Run: 2026-02-20-01KHYADYZ6HPWSWR1BMBEBYKZQ

Run Details

Duration:
42.3s
Cost:
$0.001687
Provider:
xAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Aurora's fingers fumbled with the third deadbolt, the heavy clunk echoing through the cramped hallway of Eva's flat like a reluctant confession. The air inside reeked of curry spices seeping up from the restaurant below—cumin and turmeric clinging to every book-strewn surface—and Ptolemy, Eva's tabby cat, wound around her ankles with an insistent meow. It was past ten on a drizzly London night, and Rory had no business opening the door to anyone. But the knock had been precise, three measured raps, not the frantic pounding of a neighbor or the lazy buzz of a delivery. She yanked the door open, the hinges groaning in protest, and there he stood. Lucien Moreau. The sight of him hit her like a gut punch, stealing the breath she'd been hoarding since she'd fled Cardiff. Platinum blond hair slicked back impeccably, not a strand disturbed by the rain that glistened on his tailored charcoal suit. His ivory-handled cane rested lightly in his right hand, the other tucked into his pocket with casual elegance. Those eyes—one amber, gleaming like polished citrine, the other black as abyssal ink—locked onto hers with unnerving intensity. "Rory," he said, his voice a silken drawl laced with that Marseille accent, four languages woven into every syllable. "Or should I say Laila tonight? You always did favor disguises." Her heart slammed against her ribs, bright blue eyes narrowing as she gripped the doorframe. The small crescent scar on her left wrist itched under her sleeve, a phantom reminder of childhood falls and promises broken long before this man. Five months. Five months since she'd stormed out of his Mayfair penthouse, his demon-tainted scent—smoke and oud—clinging to her skin like a curse. They'd burned hot and fast: stolen nights in shadowed corners of London's underworld, his hands mapping her body with the precision of a cartographer, whispers of alliances against threats she barely understood. Then the hurt—the way he'd vanished into his "business" after her ex, Evan, had shown up snarling threats, leaving her to fend off the bruises alone. Things left unsaid: her fear of his half-demon blood, his refusal to drag her deeper into the shadows. "What the hell are you doing here?" She kept her voice cool, a blade wrapped in velvet, but her straight shoulder-length black hair fell across her face, betraying the tremor in her hand as she steadied the door. Ptolemy slunk past her legs, rubbing against Lucien's polished shoe with traitorous affection. He didn't flinch, didn't smirk. Instead, he tilted his head, amber eye flickering in the dim light of the hallway bulb. "May I come in? The rain is less forgiving than your hospitality." "No." The word snapped out sharper than intended, but she didn't step aside. Eva's flat wasn't hers—cramped one-bedroom chaos of stacked books, yellowed scrolls pinned to walls, research notes fluttering like trapped moths—but it felt like sanctuary. Three deadbolts for a reason. "You lost your key to my soul or something? Last I checked, we were done." Lucien's lips curved, not quite a smile, more a predator's assessment. He leaned on his cane, the ivory handle carved with subtle infernal runes she now recognized. "Done? Mon cœur, we were never finished. Just... interrupted." His black eye seemed to swallow the light, pulling at her like gravity. Rain dripped from his lapels, pooling at his feet, but he ignored it. "Evan's back. With friends. The kind that don't play by human rules." Her stomach twisted. Evan—the abusive shadow she'd run from, the reason she'd crashed into Eva's life and this cluttered haven on Brick Lane. Pre-Law dreams shattered, delivery gigs at Golden Empress barely paying the rent above Silas' bar. And Lucien, who'd swept in like a storm, promising protection in exchange for... everything. Attraction had ignited in the spaces between danger: his fingers tracing her scar in the dark, her nails raking his back as heterochromatic eyes bored into hers during fevered thrusts. Hurt had followed when he'd prioritized his underworld deals, leaving her to