Run: 2026-02-24-01KJ8X03AKMSR72N015S6J1S8V

Run Details

Model:
Aion 2.0
Duration:
1m 27s
Cost:
$0.006340
Provider:
AionLabs

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The air in the alley behind Silas’ bar tasted of wet brick and old garbage, but the shimmer in front of them tasted of nothing at all. Aurora — Rory to her friends, and she desperately needed to remember she had friends here — stood with her hand pressed against the faint distortion in the air. It felt like pressing against cold, still water that refused to break the surface. The Heartstone Pendant against her chest was no longer just warm; it was a live coal, its deep crimson gem pulsing with a slow, insistent rhythm that matched the quickening beat under her ribs. “It is here,” Isolde said, her voice as soft as the brush of moth wings. The Half-Fae seer stood a few feet away, her silver hair seeming to gather what little light the overcast London sky offered. She left no imprint on the damp asphalt. “The way is thin. The solstice approaches, and the Veil dreams.” Nyx, a humanoid silhouette of concentrated darkness leaning against the brick wall, stirred. “Dreams are often nightmares,” they whispered, the sound seeming to come from just behind Rory’s left ear. “This one smells of spice and rot. An old recipe.” Rory took a steadying breath, the cool-headedness she was known for feeling like a thin veneer over a deep, churning well of fear. She’d left Cardiff to escape a different kind of nightmare. This one, with its whispers and shimmering air and a pendant that beat like a second heart, was somehow more real and less comprehensible. “Right. So we step through. What’s the protocol? Do we hold hands?” “The protocol is not to be eaten,” Nyx murmured, but they peeled themself from the wall, their form solidifying into something more defined, though still carved from shadow. Their faintly glowing violet eyes regarded the rift. “I will go first. My substance is… flexible.” Before Rory could argue, Nyx stepped forward and simply melted into the distortion. There was no sound, no flash of light. One moment they were there, the next they were gone, absorbed by the cold-water surface. Isolde’s pale lavender eyes met Rory’s. “The path is walked by putting one foot before the other. The destination is never certain.” A faint, sad smile touched her lips. “You carry the blade I gave you?” Rory’s hand went to the small of her back, where the Fae-forged dagger rested in a leather sheath. The moonsilver was always cold, a constant, reassuring chill against her skin. She nodded. “Then walk, Aurora Carter. And do not look back. Looking back is for poets and ghosts.” Rory clenched her jaw, touched the crescent scar on her left wrist out of habit, and stepped into the shimmer. The world did not so much tear as it *unfolded*. The cold pressure gave way to a sudden, overwhelming warmth. The scent of garbage was replaced by a cacophony of smells so rich and layered it made her head spin: baking bread, honey, roasting meat, exotic flowers, fermenting fruit, and beneath it all, a deep, earthy scent like turned soil and mycelium. She stumbled, her boots landing not on asphalt but on soft, springy turf. The sky was not grey, but a warm, luminous amber, as if the air itself were infused with late afternoon sunlight, though there was no visible sun. She stood in a field of grass that was a shade of purple so deep it was almost black, dotted with flowers that glowed with their own inner light, soft blues and yellows. “Breathe,” Nyx’s whisper came from beside her. “The air is safe. It is merely… indulgent.” Rory forced herself to inhale. The air was thick, humid, and sweet. It felt like drinking syrup. Isolde appeared beside them, seamless and silent. Her lavender eyes scanned the horizon, her expression unreadable. “Dymas,” she said, the word a sigh. “The realm of the insatiable palate.” They were at the edge of a vineyard. But the vines were unlike any Rory had seen. The trunks were thick and gnarled like ancient oak, and the grapes hanging in heavy clusters were the size of plums, their skins gleaming like polished amethyst. Beyond the vineyard, Rory could see orchards where fruits in impossible shapes and colors dangled from silver-barked trees. In the distance, rising from a mist of what looked like steam and smoke, were grand, sprawling structures of golden stone and polished wood. “It’s beautiful,” Rory heard herself say, and immediately felt foolish. It was a trap of aesthetics. She remembered Evan’s charming smile, the flowers he’d bring before his fists would fly. Beauty was often a wrapper for poison. “It is consumption made landscape,” Isolde corrected gently. “Every sight, every scent, is designed to provoke want. To see is to hunger.” As if to prove her point, Rory’s stomach gave an involuntary growl. The smell of baking bread was so acute it brought water to her mouth. She shook her head, focusing. “Which way?” The Heartstone Pendant throbbed, a sharp, almost painful pulse. She looked down. The crimson gem’s inner glow had intensified, and it was pulling very slightly, like a compass needle, toward the distant structures. “It seems your stone has an appetite of its own,” Nyx observed. They were