quinn," he said, his voice smooth, accented. "I was hoping it would be you." She didn’t lower her weapon. "What’s going on here?" He chuckled, low and knowing. "You
really
don’t know, do you?" He tilted his head toward the entrance of the alley, where the ground sloped downward into darkness. "Or are you just playing dumb?" Quinn’s instincts screamed at her to pull back, to call for backup. But something in his tone, the way he looked past her like she was already a ghost, made her stomach twist. She had
seen that look
before—on the faces of men who knew things they weren’t supposed to. "Where are you taking me?" she asked, her voice steady despite the unease coiling in her gut. Herrera didn’t answer. Instead, he reached into his coat and tossed something onto the pavement. A white bone token, small and smooth,
glint
ed in the dim light. "Follow me," he said, "and you’ll see." Quinn hesitated. The token was familiar—she had heard rumors of it, of a market that only the initiated could enter. She had dismissed them as superstition until now. But the way Herrera
was looking
at her, like he already knew her secrets, made her skin prickle. She holstered her pistol and stepped forward. "Fine. But I’m not going quietly." Herrera smirked. "No one ever does." The alley opened into a set of crumbling stone stairs, the steps slick with moisture. The air grew heavier as they descended, the scent of damp earth and something older, something metallic, filling her lungs. The stairs led down into darkness, the only light coming from a faint, eerie glow ahead. Quinn’s flashlight cut through the gloom as she followed Herrera down. The walls
were lined
with rusted pipes and peeling paint, the remnants of a long-forgotten Tube station. The glow grew brighter, revealing a cavernous space ahead—a market,
really
, but not like any market she had ever seen. Stalls lined the walls, draped in tattered
velvet
and flickering lanterns. The air hummed with the murmur of voices, the clink of glass, the occasional laugh that didn’t quite sound human. Quinn’s breath came faster. This was no ordinary black market. The goods on display were strange—vials of iridescent liquids, bundles of dried herbs that
seemed to
shift when she looked at them, and objects that defied explanation. A skull with eyes that followed her. A dagger whose blade
was etched
with symbols she didn’t recognize. Herrera led her past it all, his steps sure, his expression
unreadable
. He stopped in front of a stall draped in black cloth, where a woman with silver-streaked hair and eyes like polished obsidian regarded them with quiet amusement. "Ah," she said, her voice like
velvet
. "The detective. I was wondering when you’d arrive." Quinn’s grip tightened on her flashlight. "Who are you?" The woman smiled. "Names are for those who earn them." Herrera stepped between them, his presence a barrier. "She’s with me," he said. "For now." The woman’s gaze
flicked
to Quinn, assessing. "For how long, *amigo*?" Quinn’s mind raced. She had come here chasing a suspect, but now she
was trapped
in a world she didn’t understand. The body in the alley—was it Herrera’s doing? And if so, why? She forced herself to stay calm. "I want answers," she said. "About the body. About what’s happening here." Herrera turned to her, his expression
unreadable
. "You
really
want to know?" Quinn nodded, her pulse hammering in her throat. He exhaled, long and slow. "Then you’ll have to trust me." The woman at the stall laughed, a sound like wind chimes. "Trust is a fragile thing, Detective. Especially for those who walk the line between the seen and the unseen." Quinn ignored her, focusing on Herrera. "Where’s the body?" Herrera gestured to the back of the stall, where a heavy curtain hung. "Through there. But be warned—what you see might change you." Quinn hesitated. She had spent her life chasing the truth, even when it was ugly. She stepped forward, pushing the curtain aside. The room beyond was small, dimly lit by a single candle. And there, on a table, was a body—her partner, Detective Morris. His face was pale, his skin str
etched
too tight over his bones. His eyes were open, staring blankly at the ceiling. Quinn’s breath caught in her throat. "What the hell is this?" Herrera didn’t answer. He just stood there, his expression
unreadable
. The woman at the stall spoke again, her voice a whisper. "He’s not dead. Not
really
." Quinn’s hand shook as she reached out, her fingers brushing against Morris’s cold skin. "Then what is he?" The candle
flickered
, casting long shadows across the walls. The air grew thick, heavy with something unseen. And then, just for a moment, Morris’s lips parted. His eyes
flickered
, focusing on her. "You shouldn’t have come," he whispered. Quinn’s blood turned to ice. Behind her, Herrera sighed. "Told you it would change you." She turned, her back to the body, her heart pounding. "What is going on?" The woman at the stall stepped closer, her smile widening. "Welcome to the Veil, Detective. And welcome to the game." Quinn’s mind reeled. She had chased Herrera here, thinking she
was closing
in on a criminal. But this—this was something else entirely. Something supernatural. She looked at Herrera, her voice
barely above a whisper
. "What do I do now?" He met her gaze, his eyes dark with something she couldn’t name. "You decide," he said. "Do you walk away, or do you stay and find out what they’ve done to him?" Quinn’s fingers curled into fists. She had spent her life fighting the darkness. She wasn’t about to turn away now. She took a deep breath, steeling herself. "I stay." Herrera nodded, just once. "Good." The woman at the stall clapped her hands together, her laughter ringing out like a bell. "Excellent. Now, let’s see what you’re made of, Detective." Quinn turned back to the body on the table, her resolve hardening. She would find out what had been done to Morris. And she would make sure no one else suffered the same fate. The market around her
seemed to
pulse with energy, the stalls shifting, the voices murmuring. She was no longer just a detective chasing a suspect. She was in the thick of something far greater. And she
wasn’t backing
down.