Evan's fists. "Bullshit." She crossed her arms, the damp chill from the open door seeping into her thin sweater. But doubt flickered. Lucien's world was real—demons from Avaros, brokers like him trading secrets in tailcoated shadows. "You expect me to believe you tracked me here for my sake? After you ghosted?" He stepped closer, invading her space without touching the threshold. The scent of him cut through the curry haze: expensive cologne masking brimstone. "Ghosted? I shielded you. Your ex unearthed contacts—low-level imps sniffing around Cardiff connections. Your father's barrister firm? Compromised. I handled it quietly." Her pulse thrummed in her throat. Brendan Carter's stern face flashed in her mind, Jennifer's soft Welsh lilt urging her to law school. Family she'd distanced herself from, but not erased. "Handled how? With your cane-blade? Or by fucking off to Marseille?" The amber eye darkened, a muscle ticking in his jaw. "Language, Rory. We're not children." But his gaze dropped, tracing the line of her neck, the swell of her breasts under the sweater—hunger undisguised. Ptolemy leaped onto a nearby stack of books, tail flicking as if arbitrating. She hated how her body responded, heat pooling low despite the anger. Cool-headed Rory, quick-thinking Rory, reduced to this magnetic pull. "Get out. Eva's not here, and neither is my welcome mat." Lucien exhaled, a sound like distant thunder. Then, with deliberate slowness, he extended his free hand, palm up. Raindrops clung to his skin like diamonds. "Five minutes. Hear me out. Then I'll leave—if you still want me gone." Against every instinct screaming trap, she stepped back. The door swung wider, admitting him like a shadow lengthening at dusk. He moved with fluid grace, cane tapping softly on the scuffed floorboards. The flat enveloped him awkwardly—his broad shoulders brushing stacks of occult tomes, his height forcing a slight stoop under the low ceiling. Ptolemy purred, weaving figure-eights around his ankles as Lucien closed the door, the deadbolts clicking home under his deft fingers. "Show-off," she muttered, retreating to the kitchenette. Every surface screamed Eva: grimoires open to summoning circles, notebooks scribbled with Enochian script. Rory poured tea from a chipped pot, the steam curling like unspoken accusations. "Talk." He leaned against the doorframe, suit jacket straining across his chest. "Evan's allied with a minor lordling from Avaros. Petty, but persistent. They know about you—your out-of-the-box mind, as Eva calls it. Leverage against me." Her hand stilled on the mug. Leverage. That's what she'd been, hadn't she? A human spark in his demonic game. But the attraction—God, the way he'd kissed her wrist scar, murmuring French endearments as he entered her slow and deep, worlds colliding in gasps and shudders. Hurt had cracked it open: his silence after Evan's last attack, her pride demanding escape. "Why me?" She turned, meeting those mismatched eyes. Amber pleaded; black commanded. "You could've warned Eva. Or Silas." "Because it's you, Aurora." His voice dropped, rawer than she'd heard it. He straightened, closing the distance in two strides. The cane clattered against a bookshelf, forgotten. "From the moment you delivered that parcel to my club—Yu-Fei's finest dumplings, if memory serves—you saw through the suit. Called me 'the Frenchman' with that Cardiff bite. We parted because I feared dragging you under. My blood... it's not gentle." She set the mug down, porcelain clinking. Inches separated them now, his heat radiating through damp wool. "Complicated terms? You mean you lied. Said you needed space, then vanished." "I lied to protect you." His hand rose, hesitating before cupping her jaw. Thumb brushed her lower lip, callused from cane-grip yet impossibly tender. "But I never stopped wanting this." The dam cracked. Rory surged forward, fisting his lapels, dragging his mouth to hers. The kiss was fury and famine—lips crashing, tongues warring as months of pent-up ache unleashed. He tasted of rain and sin, groaning into her as she backed him against the wall. Books toppled in a cascade, Ptolemy scattering with an indignant yowl. Lucien's arms banded her