Run: 2026-02-20-01KHY7ZN561HHWZ1YAJYMNA7QV

Run Details

Duration:
41.4s
Cost:
$0.001404
Provider:
xAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Aurora's fingers tightened around the Heartstone Pendant, its deep crimson gem pulsing like a heartbeat against her palm. The faint warmth had grown insistent over the past hour, tugging her deeper into Richmond Park's fog-shrouded fringes. Beside her, Nyx flowed like spilled ink across the dew-slick grass, their humanoid silhouette flickering between solidity and vapor. Isolde glided ahead, silver hair swaying like moonlight on water, her pale lavender eyes fixed on some unseen horizon. No footprints marred the earth behind her—never did. "The Veil thins here," Isolde murmured, her voice a riddle wrapped in silk. "A whisper seeks the roar, and what hungers finds its door." Rory shot her a sidelong glance, the small crescent scar on her wrist itching under the chill night air. "Poetic as ever. Just point me at the rift before Eva starts blowing up my phone again." Her delivery shift at Golden Empress had barely ended when Isolde's cryptic missive arrived—*Seek the amber hunger where shadows feast.* Nyx had materialized from her flat's corner shadows uninvited, violet eyes gleaming. *Trouble calls,* they'd whispered, wind through cracked glass. Now, the air hummed, a faint shimmering distortion rippling before them like heat haze over asphalt. The pendant throbbed hotter, and Rory's skin prickled as if static-charged. Nyx solidified beside her, tall frame casting elongated shadows that writhed independently. "It's open," they said, voice a breeze sighing through bare branches. "Hel's breath on our necks." Isolde raised a hand, moonsilver rings glinting. "Step where the heart leads, child of law and flight. But beware—the glutton takes what it tastes." Rory drew the Fae-Forged Blade from her jacket's hidden sheath. Its leaf-shaped edge hummed cold against her palm, luminescent even in the park's gloom. She nodded, heart hammering. One breath, then they plunged through. The world inverted. A rush like falling through warm honey enveloped her—viscous, sweet-scented, clinging to her straight black hair and denim jacket. Her stomach lurched, boots finding purchase on something yielding, not quite soil. She staggered, blade raised, breath fogging in sudden humidity. Amber light flooded her vision, the sky above a vast dome of molten honey, streaked with lazy swirls of deeper gold. No sun, no stars—just endless twilight warmth that seeped into her bones, loosening tendons she hadn't realized were knotted. The air tasted of ripe mango and smoked meat, heavy with the perfume of overripe fruit and baking bread. Her mouth watered unbidden. "What the hell—" Rory blinked, bright blue eyes widening. Vineyards stretched in every direction, vines thicker than her thigh twisting up trellises of bone-white stone. Grapes the size of fists dangled, skins translucent purple veined with gold, dripping viscous nectar that sizzled faintly on the ground. Orchards flanked them, trees groaning under burdens of fruit she'd never seen: orbs like swollen hearts pulsing softly, spires of crystal apples refracting the amber sky into rainbows, clusters of berries that hummed low tunes when the breeze stirred. Nyx materialized fully beside her, six-foot-two frame rippling as they inhaled deeply. "Dymas," they whispered, violet glow flaring. "Gluttony's belly. Belphegor's playground." Isolde stepped through last, unperturbed, her waist-length silver hair unmussed. She tilted her head, lavender eyes distant. "The prince's table is set eternal. Eat if you dare; starve if you deny." Rory sheathed the blade halfway, scanning for threats. The ground beneath her boots was spongy, a mosaic of fallen petals and pulp that squelched warmly, releasing bursts of cinnamon steam. Distant laughter echoed—rich, guttural, mingled with the wet smack of jaws and clinking goblets. No birdsong, but a constant undercurrent: bubbling broths, crackling fires, the symphony of endless feasting. "First time in Hel proper?" Nyx asked, shadows coiling around their feet like curious serpents. They extended a hand, solidifying fingers brushing a low-hanging grape. It burst at the touch, spraying juice that tingled on Rory's cheek like champagne fizz. She wiped it away, grimacing at the addictive sweetness lingering on her tongue. "Yeah, not on my Cardiff Uni syllabus. You?" Nyx's whispery laugh stirred