Run: 2026-02-20-01KHY7Q121MJYTBKQSENRY43GT

Run Details

Model:
Grok 4
Duration:
1m 38s
Cost:
$0.047456
Provider:
xAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Rory stepped through the shimmering rift, the air humming against her skin like the edge of a fever dream. The Heartstone Pendant around her neck throbbed with warmth, a steady pulse that matched her quickening heartbeat. She gripped the Fae-Forged Blade tighter in her right hand, its moonsilver surface cold and unyielding, a stark contrast to the sudden heat washing over her. Behind her, Nyx's shadowy form slithered through the portal like ink spilling across paper, solidifying into a tall, humanoid silhouette with faintly glowing violet eyes. Isolde followed last, her silver hair trailing like moonlit threads, her bare feet leaving no imprint on the threshold, as if she glided on whispers. The portal snapped shut with a faint pop, sealing them in this new world. Rory blinked against the onslaught of light—not the harsh glare of London's streetlamps, but a warm amber glow that bathed everything in perpetual sunset. The sky above stretched endless, no sun or stars, just that unbroken haze, like honey poured over the heavens. She inhaled sharply, the air thick with scents: ripe fruit bursting on the vine, spices roasting over open flames, the earthy tang of fresh-turned soil mingled with something sweeter, almost decadent, like chocolate melting in the sun. "Where are we?" Rory muttered, her bright blue eyes scanning the landscape. She ran a hand through her straight black hair, pushing it back from her face, feeling the small crescent scar on her left wrist itch faintly—a nervous habit from childhood. Isolde tilted her head, her pale lavender eyes gleaming with faint amusement. "A feast for the famished, where hunger wears a crown and excess is the throne. But beware the bite that never sates." Nyx's voice came as a whisper on the wind, their form shifting slightly, tendrils of shadow curling at the edges. "Dymas. The realm of Gluttony. I have glimpsed its edges from the between-spaces, but never tread its soil. It calls to the voids within us all." Rory swallowed, her cool-headed mind racing to process it. She'd fled Cardiff's rigid expectations, dodged an abusive ex in London, scrapped by on delivery shifts at the Golden Empress—but this? This was beyond out-of-the-box; this was the box shattered and reformed into something impossible. They had come here chasing a lead on the pendant's origins, guided by Isolde's cryptic visions and Nyx's shadowy reconnaissance. The Veil had parted for them during the winter solstice's weakness, a tear in reality's fabric that Nyx had widened just enough. Ahead, the land unfurled in sprawling excess. Vineyards stretched like tangled veins across rolling hills, grapes the size of plums hanging heavy in clusters of deep purple and gold, their skins glistening as if freshly waxed. Orchards dotted the horizon, trees bent under the weight of fruits Rory couldn't name—bulbous orbs that shimmered like jewels, some pulsing with inner light, others dripping nectar that stained the ground in sticky pools. Gardens bloomed in chaotic abundance, flowers with petals like velvet unfolding to reveal cores of what looked like spun sugar or roasted nuts. The ground underfoot was soft, almost spongy, carpeted in moss that released puffs of fragrant spores with each step. They moved forward, Rory leading with cautious strides, her delivery-person instincts kicking in—map the route, avoid obstacles, deliver on time. But there was no map here, no familiar streets. A gentle breeze carried sounds: distant laughter, the clink of goblets, the sizzle of meat on spits. Her stomach growled unexpectedly, a sharp pang that made her pause. She hadn't eaten since morning, but this hunger felt... amplified, like an echo chamber in her gut. "Feel that?" Nyx murmured, their violet eyes narrowing as they coalesced more solidly beside her. "The realm's essence. It seeps in, awakens cravings you didn't know you had." Isolde nodded, her ethereal form weaving between them without disturbing a single blade of grass. "The air here whispers promises of plenty, but the plate is ever full, the belly ever empty. One sip, and the river runs dry." Rory shook her head, forcing focus. "Let's keep moving. We need to find whoever sent this pendant." She touched the crimson gemstone at her throat; it glowed faintly now, warmer than before, as if attuned to this place. Deeper in, the wonders intensified. They crested a hill, and below sprawled a grand pavilion, its silken tents billowing in colors of harvest gold and wine red. Figures moved within—souls, perhaps, or