Run: 2026-02-17-01KHNF2V8NH2E5XF0EP0N3AHBN

Run Details

Duration:
34.2s
Cost:
$0.000000
Provider:
Arcee AI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The Heartstone pendant pulsed with a warmth that seeped through Rory's shirt, a steady rhythm against her skin that grew stronger with each step. The forest around them had shifted — not in a way she could point to exactly, but in the quality of the air, the slant of the light through the canopy, the way the shadows seemed to hold themselves differently. The trees here were older, their trunks wider than any she'd seen in Richmond Park, their leaves a deeper, more vivid green that shimmered with an otherworldly iridescence. Nyx moved ahead of them, a living shadow that flowed between the trees rather than walked. Even in their incorporeal form, they cast no shadow of their own — a detail that made Rory's skin prickle with unease. Isolde followed behind, her silver hair catching the filtered light like strands of moonlight woven through the air. Rory touched the pendant again, feeling its heat intensify. "It's getting stronger," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. The forest seemed to demand quiet, as if speaking too loudly might shatter the delicate balance of this place. "The Heartstone responds to Hel's proximity," Isolde said, her voice musical and strange. "But we are not yet in Hel itself. This is the threshold — the space between worlds where the Veil grows thin." They emerged into a clearing where the ground was covered in a carpet of flowers that shouldn't exist together — snowdrops and bluebells, foxgloves and forget-me-nots, all blooming simultaneously regardless of season. In the center stood three ancient oak trees, their branches intertwined to form a natural archway. Runes were carved into their bark, glowing with a soft silver light that pulsed in time with Rory's pendant. "The standing stones," Isolde murmured, moving toward them with reverence. "They mark the boundary between realms." Rory approached cautiously, reaching out to touch one of the runes. The moment her fingers made contact, the Heartstone flared with heat, and she snatched her hand back with a hiss. "What the hell was that?" "The stones recognize the Heartstone," Isolde explained. "They know you carry a piece of Hel within this realm." Nyx solidified beside them, their form coalescing from shadow to something almost human — tall, with indistinct features that seemed to shift when Rory tried to focus on them. "We should move quickly. The longer we linger in the threshold, the more attention we'll draw." "Attention from what?" Rory asked, but the question died on her lips as she noticed movement in the shadows beyond the clearing. Not Nyx's shadow — something else. Something that watched. Isolde's hand found her arm, cold and firm. "Do not look directly. They are the border guardians, and they are curious about strangers who pass through their domain." Rory forced her gaze forward, toward the archway of trees. Through it, she could see a landscape that didn't belong in Richmond Park — rolling hills covered in vineyards heavy with grapes the color of amethyst, orchards where trees bore fruit in impossible combinations, and in the distance, the spires of a city that gleamed like polished amber. "Dymas," Isolde said, following her gaze. "The realm of Prince Belphegor. But we must be cautious — the Prince does not welcome uninvited guests, especially those carrying Hel-forged artifacts." The Heartstone pulsed again, and this time Rory felt a pull toward the archway, a magnetic attraction that made her feet move forward almost of their own accord. She stopped herself with effort, turning to face Isolde. "You knew about this pendant. You knew what it was when you gave it to me." "I suspected," Isolde corrected gently. "The Heartstone is rare, and those who bear it are often drawn to Hel whether they wish it or not. But I did not know you would be its bearer until I saw you." "Why me?" Rory asked, the question that had haunted her since receiving the pendant. Isolde's lavender eyes held ancient wisdom that made Rory feel like a child. "The Heartstone chooses its bearer for reasons even the Fae cannot always discern. Perhaps it sees something in you that others do not." Nyx moved between them, their form solidifying further until Rory could make out sharp features and eyes that held no pupils — just endless, consuming darkness. "Speculation can wait. We have a mission, and we are running out of time." They stepped through the archway together, and the world shifted around them like a kaleidoscope turning. The air grew warmer, carrying scents that made Rory's mouth water — baking bread, roasting meat, spices she couldn't name. The ground beneath their feet changed from forest