Run: 2026-02-19-01KHTY71HC1DC8417YVXW7PBRB

Run Details

Duration:
1m 23s
Cost:
$0.003871
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Fantasy genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>

Model response

AI
The arch sighed and Nyx split the shadows like a blade of night, guiding us deeper while the walls breathed in around us. Rory, keep close, the pendant pulsed against my chest, a warm, stubborn heartbeat that didn’t belong to this place. “Keep quiet,” Nyx whispered, their voice a thread of wind through our coats. “The seams hear more than you think.” I pressed a gloved hand to the Heartstone Pendant, felt the crimson glow spread through the silver chain, a tiny sun trapped at my throat. The stone warmed, then warmed again, as if cupping a memory I didn’t have. The corridor opened into a chamber grown from bone and glass, a hive carved by unseen hands. Vines hung from the ceiling, luminescent sap trickling in slow, deliberate threads, and every so often a veinlit bulb twitched as if the chamber itself—alive—was blinking at us. The floor beneath us was not floor so much as a field of glassy tiles that hummed under our boots. Each step sent a soft resonance up my calves, a faint choir of chimes that died before they could become sound. The air tasted like cold copper and rain that had never fallen. The Fae-Forged Blade hummed against my palm, the moonsilver edge barely warm to the touch, a chill that promised it could sever more than metal. Isolde Varga appeared ahead of us, her silver hair catching the pale glow of the sap. She moved as if the grove itself had learned her footsteps and bowed to her presence. The Seer’s pale lavender eyes flickered with something like frostlight. “Three paths, three shadows,” she murmured, eyes narrowing on a runnel of light that stitched itself across the chamber. “The Veil remembers us, or pretends not to. Choose with care, child of the law and the night.” “I’m not here to choose a path for you,” I replied, though the blade in my hand felt heavier with every breath. The voices in the walls hadn’t spoken yet, but I could feel their curiosity, a thousand little teeth gnashing in the plaster. Nyx drifted closer to a column that looked less a column and more a tether of shadow, a hinge between this world and whatever whispered beyond. They pressed a finger of fog to the cold surface and the shadow peeled back, revealing a corridor lined with doors that did not exist in any other map I’d studied. Each door reflected a scene—snatches of a life I might lead if I turned this way or that. “Judgement calls,” Nyx said softly. “Every door remembers a choice.” “Let’s not pick blindly,” I said, stepping after Isolde as she moved toward a dais carved with sigils in a language that hummed when you breathed it in. The dais rose from the floor like a shallow tide, and on it lay a crystal cube, smooth as a moonless night. The cube pulsed with a heartbeat of its own, a pale glow that throbbed in sync with the pendant’s warmth. “Dismantle the wards,” Isolde intoned, not looking at us but at the cube as if it were a dangerous animal she knew how to calm. “What glows to truth may break what binds.” The cube’s light shifted as if listening. I raised the Blade, the edge catching the glow and sharpening it into a razor of light against the dim. Wards carved into the dais shimmered then peeled away, releasing a scent of rain on stone and something older, like forgotten meals and smoky embers. The chamber behind us—a shadow-stitched corridor—twitched in sympathy, as if the place itself could smell fear and hunger. The Veil, yes—the place existed because it desired to be found only by the brave and the reckless, and we had come uninvited, with purpose and a mettle that wouldn’t let go. “Listen,” Nyx breathed, their voice a soft crack in the air. “Something follows.” We moved, and the world shifted under our boots. Time pressed into itself, as if we had stepped into the pocket Isolde had warned about—the hour inside stretching to fill what seemed like days outside. The sap-lit vines lengthened and the walls broadened into a cathedral of living stone. The air thickened with scent: iron, resin, something like honey that stung, too sweet to trust. “Tell me you feel that,” I said, voice barely above a whisper, though the chamber heard me loud as a bell. Isolde’s gaze flickered toward a row of doors again, then to me. “The truth wears a mask, and masks hide their teeth,” she said, smiling in a way that didn’t reach her eyes. “The gate desires a toll.” Rory, keep focus, I told myself. I was here to find a way through, not to become a story about my own fear. And fear needed the truth to become something else—a power, a plan, a flame that could burn away what bound us to this place. We crossed the chamber on a mosaic of squares that clicked like knuckles under a careful hand. Each step produced a faint note, a different tone in a melody I couldn’t hear in my head but could feel in the bones of the place. The Fae-Forged Blade moved easily, tracing along a wall’s sigils with a light touch, as if it were born to listen to what the runes tried not to tell. The corridors branching off the main hall bent and stretched, shifting as if the place itself reconfigured its joints when we weren’t looking. Nyx drifted between the columns, shadow-wings brushing the stone as they consulted the other doors with their patient, whisper-thin whisper. “Moonlight will not help us here,” Isolde noted dryly, stepping alongside me as we approached another arch. The arch was not an arch so much as a maw, carved with teeth of old stone. The teeth seemed to breathe, slow and deliberate, as if the arch were tasting the air for us. The Heartstone Pendant pulsed against my chest, steady and insistent, and for a moment I thought I heard it speak in a language older than the runes on the dais. The warmth grew a fraction warmer, and I forced a breath that didn’t tremble. A sound rose from the depths of the place—a metallic sigh, then a chorus of soft clacks that resembled footsteps not of men but of something that had learned to mimic them. Nyx paused, shadow coiling into a more solid shape. “They’re watching,” Nyx said, almost conversational, though the air thickened with tension. “Not eyes human. More like perceptions sliding along the walls, tasting us.” A door to the left flickered and did not stay open. We paused as the flicker became a whisper and then a solid arch, a doorway we might pass through if we believed enough in what we could not yet see. The blade’s glow intensified, a pale halo around the edge, and the pendant warmed again, sending a small, bright tremor of heat through my fingers. “Isolde,” I whispered, “which door?” The Seer tilted her head, eyes narrowing