Run: 2026-03-03-01KJTZ8EGBJGDHH6T60B7JRBX5

Run Details

Duration:
6m 11s
Cost:
$0.005164
Provider:
Seed

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Rory’s bicycle clattered to a stop against the weathered oak post at the edge of Richmond Park’s overgrown northern fringe, the strap of her Golden Empress delivery bag digging harshly into her shoulder. The afternoon sun had dipped behind the park’s ancient beeches, painting the sky in soft pink and orange, but she’d tucked her delivery order of sweet and sour tofu into the bike’s rear basket, safe from the chill autumn breeze. She’d clocked out three hours early, chasing the faint, thrumming warmth of the Heartstone Pendant tucked under her cream sweater, the silver chain chafing the base of her throat. The crescent scar on her left wrist prickled, a familiar tingle that had started the day a stranger in a frayed black coat had left the velvet pouch containing the gem on her doormat, no note, no follow-up. She’d worn it every night since, waking from vivid dreams of amber skies and long tables heaped with food she couldn’t name, shadows moving where there should have been no light. It had been Nyx who’d put two and two together, a week prior, when the pendant had pulsed so violently it had burned through her sweater while she was restocking napkins at Silas’ bar downstairs from her flat. They’d manifested from the shadow of the beer cooler then, their tall, shadowy form solidifying until faint violet eyes glowed through the dark fabric of their thrifted black hoodie. “You’re being pulled,” they’d whispered, their voice like wind through a cracked window, the sound making her skin prickle even as she relaxed—she’d gotten used to their quiet, lulling tone, the way their shadow always seemed to linger just close enough to feel safe. “Follow the pulse. Take the blade Isolde gave you. It’ll keep the rifts from swallowing you whole.” She’d stuffed the slender moonsilver dagger into her jacket pocket then, its cold metal a steadying weight against her hip, and now, as she locked her bike, she ran a thumb over the scar on her wrist, a nervous habit. She’d spotted the circle of gnarled oaks ten feet ahead, their bark silver with lichen, twisted into a perfect ring she could have sworn wasn’t there that morning. She’d walked this path a dozen times, on delivery runs to the park’s older benches, never noticing a single standing stone, let alone a ring of ancient oaks. Her breath caught, and she reached up to tug the pendant out from under her sweater. The crimson gem glowed brighter than she’d ever seen it, thrumming against her sternum, warm enough to seep through her skin. “Come on,” she called over her shoulder, and a shift of shadow resolved into Nyx at her side, their form solidifying until she could see the faint outline of their sharp, angular features, the violet glow of their eyes cutting through the dim twilight. Despite having seen them a dozen times, the sight still made her chest tighten: they were tall, just over six feet, their body a living silhouette that shifted like smoke, their hoodie hanging loose on their frame, their hands long and shadowy with no visible fingers. “You sure this isn’t a bad idea?” “Bad ideas are what got you out of Cardiff in the first place,” Nyx whispered, and Rory huffed a laugh, even as her knees felt weak. She stepped over the threshold of the oak circle, her boot crunching on a bed of moss that smelled like jasmine and ripe blackberries—wildflowers, she realized, when her eyes landed on a patch of bluebells growing at the base of one oak, their petals glowing faint violet, even though late October in London should have left them long dead. The world shifted. One second she was standing in a damp, overgrown park patch, the air smelling like damp leaf mold and diesel fumes. The next, warm amber light wrapped around her, soft and golden, like sitting by a campfire on a summer night. The oak circle vanished, replaced by rows upon rows of iridescent grapevines, their leaves shifting between deep purple and burnished gold as they twisted