Run: 2026-02-19-01KHT07WAFBYCBKAEKNC70B5EX

Run Details

Duration:
1m 1s
Cost:
$0.003665
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Romance genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>

Model response

AI
The door snapped back on its hinges, and Lucien Moreau filled the narrow hall with tailored shadow. He stood just inside Eva’s Flat, ivory cane propped against his shoulder, the blade catch gleaming in the low light. The cat, Ptolemy, shot a hard-eyed look from the doorway to the kitchen, then peeled off into the dim, tail a lash of distrust. Aurora Carter watched him from the doorway between rooms, a stack of manuscripts in her hands all but forgotten. Her blue eyes narrowed to slits as she took in the echo of his presence—the precise suit, the gloss of his hair, the peculiar, dangerous calm that always rode on him like a tailored overcoat. She hadn’t expected to see him here, not after the last time they’d spoken, the words that had burned in the air between them long after the night had closed in. “Lucien,” she said, level as a blade. The word sat in the room, neutral, almost ceremonial. He didn’t answer at first. He studied the room as if it were a map of enemies and alliances, eyes lingering on the three deadbolts on the front door, on the chalked circles scrawled near the doorframe where theo-summonings never quite worked out as planned. The cane clicked once against the floor, a measured tap that sounded like a prelude. “Hello, Rory,” he finally said, voice smooth as lacquer, as if he hadn’t vanished for months and left a dozen threads hanging in London’s underbelly. The nickname—Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora—slid through his mouth as if tasting something bitter and familiar at once. Her lips tightened. “If you came for a dramatic entrance, congratulations. You’ve got it.” She set the papers down with care, as though they might scorch the surface if she pressed too hard. The air between them crackled with something that wasn’t quite electricity and not quite heat—an old static cling of history, like a room charged with a memory they both pretended didn’t mean anything anymore. Lucien stepped forward, gliding with that odd, almost supernatural ease people accused him of having. His amber and black eyes flicked to Ptolemy, who lay in the doorway between kitchen and living room, ears flat, tail swishing with earned caution. The cat hissed once, a sharp sound that cut through the quiet like a small expenditure of violence. “The flat’s quiet enough,” Rory said more to the cat than to him, but the words carried, anyway. “Too quiet, when the door is open for visitors who don’t bother to ring first.” “Things change, Rory. One cannot always ring when one’s plan requires an entrance.” He tilted his head, letting the cane rest in the bend of his arm. The blade remained sheathed, but the suggestion of danger still hummed in the air, a low, sweet threat. Her stance shifted, a dancer’s correction in a chair held too long. “What do you want?” Her voice steadied into something almost clinical, the way she’d learned to hold herself in the moment before a case turned. “You don’t just stroll into someone’s flat unless you’re chasing something, or you’re running from something—” She cut herself off, counting the seconds in her head instead of finishing the sentence. The unfinished thought trembled on her tongue anyway. Lucien’s mouth curled, a brief ghost of a smile that never reached his eyes. “Someone’s been poking at the wrong doors, Rory. Your doors. The wrong names circling the edges of a circle you’ve been guarding.” He studied her for a long moment, as if weighing a decision that could tilt the gravity of the room. “I need a word,” he said finally, and the words tasted like danger seasoned with a dash of old ache. Her shoulders settled from their tensed angle, but only just. “You’ll get the word you want when you give me a reason to trust you again.” The litany was old, rehearsed, almost automatic. Yet there was still a spark in her that refused to go out, even after every night she’d spent telling herself not to care. “And if I cannot?” The question hovered in the space between them, a blade laid bare. Rory’s fingers found the edge of the kitchen table, tapping a rhythm that wasn’t quite a refusal and not quite a consent either. “Then you won’t get far enough to hurt me again.” Her voice softened at the edge of the sentence, not a threat so much as a recognition of what they’d shared and what they’d broken. Lucien’s eyes flickered, and for a second the demon-blood in him—if one believed the whispers—showed itself in the narrow crease by his right temple, a tiny, private tremor that betrayed his control. He looked around the room again, cataloguing the fragments of Rory’s life laid out in vignettes: a kitchen counter crowded with jars and what looked like research notes; a leather-bound notebook half filled with scrawled equations and sketches of sigils; a mug stained with dark tea, cooled to room temperature. The room wasn’t just a flat; it was a map of Rory’s mind, half-embedded in every object that lay within reach. “Eva’s Flat is a sanctuary for someone who believes in keeping a few doors closed,” Rory said, not unkindly, a thread of dry humour crossing her voice. “If you want a sanctuary, you’re in the