into a line of frostlight. “The one that asks what you already know but cannot name. Listen for the answer that makes you brave enough to walk through.” She did not point to a door; she spoke to a moment. The doors stood in a row, their handles smooth as bone, each glinting with a field of runes. The first reflected our faces with a curious insistence; the second showed us aged, withered and wiser; the third altered us into silhouettes we’d never become. The fourth door, the one nearest the dragon’s mouth arch, appeared to be barely a door at all, just a sliver of air that looked ready to swallow us whole if we stepped through. Rory spoke first, quick and practical, the sort of thing I’d expect from a person who’d run through deliveries and danger with the same stubborn pace. “We test the wards first. If that cube can dissolve them, we can take this further. If not… we come back to it with more light.” Nyx’s voice came as a soft wind along my ear. “Light hurts in this place. Shadows listen and learn. We go with what we know, not what the room tells us to fear.” Isolde’s answer came in a fragment, a riddle that sounded almost musical. “The door that asks a question answers only to truth. The truth comes with a price, and price is paid in fear, courage, or both.” We moved then, as a unit with a plan rather than a rush. The cube’s glow seemed to respond to the blade’s edge, smoothing the runes as if the weapon had coaxed a stubborn animal into following us. We chose a door—an approach that felt more like a dare than a decision—and stepped through. The air on the other side became something else entirely. It carried a scent I didn’t recognise as air at all but as the breath of something ancient moved by. The ceiling above us opened into a lattice of dark, star-work that wasn’t stars so much as living questions. The space inside stretched, not with distance but with memory; it remembered our footsteps, our breath, the sound of Isolde’s whisper on the edge of hearing. We found ourselves in a chamber that seemed to be carved from the night itself—an amphitheatre of black glass and pale sap, where every surface reflected a version of us more than once and in more ways than one. Nyx slipped along the margins of the room and then pressed into a shadow that leaned forward as if listening to our breath. The Shadow did not merely exist here; it adapted. “You see it,” Isolde said softly, almost to herself, though I could feel the truth of her words sharpen the air between us. “The room is a memory of the path we chose, a gallery of futures. Look—every reflection shows a different consequence of our decision.” In the glassy surfaces we saw ourselves: Rory as a prosecutor, as a warrior, as a wanderer in a city of light and violence; Isolde as a figure standing calmly, a thread of prophecies trailing behind her; Nyx as a silhouette that flashed between forms, a chorus of whispers that never settled. The Heartstone Pendant’s glow intensified each time a reflection moved, and for a heartbeat I thought I could hear the pendant counting time in a language that wasn’t meant for mortal ears. A soft chime pricked the air as one of the reflections stepped out of the glass and became real. A figure formed at the far end of the chamber—a thing not human, with a mouth full of jagged, glass-like teeth and eyes that burned with the amber of heated metal. It moved with a hunger that wasn’t merely appetite but an old, patient hunger that sought to consume stories, memories, and perhaps the people who carried them. The figure did not speak with words. It spoke in breath and the tremor of stone. The wall behind us sighed and the runes there glowed softly, as if acknowledging a treaty being broken. The creature’s presence felt like a wall collapsing inward, and in that moment the chamber itself responded—each mirror surface rippled as if a fish gliding through water, the room tilting a fraction, gravity bending in a way that didn’t make sense but felt true. The blade in my hand grew colder, the glow around its edge turning tangibly blue, as if the moon itself had blown a frosty exhalation into the room. Nyx stepped forward into the shallow pool of reflected night, their shadow no longer a veil but a substance. They spoke not to the thing, but to us, and their voice carried a hiss of wind and rain and the distant thunder of a city in the grip of a storm. “Close your eyes only if you must. Open them if you want to survive what follows. The room is listening for your fear as much as your courage.” Isolde inclined her head, a soft, almost amused tilt that did not reach her lips. “Truth wears a mask, and that mask has teeth. The more you fear, the louder it speaks.” The amber-eyed thing began to advance, a crawling hunger that brushed the outer edges of our perception. The room tightened around us, walls bending in a lazy, merciless squeeze. The Heartstone Pendant pulsed violently now, warm heat pricking through the fabric of my coat, flooding my senses with a memory of something I couldn’t name—perhaps the Hel portals or a hunger that wasn’t mine but claimed me anyway. “Focus on the truth you carry,” Isolde instructed, voice steady as if the garden in Richmond Park still waited for her to walk its paths. She glanced at me with a cryptic half-smile. “The Gate requires a toll paid in the coin of certainty.” Rory’s breath hitched, but she did not hesitate. “We came this far. We do not turn back.” She moved, short steps, toward the corridor echoing with the creature’s approach. The blade swept in a clean arc, cutting through a shimmer of warding that shimmered like liquid silver around the creature’s path. The monster staggered back as if struck by a blade of ice, its teeth clattering with a sound that resembled iron filings spilling across stone. The spectres in the mirrors hissed and retreated at the edge, leaving a clearer path to the far wall, where a single door hung in mid-air, framed by the same runic lattice that had opened the dais earlier. A choked breath rose in my throat as the Heartstone Pendant’s warmth spiked, then steadied, a pulse that begged to be believed. “Courage, not bravado,” Nyx murmured, almost kindly. They stepped closer to me, a shadow that did not fear the fear in the air. “The truth is not loud here. It is a whisper that remembers your name when you forget yours.” I looked down at the pendant again, and for a moment I saw—not a stone, but a memory. A memory of a boy who had once claimed I would never make it, of corridors that seemed to close behind me when I chased something I couldn’t name, of a fling at a life that didn’t belong to me. The memory burned away as quickly as it appeared, leaving me with a sharp, clean resolve. The door—this one not a door but a hinge of air—swung