waist, lifting her effortlessly. Her legs hooked around him, skirt riding up as he spun them toward the sagging sofa buried under scrolls. "Rory," he rasped against her throat, teeth grazing the pulse point that leaped for him. "Tell me to stop." "Don't you dare." She yanked his shirt open, buttons pinging off teacups. His chest was a map of faded infernal brands, pale skin marked by a life straddling realms. Her fingers traced them, nails digging as his mouth found her breast through lace, sucking hard enough to arch her back. He lowered her to the sofa, scrolls crunching beneath. The cane lay abandoned, blade-end glinting. His hands—surgeon-precise—shoved her sweater up, skirt higher, fingers delving between her thighs with unerring accuracy. She was soaked, gasping as he circled her clit, amber eye locked on her face while the black one burned with possession. "Missed this," he murmured, voice wrecked. "Missed you clenching around me, crying my name." She bucked, chasing friction, but pulled him down. "Shut up and prove it." Their mouths met again, sloppy and desperate, as he freed himself—thick, hot length pressing insistent at her entrance. No barriers; trust forged in fire. He thrust in slow, stretching her exquisitely, both shuddering at the reunion. Rory's heels dug into his thighs, urging deeper. Rhythm built—hard snaps of hips, the wet slap echoing over Ptolemy's distant complaints. His heterochromatic gaze never left hers, amber warm with vulnerability, black fierce with claim. Words tumbled unsaid: hurts aired in moans, fears fucked away in escalating frenzy. She came first, shattering around him with a keening cry, nails scoring his shoulders. Lucien followed, burying deep with a guttural curse in French, flooding her as tremors wracked them both. They collapsed, tangled and sweat-slick, breaths mingling in the book-choked air. His forehead rested on hers, cane forgotten nearby. "Not done," he whispered, echoing her earlier barb. "Never were." Rory traced his jaw, heart steadying. Evan loomed, shadows waited—but here, in Eva's chaotic flat, complicated terms rewrote themselves. "Then stay. Help me fight." His smile was genuine, crooked. "Always, mon cœur." Outside, rain drummed Brick Lane, but inside, the deadbolts held firm against the night.
created_at"2026-02-20T20:04:04.21Z" 2/20/2026, 8:04:04 PM
model"x-ai/grok-4.1-fast"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency296
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time41879
tokens_prompt808
tokens_completion2814
native_tokens_prompt880
native_tokens_completion3068
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning772
native_tokens_cached151
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.00168735
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9821aa0e-dce3-4c27-9716-161359123d0b"
id"b294bb7a-9ea8-5e67-9692-e846e9b6141d"
is_byokfalse
latency64
model_permaslug"x-ai/grok-4.1-fast"
provider_name"xAI"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771617844-MhrnLCQC52qxrdHFtL9t"
upstream_id"b294bb7a-9ea8-5e67-9692-e846e9b6141d"
total_cost0.00168735
cache_discount0.00002265
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"xAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags17
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Their mouths met again [again]"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.472
leniency0.944
rawRatio0.059
effectiveRatio0.056
94.24% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1735
totalAiIsmAdverbs2
found
0
adverb"lightly"
count1
1
adverb"softly"
count1
highlights
0"lightly"
1"softly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
4.90% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1735
totalAiIsms33
found
0
word"echoing"
count3
1
word"measured"
count1
2
word"pounding"
count1
3
word"gleaming"
count1
4
word"abyssal"
count1
5
word"intensity"
count1
6
word"reminder"
count1
7
word"velvet"
count1
8
word"affection"
count1
9
word"sanctuary"
count1
10
word"predator"
count1
11
word"stomach"
count1
12
word"shattered"
count1
13
word"tracing"
count2
14
word"chill"
count1
15
word"flickered"
count1
16
word"pulse"
count2
17
word"lilt"
count1
18
word"magnetic"
count1
19
word"unspoken"
count1