leaves. "Trapped nearby once. Aldric's folly. This... excess was forbidden fruit then." They moved deeper, boots sinking into loamy paths lined with hedges of herbs that rustled whispers in unknown tongues. Rory's pendant cooled now, its pulse steady, as if sated. The air grew thicker, pressing against her chest like a full belly after Christmas dinner at her parents'. Unease prickled—how long had they walked? Minutes? Her watch read 11:47 PM, same as entry, but the amber sky hadn't shifted. A grand archway loomed ahead, carved from amber-veined marble into snarling faces with mouths agape, tongues lolling plates of fruit. Beyond: a plaza alive with motion. Helbound souls—translucent figures in archaic garb—tended vast kitchens under open skies. Chefs in soot-stained aprons hurled spices into cauldrons bubbling with liquid gold, flames leaping unnaturally high without wood. Tables groaned under roasts that self-carved, juices carving rivers into checkered cloths. Competitors diced ethereal vegetables that reformed if sliced wrong, judges—horned imps with distended bellies—sampling bites that made their eyes roll back in ecstasy. Rory froze as one soul, a portly man in Victorian finery, locked eyes with her. His gaze lingered hungrily, fork pausing mid-air. "Fresh meat," he rasped, voice echoing wetly. Nyx tensed, shadows thickening. "They smell mortal essence. Keep moving." Isolde smiled enigmatically. "Hunger sees what fills it. But the empty chase the full." They veered left, into the orchards. Trees here bore fruits that defied gravity: peaches floating inches above branches, lemons etched with glowing runes that shifted like living tattoos. Rory reached for one—a plum the size of her fist, skin velvet black flecked with stars. It vibrated under her fingers, warm as breath. Curiosity won; she bit. Juice exploded, tart-sweet fire racing down her throat, igniting visions: her mother's Welsh cakes steaming on the sill, Eva's laughter over cheap wine, the sting of Evan's fists. Memories amplified, flavors blooming impossibly vivid. She gasped, dropping the core, which sprouted instantly into a sapling. "God, that's—" Words failed. Wonder surged, chasing the unease. Nyx plucked a crystalline apple, shattering it against a trunk. Shards melted into wine that they sipped from cupped shadows. "Sustains forever. Or destroys." Deeper still, the path wound into gardens where flowers bloomed plates of pastry, petals unfurling éclairs dripping custard. Statues of reclining gluttons wept fountains of chocolate that hardened into truffles on contact with air. Sounds layered: moans of delight, burps like thunder, the slurp of invisible drinkers at dry wells. Unease deepened as shadows lengthened unnaturally, coiling toward them. Rory's scar burned, a old ache flaring. "This place... it's alive. Feeding on us." Isolde nodded, gliding soundlessly. "The sin that devours its vessel. Yet beauty in the banquet." A discovery: amid thorned brambles heavy with berry-canes, a pedestal cradled a single fruit—an orb of swirling crimson, mirroring Rory's pendant. It pulsed in sync, warmth drawing her forward. Nyx hissed, "Artifact echo. Dymas-born." She approached, blade drawn. The Fae edge glowed faintly, cold steel parting wards invisible to her eyes. The orb quivered, whispering in her father's barrister voice: *Take, Aurora. Fill the void.* Her hand hovered. Visions tempted—escape from London drudgery, endless feasts erasing loneliness. But the scar throbbed warning. "No." She sliced clean. The orb shattered, releasing a mist that coalesced into a map of glowing veins across the ground—paths to deeper rifts, perhaps to Belphegor's hall. Nyx's eyes flared violet. "Clever. You've marked the veins of Gluttony." Isolde's riddle-smile widened. "The heart denies the maw, and so unveils the core." Laughter swelled from the plaza, closer now. Footsteps—wet, slapping—approached through the vines. Rory pocketed a shard of the orb, pulse syncing with her pendant. "Company. We go deeper or back?" Nyx flowed ahead, scouting. "Deeper. The wonder hides teeth." They pressed on, amber sky unchanging, the garden's bounty whispering temptations. Rory's senses sharpened—every breath a sip of ambrosia, every step sinking into paradise's plush deceit. Hel's heart beat around them, wondrous and ravenous, as the path spiraled into shadowed groves where feasts turned feral. The air hummed with promise and peril, drawing them inexorably inward.