loam to smooth stone that glowed faintly with the same amber light she'd seen in the distance. "Welcome to Dymas," Isolde said, her voice tinged with something Rory couldn't quite identify — nostalgia, perhaps, or regret. The city before them was a marvel of excess and beauty. Buildings rose in graceful curves, their surfaces decorated with mosaics that depicted scenes of feasting and celebration. Bridges arched over canals filled with water so clear Rory could see fish swimming below, their scales reflecting colors that seemed to shift and change. The architecture was unlike anything she'd seen in London — a blend of classical Greek columns, Middle Eastern domes, and something else entirely that defied categorization. But it was the people — if they could be called that — who truly made Rory's breath catch. They moved through the streets in a constant flow of activity, some carrying baskets of exotic fruits, others pushing carts laden with wheels of cheese and loaves of bread. There were humans among them, but also beings of light and shadow, creatures with horns and tails, and things that seemed to be made entirely of crystal or liquid metal. A group of children ran past, laughing, their skin the color of burnished copper, their eyes glowing like tiny suns. They paid no attention to the newcomers, too absorbed in their game. "The Prince's subjects," Isolde explained. "Helbound souls who have found their place in Dymas. Here, they serve the realm through creation rather than destruction." Nyx's form flickered, their attention drawn to movement in the shadows between buildings. "We are being followed." "Of course we are," Isolde said calmly. "Prince Belphegor's spies are everywhere. But they will not approach while I am with you — my presence grants you a measure of protection, at least for now." Rory touched the Heartstone again, feeling its warmth intensify as they moved deeper into the city. The streets were alive with sound — music from unseen musicians, the chatter of countless conversations in languages she couldn't understand, the sizzle of food cooking in countless kitchens. Everywhere she looked, there was abundance — food, drink, beauty, pleasure. It was beautiful. It was terrifying. "Why would anyone want to leave this place?" Rory asked, unable to keep the wonder from her voice. Isolde's expression grew sad. "Because all excess comes at a price, Aurora. In Dymas, the price is your soul. The longer you stay, the more you become part of the realm itself, until you are no longer truly yourself, but merely another piece of the Prince's domain." They turned down a narrower street, and the sounds of the city faded behind them. Here, the buildings were older, their surfaces carved with scenes that made Rory's skin crawl — images of consumption and excess taken to horrific extremes. Bodies merged with furniture, faces stretched in eternal pleasure or agony, mouths open in silent screams. "This is the old quarter," Isolde said quietly. "Where the Prince's oldest subjects dwell. They have forgotten what it means to be human, if they ever were human at all." Nyx solidified fully, their form now that of a tall human man with sharp features and eyes that held centuries of darkness. "We should move faster. The wards are changing — something is wrong." Rory felt it then, a shift in the air like the moment before a storm breaks. The Heartstone burned against her chest, and she looked up to see the amber sky darkening, clouds gathering that hadn't been there moments before. "The Prince knows we're here," Isolde said, her voice tight with tension. "He's closing the city." The streets around them began to change — buildings shifting, walls moving, the very layout of the city rearranging itself like a puzzle being solved. Rory grabbed Isolde's arm as the ground beneath them tilted, and they stumbled together. "We need to find shelter," Nyx said, their voice a whisper on the wind. "Somewhere the Prince's influence cannot reach." But as Rory looked around at the transforming city, at the beauty that was becoming something else, something hungry, she realized that in Dymas, there might be nowhere truly safe. The Heartstone pulsed against her chest like a second heartbeat, and she wondered if she'd made a terrible mistake in coming here. The air grew heavy with the scent of cooking meat and baking bread, but beneath it lay something else — the coppery tang of blood, the sweetness of decay. The city was changing, becoming something else, and Rory had the sudden, terrible certainty that they were being herded, guided by unseen hands toward a destination they wouldn't choose for themselves. "Welcome to Dymas," Isolde whispered again, but this time there was no wonder in her voice, only warning. "Welcome to the realm of endless appetite."