wrong corridor.” “I am not here to sanctify doors,” he replied, the words precise, almost amused. “I am here because someone believes your door is the only thing standing between them and a much bigger problem.” The cat emitted a low, warning chuff, as if to remind both of them that even old loyalties could be tested by a predator’s presence. Rory’s gaze shifted to the street beyond the window, as if the glass could reveal the truth of what was coming. The habit of looking outward when fear rose inside. She did not like what she saw in the distance, not because it told her something definite, but because it told her that a chain had begun to rattle again, one she’d hoped never to hear. “Lucien, your timing is theatrical, as ever,” she managed, her voice a cool, clear line. “If you’re hunting information, you’ll know you’re barking up the wrong tree unless you tell me what you think you know and who sent you.” He didn’t answer with words alone. He stepped closer, the cane’s ivory handle catching a glint of the lamp. He let the tip brush the edge of the table, not enough to threaten but enough to remind her he could. “We part ways under complicated circumstances,” he said, quiet now, as if the room itself were listening. “We do not leave under the same terms. Not if what I suspect is true.” Silence stretched, thick enough to feel like a cloth drawn across the mouth of a glass. Rory did not blink. Her breath came even, the way she had learned to preserve herself while fielding a thousand little storms in a single night. “Don’t flatter yourself that you matter enough for a reconciliation arc,” she said, though even the line sounded brittle, something she did not quite believe but felt compelled to utter anyway. “You’re a tool, Lucien, and the moment you’re done using me for someone else’s game, you’ll walk again.” “Perhaps,” he conceded. “But what if the game has shifted? What if the information you’ve guarded for months now—what if it isn’t mine to keep or discard?” The room leaned in, gathering the gravity of his words. Rory’s jaw tightened and she moved a step closer to the table, as if the physical proximity could anchor her from the tremor in her hands. She set the papers down with a deliberate carefulness, the edges catching on the wood and then smoothing into their quiet place. “Tell me what you’re after, and you might find you’re not just a visitor with a blade in his pocket but a liability in someone else’s room.” Her eyes glowed a little brighter; the blue seemed to sharpen, the way ice can cut when albedo is wrong. Lucien’s mouth curved again, not a smile but something that looked more like careful calculation. “You still expect loyalty from me, Rory. You still expect me to play the long game with you.” He paused, letting the word hang, a test more than an invitation. “This is not about me needing anything from you. It’s about protection for what you’ve been guarding.” The cat’s ears flicked, a tiny, almost imperceptible warning. Ptolemy padded closer to Rory’s ankle, rubbing beneath her calf with a soft, insistent contact that asked for attention, a small shield against the growing tension. Rory bent slightly to touch the cat’s head, and in that moment her voice softened, but not the edge of it. “Protection comes with a price,” she told him, looking up into his eyes with a steadiness that looked almost fierce. “If you want a place at this table, you’ll play by my rules, not the ones you’ve learned to weaponise.” For a moment Lucien let the challenge sit between them, the weight of a decision hanging like cooled metal in the air. Then a sound—a soft, almost negligent scuff from the hallway beyond the door—made both their postures snap taut. It was as if the room exhaled at the same time, the quiet breath of a flat that suddenly felt smaller. “Someone else is coming,” Rory said, the danger in her voice not quite a shout but a sword unsheathed in a dark room. She moved a step closer to the door, her silhouette cutting a pale shape against the lamp-lit wall. Lucien’s hand moved toward his cane, though he did not draw the blade. His expression darkened, the demon’s impatience flickering behind the professional calm. “Stay behind me,” he whispered, not in the theatrical sense but as a practical warning. The hallway light flickered and there was a scuff again—the sound of shoes that did not want to belong to the height of a human step. The door at the far end of the corridor—the door to the main room that led to Eva’s Flat’s single string of mysteries—creaked with a reluctant sigh, as if someone was testing whether the locks would hold. Rory’s eyes narrowed, though she kept her body angled toward Lucien and the inner doorway. “Show me who’s walking in here,” she said, voice barely above a whisper, a coiled rope of sound that could tighten or snap depending on the next second. The sound stopped. Silence hung again, thick and unsavoury, the kind that makes the small hairs stand up at the back of your neck. Then the figure emerged, not with a dramatic stride but with the careful, almost clinical steps of someone who knew how to move in a space without ever becoming a target. A woman’s silhouette, tall but not imposing, wearing a coat that swallowed its wearer, stepped into the glow of the living room lamp. Rory’s fingers curled into the edge of the table. Her