created_at"2026-02-20T19:21:18.259Z" 2/20/2026, 7:21:18 PM
model"x-ai/grok-4.1-fast"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency336
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time41252
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion2528
native_tokens_prompt1624
native_tokens_completion2646
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning724
native_tokens_cached1623
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.00140435
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9821aa0e-dce3-4c27-9716-161359123d0b"
id"f4252dee-c7b4-e952-528e-418ceb137e59"
is_byokfalse
latency168
model_permaslug"x-ai/grok-4.1-fast"
provider_name"xAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771615278-lpYPGQWCXq6i33j56MTo"
upstream_id"f4252dee-c7b4-e952-528e-418ceb137e59"
total_cost0.00140435
cache_discount0.00024345
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"xAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags11
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Golden Empress had barely [barely]"
dialogueSentences26
tagDensity0.423
leniency0.846
rawRatio0.091
effectiveRatio0.077
85.43% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1373
totalAiIsmAdverbs4
found
0
adverb"softly"
count1
1
adverb"warmly"
count1
2
adverb"hungrily"
count1
3
adverb"inexorably"
count1
highlights
0"softly"
1"warmly"
2"hungrily"
3"inexorably"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
0.00% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1373
totalAiIsms36
found
0
word"warmth"
count3
1
word"silk"
count1
2
word"whisper"
count1
3
word"chill"
count1
4
word"gleaming"
count1
5
word"throbbed"
count2
6
word"charged"
count1
7
word"glinting"
count1
8
word"gloom"
count1
9
word"stomach"
count1
10
word"lurched"
count1
11
word"crystal"
count1
12
word"scanning"
count1
13
word"mosaic"
count1
14
word"echoed"
count1
15
word"symphony"
count1
16
word"pulse"
count2
17
word"loomed"
count1
18
word"marble"
count1
19
word"echoing"
count1
20
word"etched"
count1
21
word"velvet"
count1
22
word"vibrated"
count1
23
word"racing"
count1
24
word"crystalline"
count1
25
word"pulsed"
count1
26
word"echo"
count1
27
word"quivered"
count1
28
word"shattered"
count1
29
word"maw"
count1
30
word"footsteps"
count1
31
word"peril"
count1
highlights
0"warmth"
1"silk"
2"whisper"
3"chill"
4"gleaming"
5"throbbed"
6"charged"
7"glinting"
8"gloom"
9"stomach"
10"lurched"
11"crystal"
12"scanning"
13"mosaic"
14"echoed"
15"symphony"
16"pulse"
17"loomed"
18"marble"
19"echoing"
20"etched"
21"velvet"
22"vibrated"
23"racing"
24"crystalline"
25"pulsed"
26"echo"
27"quivered"
28"shattered"
29"maw"
30"footsteps"
31"peril"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences100
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences100
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences116
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen49
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans3
markdownWords14
totalWords1337
ratio0.01
matches
0"Seek the amber hunger where shadows feast."
1"Trouble calls,"
2"Take, Aurora. Fill the void."
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions11
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
93.92% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions55
wordCount1159
uniqueNames23
maxNameDensity1.12
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity2
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Heartstone1
Pendant1
Richmond1
Park1
Nyx11
Rory13
Golden1
Empress1
Isolde8
Fae-Forged1
Blade1
Vineyards1
Christmas1
Unease2
Victorian1
Welsh1
Eva1
Evan1
Wonder1
Fae2
Aurora2
London1
Belphegor1
persons
0"Pendant"
1"Nyx"
2"Rory"
3"Empress"
4"Isolde"
5"Blade"
6"Vineyards"
7"Unease"
8"Eva"
9"Evan"
10"Wonder"
11"Aurora"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"Golden"
3"Victorian"
4"London"
5"Belphegor"
globalScore0.939
windowScore1
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences77
glossingSentenceCount1
matches
0"not quite soil"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount1337
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences116
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs36
mean37.14
std22.7
cv0.611
sampleLengths
082
124
276
355
424
534
643
763
89
976
1022
1131
1259
1340
1421
1516
1668
1790
1829
1910
2014
2156
2245
239
2424
2550
2623
2715
2834
2931
3045
3111
3213
3330
349
3556
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount0
totalSentences100
matches(empty)
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs243
matches(empty)
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount17
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences16
totalSentences116
ratio0.138
matches
0"No footprints marred the earth behind her—never did."
1"\"Poetic as ever. Just point me at the rift before Eva starts blowing up my phone again.\" Her delivery shift at Golden Empress had barely ended when Isolde's cryptic missive arrived—*Seek the amber hunger where shadows feast.* Nyx had materialized from her flat's corner shadows uninvited, violet eyes gleaming."
2"A rush like falling through warm honey enveloped her—viscous, sweet-scented, clinging to her straight black hair and denim jacket."
3"No sun, no stars—just endless twilight warmth that seeped into her bones, loosening tendons she hadn't realized were knotted."
4"\"The prince's table is set eternal. Eat if you dare; starve if you deny.\""
5"Distant laughter echoed—rich, guttural, mingled with the wet smack of jaws and clinking goblets."
6"Unease prickled—how long had they walked?"
7"Helbound souls—translucent figures in archaic garb—tended vast kitchens under open skies."
8"Competitors diced ethereal vegetables that reformed if sliced wrong, judges—horned imps with distended bellies—sampling bites that made their eyes roll back in ecstasy."
9"Rory reached for one—a plum the size of her fist, skin velvet black flecked with stars."
10"Curiosity won; she bit."
11"A discovery: amid thorned brambles heavy with berry-canes, a pedestal cradled a single fruit—an orb of swirling crimson, mirroring Rory's pendant."
12"Visions tempted—escape from London drudgery, endless feasts erasing loneliness."
