Run: 2026-02-19-01KHT00219A0WVA8SYR7XX929W

Run Details

Duration:
1m 10s
Cost:
$0.009957
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert fiction writer. Always keep the following rules in mind: - Write in past tense and use General English spelling, grammar, and colloquialisms/slang. - Write in active voice - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. - Avoid adverbs and cliches and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Convey events and story through dialogue. - Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. - Skip "he/she said said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech - Avoid mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or add unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Reduce indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" When writing text: - NEVER conclude the scene on your own, follow the beat instructions very closely. - NEVER end with foreshadowing. - NEVER write further than what I prompt you with. - AVOID imagining possible endings, NEVER deviate from the instructions. - STOP EARLY if the continuation contains what was required in the instructions. You do not need to fill out the full amount of words possible.
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Continue the story using the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>

Model response

AI
The air changed the moment they stepped across the shimmer. It stopped being London — thin, exhaust-stung, familiar — and became something that smelled of candied citrus and iron. Aurora kept her hand tight on the pendant beneath her collar. The Heartstone had started to warm against her skin on the path in the scrubby park where the rift had opened; now it throbbed like a second heartbeat, a tiny, impatient drum against bone. "Do you feel that?" Eva's voice tasted thin, as if the sound had been dipped in syrup. She kept close, knuckles white around the strap of her satchel. Her eyes kept skimming the horizon and returning to Aurora, like she expected the world to answer back with instructions. Rory's lips pressed into a line. The crescent scar on her left wrist itched as if the skin remembered a different urgency. "It's not welcoming," she said. They had not chosen Dymas for comfort. The pendant had pulled; the pulse had been undeniable, a warmth that keyed to openings in the Veil. Aurora walked because curiosity had a particular gravity for her and because, if the Heartstone had come from here, it might answer things that hummed beneath the surface of her life. The sky above spread like a slab of amber glass, warm light pouring through as if through honey. It brightened the grapes that dotted the endless vineyards — grapes the size of fists, their skins almost translucent, veins glinting like strings of molten gold. Trees lined the avenues, trunks braided with vines that bore fruit like miniature moons. Leaves chimed softly when the breeze passed, not with a wind but with something that moved from inside them, a slow, liquid music. "Like a painting someone licked too many times," Nyx said, and the voice skimmed across their words like mothwings. They had taken solid form again, a tall slip of shadow outlined by faint violet. Where they moved, the amber seemed to swallow edges and give everything a softened outline. When Nyx reached out, a cluster of berries clung to their fingers and left no stain where shadow met fruit. Rory sniffed and tasted sweetness at the back of her throat. "You look ridiculous," she told them, and meant it as balm. She needed the normal to anchor her wandering thoughts. Nyx's shoulders shifted as if in a laugh. "I prefer 'draped in taste.'" They moved deeper and found the orchards opening into a clearing where tables had spread like islands. The tables were enormous, polished to a mirror sheen, laden with platters of food that seemed to breathe. Roasts seethed with simmering glazes; jelly domes sat with captured storms inside, lightning regular and harmless; platters of fish sparkled as if they were still breathing. The closer they walked, the louder the place became — not with people but with sound that suggested people: cutlery tapping in a rhythm that sounded like counting, distant voices layered into harmony, a laugh that trailed a second, lower undertone as though two mouths shared it. "There's so much," Eva whispered. "Everything here was made to be eaten," Nyx said, and their whisper threaded through the air, making the distant copper bells resonate. They reached a hand toward a pile of leaves that glittered with sugar. The leaves shivered under their touch and exhaled a scent that smelled of warm bread and river mud. A figure watched them from beneath a trellis: a man in an apron, his eyes too bright, his smile an arrangement of too many teeth. He moved with the same slow confidence as the landscape, not hurried but deliberate, like a predator dressing for ceremony. "New guests," he said when he stepped out so the light fell across his face. He had scars that glittered like gold leaf along his forearms. Without waiting, he presented a plate — a blossom blooming from sugar and steam. "Welcome to Dymas." Rory held up her hand. The blade at her hip, the Fae-forged dagger Isolde had given