breath caught, not in fear but in a sudden, sharp recognition. The newcomer wore nothing familiar on her face, but the intersection of danger and familiarity was a familiar dance to Rory, a dance she’d hoped to avoid after the last time she’d shared a floor with a person who’d made promises her heart never forgot how to forgive. The interloper paused, letting the door close softly behind her as if she preferred the space to have less noise, less audience. Rory’s jaw set again, all defences in place, but this time the tension wasn’t simply between Rory and Lucien. It dragged in a new current, sparking with something half-remembered and wholly dangerous. Lucien slid his cane along the floor, a clear signal of readiness to spring into action, but his eyes remained on Rory with a complicated consideration she didn’t permit anyone to read easily. “Who is this?” he asked, his voice level, but the question carried a sharper edge than it should have for a simple acquaintance. The woman in the doorway inclined her head, eyes pale and calculating. Her mouth curved into a wary smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “You two always complicate the bloody simplest things,” she drawled, with a trace of laughter that sounded like steel being sharpened. “Harmain. We don’t have the luxury of time, Rory.” The name—Harmain—dropped like a stone into the room, and Rory’s breath hitched in a way that did not go unnoticed by either man. Harmain’s eyes flicked to Lucien with a cool assessment, and then to Rory as if weighing the jar of secrets that sat between them all. “You brought him here.” Harmain’s voice was a soft, dangerous thing, almost a caress that warned of what would happen if anger rose. Rory steadied herself, the papers under her hand rustling as if they might reveal the truth of the world if she could press them hard enough. “I brought nothing of the sort. This is not about you two playing spy games in a shared ruin,” she replied, the edge returning to her tone, the iron in her spine becoming a living thing. Lucien stepped closer to Rory, not imposing but present, a quiet insistence that he would not be sidelined by someone who had no trust in their past. “If Harmain is here, it means someone else is listening. And if someone else is listening, we are all already inside someone else’s plan.” Harmain’s gaze dropped to Rory’s hands, where the papers lay—unfolded, the sigil sketches visible in the lamplight, a map of what Rory had guarded. The female newcomer blinked once, as if to remind herself not to overreact, and then spoke. “Rory, you know what happens when your enemies learn the edges of your circle. You know I’m here to stop them from learning any more than they already have.” Harmain’s words were careful, even coaxing, a voice designed to pry and yet not provoke. Rory looked from Harmain to Lucien, then to the cat, whose ears pricked at the tension, whose tail swished with a hunter’s rhythm. The room didn’t contain all of them; it held a battery of histories—each charged with a different possibility, each warning of what would happen if the wrong syllable slipped. Lucien finally spoke, the words slow, almost fond in a way that did not belong to their current reality. “We are a triangle again, it seems. One vertex is a danger you did not anticipate, Rory. Another is the friend who understands that danger all too well. And Harmain—she’s the wild card we forgot to count.” Harmain met his gaze with a quiet, chilling smile. “Count me in, if only to remind you what you keep buried when you pretend you don’t care.” Rory’s breath steadied, and the papers trembled slightly in her hand—not with fear, but with a fierce, stubborn resolve. She met Harmain’s gaze with something like steel. “If you’re here to re-arrange the chessboard, you’ll do it on my terms. If not, you’ll leave this flat and pretend nothing happened.” The words hung in the air, heavy with consequence. For a heartbeat, the room seemed to vibrate with the possibility of swords drawn and secrets spilled. Then, with a sudden, almost absurd, quietness, the three of them—Rory, Lucien, Harmain—stood in the small space and watched the door as if the door itself might reveal a way out or a means to sever the thread that connected them all. A sound shattered the fragile balance—a hard, metallic clink from down the hall, followed by a muffled cry that did not belong to any of them. The floor vibrated with a low thrumming that rose and fell with a rhythm that felt almost like a warning. The three of them froze, minds clicking into action, bodies already moving. Rory’s hand shot out, grabbing the wooden chair for cover, her other hand lifting instinctively toward the edge of the table where the sigil notes lay. The cat sprang from the doorway, a grey blur that slipped between legs and skidded under the sofa, tail flicking like a metronome of danger. Lucien’s cane snapped up with unsettling speed, the blade glinting once in the lamp’s harsh glow as he angled himself between Rory and whatever was coming. Harmain pressed back, one hand on the wall as if bracing for impact, but her eyes didn’t leave Rory’s face, a taut invitation to a fight neither of them were prepared to admit they wanted. The corridor door slammed with a force that shook the plaster, and a shadowed figure burst through, not with