demons—clad in flowing robes, piling platters high with delicacies. One chef, his skin mottled like aged cheese, wielded a knife that carved through a massive roast beast, juices spilling like rivers. The aroma hit Rory like a wave: caramelized onions, herbs she couldn't place, a sweetness that made her mouth water uncontrollably. She stopped, swaying slightly. Unease prickled her skin, a subtle wrongness beneath the beauty. Why did everything look so inviting? Why did her thoughts keep drifting to the last meal she'd had—Yu-Fei's spicy noodles, simple and satisfying—now amplified into an insatiable longing? Nyx extended a shadowy tendril, brushing against a nearby vine. A grape detached, rolling toward them, swelling as it did until it was the size of a melon. "Curious. The land responds to desire." Their whisper held a note of wariness, the first crack in their ageless composure. Isolde reached out, her fingers hovering without touching. "Touch not the fruit unless you court the vine's embrace. It grows not for the taker, but the taken." Rory knelt, examining it. The grape's skin was translucent, revealing seeds that swirled like tiny galaxies. She felt a pull, an urge to bite in, juice bursting across her tongue. But her quick thinking kicked in—Evan's manipulations had taught her to spot traps disguised as gifts. She stood abruptly, sheathing the Fae blade. "No. We're not here to indulge." As they pressed on, skirting the pavilion, the unease deepened. Shadows lengthened unnaturally under the amber sky, though no sun cast them. Whispers—not Nyx's—drifted on the breeze, faint voices urging, "Eat... taste... more..." Rory's scar itched fiercer, a reminder of childhood recklessness, falling from a tree while reaching for forbidden apples. They entered a denser orchard, trees twisting into archways that formed a natural corridor. Fruits hung low, brushing their shoulders—pears with skins like molten gold, apples that chimed softly when touched, emitting notes like distant bells. Rory ducked under one, feeling a cool mist spray from its surface, tasting faintly of cinnamon on her lips. Wonder bloomed in her chest, pushing back the disquiet. This place was alive, responsive, a living tapestry of indulgence. She imagined the chefs below crafting symphonies from these ingredients, helbound souls contracted from Earth—perhaps even people she knew, lost to this excess. Nyx paused, their form flickering incorporeal for a moment, slipping into a tree's shadow and reemerging. "There are eyes here. Watchers in the foliage. Not hostile, but... hungry for our hungers." A sudden discovery halted them: a clearing within the orchard, centered by a massive tree unlike the others. Its trunk was gnarled bark etched with glowing runes, branches heavy with fruits that shifted colors—ruby to emerald to sapphire. At its base, a pool of liquid nectar shimmered, reflecting the amber sky in ripples that moved without wind. Isolde approached, her waist-length hair swaying. "The Heart of Dymas, where gluttony's root drinks deep. Ask, and it may answer, but the price is a taste of your own void." Rory felt the pendant pulse hotter, drawing her forward. She knelt by the pool, peering in. Her reflection stared back, but distorted—her bright blue eyes wider, hungrier, her black hair wilder. Images flickered: a crimson gemstone forged in flames, handed by shadowed hands. "It's connected," she breathed. "This is where it came from." Unease surged as the pool bubbled, tendrils of nectar reaching up like fingers. Nyx yanked her back, their shadowy grip cold and firm. "Do not linger. The realm tempts, but it consumes." A low groan echoed from the tree, branches rustling as if awakening. Fruits dropped, splitting open to release scents that clawed at Rory's resolve—fresh bread, hot coffee, the comfort foods of her Cardiff childhood, twisted into something overpowering. Her stomach knotted, wonder warring with dread. This place was magnificent, a paradise of plenty, but it gnawed at the edges of self-control, promising fulfillment while hollowing you out. Isolde's voice cut through, riddling softly: "The feast ends when the guest becomes the meal. We seek the giver, not the gift." They retreated, moving deeper still, toward what looked like a grand hall in the distance, spires rising like iced confections. As they went, Rory glanced back, the tree's runes fading, but the pull lingered—a wondrous terror that this alien realm might never let them leave unchanged. The amber sky seemed to press closer, the air thicker with unspoken invitations, and Rory wondered if the real discovery was how thin the line between wonder and ruin truly was.