20
word"silence"
count1
21
word"porcelain"
count1
22
word"traced"
count2
23
word"glinting"
count1
24
word"delving"
count1
25
word"clenching"
count1
26
word"loomed"
count1
27
word"chaotic"
count1
highlights
0"echoing"
1"measured"
2"pounding"
3"gleaming"
4"abyssal"
5"intensity"
6"reminder"
7"velvet"
8"affection"
9"sanctuary"
10"predator"
11"stomach"
12"shattered"
13"tracing"
14"chill"
15"flickered"
16"pulse"
17"lilt"
18"magnetic"
19"unspoken"
20"silence"
21"porcelain"
22"traced"
23"glinting"
24"delving"
25"clenching"
26"loomed"
27"chaotic"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences109
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences109
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences129
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen43
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1691
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions16
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions56
wordCount1406
uniqueNames24
maxNameDensity0.64
worstName"Lucien"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Eva6
Ptolemy6
London2
Rory7
Moreau1
Cardiff1
Marseille1
Mayfair1
Evan5
Lucien9
Rain1
Brick2
Lane2
Golden1
Empress1
Avaros1
Carter1
Jennifer1
Welsh1
Enochian1
God1
French2
Amber1
Thumb1
persons
0"Eva"
1"Ptolemy"
2"Rory"
3"Moreau"
4"Evan"
5"Lucien"
6"Rain"
7"Empress"
8"Carter"
9"Jennifer"
10"Amber"
11"Thumb"
places
0"London"
1"Cardiff"
2"Marseille"
3"Brick"
4"Lane"
5"Golden"
6"Avaros"
globalScore1
windowScore1
72.68% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences97
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"felt like sanctuary"
1"not quite a smile, more a predator's assessment"
2"as if arbitrating"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount1691
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences129
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs35
mean48.31
std26.59
cv0.55
sampleLengths
096
192
230
3139
451
533
657
774
896
949
1045
1142
1247
1332
1438
1574
1635
1735
1861
1918
2067
2129
2230
2356
2446
2550
2652
2714
2837
2947
3044
3129
3224
338
3414
98.83% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount2
totalSentences109
matches
0"been, hadn't"
1"was soaked"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs267
matches(empty)
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount21
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences17
totalSentences129
ratio0.132
matches
0"The air inside reeked of curry spices seeping up from the restaurant below—cumin and turmeric clinging to every book-strewn surface—and Ptolemy, Eva's tabby cat, wound around her ankles with an insistent meow."
1"Those eyes—one amber, gleaming like polished citrine, the other black as abyssal ink—locked onto hers with unnerving intensity."
2"Five months since she'd stormed out of his Mayfair penthouse, his demon-tainted scent—smoke and oud—clinging to her skin like a curse."
3"Then the hurt—the way he'd vanished into his \"business\" after her ex, Evan, had shown up snarling threats, leaving her to fend off the bruises alone."
4"Eva's flat wasn't hers—cramped one-bedroom chaos of stacked books, yellowed scrolls pinned to walls, research notes fluttering like trapped moths—but it felt like sanctuary."
5"Evan—the abusive shadow she'd run from, the reason she'd crashed into Eva's life and this cluttered haven on Brick Lane."
6"Lucien's world was real—demons from Avaros, brokers like him trading secrets in tailcoated shadows."
7"\"Language, Rory. We're not children.\" But his gaze dropped, tracing the line of her neck, the swell of her breasts under the sweater—hunger undisguised."
8"The flat enveloped him awkwardly—his broad shoulders brushing stacks of occult tomes, his height forcing a slight stoop under the low ceiling."
9"But the attraction—God, the way he'd kissed her wrist scar, murmuring French endearments as he entered her slow and deep, worlds colliding in gasps and shudders."
10"Amber pleaded; black commanded."
11"The kiss was fury and famine—lips crashing, tongues warring as months of pent-up ache unleashed."
12"His hands—surgeon-precise—shoved her sweater up, skirt higher, fingers delving between her thighs with unerring accuracy."