the abrupt, flashy entrance of an assassin but with the measured, practiced poise of someone who knew precisely where to step and how to strike. A weapon flashed, catching the edge of the lamplight and turning the room into a sudden theatre of danger. Rory moved first, a lunge that wasn’t simply defensive but decisively offensive, the papers in her hand gone now, her body turning in a fluid motion to shield the others. The room narrowed to a single piano key of action: a reach, a parry, a misstep that would end badly for someone in the room. Lucien spoke in a low, controlled tone, his cane moving in a precise arc, the blade never leaving its sheath. “Take the shot, and you’ll answer to me, Harmain. You’ll answer to Rory.” The language was a threat, yes, but also a promise that they wouldn’t do this alone. The intruder—woman or man, it didn’t matter right then—lunged again, and the fight erupted in a choreography of limbs and shadow, a dance older than the room itself. Rory struck with the quiet certainty of someone who had learned to survive by not leaving choices unmade, not allowing the situations to degrade into chaos. Harmain moved with a feral grace, a wild card who made every motion count, every breath a calculation. Ptolemy, cornered behind the sofa, hissed the kind of warning that made the air feel suddenly colder, a memory of a life Rory had tried to forget, a life that had almost killed them once before. The sound of leather, the rasp of metal, the sharp crack of a ceramic mug turned to shards on the floor—these small sounds stitched the bigger picture together: this wasn’t a simple intruder; this was a page torn from a book they all thought sealed. Rory found a moment of clarity in the confusion: she had protections—sigils on parchment, notes in a language only a few understood, and the raw, stubborn will that had kept her alive through more bad nights than she cared to admit. She bent, picked up a fragment of the sigil, and pressed it into the palm of her hand, the rough edges biting into her skin as if to remind her of what she’d sworn to protect. “Stand down,” she commanded, voice firm, a note of command carved into it. The words sliced through the noise of scuffles, into the heavy breath of the room, into the eyes of the attacker who paused just long enough to reconsider. Lucien moved again, not to strike but to intercept, a practiced baton in a malevolent symphony. He spoke softly, almost gently, a language only Rory and Harmain might catch if they listened with a different ear. “This has to end without more blood, Harmain. We need the truth, not a body count.” Harmain’s lips pressed into a thin line, and she stepped back, the weapon lowering with a reluctant, grudging precision. The room’s tension loosened by an fraction, enough for Rory to push away from the wall and approach the smoke-thick centre of the room where the altercation had erupted. The intruder—whoever they were—stood still, weapon lowered, but not forgotten. The silence stretched again, heavy with the knowledge that there were more players in this game than they had anticipated. Rory looked from Harmain to Lucien, then to the intruder, then back to the ceiling as if anchoring herself to something far above the floor’s drama. The corridor door shuddered once more, a warning, or perhaps the prelude to another wave of violence. The sound of a second boot on the carpet, heavier, more deliberate, reached the doorway and a new silhouette filled the frame, taller than the others, moving with the measured inevitability of someone who no longer feared the lines drawn in the sand. Silence collapsed into a taut hum. The three of them—Rory, Lucien, Harmain—turned as one to meet the new presence, the cat retreating into the shadows behind the sofa with a low, wary oath of survival. And then, with the suddenness of a closing door, the room settled into a stillness that felt unnatural, almost holy in its danger. The new visitor stepped forward, eyes fixed on Rory with a purpose she could interpret even through the fog of adrenaline. The air hummed with a new tension, a promise that the end of this night would not be quiet, not with the history between them burning bright in the lamp’s glare, and the future’s shape pressing in from the doorway like a blade in the seam of a coat. The last sight was a spark, a glint of metal at the edge of a hand, a whispered oath that hadn’t been spoken aloud. And as the figures stood in the shrinking light, ready for what would come next, the door beyond the room’s threshold remained the only constant, a stubborn barrier between sanctuary and a fate that would not be denied. The moment stretched, not long enough to count, and then something gave way—the click of a lock, a stifled breath, a weathered grin that wasn’t here a moment ago. The noise grew, a chorus that suggested the night itself had decided to intervene, to play its own hand in a game that had begun on a doorstep and would not end until every truth had bled free. No more words. Only actions. The room charged, again, with the old, dangerous electricity of what had drawn them together and then torn them apart. A clock might have ticked, but this moment belonged to the hands that moved and the bodies that reacted, to the old debts that demanded payment and the new consequences that would not wait.