her, was an odd comfort; it gave off a cold that pushed at the heat around them. The moonsilver caught the amber light and seemed to drink it away, leaving a thin smear of blue where it passed. The pendant at her neck thudded against her breastbone, hot as if it had been set inside a living thing. It pulsed faster now, as if urging her forward. "How do we—" Eva began. "Shouldn't we leave?" someone else asked. The voice came from the rear where a man in a working jacket hesitated, hands pushing back hair from his forehead. He had been silent until that breath. He had chosen to come for reasons he refused to explain, a rare, practical presence in their odd band. Nyx stepped between them and the man at the trellis. They did not move like a person stepping forward as much as shadow rearranging itself. Their hand passed through the man's sleeve with no resistance; the man's skin puckered as if something cold had walked over it and then smoothed. "You all smell like curiosity," the cook said. "It is a fine scent. Belphegor appreciates appetite." The name landed like a stone. Nobody moved. Nobody invited trouble. The atmosphere had been decadent and unaware; the moment a proper name dropped, the place sharpened in a way that tasted like metal. "Who is Belphegor?" Eva asked, voice threaded with a child's caution. Her fingers found Aurora's and tightened. "He collects," Nyx said. "Everything that can be desired and has a price." They tilted their head, watching the plates as if reading a quiet ledger in the shimmer. "He rules here, soft and patient as a maw." The cook smiled wider. "Then taste. Taste and bind yourself to flavour." They walked among the tables as if treading through a dream reconstructed from recipes. The chairs were crafted from braided vines, their backs carved with little sigils that looked like spooned eyes. On one table a chandelier hung upside down, dripping glistening custard that never fell. On another, a fountain tossed clear syrup into the air; little fish flicked through it and left trails like ink brushstrokes. Fruit rolled once at their feet and stopped, as though obeying an inscrutable command. "I don't like it," the practical man muttered. He dabbed at his mouth though his lips were spotless. He barked a laugh that had no real heat. "It feels staged. Not staged, but rehearsed. Like they're playing at being alive." "Everything here was staged long before any of us were born," Nyx observed. "The world likes repeating itself." At the far edge of the clearing, beyond a mound of loaves that steamed with sighs, a low wall of hedges shielded a courtyard. Vines climbed the wall, their tendrils threaded with tiny mirrors that reflected the amber sky in shards. From within the courtyard came music that was almost a language; it had accents that prickled the skin, pauses that translated into memory. Rory walked toward it, and the Heartstone's throb felt like somebody running a hand along the inside of her sternum. The pendant cast a faint red wash beneath her collarbone; the glow seemed to bleed into the air and touch the vines as if they remembered colour incorrectly. "Don't go," Eva said. The plea had more backbone now, threaded with something fierce. "Then stay," Rory told her. She kept walking. Curiosity pulled; the pendant grounded it with a thirst all its own. When she reached the hedge, the mirrors tilted and reflected her face back twenty times, an echo of expressions she had not realised she'd made. Behind the wall a colonnade loomed. Statues had been carved from crystallised sugar and sat in frozen postures. They were certainly statues at first glance, regal figures with crowns of pastry. The closer she came, the more she saw the seams along their necks, the faint stitches that suggested they had been repaired and restored so often that the repairs had become decor. Between them, a doorway yawned, rimmed with moulded marzipan, and beyond that, darker air pooled, the kind that did not respect the rule of amber light. A draft sighed through the doorway like a story exhaled. The Heartstone pulsed. Rory felt it like a small animal under her palm, eager to move. "There's a thinness here," Nyx said. Their voice softened, as if from afar. "The Veil thins like cloth worn at the elbow. A place where the Barrier favors appetite." "Belphegor's garden," the cook offered, as if reciting a line from a playbook. "People come from beyond with wishes that taste like constellations. They are fed wishes until they are quiet." Rory listened to Nyx. The Shade had the odd habit of stating what they found and leaving the interpretation to other people. There was something steady in that. She stepped into the doorway. The air beyond changed again. The amber became denser, thicker, almost syrupy, and temperature dropped in contradictions — a cool that bit like crushed mint and a warmth that soothed like milk. Her fingers trailed along the wall; the sugar statue's jaw was smooth and left a dusting of sweetness on her knuckle. The Fae blade at her hip hummed against her thigh, a tiny, cold pain like ice on a cut. It glowed a ghostly silver where it touched shadow; where it did, the amber light exhaled and lost colour. A corridor opened to a vast chamber. The chamber was a banquet