inward as if inviting the three of us to step through. The night beyond was not night but a different night, a different seam of existence where the stars breathed and the ground remembered the old debts. Nyx pressed into the doorway first, slipping into the gap between dimensions as easily as a shadow slips between two lampposts. I followed, blade raised, the pendant’s glow bright and intimate against my chest. The space beyond was a garden suspended in the void, a courtyard of gravity that bent like water. It smelled of salt and distant storms, with a taste of iron at the back of the tongue. The ground bore patterns—constellations drawn in raised, pale glass that felt warm beneath my gloves. The air vibrated with a soft, musical hum. It wasn’t wind; it was the place itself singing, a lullaby that held you still enough to listen and brave enough to walk. We moved as a trio, a careful line through the astral garden. The Fae-Forged Blade’s glow cast a dew-like shimmer on the glass-paths, turning the courtyard into a moving mosaic of moonsilver and shadow. The Heartstone Pendant continued its patient warmth, not nagging but guiding us toward the centre where an immense arch stood, carved with a spiderweb of sigils that seemed to breathe. “Here,” Isolde breathed, stepping to the arch. “This is the heart of the Veil’s memory, the place where paths cross and old bargains reside.” The arch did not look like a doorway to a place of horror but rather like a gate to something merciful and terrible at once. It pulsed with a steady radiance, as if the place itself was listening to the three of us and preparing to decide whether we were worthy of entry. Rory reached out first, fingers brushing the arch’s surface as if she expected to feel a pulse under the skin. The sigils flared briefly, a signal of consent, and then the arch opened with a sigh that sounded like old timber giving way to the inevitable. “No turning back now,” Rory said, a tight line to her mouth but a spark in her eyes. “If this is a memory, we take the memory and make it ours, not the other way around.” Nyx’s response was a soft, wry whisper. “We borrow what belongs to us already.” We stepped through. What followed was a torrent of senses—too swift to name, too vivid to forget. The space flipped through colours in seconds, a montage of scenes that hurtled past: a banquet hall on the other side of a portal, a street in a city I’d never visited, a quiet library lined with eyes that watched us as if we were pages in a book they forgot to finish. The three of us held our ground, bodies aligned as if we’d trained for this moment a thousand times. And then, as if the place could not bear three living hearts without asking for something in return, a coiled thing of shadow rose from the floor in front of us, a creature that did not exist in any map I’d ever trusted. Its body was a wisp of smoke with edges that glittered like frost. It spoke in a language that sounded like glass breaking softly, a hiss of teeth and wind and hunger. The shadow-thing angled toward Isolde, who did not flinch. Her gaze did not waver from its impossible eyes, and her mouth moved in a way that suggested she was translating the information of fear into some kind of ritual. The words came from no single throat but from that shared place where the mind meets the forest of omens. “The veil accepts only those who barter with their truth,” she intoned. “What will you give to exit this place alive?” Rory stepped between us and the creature, the blade raised, the pendant warm against her chest. “We give nothing but what we came to take: knowledge and a way home.” The creature hissed, the sound like metal dragged across stone, and threw a wave of heat that made the air tremble. The glow of the blade flickered; Nyx’s shadow thickened and then split into a hundred frayed threads, each thread hanging temptingly in the light as if they might obscure or reveal what lay ahead. The creature charged with a sudden speed that belied its shadowy frame. The archway behind us shivered as if a dragon had breathed through it. We met it head-on, the blade singing against something invisible that fought to hold us, the pendant’s warmth escalating into a fierce blaze that felt almost like magic. “Hold the line,” I barked, trusting the steel in my hand more than my own nerves. The Fae blade cut a path through the creature’s wisp-thin body, leaving behind a trail of smoke that smelled faintly of honey and iron. The creature reeled, then steadied and pressed forward again, hunger in each wavering step. “Careful,” Isolde warned, lifting a hand as if to cast a spell, but instead her fingers traced a sigil in the air that glowed with pale light, a guiding thread rather than a weapon. “Direct the truth, not the fear.” The arch beside us shuddered, and the space grew hotter, as if the place itself were turning a corner toward something more dangerous. The Heartstone Pendant grew brighter, a crimson beacon that seemed to pull at the shadow creature like a child pulls a kite toward storm clouds. Nyx moved, a dart of living shadow, slipping around the creature’s flank and striking where the light was weakest—where the room’s own fear fed the thing. They poured more shade into the corridor, weaving a corridor of night that pinched the creature’s breath and slowed it, the way a hunter fans a fleeing stag. “We press forward,” Rory said, voice steady, even as the ground hummed and the air grew denser with the weight of the Veil’s memory. The three of us advanced in a tight arc toward the arch, the glow around the blade thickening into a pale corona. The shadow-creature faltered for a breath, then lunged again, a black wave trying to swallow us whole. The corridor contracted and opened, contracted and opened, as if we were running through a living bellows. The arch loomed ahead, a mouth that promised both entrance and erasure. The creature lunged once more, a mouthful of smoke and hunger snapping toward Rory’s shoulder. In that instant, a decision crystallised in me as sharply as the blade’s cold edge. I ignored the fear that prickled at the back of my neck, ignored the way Nyx’s shade quivered at the edges of perception, ignored Isolde’s quiet, almost playful warning, and did what I’d promised myself I wouldn’t do: I trusted the truth. “Listen,” I said, voice firmer than I felt. “We came for memory and doorway, not for profit or fear. We leave with what we came for, not with your debt.” The words felt, in that breath, almost like a spell. The creature froze, the room growing so still that even the distant chimes of the dais seemed to hold their breath. Then the air around us thickened, and a voice—thin as glass and old as a cathedral’s floor—spoke from the arch itself, not from