up black iron trellises that curled like thorns. A stream glowed like liquid honey cut through with amethyst, winding between the vines, and fireflies the size of sparrows buzzed above the water, their lights flickering green. Rory let out a quiet gasp, and she couldn’t stop herself from stepping forward, her boots sinking into soft, green grass that felt like velvet underfoot. She’d never seen anything like it—wildflowers bloomed in every color, clustered at the base of every trellis, even as far as her eyes could see, and the air was so sweet it made her head spin a little, like she’d inhaled a whiff of something alcoholic. Nyx stepped beside her, their shadowy form trailing a little in the warm grass, their violet eyes scanning the distance, their shoulders tensed slightly. “This is Dymas,” they whispered. “The gluttony realm of Hel. Your pendant is leading you straight to the rift that brought us here.” Rory’s eyes widened, and she fumbled with the pendant, pressing a finger to the warm gem. “Hel? I thought that was just… stories. My dad rants about supernatural rifts on the news sometimes, but this is…” She trailed off, gesturing around her, and Nyx nodded. “Stories don’t usually include amber skies and honey streams,” they said. “This place is all excess, all indulgence. The feasts here last for centuries, and the staff are bound souls, sentenced to work here for their sins of gluttony or greed.” The distant sound of clinking glass and laughter grew louder with every step, polished and loud, like an upper-class wedding toast. Rory turned her head, and spotted a grand hall of dark black stone, its arches draped in ivy with leaves that glowed the same amber as the sky. Long tables stretched the length of the hall, heaped with food that made her stomach growl despite her unease: glistening roasted meats piled high on pewter plates, towers of fruit that glowed faint crimson, goblets filled with a liquid that shimmered bright blue. A line of figures in white aprons moved between the tables, carrying trays of goblets, their hands pale as bone, their eyes hollow, no irises or pupils. “Helbound souls,” Nyx murmured, following her gaze. “They can’t see us unless we make ourselves known. Stay close.” Rory’s fingers brushed the Fae-Forged Blade in her jacket pocket, the cold metal a steadying reminder. She pulled it out, holding it loosely in her palm, and was surprised to see it glow faint silver in the amber light, its slender leaf-shaped blade catching the glow of the firefly sprites. “Isolde was right,” she said, her voice quiet. “It’s glowing.” “Moonsilver always glows near Hel’s realms,” Nyx said, nodding at the blade. “Especially Dymas. This place feeds on desire, on the urge to eat and drink until you can’t anymore. The blade will ward off any demons or bound spirits that try to bind you here.” They walked further into the vineyard, the sound of the feast growing louder with every step. Rory spotted an orchard off to the side, its trees heavy with peaches that glowed bright red, their scent so strong it made her mouth water. She reached out to pluck one, but Nyx caught her wrist, their shadowy fingers cool against her skin. “Don’t,” they said. “The fruit here is grown with Hel’s magic. Eating it will tie you to this realm. You’ll never get back to your flat, your deliveries, your mom’s Welsh cakes, any of it.” Rory pulled her hand back quickly, her cheeks heating with embarrassment. “Right. Sorry. Habit, I guess. I haven’t had a proper day off since I moved to London.” They continued walking, their boots crunching on the velvet grass, the firefly sprites circling around their heads. Rory spotted a small shed off to the side of the vineyard, its door propped open, and she saw a stack of white aprons folded on a table inside, the same ones the helbound staff were wearing. She peered closer, and spotted a name tag pinned to one of them: *Evan*. Her breath caught in her throat. It was the same name as her ex, the one she’d fled from, the one who’d grabbed her wrist hard enough to leave that crescent scar, the one who’d screamed