hall without walls, only plates of food that stretched into distance, arcs of standing tables connected by bridges of bread. The ceiling was not a ceiling but a sky of suspended candles, each flame a miniature theatre replaying a scene. Among the food, at intervals, sat small cages of glass. Inside some were people frozen mid-bite, expression slack, eyes like polished bone. Their mouths moved slowly in a loop, as if chewing through years. Eva sucked a breath that sounded like a sob pressed into a sound. "They're not asleep," she said. "They're not dead." "They are bound," Nyx replied. They drifted nearer to the cages, and a shadow leaned out from behind a frozen man, watching as much as if it were watching a performance. "Souls contracted." Rory's stomach tightened into tight knots, not hunger; a thread of obligation. Each cage bore a lacquer label, tiny letters shifting like fish scales. Names. Dates. A small glyph she recognised, an old warden mark — then crossed out, overwritten. The pendant pulsed like a frantic heart. "Look," the practical man said. He tapped a jar perched on a pedestal near a fountain. Inside, a liquid shivered with the same red as the Heartstone. Tiny whorls swam within. When he touched the jar, a memory pressed against his hand — the smell of his mother's raincoat, a laugh, a favourite alleyway. He recoiled as if he'd bitten into something bitter. "People bottled," Eva said, voice gone dry. She swallowed as if the air itself had become chewable. "They kept what they wanted." "Kept and curated," the cook observed, reverence in his tone now. "One man's hunger becomes an exhibit." A server glided past them, tray balanced on the palm of a hand that left no shadow where it passed. The server's mouth was full of sugar and grief. "Be careful where you taste," it sang, a line that might have been a warning if they had not wrapped it in song. Rory felt the Fae-forged blade tug at her waist as if it recognised the threat like a hound. She had felt its ability to cut wards once, a clean, true thing, and now it thrummed with intent. She put a hand on the hilt and felt the cold travel up her arm, whitening the skin. The Heartstone surged in tempo, an answering drum. For the first time since they'd arrived, she felt a precise clarity: the pendant buzzed at the presence of a rift. The cages were not just for bodies; they ringed something — the air at the chamber's centre shivered and bent, a thinness like a throat clearing. "That's it," Nyx said, and their voice was all rustle. "A tear. A knot pulled too tight." They walked the ring. The labels on the cages were names of missing people from the city; familiar street vendors, a boy from a post-code Rory could have traced on a map, a woman's name she had read in last week's missing notices and almost forgotten. Each label made the Heartstone warm white-hot. The pendant seemed to know the geography of this place better than they did; it drew them, tugged like a sinew connecting shoulder to bone. "Why would they keep people like this?" Eva demanded. Her voice had an edge that made plates vibrate faintly. "Sometimes a world like this kept what it liked," the cook said. "Sometimes people traded pieces of themselves for the indulgence. Sometimes things were taken." Nyx tilted their head. "Belphegor liked bargains that left him fat and others hollow." A hush fell that did not belong to the room so much as to something listening. The distant laughter stopped mid-arc. The candles winked. The vines leaned in. Rory's fingers tightened on the pendant until the metal warmed the skin of her throat. The Fae blade at her hip sang in a voice only she could hear, a small note that promised cutting and clarity. She thought of Isolde's hands when she had given the blade to her, of the Seer's she had left behind in the grove who spoke in riddles and left breadcrumbs. She had not come to Dymas for salvation. She had come because something that had come from here asked for answers. "Then we do not bargain," she said, and the words landed in the clearing like a coin on glass. She slid her hand along the blade's hilt and felt it cool the heat of the Heartstone, a counterpoint. Nyx watched her with eyes that seemed to gather shadow and spill it gently. "Or we bargain, but on our terms." They did not cross into the center yet. They walked the ring once more, letting the world show them its seams. The feast glittered and the cages breathed. Somewhere beyond the mirrored hedges a new chorus rose, a layered hymn that tasted metallic and sweet. The pendant pulsed against her breastbone like someone knocking on the inside of her ribs. The Fae-forged blade hummed with low steel. The group stood in the heart of indulgence, and awe leached into unease until it became a tool they could wield. "One step," Eva whispered. "One step," the man echoed, steady as a hinge. Nyx's grin, made of shadow and mischief, unfolded. "All doors had steps," they murmured. "Best to count them first." Aurora took a breath, long and steady, and felt the world press back with the knowledge that had been kept here, polished until it gleamed like a meal. She lifted the Fae blade and moved forward. The pendant warmed like a promise and the amber world watched, curious and patient.