the void beyond but from the vessel of the place’s memory. It spoke in a language that lay just at the edge of comprehension, a syllable at a time that I could almost recognise, and then I understood: the Veil wanted the offer we could not take back. “Truth,” the voice whispered, “is a door with teeth. It demands the life you never named.” The creature surged again, a tremor of heat and shadow. Nyx cleared the last distance with a desperate grace, throwing a cloak of shadow across the beast’s path. The pendant’s glow flared, bright enough to briefly blind the lurking horror and throw everything into stark relief: the three of us, the arch, the living garden, the hungry memory waiting just beyond. Isolde spoke again, her voice a line of frost across warm skin. “The price is paid in courage, child. Not fear.” We locked eyes for a heartbeat, and then Rory stepped forward, blade raised, heart stone burning a quiet, fierce red at her throat. She did not blink. The words around us shifted, as though the Veil itself were listening, judging. The creature—already wounded by the truth we spoke—took one final step toward us and dissolved into the air with a sigh like a sleeping beast exhaling. The arch breathing out, we stepped through into the next moment, which held less of fear and more of something like relief—but relief that would be short-lived. We had crossed into what remained of the Veil’s memory, into a place where the world pressed close enough to touch but kept its secrets just out of reach. The place around us hummed with a quiet that sounded like a library after midnight and a temple after prayer, all at once. The walls were not stone so much as a skin that remembered every touch, every word spoken in the room, every choice made in the corridor from which we had just come. The dais reappeared in a pale, frost-white light, the Heartstone Pendant now a steady glow that seemed to anchor us in time rather than pull us through it. The cube atop the dais—the one that had helped dissolve the wards—sat sealed in its glow, inactive for the moment, as if it too waited to learn whether we were worthy to carry its memory forward or whether we would leave it to rot in a corner of the Veil’s mind. The arch behind us pulsed again, a slow, patient rhythm, as if the place was listening to our chests, counting the cycles of our breath, deciding whether we would stay and listen or walk away with what we knew and forget the rest. “We did not come this far for a trinket,” Isolde murmured, stepping back from the dais and looking toward us with a resolute calm. “We came for the truth that could keep us alive when the next door opens.” Nyx drifted closer to the edge of the room, their silhouette wavering where the shadow met reality. “The Veil shifts. We know this. We move with it, or we are moved by it.” The three of us shared a look that was more a pact than a glance. We were not simply trespassers here; we were seekers, and seekers in a place that rewarded boldness as much as it punished bravado. The exit door—if it was to be found—would come only when we chose to call it by its true name, only when we understood what this memory asked of us in return. And then, without ceremony, the chamber’s glow intensified. A chorus of whispers swelled from every surface—floor, walls, even the glassy ceiling—like a congregation of eyes turning toward us and finally deciding to listen. The Heartstone Pendant pulsed with a booming, almost audible heartbeat that caught in my throat and made the words I wanted to shout snag, stuck in my mouth like a cork. The arch, still open to whatever lay beyond, hummed a question we hadn’t expected to hear in a place that didn’t believe in questions anymore. The question was not a word but a weight. The weight pressed down on us until the floor seemed to give just a fraction, as if the Veil itself were leaning closer to hear our answer. Then the weight lifted as if someone had released a clamp, and the chamber’s eye—its singular, amber gaze—found us again, the memory settling into our bones. The three of us stood close, listening to the gentle, insistent thrum of the pendant, counting heartbeats, counting breaths, counting the old debts we could perhaps repay with what we could still give. We did not speak. We did not hesitate. We moved as one—and the moment Matted itself with possibility—toward the arch that glowed with a pale, patient light. The doorway’s breath came again, a soft exhale of wind across a grave’s quiet mouth, inviting us to step further. And then the floor shook. The tremor did not come as a single thunderclap, but as a thousand teeth grinding in unison, a chorus of voices that rose from the core of the Veil itself. The doorway across the room—no longer a mere threshold but a living thing—shivered, and a silhouette rose from the ground behind it: a figure of horn and shadow, eyes aflame with hunger, a long mouth filled with serrated teeth that seemed to grin even as it threatened to devour us all. The thing moved with a patient, predatory grace, as if it had waited for us to reach this door and now, at last, could take its due. The air turned thick with the echo of a thousand lives, of doors opened and closed, of bargains struck and forgotten. We staggered, but did not falter. The blade was ready. The pendant burned in a bright, defiant red. Nyx’s shadow thickened into lattice-work, a fortress against the hunger that pressed forward. “This is the moment,” I said, and my voice surprised me with its steadiness. “We stand, we fight, we leave with what we came for, or we do not leave at all.” The creature roared, a sound like iron bending, and the chamber answered with a chorus of whispers that rose to a single, terrible note. The Veil had decided to test us, to see whether we were worthy of passing through the door that lay beyond all doors. We met the challenge with the only weapons we possessed: a blade, a heart, and a truth that refused to be silenced. We stepped forward as one, and the next moment—the moment that would either bind us to the Veil or send us screaming back into the ordinary world—was a breath away. The arch's light flared, a flare that caught the room in a blaze of pale gold and red, and a terrible, hungry calm settled over us as the gate began to move, slowly, inexorably, toward accepting our offering. The chapter ends where the moment demands the next leap: with the world tilting, the ground cracking, and the shadowy guardian of the Veil closing in, its amber eyes suddenly locking onto Rory, Nyx, and Isolde as if we had indeed become the memory it sought to keep. The gate’s breath fell upon us like a cold wind, and the three of us braced for what came next, for what would truly be asked of us when the door finally opened wide.