13"The orb shattered, releasing a mist that coalesced into a map of glowing veins across the ground—paths to deeper rifts, perhaps to Belphegor's hall."
14"Footsteps—wet, slapping—approached through the vines."
15"Rory's senses sharpened—every breath a sip of ambrosia, every step sinking into paradise's plush deceit."
94.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount685
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"thicker, pressing against her"
adverbCount18
adverbRatio0.026277372262773723
lyAdverbCount8
lyAdverbRatio0.01167883211678832
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences116
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences116
mean11.53
std7.27
cv0.631
sampleLengths
018
118
219
319
48
513
611
719
849
98
1016
1111
1212
1311
145
157
1617
1710
1814
194
206
213
2219
2312
249
2521
2619
2719
284
299
3016
3121
3239
3312
346
354
3610
377
3814
398
4022
4114
4215
4315
4410
4515
4613
478
485
4911
83.91% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats1
diversityRatio0.5086206896551724
totalSentences116
uniqueOpeners59
0.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount0
totalSentences97
matches(empty)
ratio0
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount24
totalSentences97
matches
0"Her delivery shift at Golden"
1"they said, voice a breeze"
2"Its leaf-shaped edge hummed cold"
3"She nodded, heart hammering."
4"Her stomach lurched, boots finding"
5"She staggered, blade raised, breath"
6"Her mouth watered unbidden."
7"they whispered, violet glow flaring"
8"She tilted her head, lavender"
9"They extended a hand, solidifying"
10"It burst at the touch,"
11"She wiped it away, grimacing"
12"They moved deeper, boots sinking"
13"Her watch read 11:47 PM,"
14"His gaze lingered hungrily, fork"
15"he rasped, voice echoing wetly"
16"They veered left, into the"
17"It vibrated under her fingers,"
18"She gasped, dropping the core,"
19"It pulsed in sync, warmth"
ratio0.247
27.01% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount84
totalSentences97
matches
0"Aurora's fingers tightened around the"
1"The faint warmth had grown"
2"Isolde glided ahead, silver hair"
3"Isolde murmured, her voice a"
4"Rory shot her a sidelong"
5"Her delivery shift at Golden"
6"The pendant throbbed hotter, and"
7"Nyx solidified beside her, tall"
8"they said, voice a breeze"
9"Isolde raised a hand, moonsilver"
10"Rory drew the Fae-Forged Blade"
11"Its leaf-shaped edge hummed cold"
12"She nodded, heart hammering."
13"The world inverted."
14"A rush like falling through"
15"Her stomach lurched, boots finding"
16"She staggered, blade raised, breath"
17"Amber light flooded her vision,"
18"The air tasted of ripe"
19"Her mouth watered unbidden."
ratio0.866
51.55% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences97
matches
0"Now, the air hummed, a"
ratio0.01
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences54
technicalSentenceCount11
matches
0"No sun, no stars—just endless twilight warmth that seeped into her bones, loosening tendons she hadn't realized were knotted."
1"Grapes the size of fists dangled, skins translucent purple veined with gold, dripping viscous nectar that sizzled faintly on the ground."
2"Orchards flanked them, trees groaning under burdens of fruit she'd never seen: orbs like swollen hearts pulsing softly, spires of crystal apples refracting the …"
3"The ground beneath her boots was spongy, a mosaic of fallen petals and pulp that squelched warmly, releasing bursts of cinnamon steam."
4"It burst at the touch, spraying juice that tingled on Rory's cheek like champagne fizz."
5"They moved deeper, boots sinking into loamy paths lined with hedges of herbs that rustled whispers in unknown tongues."
6"Competitors diced ethereal vegetables that reformed if sliced wrong, judges—horned imps with distended bellies—sampling bites that made their eyes roll back in …"
7"Trees here bore fruits that defied gravity: peaches floating inches above branches, lemons etched with glowing runes that shifted like living tattoos."
8"Juice exploded, tart-sweet fire racing down her throat, igniting visions: her mother's Welsh cakes steaming on the sill, Eva's laughter over cheap wine, the sti…"
9"Statues of reclining gluttons wept fountains of chocolate that hardened into truffles on contact with air."
10"The orb shattered, releasing a mist that coalesced into a map of glowing veins across the ground—paths to deeper rifts, perhaps to Belphegor's hall."
0.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags11
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"Isolde murmured, her voice a riddle wrapped in silk"
1"Nyx asked, shadows coiling around their feet like curious serpents"
2"he rasped, voice echoing wetly"
34.62% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags5
fancyCount3
fancyTags
0"Isolde murmured (murmur)"
1"they whispered (whisper)"
2"Nyx hissed (hiss)"
dialogueSentences26
tagDensity0.192
leniency0.385
rawRatio0.6
effectiveRatio0.231
75.6810%