created_at"2026-02-19T03:44:45.648Z" 2/19/2026, 3:44:45 AM
model"openai/gpt-5-mini-2025-08-07"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency14056
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time69633
tokens_prompt1816
tokens_completion4410
native_tokens_prompt1706
native_tokens_completion4765
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning1536
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.0099565
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"c4f66d01-20b0-4c27-a225-438ea22fda43"
id"resp_0576e1e61ac14bac016996872de8708196b3e5fbddbd3b59e4"
is_byokfalse
latency163
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5-mini-2025-08-07"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771472685-i94IxgpoIvrK3xpGRxIa"
upstream_id"resp_0576e1e61ac14bac016996872de8708196b3e5fbddbd3b59e4"
total_cost0.0099565
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags31
adverbTagCount0
adverbTags(empty)
dialogueSentences50
tagDensity0.62
leniency1
rawRatio0
effectiveRatio0
94.04% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2518
totalAiIsmAdverbs3
found
0
adverb"softly"
count1
1
adverb"slowly"
count1
2
adverb"gently"
count1
highlights
0"softly"
1"slowly"
2"gently"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
54.33% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2518
totalAiIsms23
found
0
word"familiar"
count2
1
word"throbbed"
count1
2
word"pulse"
count1
3
word"warmth"
count2
4
word"glinting"
count1
5
word"simmering"
count1
6
word"whisper"
count1
7
word"predator"
count1
8
word"pulsed"
count4
9
word"maw"
count1
10
word"glistening"
count1
11
word"flicked"
count1
12
word"throb"
count1
13
word"echo"
count1
14
word"loomed"
count1
15
word"stomach"
count1
16
word"traced"
count1
17
word"echoed"
count1
highlights
0"familiar"
1"throbbed"
2"pulse"
3"warmth"
4"glinting"
5"simmering"
6"whisper"
7"predator"
8"pulsed"
9"maw"
10"glistening"
11"flicked"
12"throb"
13"echo"
14"loomed"
15"stomach"
16"traced"
17"echoed"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences170
matches(empty)
84.03% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount7
narrationSentences170
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"started to"
1"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences188
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen46
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2519
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions26
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions64
wordCount2248
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity0.62
worstName"Nyx"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Aurora"
discoveredNames
London1
Heartstone8
Aurora5
Dymas2
Veil1
Nyx14
Fae-forged3
Isolde2
Rory11
Shade1
Fae6
Seer1
Eva9
persons
0"Heartstone"
1"Aurora"
2"Nyx"
3"Isolde"
4"Rory"
5"Shade"
6"Seer"
7"Eva"
places
0"London"
1"Dymas"
2"Veil"
globalScore1
windowScore1
0.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences134
glossingSentenceCount12
matches
0"food that seemed to breathe"
1"sounded like counting, distant voices laye"
2"as if urging her forward"
3"tasted like metal"
4"as if reading a quiet ledger in the shimmer"
5"as if treading through a dream reconstructed from recipes"
6"looked like spooned eyes"
7"as though obeying an inscrutable command"
8"felt like somebody running a hand along"
9"as if reciting a line from a playbook"
10"sounded like a sob pressed into a sound"
11"eyes that seemed to gather shadow and spill it gently"
1.51% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches5
per1kWords1.985
wordCount2519
matches
0"not with a wind but with something"
1"not with people but with sound"
2"not hurried but deliberate, like a predator dressing for ceremony"
3"Not staged, but rehearsed"
4"not a ceiling but a sky of suspended candles, each flame a miniature theatre r"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences188
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs59
mean42.69
std26.93
cv0.631
sampleLengths
074
148
227
356
481
569
631
713
8108
95
1053
1145
1243
1383
145
1553
1650
1716
1834
1917
2038
2112
2281
2340
2418
2564
2648
2714
2845
2989
3026
3129
3231
3333
3491
3586
3621
3733
3847
3963
4022
4117
4252
43110
4417
4578
4619
4725
4814
4928
94.94% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences170
matches
0"been dipped"
1"were crafted"
2"been carved"
3"been repaired"
4"been kept"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount1
totalVerbs400
matches
0"were watching"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount9
semicolonCount17
flaggedSentences23
totalSentences188
ratio0.122
matches
0"It stopped being London — thin, exhaust-stung, familiar — and became something that smelled of candied citrus and iron."