created_at"2026-02-19T12:32:51.255Z" 2/19/2026, 12:32:51 PM
model"openai/gpt-5-nano-2025-08-07"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency6534
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time82433
tokens_prompt5338
tokens_completion8114
native_tokens_prompt4854
native_tokens_completion9070
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning3008
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.0038707
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"50329d77-04e1-4979-a184-c33030289476"
id"resp_0f9fc5c633df803d01699702f367848197bc6fc5772da2adb5"
is_byokfalse
latency190
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5-nano-2025-08-07"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771504371-DVPpdu602X1GvY1uSx0C"
upstream_id"resp_0f9fc5c633df803d01699702f367848197bc6fc5772da2adb5"
total_cost0.0038707
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
86.79% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags26
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"Nyx said softly [softly]"
1"Isolde noted dryly [dryly]"
2"Isolde said softly [softly]"
dialogueSentences53
tagDensity0.491
leniency0.981
rawRatio0.115
effectiveRatio0.113
88.83% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount4923
totalAiIsmAdverbs11
found
0
adverb"softly"
count4
1
adverb"barely above a whisper"
count1
2
adverb"quickly"
count1
3
adverb"sharply"
count1
4
adverb"slowly"
count1
5
adverb"inexorably"
count1
6
adverb"suddenly"
count1
7
adverb"truly"
count1
highlights
0"softly"
1"barely above a whisper"
2"quickly"
3"sharply"
4"slowly"
5"inexorably"
6"suddenly"
7"truly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
36.01% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount4923
totalAiIsms63
found
0
word"pulsed"
count7
1
word"resonance"
count1
2
word"chill"
count1
3
word"footsteps"
count3
4
word"flickered"
count4
5
word"could feel"
count3
6
word"crystal"
count1
7
word"throbbed"
count1
8
word"warmth"
count5
9
word"shimmered"
count2
10
word"whisper"
count7
11
word"mosaic"
count2
12
word"tracing"
count1
13
word"maw"
count1
14
word"depths"
count1
15
word"tension"
count1
16
word"flicker"
count1
17
word"glinting"
count1
18
word"echoing"
count1
19
word"pulse"
count2
20
word"resolve"
count1
21
word"vibrated"
count1
22
word"aligned"
count1
23
word"charged"
count1
24
word"wavering"
count2
25
word"traced"
count1
26
word"beacon"
count1
27
word"weight"
count4
28
word"loomed"
count1
29
word"quivered"
count1
30
word"stark"
count1
31
word"grave"
count1
32
word"echo"
count1
highlights
0"pulsed"
1"resonance"
2"chill"
3"footsteps"
4"flickered"
5"could feel"
6"crystal"
7"throbbed"
8"warmth"
9"shimmered"
10"whisper"
11"mosaic"
12"tracing"
13"maw"
14"depths"
15"tension"
16"flicker"
17"glinting"
18"echoing"
19"pulse"
20"resolve"
21"vibrated"
22"aligned"
23"charged"
24"wavering"
25"traced"
26"beacon"
27"weight"
28"loomed"
29"quivered"
30"stark"
31"grave"
32"echo"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells1
narrationSentences213
matches
0"d in sympathy"
55.67% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount13
narrationSentences213
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"appeared to"
2"began to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences240
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen53
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords4864
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions40
unquotedAttributions1
matches
0"Rory, keep focus, I told myself."