created_at"2026-02-19T03:49:01.411Z" 2/19/2026, 3:49:01 AM
model"openai/gpt-5-nano-2025-08-07"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency2695
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time61240
tokens_prompt4556
tokens_completion6564
native_tokens_prompt4075
native_tokens_completion8653
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning3904
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.00366495
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"50329d77-04e1-4979-a184-c33030289476"
id"resp_015104300fbd0db9016996882d7ee88195bf275cddc3a2a387"
is_byokfalse
latency116
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5-nano-2025-08-07"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771472941-97neVUrF5UjlTEPkBJLs"
upstream_id"resp_015104300fbd0db9016996882d7ee88195bf275cddc3a2a387"
total_cost0.00366495
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
92.86% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags28
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"he finally said [finally]"
1"Rory said more [more]"
2"he said finally [finally]"
dialogueSentences46
tagDensity0.609
leniency1
rawRatio0.107
effectiveRatio0.107
88.05% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3766
totalAiIsmAdverbs9
found
0
adverb"slightly"
count2
1
adverb"suddenly"
count2
2
adverb"barely above a whisper"
count1
3
adverb"softly"
count2
4
adverb"precisely"
count1
5
adverb"gently"
count1
highlights
0"slightly"
1"suddenly"
2"barely above a whisper"
3"softly"
4"precisely"
5"gently"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
37.60% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3766
totalAiIsms47
found
0
word"gleaming"
count1
1
word"echo"
count1
2
word"measured"
count3
3
word"familiar"
count3
4
word"charged"
count3
5
word"flicked"
count3
6
word"trembled"
count2
7
word"flickered"
count2
8
word"sanctuary"
count3
9
word"predator"
count1
10
word"glint"
count2
11
word"silence"
count4
12
word"tension"
count5
13
word"weight"
count1
14
word"whisper"
count1
15
word"imposing"
count2
16
word"dance"
count3
17
word"calculating"
count1
18
word"chilling"
count1
19
word"resolve"
count1
20
word"shattered"
count1
21
word"vibrated"
count1
22
word"glinting"
count1
23
word"symphony"
count1
highlights
0"gleaming"
1"echo"
2"measured"
3"familiar"
4"charged"
5"flicked"
6"trembled"
7"flickered"
8"sanctuary"
9"predator"
10"glint"
11"silence"
12"tension"
13"weight"
14"whisper"
15"imposing"
16"dance"
17"calculating"
18"chilling"
19"resolve"
20"shattered"
21"vibrated"
22"glinting"
23"symphony"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches3
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count2
1
label"hung in the air"
count1
highlights
0"eyes narrowed"
1"hung in the air"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells2
narrationSentences153
matches
0"t in fear"
1"t with fear"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount3
narrationSentences153
filterMatches
0"feel"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"tried to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences169
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen51
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3728
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions37
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
50.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions93
wordCount3142
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity1.24
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Lucien20
Moreau1
Eva2
Flat2
Ptolemy4
Carter2
London1
Rory39
Laila1
Aurora2
Malphora1
Silence3
Harmain15
persons
0"Lucien"
1"Moreau"
2"Eva"
3"Flat"
4"Ptolemy"
5"Carter"
6"Rory"
7"Laila"
8"Aurora"
9"Malphora"
10"Silence"
11"Harmain"
places
0"London"
globalScore0.879
windowScore0.5
0.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences146
glossingSentenceCount15
matches
0"sounded like a prelude"
1"as if tasting something bitter and familiar at once"
2"quite electricity and not quite heat—an old static cling of history, like a room charged with a memory they both pretended didn’t mean anything anymore"
3"not quite heat—an old static cling of history, like a room charged with a memory they both pretended didn’t mean anything anymore"
4"as if weighing a decision that could tilt the gravity of the room"