at her for trying to leave him. She stumbled back, her knee hitting a grapevine trellis, and the thorny tendrils twisted around her calf, cold and sharp. She froze, expecting the helbound staff to turn and see her, but none of them did. They just kept walking, their trays clinking, their hollow eyes fixed on the feast hall, their steps slow and mechanical. Nyx stepped over, and the tendrils around her calf dissolved into shadow, their voice a low whisper in her ear. “You okay? That name—did he hurt you?” “Yeah,” Rory said, her voice shaking, and she wiped at her eyes with her free hand, embarrassed to be crying in this alien place. “He grabbed my wrist when I tried to leave. Left this scar. I thought I’d left him behind in Cardiff.” “This place feeds on your fears, Rory,” Nyx said, their shadowy hand resting lightly on her shoulder. “It’s using your grief against you. Don’t let it.” Rory took a deep breath, and she pressed a hand to her chest, feeling the Heartstone thrumming faster now, as if pulling her toward the feast hall. The gem was so hot now that it burned through her sweater, against her skin, and she could feel a pull, like a magnet drawing her toward the stone walls of the hall. She looked up, and spotted a faint shimmering distortion in the wall, a faint, wavering line that only she could see, thanks to the pendant. The faint shiver of the Veil, the metaphysical barrier between worlds, thinning almost to breaking point this close to the winter solstice. “There,” she said, pointing at the rift. “That’s the Veil?” Nyx nodded, their form shifting a little, as if they were straining to see it. “The Veil between worlds. It’s thinner here than anywhere else, especially this time of year. That’s why the Heartstone pulled us through. The Wardens should be monitoring this rift, but… they’re not here.” Rory followed their gaze, and sure enough, there were no Wardens in sight, no figures in the crisp blue uniforms she’d seen in news clips about supernatural breaches. The feast hall was full of guests, all human-looking, their faces flushed with laughter, eating and drinking without a care in the world, oblivious to the rift tearing open in their wall. As they drew closer to the feast hall, Rory spotted a chef standing next to a giant cauldron by the entrance, stirring a stew that bubbled with blue steam, the scent so rich it made her stomach growl so loud she was sure Nyx could hear it. The chef’s hands were gnarled, their skin pale, and they were wearing a white coat stained with sauce, their apron labeled *Belphegor’s Head Chef*. Nyx whispered that the chef was a former CEO who’d embezzled millions from his company, forcing his employees to take pay cuts until they quit, so he’d been sentenced here to cook for the realm’s ruler, forever stirring the same stew, forever serving the gluttonous guests. Rory peered into the cauldron, and saw chunks of meat that glowed bright red, floating in a broth that shimmered blue. One of the guests at a nearby table took a bite of a peach, and juice dripped down their chin, glowing the same blue as the broth. They laughed, and wiped their chin with the back of their hand, their skin flushed with excess. Then she saw him. A man in a tailored black suit, his smile too wide, his eyes too bright, standing at the entrance of the feast hall, watching her. He was tall, with dark hair and a goatee, and he wore a ring on his finger that glowed bright crimson, matching the Heartstone in her palm. His voice carried across the vineyard, soft and honeyed, even from a hundred feet away: “Welcome, travelers. You’ve come far for a taste of Dymas.” Rory froze, her hand tightening around the Fae Blade, her breath catching in her throat. Nyx stepped in front of her, their shadowy form spreading a little, their violet eyes narrowing at the man in the black suit. “Who are you?” The man laughed, a low, rich sound, and he stepped forward, his boots clicking on the velvet grass. “They call me Belphegor,” he said, his smile growing wider. “Ruler of this realm. And you, my dear, are wearing my Heartstone.”