half-insubstantial, their shadowy form blending with the long, dark grass. “Toward the kitchens, I would wager. Where the Prince of this place holds his court.” They began to walk. The ground was soft, almost spongy. Rory noticed that the glowing flowers closed their petals as she passed, then slowly reopened. The air hummed with a low, pervasive sound—not insects, but a distant, melodic chiming, like thousands of tiny bells being stirred by the wind. They passed into the orchard. Up close, the trees were even more alien. One bore fruit that looked like crystalline pears, their translucent skins revealing a swirling, liquid core. Another’s fruit resembled clenched fists of burnished copper. Rory reached out, curiosity overriding caution, and lightly touched one. It was warm, and she felt a faint vibration, like a heartbeat. “I would not,” Isolde said, not looking back. “To taste the fruit of Dymas is to crave it forever. The hunger it leaves behind is a hollow no mortal meal can fill.” Rory snatched her hand back, wiping her fingers on her jeans. They came upon a path of smooth, white stones that wound through the orchard. Lining the path were statues, but they were not of stone. They were figures of what Rory first thought were elaborate, life-sized marzipan creations. Then she saw the subtle rise and fall of a chest, the blink of a glassy eye. They were people—or what had been people—frozen in poses of ecstatic consumption, their mouths open in silent laughter or sighs, their hands clutching at invisible goblets and plates. Their skin had a waxy, candied sheen. A cold knot tightened in Rory’s stomach. “The satisfied,” Nyx whispered, drifting past a statue of a woman caught mid-bite, her expression one of rapture. “Or so they are called. Their wants have been fulfilled to the point of permanence.” “They’re alive?” Rory asked, her voice hushed. “In a manner of speaking. They feel nothing but the echo of their last, perfect taste. It is a kind of paradise. And a kind of hell.” The unease that had been a background hum now crescendoed into a steady drum of alarm. This wasn’t just an alien place; it was a digestive system, a realm that consumed desire itself. She gripped the hilt of the Fae blade, the cold metal a welcome anchor. The chiming grew louder, mixed now with other sounds: the clatter of pans, the hiss of steam, a low, rhythmic chopping. The path sloped downward, opening into a vast, natural amphitheater. Below them, spread out like a model, was a bustling kitchen-city. Dozens of open-air hearths and clay ovens glowed with fire. Countless figures moved with frantic, precise energy—stirring enormous pots, turning spits laden with unrecognizable beasts, kneading dough on slabs of marble. But the workers moved in utter silence. No shouts, no chatter, only the sounds of their labor. “The helbound,” Isolde said. “Souls contracted from your world. Their punishment is to create perfection they are forever forbidden to consume.” As Rory watched, one figure, a man with a gaunt, focused face, carefully placed a finished, magnificent pie on a long table overflowing with dishes. He stared at it for a long moment, his hands trembling, before turning back to his station with robotic resignation. A procession was winding its way through the kitchen, heading toward a grand pavilion of silk and gold at the far end. Figures in lavish, colorful robes carried platters aloft. On one, a whole beast roasted, its skin crackling and glistening. On another, a tower of frosted cakes shimmered. On a third, a fountain flowed with dark, red wine. The Heartstone Pendant gave a violent throb, so strong it felt like a kick. Rory gasped, her hand flying to her chest. “It is not the food it senses,” Isolde said, her eyes fixed on the pavilion. “It is the gate. The way deeper. Or the way home. They are often the same.” She turned her pale gaze on Rory. “The Prince of this place sleeps after his great feasts. The path to his pavilion is open. But we are not guests. We are crumbs on the table. We must move as shadows move.” Nyx coalesced fully, their violet eyes glowing. “I can be a shadow. The girl… less so.” Rory looked down at the bustling, silent kitchen, at the path of white stones that led down into it, lined with more of the waxy, ecstatic statues. The air was thick enough to chew. Every instinct told her to run, to find the cold, grey, familiar misery of London. But the pendant burned, a promise or a threat. She had left one life running. She would not run from this. “Then we don’t walk on the path,” she said, her mind clicking into that cool, quick-thinking space. She pointed to the side of the amphitheater, where thick, fragrant bushes with broad, waxy leaves grew in a tangled mass. “We go through the scenery. Stay low, move fast. And if anything asks, we’re just here to deliver a takeaway.” A flicker of what might have been amusement passed through Nyx’s shadowy form. Isolde simply nodded. “The clever mouse avoids the feast,” she said. “It nibbles the threads of the tapestry instead.” Rory took the lead, stepping off the white stones and into the alien, wondrous, terrifying garden of Dymas, the pendant a burning star against her chest, guiding them deeper into the hunger of the world.