5"tasted like danger seasoned with a dash o"
6"quite a refusal and not quite a consent either"
7"not quite a consent either"
8"looked like research notes; a leather-bou"
9"not quite believe but felt compelled to utter anyway"
10"It was as if the room exhaled at the same time, the quiet breath of a flat that suddenly felt smaller"
11"not quite a shout but a sword unsheathed in a dark room"
12"sounded like steel being sharpened"
13"as if weighing the jar of secrets that sat between them all"
14"something like steel"
15"as if bracing for impact, but her eyes didn’t leave Rory’s face, a taut invitation to a fight neither of them were prepared to admit they wanted"
16"as if anchoring herself to something far above the floor’s drama"
0.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches12
per1kWords3.219
wordCount3728
matches
0"not enough to threaten but enough to remind her he could"
1"not quite believe but felt compelled to utter anyway"
2"not just a visitor with a blade in his pocket but a liability in someone else’s room"
3"not a smile but something"
4"not quite a shout but a sword unsheathed in a dark room"
5"not in the theatrical sense but as a practical warning"
6"not with a dramatic stride but with the careful, almost clinical steps of someone who knew"
7"not in fear but in a sudden, sharp recognition"
8"not imposing but present, a quiet insistence"
9"not with fear, but with a fierce, stubborn resolve"
10"not with the abrupt, flashy entrance of an assassin but with the measured, practiced poise of someone who knew preci"
11"not to strike but to intercept, a practiced baton in a malevolent symphony"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences169
matches(empty)
49.40% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs69
mean54.03
std17.45
cv0.323
sampleLengths
061
185
216
360
443
567
658
733
845
976
1076
1157
124
1370
14103
1537
1634
1725
1866
1940
2072
2142
2249
2327
2458
2547
2662
2735
2861
2961
3041
3139
3263
3343
3478
3569
3654
3756
3854
3948
4023
4162
4251
4340
4444
4552
4656
4727
4850
4968
96.09% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount4
totalSentences153
matches
0"being sharpened"
1"were prepared"
2"were—stood"
3"been spoken"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs480
matches
0"was coming"
1"were listening"
2"was testing"
3"was coming"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount28
semicolonCount6
flaggedSentences22
totalSentences169
ratio0.13
matches
0"Her blue eyes narrowed to slits as she took in the echo of his presence—the precise suit, the gloss of his hair, the peculiar, dangerous calm that always rode on him like a tailored overcoat."
1"The nickname—Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora—slid through his mouth as if tasting something bitter and familiar at once."
2"The air between them crackled with something that wasn’t quite electricity and not quite heat—an old static cling of history, like a room charged with a memory they both pretended didn’t mean anything anymore."
3"Lucien’s eyes flickered, and for a second the demon-blood in him—if one believed the whispers—showed itself in the narrow crease by his right temple, a tiny, private tremor that betrayed his control."
4"He looked around the room again, cataloguing the fragments of Rory’s life laid out in vignettes: a kitchen counter crowded with jars and what looked like research notes; a leather-bound notebook half filled with scrawled equations and sketches of sigils; a mug stained with dark tea, cooled to room temperature."
5"The room wasn’t just a flat; it was a map of Rory’s mind, half-embedded in every object that lay within reach."
6"“Tell me what you’re after, and you might find you’re not just a visitor with a blade in his pocket but a liability in someone else’s room.” Her eyes glowed a little brighter; the blue seemed to sharpen, the way ice can cut when albedo is wrong."
7"Then a sound—a soft, almost negligent scuff from the hallway beyond the door—made both their postures snap taut."
8"The hallway light flickered and there was a scuff again—the sound of shoes that did not want to belong to the height of a human step."
9"The door at the far end of the corridor—the door to the main room that led to Eva’s Flat’s single string of mysteries—creaked with a reluctant sigh, as if someone was testing whether the locks would hold."