created_at"2026-03-03T23:06:47.702Z" 3/3/2026, 11:06:47 PM
model"bytedance-seed/seed-2.0-mini-20260224"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency25127
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time371241
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion13748
native_tokens_prompt1692
native_tokens_completion12487
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning9700
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
usage0.005164
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9265aa87-9657-4d40-b9d7-2a70318e57d9"
id"021772579208107c8c5a5589555159fe1f6a4222aeb4c2b4e961f"
is_byokfalse
latency25127
model_permaslug"bytedance-seed/seed-2.0-mini-20260224"
provider_name"Seed"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1772579207-6RYmCaJ182Y8mmFaLiD4"
upstream_id"021772579208107c8c5a5589555159fe1f6a4222aeb4c2b4e961f"
total_cost0.005164
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Seed"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags17
adverbTagCount0
adverbTags(empty)
dialogueSentences31
tagDensity0.548
leniency1
rawRatio0
effectiveRatio0
90.59% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2126
totalAiIsmAdverbs4
found
0
adverb"slightly"
count1
1
adverb"loosely"
count1
2
adverb"quickly"
count1
3
adverb"lightly"
count1
highlights
0"slightly"
1"loosely"
2"quickly"
3"lightly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
43.56% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2126
totalAiIsms24
found
0
word"chill"
count1
1
word"warmth"
count1
2
word"familiar"
count1
3
word"velvet"
count4
4
word"pulsed"
count1
5
word"pulse"
count1
6
word"weight"
count1
7
word"perfect"
count1
8
word"resolved"
count1
9
word"scanning"
count1
10
word"stomach"
count2
11
word"glistening"
count1
12
word"shimmered"
count2
13
word"reminder"
count1
14
word"desire"
count1
15
word"mechanical"
count1
16
word"whisper"
count1
17
word"could feel"
count1
18
word"wavering"
count1
highlights
0"chill"
1"warmth"
2"familiar"
3"velvet"
4"pulsed"
5"pulse"
6"weight"
7"perfect"
8"resolved"
9"scanning"
10"stomach"
11"glistening"
12"shimmered"
13"reminder"
14"desire"
15"mechanical"
16"whisper"
17"could feel"
18"wavering"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count1
highlights
0"eyes widened"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells1
narrationSentences76
matches
0"was surprised"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences76
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences91
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen61
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans2
markdownWords4
totalWords2122
ratio0.002
matches
0"Evan"
1"Belphegor’s Head Chef"
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions18
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions48
wordCount1776
uniqueNames17
maxNameDensity0.84
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity2
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Richmond1
Park1
Golden1
Empress1
Heartstone3
Pendant1
Nyx14
Despite1
Rory15
October1
London1
Fae-Forged1
Blade2
Veil1
Wardens1
Head1
Fae2
persons
0"Golden"
1"Heartstone"
2"Pendant"
3"Nyx"
4"Despite"
5"Rory"
6"Head"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"London"
globalScore1
windowScore1
41.30% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences69
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"smelled like jasmine and ripe blackberries"
1"felt like velvet underfoot"
2"as if pulling her toward the feast hall"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount2122
matches(empty)
93.41% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount2
totalSentences91
matches
0"leave that crescent"
1"whispered that the"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs27
mean78.59
std42.21
cv0.537
sampleLengths
0171
1128
2133
397
485
53
6101
7119
845
941
10119
1118
1260
1346
1495
1528
16131
1763
1844
1926
20117
21108
22117
2365
2481
2541
2640
91.41% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount3
totalSentences76
matches
0"was surprised"
1"were gnarled"
2"been sentenced"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs281
matches
0"was standing"
1"were wearing"
2"were straining"
3"were wearing"
48.67% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount3
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences3
totalSentences91
ratio0.033
matches
0"“You’re being pulled,” they’d whispered, their voice like wind through a cracked window, the sound making her skin prickle even as she relaxed—she’d gotten used to their quiet, lulling tone, the way their shadow always seemed to linger just close enough to feel safe."
1"She stepped over the threshold of the oak circle, her boot crunching on a bed of moss that smelled like jasmine and ripe blackberries—wildflowers, she realized, when her eyes landed on a patch of bluebells growing at the base of one oak, their petals glowing faint violet, even though late October in London should have left them long dead."
2"She’d never seen anything like it—wildflowers bloomed in every color, clustered at the base of every trellis, even as far as her eyes could see, and the air was so sweet it made her head spin a little, like she’d inhaled a whiff of something alcoholic."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount486
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount12
adverbRatio0.024691358024691357
lyAdverbCount5
lyAdverbRatio0.0102880658436214
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences91
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences91
mean23.32
std12.75
cv0.547
sampleLengths
033
140
229
338
431
538
629
744
817
940
1028
1128
1216
1321
1444
1546
167
1726
1859
193
2021
2120
2232
2328
2426
2546
2624
275
2818
2916
3029
3111
3230
3321
3428
3543
3627
377
3811
3916
4034
418
422
4312
4434
4516
4626
4718
483
4932
54.95% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats5
diversityRatio0.3626373626373626
totalSentences91
uniqueOpeners33
45.66% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences73
matches
0"Then she saw him."