created_at"2026-02-24T22:40:57.18Z" 2/24/2026, 10:40:57 PM
model"aion-labs/aion-2.0-20260223"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency2240
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time86592
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion3565
native_tokens_prompt1661
native_tokens_completion3132
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning833
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
usage0.00634
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"1e93b0bb-eb0f-49bc-8fda-947105413b86"
id"ff12f1b0-3d51-4b82-9aee-c258bc951cee"
is_byokfalse
latency133
model_permaslug"aion-labs/aion-2.0-20260223"
provider_name"AionLabs"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771972857-7kRQam7gX39EbYROlPF4"
upstream_id"ff12f1b0-3d51-4b82-9aee-c258bc951cee"
total_cost0.00634
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"AionLabs"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags17
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Isolde corrected gently [gently]"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.472
leniency0.944
rawRatio0.059
effectiveRatio0.056
83.17% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1783
totalAiIsmAdverbs6
found
0
adverb"gently"
count1
1
adverb"very"
count1
2
adverb"slightly"
count1
3
adverb"slowly"
count1
4
adverb"lightly"
count1
5
adverb"carefully"
count1
highlights
0"gently"
1"very"
2"slightly"
3"slowly"
4"lightly"
5"carefully"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
27.09% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1783
totalAiIsms26
found
0
word"churning"
count1
1
word"chill"
count1
2
word"warmth"
count1
3
word"cacophony"
count1
4
word"whisper"
count1
5
word"scanned"
count1
6
word"unreadable"
count1
7
word"gleaming"
count1
8
word"stomach"
count2
9
word"throbbed"
count1
10
word"pulse"
count1
11
word"crystalline"
count1
12
word"echo"
count1
13
word"perfect"
count1
14
word"desire"
count1
15
word"rhythmic"
count1
16
word"marble"
count1
17
word"silence"
count1
18
word"silk"
count1
19
word"glistening"
count1
20
word"shimmered"
count1
21
word"throb"
count1
22
word"familiar"
count1
23
word"flicker"
count1
24
word"tapestry"
count1
highlights
0"churning"
1"chill"
2"warmth"
3"cacophony"
4"whisper"
5"scanned"
6"unreadable"
7"gleaming"
8"stomach"
9"throbbed"
10"pulse"
11"crystalline"
12"echo"
13"perfect"
14"desire"
15"rhythmic"
16"marble"
17"silence"
18"silk"
19"glistening"
20"shimmered"
21"throb"
22"familiar"
23"flicker"
24"tapestry"
66.67% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches2
maxInWindow2
found
0
label"clenched jaw/fists"
count2
highlights
0"clenched her jaw"
1"clenched fists"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences110
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences110
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"began to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences129
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen42
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans1
markdownWords1
totalWords1781
ratio0.001
matches
0"unfolded"
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions14
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
66.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions56
wordCount1403
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity1.64
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Aurora1
Rory23
Heartstone3
Pendant3
Half-Fae1
London2
Cardiff1
Nyx8
Fae-forged1
Evan1
Fae3
Dymas1
Isolde8
persons
0"Aurora"
1"Rory"
2"Pendant"
3"Nyx"
4"Evan"
5"Isolde"
places
0"London"
1"Cardiff"
2"Dymas"
globalScore0.68
windowScore0.667
19.79% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences96
glossingSentenceCount5
matches
0"felt like pressing against cold, still"
1"appeared beside them, seamless and silent"
2"looked like steam and smoke, were grand,"
3"looked like crystalline pears, their tran"
4"felt like a kick"
0.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches4
per1kWords2.246
wordCount1781
matches
0"not to be eaten,” Nyx murmured, but they peeled themself from the wall, their form solidifying i"
1"not on asphalt but on soft, springy turf"
2"not grey, but a warm, luminous amber, as if the air itself were infused wi"
3"not insects, but a distant, melodic chiming, like thousands of tiny bells bei"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount1
totalSentences129
matches
0"noticed that the"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs42
mean42.4
std24.01
cv0.566
sampleLengths
0104
156
240
369
444
536
636
732
816
920
1010
1165
1260
1315
1417
1529
1686
1737
1822
1933
2033
2139
2249
2359
2432
2511
2697
2733
287
2927
3047
3190
3221
3345
3459
3522
3672
3716
3870
3958
4032
4135
89.31% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences110
matches
0"was known"
1"were gone"
2"was replaced"
3"were infused"
4"being stirred"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount2
totalVerbs231
matches
0"was pulling"
1"was winding"
9.97% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount6
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences6
totalSentences129
ratio0.047
matches
0"Aurora — Rory to her friends, and she desperately needed to remember she had friends here — stood with her hand pressed against the faint distortion in the air."
1"The Heartstone Pendant against her chest was no longer just warm; it was a live coal, its deep crimson gem pulsing with a slow, insistent rhythm that matched the quickening beat under her ribs."