13"\"Shut up and prove it.\" Their mouths met again, sloppy and desperate, as he freed himself—thick, hot length pressing insistent at her entrance."
14"No barriers; trust forged in fire."
15"Rhythm built—hard snaps of hips, the wet slap echoing over Ptolemy's distant complaints."
16"Evan loomed, shadows waited—but here, in Eva's chaotic flat, complicated terms rewrote themselves."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1111
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount29
adverbRatio0.026102610261026102
lyAdverbCount8
lyAdverbRatio0.0072007200720072
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences129
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences129
mean13.11
std7.41
cv0.565
sampleLengths
022
132
219
323
414
52
620
720
818
918
1019
1111
1215
1325
142
1521
1632
1726
1818
1938
2013
215
2216
2312
2413
2524
265
2715
2811
2916
3022
3113
3212
333
3420
3515
3613
371
3830
3914
4017
413
4214
4315
4410
4513
4622
476
4817
498
86.30% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats2
diversityRatio0.5271317829457365
totalSentences129
uniqueOpeners68
95.24% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount3
totalSentences105
matches
0"Then the hurt—the way he'd"
1"Instead, he tilted his head,"
2"Then, with deliberate slowness, he"
ratio0.029
56.19% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount43
totalSentences105
matches
0"It was past ten on"
1"She yanked the door open,"
2"His ivory-handled cane rested lightly"
3"he said, his voice a"
4"Her heart slammed against her"
5"They'd burned hot and fast:"
6"She kept her voice cool,"
7"He didn't flinch, didn't smirk."
8"He leaned on his cane,"
9"His black eye seemed to"
10"Her stomach twisted."
11"She crossed her arms, the"
12"He stepped closer, invading her"
13"Her pulse thrummed in her"
14"She hated how her body"
15"He moved with fluid grace,"
16"she muttered, retreating to the"
17"He leaned against the doorframe,"
18"Her hand stilled on the"
19"She turned, meeting those mismatched"
ratio0.41
36.19% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount89
totalSentences105
matches
0"Aurora's fingers fumbled with the"
1"The air inside reeked of"
2"It was past ten on"
3"She yanked the door open,"
4"The sight of him hit"
5"Platinum blond hair slicked back"
6"His ivory-handled cane rested lightly"
7"Those eyes—one amber, gleaming like"
8"he said, his voice a"
9"Her heart slammed against her"
10"The small crescent scar on"
11"They'd burned hot and fast:"
12"Things left unsaid: her fear"
13"She kept her voice cool,"
14"Ptolemy slunk past her legs,"
15"He didn't flinch, didn't smirk."
16"The word snapped out sharper"
17"Eva's flat wasn't hers—cramped one-bedroom"
18"Lucien's lips curved, not quite"
19"He leaned on his cane,"
ratio0.848
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences105
matches(empty)
ratio0
85.25% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences62
technicalSentenceCount5
matches
0"Platinum blond hair slicked back impeccably, not a strand disturbed by the rain that glistened on his tailored charcoal suit."
1"Attraction had ignited in the spaces between danger: his fingers tracing her scar in the dark, her nails raking his back as heterochromatic eyes bored into hers…"
2"Ptolemy leaped onto a nearby stack of books, tail flicking as if arbitrating."
3"The flat enveloped him awkwardly—his broad shoulders brushing stacks of occult tomes, his height forcing a slight stoop under the low ceiling."
4"Rory surged forward, fisting his lapels, dragging his mouth to hers."
36.76% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags17
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"he rasped, teeth grazing the pulse point that leaped for him"
1"She yanked, buttons pinging off teacups"
2"he murmured, voice wrecked"
38.89% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags5
fancyCount4
fancyTags
0"The word snapped (snap)"
1"she muttered (mutter)"
2"he murmured (murmur)"
3"he whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.139
leniency0.278
rawRatio0.8
effectiveRatio0.222
80.1824%