10"The name—Harmain—dropped like a stone into the room, and Rory’s breath hitched in a way that did not go unnoticed by either man."
11"Harmain’s gaze dropped to Rory’s hands, where the papers lay—unfolded, the sigil sketches visible in the lamplight, a map of what Rory had guarded."
12"The room didn’t contain all of them; it held a battery of histories—each charged with a different possibility, each warning of what would happen if the wrong syllable slipped."
13"Rory’s breath steadied, and the papers trembled slightly in her hand—not with fear, but with a fierce, stubborn resolve."
14"Then, with a sudden, almost absurd, quietness, the three of them—Rory, Lucien, Harmain—stood in the small space and watched the door as if the door itself might reveal a way out or a means to sever the thread that connected them all."
15"A sound shattered the fragile balance—a hard, metallic clink from down the hall, followed by a muffled cry that did not belong to any of them."
16"The intruder—woman or man, it didn’t matter right then—lunged again, and the fight erupted in a choreography of limbs and shadow, a dance older than the room itself."
17"The sound of leather, the rasp of metal, the sharp crack of a ceramic mug turned to shards on the floor—these small sounds stitched the bigger picture together: this wasn’t a simple intruder; this was a page torn from a book they all thought sealed."
18"Rory found a moment of clarity in the confusion: she had protections—sigils on parchment, notes in a language only a few understood, and the raw, stubborn will that had kept her alive through more bad nights than she cared to admit."
19"The intruder—whoever they were—stood still, weapon lowered, but not forgotten."
20"The three of them—Rory, Lucien, Harmain—turned as one to meet the new presence, the cat retreating into the shadows behind the sofa with a low, wary oath of survival."
21"The moment stretched, not long enough to count, and then something gave way—the click of a lock, a stifled breath, a weathered grin that wasn’t here a moment ago."
98.38% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount3178
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount133
adverbRatio0.04185022026431718
lyAdverbCount27
lyAdverbRatio0.008495909376966647
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences169
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences169
mean22.06
std10.3
cv0.467
sampleLengths
017
120
224
319
435
531
67
79
85
940
1015
1125
1218
133
1430
1534
1615
1725
1818
1918
2015
2127
2218
2312
2425
2531
268
2714
2842
2920
3010
3123
3224
334
3412
3523
3635
3732
3850
3921
4027
4110
4214
4320
4425
4521
469
4736
4815
4925
40.53% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats16
diversityRatio0.24260355029585798
totalSentences169
uniqueOpeners41
66.23% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount3
totalSentences151
matches
0"Then a sound—a soft, almost"
1"Then the figure emerged, not"
2"Then, with a sudden, almost"
ratio0.02
95.50% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount47
totalSentences151
matches
0"He stood just inside Eva’s"
1"Her blue eyes narrowed to"
2"She hadn’t expected to see"
3"she said, level as a"
4"He didn’t answer at first."
5"He studied the room as"
6"he finally said, voice smooth"
7"Her lips tightened."
8"She set the papers down"
9"His amber and black eyes"
10"He tilted his head, letting"
11"Her stance shifted, a dancer’s"
12"Her voice steadied into something"
13"She cut herself off, counting"
14"He studied her for a"
15"he said finally, and the"
16"Her shoulders settled from their"
17"Her voice softened at the"
18"He looked around the room"
19"he replied, the words precise,"
ratio0.311
0.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount142
totalSentences151
matches
0"The door snapped back on"
1"He stood just inside Eva’s"
2"The cat, Ptolemy, shot a"
3"Aurora Carter watched him from"
4"Her blue eyes narrowed to"
5"She hadn’t expected to see"
6"she said, level as a"
7"The word sat in the"
8"He didn’t answer at first."
9"He studied the room as"
10"The cane clicked once against"
11"he finally said, voice smooth"
12"The nickname—Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter,"
13"Her lips tightened."
14"She set the papers down"
15"The air between them crackled"
16"Lucien stepped forward, gliding with"
17"His amber and black eyes"
18"The cat hissed once, a"
19"Rory said more to the"
ratio0.94
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences151
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences107
technicalSentenceCount28
matches
0"He studied the room as if it were a map of enemies and alliances, eyes lingering on the three deadbolts on the front door, on the chalked circles scrawled near …"
1"The nickname—Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora—slid through his mouth as if tasting something bitter and familiar at once."