created_at"2026-02-17T09:32:47.628932+00:00" 2/17/2026, 9:32:47 AM
model"arcee-ai/trinity-large-preview:free"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency243
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time34109
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion2447
native_tokens_prompt1448
native_tokens_completion1907
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
usage0
router(null)
provider_responses
0
id"9cf446b526345567-IAD"
status200
is_byokfalse
latency135
endpoint_id"239c00d5-c404-4d17-b243-6a645212dc95"
provider_name"Arcee AI"
model_permaslug"arcee-ai/trinity-large-preview"
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771320732-IpTO0AfKQNNFQI8jc7O2"
upstream_id"9cf446b526345567-IAD"
total_cost0
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Arcee AI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
38.89% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags16
adverbTagCount4
adverbTags
0"Isolde corrected gently [gently]"
1"Isolde said calmly [calmly]"
2"Isolde said quietly [quietly]"
3"Isolde whispered again [again]"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.444
leniency0.889
rawRatio0.25
effectiveRatio0.222
74.33% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1558
totalAiIsmAdverbs8
found
0
adverb"barely above a whisper"
count1
1
adverb"cautiously"
count1
2
adverb"quickly"
count1
3
adverb"gently"
count1
4
adverb"truly"
count3
5
adverb"very"
count1
highlights
0"barely above a whisper"
1"cautiously"
2"quickly"
3"gently"
4"truly"
5"very"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
48.65% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1558
totalAiIsms16
found
0
word"pulsed"
count4
1
word"warmth"
count2
2
word"shimmered"
count1
3
word"otherworldly"
count1
4
word"whisper"
count2
5
word"magnetic"
count1
6
word"kaleidoscope"
count1
7
word"tinged"
count1
8
word"crystal"
count1
9
word"flickered"
count1
10
word"tension"
count1
highlights
0"pulsed"
1"warmth"
2"shimmered"
3"otherworldly"
4"whisper"
5"magnetic"
6"kaleidoscope"
7"tinged"
8"crystal"
9"flickered"
10"tension"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells1
narrationSentences70
matches
0"e with unease"
0.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount7
narrationSentences70
filterMatches
0"feel"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"tried to"
2"began to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences90
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen47
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1576
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions14
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
50.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions62
wordCount1180
uniqueNames11
maxNameDensity1.95
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Heartstone6
Rory23
Richmond2
Park2
Nyx7
Isolde17
London1
Greek1
Middle1
Eastern1
Dymas1
persons
0"Heartstone"
1"Rory"
2"Nyx"
3"Isolde"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"London"
3"Dymas"
globalScore0.525
windowScore0.5
0.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences60
glossingSentenceCount4
matches
0"as if speaking too loudly might shatter the delicate balance of this place"
1"quite identify — nostalgia, perhaps, or regret"
2"colors that seemed to shift and change"
3"things that seemed to be made entirely of crystal or liquid metal"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.635
wordCount1576
matches
0"not in a way she could point to exactly, but in the quality of the air, the slant of the light through th"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences90
matches(empty)
98.21% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs40
mean39.4
std19.45
cv0.494
sampleLengths
092
156
239
335
467
516
636
718
845
931
1028
1158
1229
1353
1439
1514
1636
1740
1861
1919
2079
2178
2232
2324
2417
2535
2656
276
2818
2947
3056
3130
3234
3340
3416
3539
3620
3752
3860
3925
85.21% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount4
totalSentences70
matches
0"was covered"
1"were carved"
2"being solved"
3"being herded"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs197
matches(empty)
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount17
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences16
totalSentences90
ratio0.178
matches
0"The forest around them had shifted — not in a way she could point to exactly, but in the quality of the air, the slant of the light through the canopy, the way the shadows seemed to hold themselves differently."
1"Even in their incorporeal form, they cast no shadow of their own — a detail that made Rory's skin prickle with unease."
2"They emerged into a clearing where the ground was covered in a carpet of flowers that shouldn't exist together — snowdrops and bluebells, foxgloves and forget-me-nots, all blooming simultaneously regardless of season."
3"Nyx solidified beside them, their form coalescing from shadow to something almost human — tall, with indistinct features that seemed to shift when Rory tried to focus on them."
4"Not Nyx's shadow — something else."
5"Through it, she could see a landscape that didn't belong in Richmond Park — rolling hills covered in vineyards heavy with grapes the color of amethyst, orchards where trees bore fruit in impossible combinations, and in the distance, the spires of a city that gleamed like polished amber."
6"Nyx moved between them, their form solidifying further until Rory could make out sharp features and eyes that held no pupils — just endless, consuming darkness."
7"The air grew warmer, carrying scents that made Rory's mouth water — baking bread, roasting meat, spices she couldn't name."
8"\"Welcome to Dymas,\" Isolde said, her voice tinged with something Rory couldn't quite identify — nostalgia, perhaps, or regret."
9"The architecture was unlike anything she'd seen in London — a blend of classical Greek columns, Middle Eastern domes, and something else entirely that defied categorization."
10"But it was the people — if they could be called that — who truly made Rory's breath catch."
11"The streets were alive with sound — music from unseen musicians, the chatter of countless conversations in languages she couldn't understand, the sizzle of food cooking in countless kitchens."
12"Everywhere she looked, there was abundance — food, drink, beauty, pleasure."
13"Here, the buildings were older, their surfaces carved with scenes that made Rory's skin crawl — images of consumption and excess taken to horrific extremes."
14"The streets around them began to change — buildings shifting, walls moving, the very layout of the city rearranging itself like a puzzle being solved."