created_at"2026-02-20T19:16:35.531Z" 2/20/2026, 7:16:35 PM
model"x-ai/grok-4-07-09" 4/7/2009, 12:00:00 AM
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency24730
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time98293
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion2362
native_tokens_prompt2153
native_tokens_completion2835
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning873
native_tokens_cached679
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.04745625
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"d40bef9d-6936-4c57-9749-bf7399de4a77"
id"943c4cdd-d28b-c213-0c0e-dcc2e593c7e3"
is_byokfalse
latency224
model_permaslug"x-ai/grok-4-07-09" 4/7/2009, 12:00:00 AM
provider_name"xAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771614995-OpVZthWyALsLvUlnz0Bw"
upstream_id"943c4cdd-d28b-c213-0c0e-dcc2e593c7e3"
total_cost0.04745625
cache_discount0.00152775
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"xAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags6
adverbTagCount0
adverbTags(empty)
dialogueSentences17
tagDensity0.353
leniency0.706
rawRatio0
effectiveRatio0
80.11% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1508
totalAiIsmAdverbs6
found
0
adverb"sharply"
count1
1
adverb"slightly"
count2
2
adverb"softly"
count2
3
adverb"truly"
count1
highlights
0"sharply"
1"slightly"
2"softly"
3"truly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
0.53% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1508
totalAiIsms30
found
0
word"throbbed"
count1
1
word"warmth"
count1
2
word"pulse"
count2
3
word"stark"
count1
4
word"scanning"
count1
5
word"gleaming"
count1
6
word"whisper"
count2
7
word"racing"
count1
8
word"shattered"
count1
9
word"glistening"
count1
10
word"weight"
count1
11
word"shimmered"
count2
12
word"chaotic"
count1
13
word"velvet"
count1
14
word"familiar"
count1
15
word"stomach"
count2
16
word"pang"
count1
17
word"echo"
count1
18
word"desire"
count1
19
word"reminder"
count1
20
word"tapestry"
count1
21
word"etched"
count1
22
word"flickered"
count1
23
word"echoed"
count1
24
word"resolve"
count1
25
word"unspoken"
count1
highlights
0"throbbed"
1"warmth"
2"pulse"
3"stark"
4"scanning"
5"gleaming"
6"whisper"
7"racing"
8"shattered"
9"glistening"
10"weight"
11"shimmered"
12"chaotic"
13"velvet"
14"familiar"
15"stomach"
16"pang"
17"echo"
18"desire"
19"reminder"
20"tapestry"
21"etched"
22"flickered"
23"echoed"
24"resolve"
25"unspoken"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"stomach dropped/sank"
count1
highlights
0"stomach knotted"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells2
narrationSentences80
matches
0"d with warmth"
1"g with dread"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences80
filterMatches
0"look"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences90
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen38
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1482
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions8
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
91.18% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions51
wordCount1275
uniqueNames19
maxNameDensity1.18
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Nyx"
discoveredNames
Heartstone1
Pendant1
Fae-Forged1
Blade1
Nyx9
London2
Cardiff2
Golden1
Empress1
Isolde7
Veil1
Rory15
Deeper1
Yu1
Fei1
Evan1
Fae2
Earth1
Unease2
persons
0"Nyx"
1"Isolde"
2"Veil"
3"Rory"
4"Fei"
5"Evan"
6"Unease"
places
0"London"
1"Cardiff"
2"Golden"
3"Earth"
globalScore0.912
windowScore1
51.32% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences76
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"looked like spun sugar or roasted nuts"
1"as if awakening"
2"looked like a grand hall in the distance"
0.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches3
per1kWords2.024
wordCount1482
matches
0"not the harsh glare of London's streetlamps, but a warm amber glow"
1"not for the taker, but the taken"
2"Not hostile, but"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences90
matches(empty)
90.11% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs26
mean57
std26.53
cv0.465
sampleLengths
0112
194
242
334
446
586
6112
774
828
939
1038
1184
1242
1348
1427
1559
1651
1797
1831
1957
2030
2153
2232
2367
2422
2577
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount1
totalSentences80
matches
0"was gnarled"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs235
matches(empty)
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount19
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences17
totalSentences90
ratio0.189
matches
0"Rory blinked against the onslaught of light—not the harsh glare of London's streetlamps, but a warm amber glow that bathed everything in perpetual sunset."