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions101
wordCount4341
uniqueNames16
maxNameDensity0.51
worstName"Nyx"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Nyx"
discoveredNames
Nyx22
Heartstone9
Pendant9
Fae-Forged3
Blade4
Varga1
Seer2
Isolde19
Veil11
Rory12
Shadow1
Hel1
Richmond1
Park1
Fae4
Matted1
persons
0"Nyx"
1"Pendant"
2"Blade"
3"Varga"
4"Seer"
5"Isolde"
6"Veil"
7"Rory"
8"Shadow"
places
0"Heartstone"
1"Richmond"
2"Park"
globalScore1
windowScore1
0.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences202
glossingSentenceCount20
matches
0"as if cupping a memory I didn’t have"
1"tasted like cold copper and rain that had"
2"appeared ahead of us, her silver hair catching the pale glow of the sap"
3"something like frostlight"
4"as if listening"
5"something like honey that stung, too sweet t"
6"chamber that seemed to be carved from the night itself—an amphitheatre of black glass and pale sap, where every surface reflected a version of us more than once and in more ways than one"
7"as if listening to our breath"
8"as if acknowledging a treaty being broken"
9"felt like a wall collapsing inward, and"
10"corridors that seemed to close behind me when I chased something I couldn’t name, of a fling at a life that didn’t belong to me"
11"as if inviting the three of us to step through"
12"sigils that seemed to breathe"
13"sounded like old timber giving way to the"
14"sounded like glass breaking softly, a hiss"
15"beacon that seemed to pull at the shadow creature like a child pulls a kite toward storm clouds"
16"something like relief—but relief that would"
17"sounded like a library after midnight and"
18"glow that seemed to anchor us in time rather than pull us through it"
19"teeth that seemed to grin even as it threatened to devour us all"
0.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches14
per1kWords2.878
wordCount4864
matches
0"not looking at us but at the cube as if it were a dangerous animal she knew how to"
1"not of men but of something"
2"not with distance but with memory"
3"no longer a veil but"
4"not to the thing, but to us"
5"not a stone, but a memory"
6"not a door but a hinge of air"
7"not night but a different night, a different seam of existence"
8"not nagging but guiding us toward the centre"
9"not look like a doorway to a place of horror but rather like a gate to something merciful"
10"no single throat but"
11"not from the void beyond but from the vessel of the place’s memory"
12"not a word but a weight"
13"no longer a mere threshold but"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences240
matches(empty)
85.04% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs95
mean51.2
std22.92
cv0.448
sampleLengths
042
120
284
378
442
537
644
775
810
970
1033
1152
1250
1313
1465
1521
1638
1747
1873
1943
2052
2144
2241
2324
2466
255
2635
2790
2852
2933
3037
3154
3275
3371
3446
3584
3677
37106
3851
3928
4032
4168
4244
4351
4485
4541
4674
4748
4834
4982
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount0
totalSentences213
matches(empty)
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount10
totalVerbs688
matches
0"was blinking"
1"weren’t looking"
2"were tasting"
3"was listening"
4"was translating"
5"were turning"
6"were running"
7"were listening"
8"was listening"
9"were leaning"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount40
semicolonCount10
flaggedSentences35
totalSentences240
ratio0.146
matches
0"Vines hung from the ceiling, luminescent sap trickling in slow, deliberate threads, and every so often a veinlit bulb twitched as if the chamber itself—alive—was blinking at us."
1"Each door reflected a scene—snatches of a life I might lead if I turned this way or that."
2"The chamber behind us—a shadow-stitched corridor—twitched in sympathy, as if the place itself could smell fear and hunger."
3"The Veil, yes—the place existed because it desired to be found only by the brave and the reckless, and we had come uninvited, with purpose and a mettle that wouldn’t let go."
4"Time pressed into itself, as if we had stepped into the pocket Isolde had warned about—the hour inside stretching to fill what seemed like days outside."
5"And fear needed the truth to become something else—a power, a plan, a flame that could burn away what bound us to this place."
6"A sound rose from the depths of the place—a metallic sigh, then a chorus of soft clacks that resembled footsteps not of men but of something that had learned to mimic them."
7"She did not point to a door; she spoke to a moment."
8"The first reflected our faces with a curious insistence; the second showed us aged, withered and wiser; the third altered us into silhouettes we’d never become."
9"We chose a door—an approach that felt more like a dare than a decision—and stepped through."
10"The space inside stretched, not with distance but with memory; it remembered our footsteps, our breath, the sound of Isolde’s whisper on the edge of hearing."
11"We found ourselves in a chamber that seemed to be carved from the night itself—an amphitheatre of black glass and pale sap, where every surface reflected a version of us more than once and in more ways than one."
12"The Shadow did not merely exist here; it adapted."
13"In the glassy surfaces we saw ourselves: Rory as a prosecutor, as a warrior, as a wanderer in a city of light and violence; Isolde as a figure standing calmly, a thread of prophecies trailing behind her; Nyx as a silhouette that flashed between forms, a chorus of whispers that never settled."
14"A figure formed at the far end of the chamber—a thing not human, with a mouth full of jagged, glass-like teeth and eyes that burned with the amber of heated metal."
15"The creature’s presence felt like a wall collapsing inward, and in that moment the chamber itself responded—each mirror surface rippled as if a fish gliding through water, the room tilting a fraction, gravity bending in a way that didn’t make sense but felt true."
16"The Heartstone Pendant pulsed violently now, warm heat pricking through the fabric of my coat, flooding my senses with a memory of something I couldn’t name—perhaps the Hel portals or a hunger that wasn’t mine but claimed me anyway."
17"I looked down at the pendant again, and for a moment I saw—not a stone, but a memory."
18"The door—this one not a door but a hinge of air—swung inward as if inviting the three of us to step through."
19"The ground bore patterns—constellations drawn in raised, pale glass that felt warm beneath my gloves."
20"It wasn’t wind; it was the place itself singing, a lullaby that held you still enough to listen and brave enough to walk."
21"What followed was a torrent of senses—too swift to name, too vivid to forget."
22"The glow of the blade flickered; Nyx’s shadow thickened and then split into a hundred frayed threads, each thread hanging temptingly in the light as if they might obscure or reveal what lay ahead."
23"Nyx moved, a dart of living shadow, slipping around the creature’s flank and striking where the light was weakest—where the room’s own fear fed the thing."