15"The air grew heavy with the scent of cooking meat and baking bread, but beneath it lay something else — the coppery tang of blood, the sweetness of decay."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1165
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount42
adverbRatio0.036051502145922745
lyAdverbCount17
lyAdverbRatio0.014592274678111588
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences90
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences90
mean17.51
std9.41
cv0.538
sampleLengths
024
140
228
316
422
518
69
711
819
913
1022
1132
1216
1319
1410
156
1611
1720
185
197
2011
2129
2216
2322
246
253
268
2720
2810
2948
306
3123
3228
339
3416
355
3634
3714
3813
3923
4026
4114
4216
4320
4425
4519
4611
4717
4825
4926
61.11% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats10
diversityRatio0.43333333333333335
totalSentences90
uniqueOpeners39
49.02% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences68
matches
0"Everywhere she looked, there was"
ratio0.015
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount9
totalSentences68
matches
0"she said, her voice barely"
1"They emerged into a clearing"
2"She stopped herself with effort,"
3"They stepped through the archway"
4"They moved through the streets"
5"They paid no attention to"
6"It was beautiful."
7"It was terrifying."
8"They turned down a narrower"
ratio0.132
26.18% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount59
totalSentences68
matches
0"The Heartstone pendant pulsed with"
1"The forest around them had"
2"The trees here were older,"
3"Nyx moved ahead of them,"
4"Isolde followed behind, her silver"
5"Rory touched the pendant again,"
6"she said, her voice barely"
7"The forest seemed to demand"
8"Isolde said, her voice musical"
9"They emerged into a clearing"
10"Isolde murmured, moving toward them"
11"Rory approached cautiously, reaching out"
12"The moment her fingers made"
13"Nyx solidified beside them, their"
14"Rory asked, but the question"
15"Something that watched."
16"Isolde's hand found her arm,"
17"Rory forced her gaze forward,"
18"Isolde said, following her gaze"
19"The Heartstone pulsed again, and"
ratio0.868
73.53% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences68
matches
0"Even in their incorporeal form,"
ratio0.015
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences46
technicalSentenceCount14
matches
0"The Heartstone pendant pulsed with a warmth that seeped through Rory's shirt, a steady rhythm against her skin that grew stronger with each step."
1"Even in their incorporeal form, they cast no shadow of their own — a detail that made Rory's skin prickle with unease."
2"They emerged into a clearing where the ground was covered in a carpet of flowers that shouldn't exist together — snowdrops and bluebells, foxgloves and forget-m…"
3"Through it, she could see a landscape that didn't belong in Richmond Park — rolling hills covered in vineyards heavy with grapes the color of amethyst, orchards…"
4"The Heartstone pulsed again, and this time Rory felt a pull toward the archway, a magnetic attraction that made her feet move forward almost of their own accord…"
5"Isolde's lavender eyes held ancient wisdom that made Rory feel like a child."
6"Nyx moved between them, their form solidifying further until Rory could make out sharp features and eyes that held no pupils — just endless, consuming darkness."
7"The air grew warmer, carrying scents that made Rory's mouth water — baking bread, roasting meat, spices she couldn't name."
8"Buildings rose in graceful curves, their surfaces decorated with mosaics that depicted scenes of feasting and celebration."
9"Bridges arched over canals filled with water so clear Rory could see fish swimming below, their scales reflecting colors that seemed to shift and change."
10"A group of children ran past, laughing, their skin the color of burnished copper, their eyes glowing like tiny suns."
11"Here, the buildings were older, their surfaces carved with scenes that made Rory's skin crawl — images of consumption and excess taken to horrific extremes."
12"Nyx solidified fully, their form now that of a tall human man with sharp features and eyes that held centuries of darkness."
13"But as Rory looked around at the transforming city, at the beauty that was becoming something else, something hungry, she realized that in Dymas, there might be…"
0.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags16
uselessAdditionCount6
matches
0"she said, her voice barely above a whisper"
1"Isolde said, her voice musical and strange"
2"Rory asked, but the question died on her lips as she noticed movement in the shadows beyond the clearing"
3"Rory asked, unable to keep the wonder from her voice"
4"Isolde said, her voice tight with tension"
5"Nyx said, their voice a whisper on the wind"
11.11% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags16
fancyCount5
fancyTags
0"Isolde murmured (murmur)"
1"Isolde explained (explain)"
2"Isolde corrected gently (correct)"
3"Isolde explained (explain)"
4"Isolde whispered again (whisper)"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.444
leniency0.889
rawRatio0.313
effectiveRatio0.278
67.2080%