1"She ran a hand through her straight black hair, pushing it back from her face, feeling the small crescent scar on her left wrist itch faintly—a nervous habit from childhood."
2"She'd fled Cardiff's rigid expectations, dodged an abusive ex in London, scrapped by on delivery shifts at the Golden Empress—but this?"
3"This was beyond out-of-the-box; this was the box shattered and reformed into something impossible."
4"Orchards dotted the horizon, trees bent under the weight of fruits Rory couldn't name—bulbous orbs that shimmered like jewels, some pulsing with inner light, others dripping nectar that stained the ground in sticky pools."
5"They moved forward, Rory leading with cautious strides, her delivery-person instincts kicking in—map the route, avoid obstacles, deliver on time."
6"\"Let's keep moving. We need to find whoever sent this pendant.\" She touched the crimson gemstone at her throat; it glowed faintly now, warmer than before, as if attuned to this place."
7"Figures moved within—souls, perhaps, or demons—clad in flowing robes, piling platters high with delicacies."
8"Why did her thoughts keep drifting to the last meal she'd had—Yu-Fei's spicy noodles, simple and satisfying—now amplified into an insatiable longing?"
9"But her quick thinking kicked in—Evan's manipulations had taught her to spot traps disguised as gifts."
10"Whispers—not Nyx's—drifted on the breeze, faint voices urging, \"Eat... taste... more...\" Rory's scar itched fiercer, a reminder of childhood recklessness, falling from a tree while reaching for forbidden apples."
11"Fruits hung low, brushing their shoulders—pears with skins like molten gold, apples that chimed softly when touched, emitting notes like distant bells."
12"She imagined the chefs below crafting symphonies from these ingredients, helbound souls contracted from Earth—perhaps even people she knew, lost to this excess."
13"Its trunk was gnarled bark etched with glowing runes, branches heavy with fruits that shifted colors—ruby to emerald to sapphire."
14"Her reflection stared back, but distorted—her bright blue eyes wider, hungrier, her black hair wilder."
15"Fruits dropped, splitting open to release scents that clawed at Rory's resolve—fresh bread, hot coffee, the comfort foods of her Cardiff childhood, twisted into something overpowering."
16"As they went, Rory glanced back, the tree's runes fading, but the pull lingered—a wondrous terror that this alien realm might never let them leave unchanged."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1300
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount40
adverbRatio0.03076923076923077
lyAdverbCount16
lyAdverbRatio0.012307692307692308
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences90
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences90
mean16.47
std7.64
cv0.464
sampleLengths
019
117
226
325
425
514
624
719
837
912
1030
1112
1222
1320
1426
159
1621
1714
1820
1922
207
2129
2234
2323
2419
2520
269
2717
2811
299
308
3115
3213
3315
3424
356
3632
375
3822
3914
4022
4121
424
4310
446
4522
4610
4718
4820
498
71.11% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats1
diversityRatio0.43333333333333335
totalSentences90
uniqueOpeners39
0.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount0
totalSentences79
matches(empty)
ratio0
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount21
totalSentences79
matches
0"She gripped the Fae-Forged Blade"
1"She inhaled sharply, the air"
2"She ran a hand through"
3"She'd fled Cardiff's rigid expectations,"
4"They had come here chasing"
5"They moved forward, Rory leading"
6"Her stomach growled unexpectedly, a"
7"She hadn't eaten since morning,"
8"She touched the crimson gemstone"
9"They crested a hill, and"
10"She stopped, swaying slightly."