1"The Heartstone had started to warm against her skin on the path in the scrubby park where the rift had opened; now it throbbed like a second heartbeat, a tiny, impatient drum against bone."
2"The pendant had pulled; the pulse had been undeniable, a warmth that keyed to openings in the Veil."
3"It brightened the grapes that dotted the endless vineyards — grapes the size of fists, their skins almost translucent, veins glinting like strings of molten gold."
4"Roasts seethed with simmering glazes; jelly domes sat with captured storms inside, lightning regular and harmless; platters of fish sparkled as if they were still breathing."
5"The closer they walked, the louder the place became — not with people but with sound that suggested people: cutlery tapping in a rhythm that sounded like counting, distant voices layered into harmony, a laugh that trailed a second, lower undertone as though two mouths shared it."
6"Without waiting, he presented a plate — a blossom blooming from sugar and steam."
7"The blade at her hip, the Fae-forged dagger Isolde had given her, was an odd comfort; it gave off a cold that pushed at the heat around them."
8"Their hand passed through the man's sleeve with no resistance; the man's skin puckered as if something cold had walked over it and then smoothed."
9"The atmosphere had been decadent and unaware; the moment a proper name dropped, the place sharpened in a way that tasted like metal."
10"On another, a fountain tossed clear syrup into the air; little fish flicked through it and left trails like ink brushstrokes."
11"From within the courtyard came music that was almost a language; it had accents that prickled the skin, pauses that translated into memory."
12"The pendant cast a faint red wash beneath her collarbone; the glow seemed to bleed into the air and touch the vines as if they remembered colour incorrectly."
13"Curiosity pulled; the pendant grounded it with a thirst all its own."
14"The amber became denser, thicker, almost syrupy, and temperature dropped in contradictions — a cool that bit like crushed mint and a warmth that soothed like milk."
15"Her fingers trailed along the wall; the sugar statue's jaw was smooth and left a dusting of sweetness on her knuckle."
16"It glowed a ghostly silver where it touched shadow; where it did, the amber light exhaled and lost colour."
17"Rory's stomach tightened into tight knots, not hunger; a thread of obligation."
18"A small glyph she recognised, an old warden mark — then crossed out, overwritten."
19"When he touched the jar, a memory pressed against his hand — the smell of his mother's raincoat, a laugh, a favourite alleyway."
20"The cages were not just for bodies; they ringed something — the air at the chamber's centre shivered and bent, a thinness like a throat clearing."
21"The labels on the cages were names of missing people from the city; familiar street vendors, a boy from a post-code Rory could have traced on a map, a woman's name she had read in last week's missing notices and almost forgotten."
22"The pendant seemed to know the geography of this place better than they did; it drew them, tugged like a sinew connecting shoulder to bone."
94.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2247
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"small animal under her"
adverbCount47
adverbRatio0.02091677792612372
lyAdverbCount10
lyAdverbRatio0.004450378282153983
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences188
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences188
mean13.4
std8.08
cv0.603
sampleLengths
010
119
211
334
417
511
620
76
816
95
107
1118
1231
1318
1426
1514
1623
1719
1815
1915
2020
2111
2211
239
248
255
2617
2718
2826
2947
305
3122
3213
3318
3425
3520
3615
3711
3814
393
405
4128
4221
4320
449
455
466
4721
487
4919
43.79% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats21
diversityRatio0.32978723404255317
totalSentences188
uniqueOpeners62
21.51% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences155
matches
0"Somewhere beyond the mirrored hedges"
ratio0.006
98.71% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount47
totalSentences155
matches
0"It stopped being London —"
1"She kept close, knuckles white"
2"Her eyes kept skimming the"
3"They had not chosen Dymas"
4"It brightened the grapes that"
5"They had taken solid form"
6"she told them, and meant"
7"She needed the normal to"
8"They moved deeper and found"
9"They reached a hand toward"
10"He moved with the same"
11"he said when he stepped"
12"He had scars that glittered"
13"It pulsed faster now, as"
14"He had been silent until"
15"He had chosen to come"
16"They did not move like"
17"Their hand passed through the"
18"Her fingers found Aurora's and"
19"They tilted their head, watching"
ratio0.303
18.06% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount137
totalSentences155
matches
0"The air changed the moment"
1"It stopped being London —"
2"Aurora kept her hand tight"
3"The Heartstone had started to"
4"Eva's voice tasted thin, as"
5"She kept close, knuckles white"
6"Her eyes kept skimming the"
7"Rory's lips pressed into a"
8"The crescent scar on her"
9"They had not chosen Dymas"
10"The pendant had pulled; the"
11"Aurora walked because curiosity had"
12"The sky above spread like"
13"It brightened the grapes that"
14"Trees lined the avenues, trunks"
15"Leaves chimed softly when the"
16"Nyx said, and the voice"
17"They had taken solid form"
18"Rory sniffed and tasted sweetness"
19"she told them, and meant"
ratio0.884
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences155
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences97
technicalSentenceCount20
matches
0"It stopped being London — thin, exhaust-stung, familiar — and became something that smelled of candied citrus and iron."