2"The air hummed with a low, pervasive sound—not insects, but a distant, melodic chiming, like thousands of tiny bells being stirred by the wind."
3"They were people—or what had been people—frozen in poses of ecstatic consumption, their mouths open in silent laughter or sighs, their hands clutching at invisible goblets and plates."
4"This wasn’t just an alien place; it was a digestive system, a realm that consumed desire itself."
5"Countless figures moved with frantic, precise energy—stirring enormous pots, turning spits laden with unrecognizable beasts, kneading dough on slabs of marble."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount293
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount7
adverbRatio0.023890784982935155
lyAdverbCount1
lyAdverbRatio0.0034129692832764505
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences129
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences129
mean13.81
std7.91
cv0.573
sampleLengths
027
129
214
334
415
522
68
711
813
917
1010
1123
1210
1324
1412
1528
168
178
1813
198
2015
216
2223
237
2418
2512
262
2716
2820
2910
3010
3142
3213
3327
3433
357
368
375
387
395
407
419
427
436
448
459
4627
4718
4824
4910
50.65% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats8
diversityRatio0.34108527131782945
totalSentences129
uniqueOpeners44
31.45% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences106
matches
0"Then she saw the subtle"
ratio0.009
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount30
totalSentences106
matches
0"It felt like pressing against"
1"She left no imprint on"
2"they whispered, the sound seeming"
3"She’d left Cardiff to escape"
4"Their faintly glowing violet eyes"
5"She stumbled, her boots landing"
6"She stood in a field"
7"It felt like drinking syrup."
8"Her lavender eyes scanned the"
9"she said, the word a"
10"They were at the edge"
11"It was a trap of"
12"She remembered Evan’s charming smile,"
13"She shook her head, focusing."
14"She looked down."
15"They were half-insubstantial, their shadowy"
16"They began to walk."
17"They passed into the orchard."
18"It was warm, and she"
19"They came upon a path"
ratio0.283
59.06% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount85
totalSentences106
matches
0"The air in the alley"
1"Aurora — Rory to her"
2"It felt like pressing against"
3"The Heartstone Pendant against her"
4"Isolde said, her voice as"
5"The Half-Fae seer stood a"
6"She left no imprint on"
7"Nyx, a humanoid silhouette of"
8"they whispered, the sound seeming"
9"Rory took a steadying breath,"
10"She’d left Cardiff to escape"
11"This one, with its whispers"
12"Nyx murmured, but they peeled"
13"Their faintly glowing violet eyes"
14"Isolde’s pale lavender eyes met"
15"A faint, sad smile touched"
16"Rory’s hand went to the"
17"The moonsilver was always cold,"
18"Rory clenched her jaw, touched"
19"The world did not so"
ratio0.802
94.34% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount2
totalSentences106
matches
0"Before Rory could argue, Nyx"
1"As if to prove her"
ratio0.019
19.70% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences58
technicalSentenceCount10
matches
0"It felt like pressing against cold, still water that refused to break the surface."
1"The Heartstone Pendant against her chest was no longer just warm; it was a live coal, its deep crimson gem pulsing with a slow, insistent rhythm that matched th…"
2"The sky was not grey, but a warm, luminous amber, as if the air itself were infused with late afternoon sunlight, though there was no visible sun."
3"She stood in a field of grass that was a shade of purple so deep it was almost black, dotted with flowers that glowed with their own inner light, soft blues and…"
4"The trunks were thick and gnarled like ancient oak, and the grapes hanging in heavy clusters were the size of plums, their skins gleaming like polished amethyst…"
5"One bore fruit that looked like crystalline pears, their translucent skins revealing a swirling, liquid core."
6"He stared at it for a long moment, his hands trembling, before turning back to his station with robotic resignation."
7"On one, a whole beast roasted, its skin crackling and glistening."
8"Rory looked down at the bustling, silent kitchen, at the path of white stones that led down into it, lined with more of the waxy, ecstatic statues."
9"Rory took the lead, stepping off the white stones and into the alien, wondrous, terrifying garden of Dymas, the pendant a burning star against her chest, guidin…"
7.35% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags17
uselessAdditionCount4
matches
0"she said, the word a sigh"
1"Isolde said, not looking back"
2"Rory asked, her voice hushed"
3"she said, her mind clicking into that cool, quick-thinking space"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags14
fancyCount6
fancyTags
0"they whispered (whisper)"
1"Nyx murmured (murmur)"
2"Rory heard (hear)"
3"Isolde corrected gently (correct)"
4"Nyx observed (observe)"
5"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences36
tagDensity0.389
leniency0.778
rawRatio0.429
effectiveRatio0.333
70.8405%