ratio0.014
55.62% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount30
totalSentences73
matches
0"She’d clocked out three hours"
1"She’d worn it every night"
2"It had been Nyx who’d"
3"They’d manifested from the shadow"
4"they’d whispered, their voice like"
5"She’d stuffed the slender moonsilver"
6"She’d spotted the circle of"
7"She’d walked this path a"
8"Her breath caught, and she"
9"she called over her shoulder,"
10"She stepped over the threshold"
11"She’d never seen anything like"
12"She trailed off, gesturing around"
13"She pulled it out, holding"
14"she said, her voice quiet"
15"They walked further into the"
16"She reached out to pluck"
17"They continued walking, their boots"
18"She peered closer, and spotted"
19"Her breath caught in her"
ratio0.411
0.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount68
totalSentences73
matches
0"Rory’s bicycle clattered to a"
1"The afternoon sun had dipped"
2"She’d clocked out three hours"
3"The crescent scar on her"
4"She’d worn it every night"
5"It had been Nyx who’d"
6"They’d manifested from the shadow"
7"they’d whispered, their voice like"
8"She’d stuffed the slender moonsilver"
9"She’d spotted the circle of"
10"She’d walked this path a"
11"Her breath caught, and she"
12"The crimson gem glowed brighter"
13"she called over her shoulder,"
14"Nyx whispered, and Rory huffed"
15"She stepped over the threshold"
16"The world shifted."
17"One second she was standing"
18"The next, warm amber light"
19"The oak circle vanished, replaced"
ratio0.932
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences73
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences56
technicalSentenceCount15
matches
0"The crescent scar on her left wrist prickled, a familiar tingle that had started the day a stranger in a frayed black coat had left the velvet pouch containing …"
1"Despite having seen them a dozen times, the sight still made her chest tighten: they were tall, just over six feet, their body a living silhouette that shifted …"
2"She stepped over the threshold of the oak circle, her boot crunching on a bed of moss that smelled like jasmine and ripe blackberries—wildflowers, she realized,…"
3"A stream glowed like liquid honey cut through with amethyst, winding between the vines, and fireflies the size of sparrows buzzed above the water, their lights …"
4"Rory let out a quiet gasp, and she couldn’t stop herself from stepping forward, her boots sinking into soft, green grass that felt like velvet underfoot."
5"Long tables stretched the length of the hall, heaped with food that made her stomach growl despite her unease: glistening roasted meats piled high on pewter pla…"
6"Rory spotted an orchard off to the side, its trees heavy with peaches that glowed bright red, their scent so strong it made her mouth water."
7"They continued walking, their boots crunching on the velvet grass, the firefly sprites circling around their heads."
8"They just kept walking, their trays clinking, their hollow eyes fixed on the feast hall, their steps slow and mechanical."
9"Rory took a deep breath, and she pressed a hand to her chest, feeling the Heartstone thrumming faster now, as if pulling her toward the feast hall."
10"Nyx nodded, their form shifting a little, as if they were straining to see it."
11"As they drew closer to the feast hall, Rory spotted a chef standing next to a giant cauldron by the entrance, stirring a stew that bubbled with blue steam, the …"
12"Nyx whispered that the chef was a former CEO who’d embezzled millions from his company, forcing his employees to take pay cuts until they quit, so he’d been sen…"
13"He was tall, with dark hair and a goatee, and he wore a ring on his finger that glowed bright crimson, matching the Heartstone in her palm."
14"Rory froze, her hand tightening around the Fae Blade, her breath catching in her throat."
36.76% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags17
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"she said, her voice quiet"
1"Nyx said, their shadowy hand resting lightly on her shoulder"
2"he said, his smile growing wider"
20.97% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags13
fancyCount4
fancyTags
0"they’d (would)"
1"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
2"they whispered (whisper)"
3"Nyx murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences31
tagDensity0.419
leniency0.839
rawRatio0.308
effectiveRatio0.258
74.0965%