1"Aurora walked because curiosity had a particular gravity for her and because, if the Heartstone had come from here, it might answer things that hummed beneath t…"
2"It brightened the grapes that dotted the endless vineyards — grapes the size of fists, their skins almost translucent, veins glinting like strings of molten gol…"
3"Trees lined the avenues, trunks braided with vines that bore fruit like miniature moons."
4"Leaves chimed softly when the breeze passed, not with a wind but with something that moved from inside them, a slow, liquid music."
5"Roasts seethed with simmering glazes; jelly domes sat with captured storms inside, lightning regular and harmless; platters of fish sparkled as if they were sti…"
6"The closer they walked, the louder the place became — not with people but with sound that suggested people: cutlery tapping in a rhythm that sounded like counti…"
7"He had scars that glittered like gold leaf along his forearms."
8"The blade at her hip, the Fae-forged dagger Isolde had given her, was an odd comfort; it gave off a cold that pushed at the heat around them."
9"The pendant at her neck thudded against her breastbone, hot as if it had been set inside a living thing."
10"Their hand passed through the man's sleeve with no resistance; the man's skin puckered as if something cold had walked over it and then smoothed."
11"The atmosphere had been decadent and unaware; the moment a proper name dropped, the place sharpened in a way that tasted like metal."
12"At the far edge of the clearing, beyond a mound of loaves that steamed with sighs, a low wall of hedges shielded a courtyard."
13"Vines climbed the wall, their tendrils threaded with tiny mirrors that reflected the amber sky in shards."
14"The pendant cast a faint red wash beneath her collarbone; the glow seemed to bleed into the air and touch the vines as if they remembered colour incorrectly."
15"The amber became denser, thicker, almost syrupy, and temperature dropped in contradictions — a cool that bit like crushed mint and a warmth that soothed like mi…"
16"The chamber was a banquet hall without walls, only plates of food that stretched into distance, arcs of standing tables connected by bridges of bread."
17"They drifted nearer to the cages, and a shadow leaned out from behind a frozen man, watching as much as if it were watching a performance."
18"Rory felt the Fae-forged blade tug at her waist as if it recognised the threat like a hound."
19"Somewhere beyond the mirrored hedges a new chorus rose, a layered hymn that tasted metallic and sweet."
12.10% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags31
uselessAdditionCount7
matches
0"Eva's voice tasted, as if the sound had been dipped in syrup"
1"Nyx said, and the voice skimmed across their words like mothwings"
2"Eva asked, voice threaded with a child's caution"
3"the cook offered, as if reciting a line from a playbook"
4"Eva said, voice gone dry"
5"Nyx said, and their voice was all rustle"
6"she said, and the words landed in the clearing like a coin on glass"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags26
fancyCount8
fancyTags
0"Eva whispered (whisper)"
1"the practical man muttered (mutter)"
2"Nyx observed (observe)"
3"the cook observed (observe)"
4"it sang (sing)"
5"Eva demanded (demand)"
6"Eva whispered (whisper)"
7"they murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences50
tagDensity0.52
leniency1
rawRatio0.308
effectiveRatio0.308
67.2343%