24"Then the air around us thickened, and a voice—thin as glass and old as a cathedral’s floor—spoke from the arch itself, not from the void beyond but from the vessel of the place’s memory."
25"The creature—already wounded by the truth we spoke—took one final step toward us and dissolved into the air with a sigh like a sleeping beast exhaling."
26"The arch breathing out, we stepped through into the next moment, which held less of fear and more of something like relief—but relief that would be short-lived."
27"The cube atop the dais—the one that had helped dissolve the wards—sat sealed in its glow, inactive for the moment, as if it too waited to learn whether we were worthy to carry its memory forward or whether we would leave it to rot in a corner of the Veil’s mind."
28"We were not simply trespassers here; we were seekers, and seekers in a place that rewarded boldness as much as it punished bravado."
29"The exit door—if it was to be found—would come only when we chose to call it by its true name, only when we understood what this memory asked of us in return."
30"A chorus of whispers swelled from every surface—floor, walls, even the glassy ceiling—like a congregation of eyes turning toward us and finally deciding to listen."
31"Then the weight lifted as if someone had released a clamp, and the chamber’s eye—its singular, amber gaze—found us again, the memory settling into our bones."
32"We moved as one—and the moment Matted itself with possibility—toward the arch that glowed with a pale, patient light."
33"The doorway across the room—no longer a mere threshold but a living thing—shivered, and a silhouette rose from the ground behind it: a figure of horn and shadow, eyes aflame with hunger, a long mouth filled with serrated teeth that seemed to grin even as it threatened to devour us all."
34"We stepped forward as one, and the next moment—the moment that would either bind us to the Veil or send us screaming back into the ordinary world—was a breath away."
82.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount4399
adjectiveStacks3
stackExamples
0"pale, frost-white light,"
1"lay beyond all doors."
2"terrible, hungry calm settled over us"
adverbCount164
adverbRatio0.03728120027278927
lyAdverbCount34
lyAdverbRatio0.007729029324846556
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences240
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences240
mean20.27
std9.82
cv0.485
sampleLengths
023
119
213
37
425
514
617
728
820
921
1012
1125
1216
1316
1410
1519
1618
1722
1822
1926
2031
2118
225
235
2428
2522
2620
2725
288
297
3020
3125
3218
3332
3411
352
369
3726
3814
3916
4021
4112
4221
435
446
4517
4624
4717
4827
4929
25.42% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats59
diversityRatio0.18333333333333332
totalSentences240
uniqueOpeners44
31.60% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount2
totalSentences211
matches
0"Then the air around us"
1"Then the weight lifted as"
ratio0.009
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount51
totalSentences211
matches
0"I pressed a gloved hand"
1"She moved as if the"
2"she murmured, eyes narrowing on"
3"I replied, though the blade"
4"They pressed a finger of"
5"I said, stepping after Isolde"
6"I raised the Blade, the"
7"We moved, and the world"
8"I said, voice barely above"
9"she said, smiling in a"
10"I was here to find"
11"We crossed the chamber on"
12"We paused as the flicker"
13"She did not point to"
14"We moved then, as a"
15"We chose a door—an approach"
16"It carried a scent I"
17"We found ourselves in a"
18"It moved with a hunger"
19"It spoke in breath and"
ratio0.242
0.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount201
totalSentences211
matches
0"The arch sighed and Nyx"
1"Rory, keep close, the pendant"
2"Nyx whispered, their voice a"
3"I pressed a gloved hand"
4"The stone warmed, then warmed"
5"The corridor opened into a"
6"Vines hung from the ceiling,"
7"The floor beneath us was"
8"Each step sent a soft"
9"The air tasted like cold"
10"The Fae-Forged Blade hummed against"
11"Isolde Varga appeared ahead of"
12"She moved as if the"
13"The Seer’s pale lavender eyes"
14"she murmured, eyes narrowing on"
15"I replied, though the blade"
16"The voices in the walls"
17"Nyx drifted closer to a"
18"They pressed a finger of"
19"Each door reflected a scene—snatches"
ratio0.953
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences211
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences166
technicalSentenceCount46
matches
0"Rory, keep close, the pendant pulsed against my chest, a warm, stubborn heartbeat that didn’t belong to this place."
1"Vines hung from the ceiling, luminescent sap trickling in slow, deliberate threads, and every so often a veinlit bulb twitched as if the chamber itself—alive—wa…"
2"The Fae-Forged Blade hummed against my palm, the moonsilver edge barely warm to the touch, a chill that promised it could sever more than metal."
3"She moved as if the grove itself had learned her footsteps and bowed to her presence."
4"They pressed a finger of fog to the cold surface and the shadow peeled back, revealing a corridor lined with doors that did not exist in any other map I’d studi…"
5"The cube pulsed with a heartbeat of its own, a pale glow that throbbed in sync with the pendant’s warmth."
6"The chamber behind us—a shadow-stitched corridor—twitched in sympathy, as if the place itself could smell fear and hunger."
7"The Fae-Forged Blade moved easily, tracing along a wall’s sigils with a light touch, as if it were born to listen to what the runes tried not to tell."
8"The corridors branching off the main hall bent and stretched, shifting as if the place itself reconfigured its joints when we weren’t looking."