Evaluation details
Result
Evaluator
Details
Meta Data
100.0000%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags
9
adverbTagCount
0
adverbTags
(empty)
64.5390%
AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <1% AI-ism adverbs (57 tracked)
wordCount
1410
totalAiIsmAdverbs
5
found
0
adverb
"barely above a whisper"
count
1
1
adverb
"really"
count
4
highlights
0
"barely above a whisper"
1
"really"
100.0000%
AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
100.0000%
AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
21.9858%
AI-ism word frequency
Target: <1% AI-ism words (140 tracked)
wordCount
1410
totalAiIsms
11
found
0
word
"flickered"
count
2
1
word
"flicked"
count
1
2
word
"glint"
count
1
3
word
"velvet"
count
2
4
word
"unreadable"
count
3
5
word
"weight"
count
1
6
word
"etched"
count
1
highlights
0
"flickered"
1
"flicked"
2
"glint"
3
"velvet"
4
"unreadable"
5
"weight"
6
"etched"
100.0000%
Cliche density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches
0
maxInWindow
0
found
(empty)
highlights
(empty)
100.0000%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells
0
narrationSentences
117
matches
(empty)
100.0000%
Filter word density
Target: ≤12% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount
0
hedgeCount
2
narrationSentences
117
filterMatches
(empty)
hedgeMatches
0
"seemed to"
100.0000%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤10% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount
1
totalSentences
145
matches
0
"seen that look"
100.0000%
Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs
53
mean
26.3
std
21.23
cv
0.807
sampleLengths
0
104
1
86
2
32
3
67
4
25
5
33
6
9
7
34
8
50
9
17
10
34
11
46
12
13
13
6
14
51
15
79
16
55
17
39
18
15
19
9
20
10
21
15
22
11
23
33
24
18
25
12
26
8
27
11
28
30
29
9
30
23
31
22
32
43
33
11
34
10
35
16
36
18
37
32
38
6
39
5
40
10
41
14
42
20
43
24
44
15
45
32
46
20
47
9
48
5
49
25
100.0000%
Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤5% passive sentences
passiveCount
3
totalSentences
117
matches
0
"were lined"
1
"was etched"
2
"was trapped"
100.0000%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤10% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount
4
totalVerbs
207
matches
0
"was walking"
1
"was looking"
2
"was closing"
3
"wasn’t backing"
100.0000%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount
1206
adjectiveStacks
0
stackExamples
(empty)
adverbCount
33
adverbRatio
0.02736318407960199
lyAdverbCount
8
lyAdverbRatio
0.006633499170812604
100.0000%
Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences
145
echoCount
0
echoWords
(empty)
100.0000%
Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences
145
mean
9.61
std
6.45
cv
0.671
sampleLengths
0
20
1
26
2
23
3
32
4
3
5
19
6
13
7
15
8
36
9
3
10
3
11
2
12
13
13
14
14
5
15
22
16
3
17
3
18
14
19
12
20
8
21
13
22
9
23
3
24
13
25
5
26
8
27
7
28
5
29
4
30
5
31
23
32
6
33
12
34
21
35
17
36
17
37
3
38
12
39
12
40
7
41
2
42
18
43
8
44
18
45
7
46
6
47
2
48
4
49
15
40.3448%
Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats
14
diversityRatio
0.2620689655172414
totalSentences
145
uniqueOpeners
38
91.6667%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤30% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags
9
fancyCount
3
fancyTags
0
"she said, her voice cutting through the downpour (say, cut)"
1
"he said, his voice smooth, accented (say, accent)"
2
"he whispered (whisper)"
89.3257%