2"The air between them crackled with something that wasn’t quite electricity and not quite heat—an old static cling of history, like a room charged with a memory …"
3"His amber and black eyes flicked to Ptolemy, who lay in the doorway between kitchen and living room, ears flat, tail swishing with earned caution."
4"Lucien’s eyes flickered, and for a second the demon-blood in him—if one believed the whispers—showed itself in the narrow crease by his right temple, a tiny, pr…"
5"The cat emitted a low, warning chuff, as if to remind both of them that even old loyalties could be tested by a predator’s presence."
6"Rory’s jaw tightened and she moved a step closer to the table, as if the physical proximity could anchor her from the tremor in her hands."
7"Ptolemy padded closer to Rory’s ankle, rubbing beneath her calf with a soft, insistent contact that asked for attention, a small shield against the growing tens…"
8"The door at the far end of the corridor—the door to the main room that led to Eva’s Flat’s single string of mysteries—creaked with a reluctant sigh, as if someo…"
9"Then the figure emerged, not with a dramatic stride but with the careful, almost clinical steps of someone who knew how to move in a space without ever becoming…"
10"A woman’s silhouette, tall but not imposing, wearing a coat that swallowed its wearer, stepped into the glow of the living room lamp."
11"The newcomer wore nothing familiar on her face, but the intersection of danger and familiarity was a familiar dance to Rory, a dance she’d hoped to avoid after …"
12"The interloper paused, letting the door close softly behind her as if she preferred the space to have less noise, less audience."
13"Harmain’s eyes flicked to Lucien with a cool assessment, and then to Rory as if weighing the jar of secrets that sat between them all."
14"Lucien stepped closer to Rory, not imposing but present, a quiet insistence that he would not be sidelined by someone who had no trust in their past."
15"Then, with a sudden, almost absurd, quietness, the three of them—Rory, Lucien, Harmain—stood in the small space and watched the door as if the door itself might…"
16"A sound shattered the fragile balance—a hard, metallic clink from down the hall, followed by a muffled cry that did not belong to any of them."
17"The cat sprang from the doorway, a grey blur that slipped between legs and skidded under the sofa, tail flicking like a metronome of danger."
18"The corridor door slammed with a force that shook the plaster, and a shadowed figure burst through, not with the abrupt, flashy entrance of an assassin but with…"
19"Rory moved first, a lunge that wasn’t simply defensive but decisively offensive, the papers in her hand gone now, her body turning in a fluid motion to shield t…"
20"Lucien spoke in a low, controlled tone, his cane moving in a precise arc, the blade never leaving its sheath."
21"Rory struck with the quiet certainty of someone who had learned to survive by not leaving choices unmade, not allowing the situations to degrade into chaos."
22"Rory looked from Harmain to Lucien, then to the intruder, then back to the ceiling as if anchoring herself to something far above the floor’s drama."
23"And then, with the suddenness of a closing door, the room settled into a stillness that felt unnatural, almost holy in its danger."
24"The air hummed with a new tension, a promise that the end of this night would not be quiet, not with the history between them burning bright in the lamp’s glare…"
25"And as the figures stood in the shrinking light, ready for what would come next, the door beyond the room’s threshold remained the only constant, a stubborn bar…"
26"The moment stretched, not long enough to count, and then something gave way—the click of a lock, a stifled breath, a weathered grin that wasn’t here a moment ag…"
27"The noise grew, a chorus that suggested the night itself had decided to intervene, to play its own hand in a game that had begun on a doorstep and would not end…"
17.86% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags28
uselessAdditionCount6
matches
0"She set, as though they might scorch the surface if she pressed too hard"
1"Rory said more, but the words carried, anyway"
2"He studied, as if weighing a decision that could tilt the gravity of the room"
3"he said finally, and the words tasted like danger seasoned with a dash of old ache"
4"Rory said, not unkindly, a thread of dry humour crossing her voice"
5"she managed, her voice a cool, clear line"
84.78% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags16
fancyCount3
fancyTags
0"he conceded (concede)"
1"he whispered (whisper)"
2"she drawled (drawl)"
dialogueSentences46
tagDensity0.348
leniency0.696
rawRatio0.188
effectiveRatio0.13
67.2424%