11"Their whisper held a note"
12"She felt a pull, an"
13"She stood abruptly, sheathing the"
14"They entered a denser orchard,"
15"She imagined the chefs below"
16"Its trunk was gnarled bark"
17"She knelt by the pool,"
18"Her reflection stared back, but"
19"Her stomach knotted, wonder warring"
ratio0.266
42.28% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount66
totalSentences79
matches
0"Rory stepped through the shimmering"
1"The Heartstone Pendant around her"
2"She gripped the Fae-Forged Blade"
3"Isolde followed last, her silver"
4"The portal snapped shut with"
5"Rory blinked against the onslaught"
6"The sky above stretched endless,"
7"She inhaled sharply, the air"
8"Rory muttered, her bright blue"
9"She ran a hand through"
10"Isolde tilted her head, her"
11"Nyx's voice came as a"
12"Rory swallowed, her cool-headed mind"
13"She'd fled Cardiff's rigid expectations,"
14"This was beyond out-of-the-box; this"
15"They had come here chasing"
16"The Veil had parted for"
17"Vineyards stretched like tangled veins"
18"Orchards dotted the horizon, trees"
19"The ground underfoot was soft,"
ratio0.835
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences79
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences57
technicalSentenceCount16
matches
0"The Heartstone Pendant around her neck throbbed with warmth, a steady pulse that matched her quickening heartbeat."
1"Isolde followed last, her silver hair trailing like moonlit threads, her bare feet leaving no imprint on the threshold, as if she glided on whispers."
2"Rory blinked against the onslaught of light—not the harsh glare of London's streetlamps, but a warm amber glow that bathed everything in perpetual sunset."
3"She ran a hand through her straight black hair, pushing it back from her face, feeling the small crescent scar on her left wrist itch faintly—a nervous habit fr…"
4"Vineyards stretched like tangled veins across rolling hills, grapes the size of plums hanging heavy in clusters of deep purple and gold, their skins glistening …"
5"Orchards dotted the horizon, trees bent under the weight of fruits Rory couldn't name—bulbous orbs that shimmered like jewels, some pulsing with inner light, ot…"
6"Her stomach growled unexpectedly, a sharp pang that made her pause."
7"The aroma hit Rory like a wave: caramelized onions, herbs she couldn't place, a sweetness that made her mouth water uncontrollably."
8"The grape's skin was translucent, revealing seeds that swirled like tiny galaxies."
9"Fruits hung low, brushing their shoulders—pears with skins like molten gold, apples that chimed softly when touched, emitting notes like distant bells."
10"Rory ducked under one, feeling a cool mist spray from its surface, tasting faintly of cinnamon on her lips."
11"Nyx paused, their form flickering incorporeal for a moment, slipping into a tree's shadow and reemerging."
12"Its trunk was gnarled bark etched with glowing runes, branches heavy with fruits that shifted colors—ruby to emerald to sapphire."
13"At its base, a pool of liquid nectar shimmered, reflecting the amber sky in ripples that moved without wind."
14"A low groan echoed from the tree, branches rustling as if awakening."
15"Fruits dropped, splitting open to release scents that clawed at Rory's resolve—fresh bread, hot coffee, the comfort foods of her Cardiff childhood, twisted into…"
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags6
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags3
fancyCount3
fancyTags
0"Rory muttered (mutter)"
1"Nyx murmured (murmur)"
2"she breathed (breathe)"
dialogueSentences17
tagDensity0.176
leniency0.353
rawRatio1
effectiveRatio0.353
70.8877%