9"A sound rose from the depths of the place—a metallic sigh, then a chorus of soft clacks that resembled footsteps not of men but of something that had learned to…"
10"The fourth door, the one nearest the dragon’s mouth arch, appeared to be barely a door at all, just a sliver of air that looked ready to swallow us whole if we …"
11"Rory spoke first, quick and practical, the sort of thing I’d expect from a person who’d run through deliveries and danger with the same stubborn pace."
12"The cube’s glow seemed to respond to the blade’s edge, smoothing the runes as if the weapon had coaxed a stubborn animal into following us."
13"The ceiling above us opened into a lattice of dark, star-work that wasn’t stars so much as living questions."
14"We found ourselves in a chamber that seemed to be carved from the night itself—an amphitheatre of black glass and pale sap, where every surface reflected a vers…"
15"In the glassy surfaces we saw ourselves: Rory as a prosecutor, as a warrior, as a wanderer in a city of light and violence; Isolde as a figure standing calmly, …"
16"The Heartstone Pendant’s glow intensified each time a reflection moved, and for a heartbeat I thought I could hear the pendant counting time in a language that …"
17"The wall behind us sighed and the runes there glowed softly, as if acknowledging a treaty being broken."
18"The creature’s presence felt like a wall collapsing inward, and in that moment the chamber itself responded—each mirror surface rippled as if a fish gliding thr…"
19"The blade in my hand grew colder, the glow around its edge turning tangibly blue, as if the moon itself had blown a frosty exhalation into the room."
20"The amber-eyed thing began to advance, a crawling hunger that brushed the outer edges of our perception."
21"The Heartstone Pendant pulsed violently now, warm heat pricking through the fabric of my coat, flooding my senses with a memory of something I couldn’t name—per…"
22"The monster staggered back as if struck by a blade of ice, its teeth clattering with a sound that resembled iron filings spilling across stone."
23"The spectres in the mirrors hissed and retreated at the edge, leaving a clearer path to the far wall, where a single door hung in mid-air, framed by the same ru…"
24"The ground bore patterns—constellations drawn in raised, pale glass that felt warm beneath my gloves."
25"The Heartstone Pendant continued its patient warmth, not nagging but guiding us toward the centre where an immense arch stood, carved with a spiderweb of sigils…"
26"It pulsed with a steady radiance, as if the place itself was listening to the three of us and preparing to decide whether we were worthy of entry."
27"And then, as if the place could not bear three living hearts without asking for something in return, a coiled thing of shadow rose from the floor in front of us…"
28"Its body was a wisp of smoke with edges that glittered like frost."
29"The glow of the blade flickered; Nyx’s shadow thickened and then split into a hundred frayed threads, each thread hanging temptingly in the light as if they mig…"
30"We met it head-on, the blade singing against something invisible that fought to hold us, the pendant’s warmth escalating into a fierce blaze that felt almost li…"
31"The Fae blade cut a path through the creature’s wisp-thin body, leaving behind a trail of smoke that smelled faintly of honey and iron."
32"The arch beside us shuddered, and the space grew hotter, as if the place itself were turning a corner toward something more dangerous."
33"The corridor contracted and opened, contracted and opened, as if we were running through a living bellows."
34"I ignored the fear that prickled at the back of my neck, ignored the way Nyx’s shade quivered at the edges of perception, ignored Isolde’s quiet, almost playful…"
35"The arch breathing out, we stepped through into the next moment, which held less of fear and more of something like relief—but relief that would be short-lived."
36"The dais reappeared in a pale, frost-white light, the Heartstone Pendant now a steady glow that seemed to anchor us in time rather than pull us through it."
37"The arch behind us pulsed again, a slow, patient rhythm, as if the place was listening to our chests, counting the cycles of our breath, deciding whether we wou…"
38"The Heartstone Pendant pulsed with a booming, almost audible heartbeat that caught in my throat and made the words I wanted to shout snag, stuck in my mouth lik…"
39"The arch, still open to whatever lay beyond, hummed a question we hadn’t expected to hear in a place that didn’t believe in questions anymore."
40"Then the weight lifted as if someone had released a clamp, and the chamber’s eye—its singular, amber gaze—found us again, the memory settling into our bones."
41"The doorway across the room—no longer a mere threshold but a living thing—shivered, and a silhouette rose from the ground behind it: a figure of horn and shadow…"
42"The thing moved with a patient, predatory grace, as if it had waited for us to reach this door and now, at last, could take its due."
43"We stepped forward as one, and the next moment—the moment that would either bind us to the Veil or send us screaming back into the ordinary world—was a breath a…"
44"The arch's light flared, a flare that caught the room in a blaze of pale gold and red, and a terrible, hungry calm settled over us as the gate began to move, sl…"
45"The chapter ends where the moment demands the next leap: with the world tilting, the ground cracking, and the shadowy guardian of the Veil closing in, its amber…"
67.31% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags26
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"Nyx whispered, their voice a thread of wind through our coats"
1"Nyx breathed, their voice a soft crack in the air"
2"I said, voice firmer than I felt"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags22
fancyCount11
fancyTags
0"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
1"she murmured (murmur)"
2"Nyx breathed (breathe)"
3"Isolde noted dryly (note)"
4"I whispered (whisper)"
5"Nyx murmured (murmur)"
6"Isolde breathed (breathe)"
7"I barked (bark)"
8"Isolde warned (warn)"
9"the voice whispered (whisper)"
10"Isolde murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences53
tagDensity0.415
leniency0.83
rawRatio0.5
effectiveRatio0.415
65.2887%