Run: 2026-03-03-01KJTZT6N5B8YW8KMP5G78MMHP

Run Details

Duration:
6m 53s
Cost:
$0.005970
Provider:
Seed

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The rain slanted into Rory’s collar as she slung her damp Golden Empress delivery bag over her shoulder, her boots squelching on the rain-slicked paving stones of the old disused rail arch. It was half past midnight, the last delivery of a frigid November Friday, and her straight, shoulder-length black hair stuck to the back of her neck in sticky clumps. She fumbled for her flat keys, then remembered the silver chain tucked inside her jacket pocket— the Heartstone pendant, the thumb-sized crimson gem the anonymous benefactor had left on her doorstep three weeks prior. It pressed warm against her sternum, a steady, thrumming beat that only flared sharp when a Hel rift was within a mile. Her fingers brushed the wrapped moonsilver dagger next, the Fae blade Isolde had pressed into her hands a week before, warning her that she would need it sooner than she thought. She’d tucked it in the delivery bag’s inner pocket, wrapped in a greasy napkin from last night’s sesame chicken. A soft whisper curled around her ear, thin and wind-driven, and she smiled without turning around. “Took you long enough,” she said. The shadow detaching from the arch’s brick wall solidified into Nyx: six and a half feet of humanoid silhouette, their form shifting like smoke caught in a breeze, faint violet eyes glowing like embers against the amber dim of their solidified shape. Their voice was exactly as she remembered, a whisper carried on a gust of cool air that didn’t mix with the rain’s damp chill. “You called. Felt the rift too. Veil’s fraying worse than the seer warned—winter solstice is three days off, remember?” Rory nodded, rubbing the crescent scar on her left wrist without thinking, a nervous habit she’d had since she was seven and fell through a skatepark ramp. She followed the thread of Nyx’s shadow down the rail arch, past the rusted railings and broken glass, until she spotted it: a shimmering, heat-hazed distortion at the arch’s far end, too faint for anyone without supernatural sight to pick out, but bright as a neon sign to her and Nyx. The Heartstone pulsed faster, thrumming against her chest like a tiny bird’s heart. “Lead the way,” Nyx said, their form flickering at the edges as they drifted ahead. Rory took a deep breath, grabbed the Fae blade from her delivery bag, and stepped through the rift first. The rain vanished instantly. The smell of diesel and river mud was replaced by the warm, sweet tang of ripe starfruit and roasted honeyed nuts, so sharp it made her nose prickle. She stumbled onto soft, mossy ground, not rain-soaked stone, and blinked hard. Above her, the sky was a deep, warm amber, the sun a low, glowing disk that painted everything in honeyed gold and rust. There was no gray London sky, no distant traffic noise, just the soft rustle of leaves and the distant clink of glassware. Nyx solidified beside her, their shadowy form solid enough that she could see the faint outline of their slouching shoulders, the way their violet eyes glowed against the amber light. “Well,” they said, their voice a little thinner than usual, “this is Dymas. Prince Belphegor’s realm of excess. Isolde mentioned it once, when we talked about rifts.” Rory looked around, her eyes wide. Rows of vines strung with tiny glowing blue flowers stretched as far as the eye could see, their leaves a deep purple that shimmered like oil on water. Beneath them, the moss was dotted with wild, iridescent flowers, petals shifting from pink to green to gold as she watched. Her phone slipped out of her pocket as she bent to pluck one of the flowers, and it died instantly when it hit the ground—no signal, no battery life, just a black screen. She plucked a grape from the vine beside her, its skin smooth and cool to the touch, glinting like polished garnet. She popped it in her mouth, and her eyes widened: it tasted like honey and chili pepper, sweet and spicy, like nothing she’d ever tasted. Nyx plucked one too, holding it up to their glowing eyes before taking a bite. “That’s why the helbound souls are here,” they said, nodding towards a group of figures in white aprons moving between the vines, carrying wicker baskets overflowing with fruit. “They grow the ingredients for the feasts. Look at their hands.” Rory squinted, and her stomach twisted. The figures had pale, almost translucent skin, their eyes blank and unblinking, their fingers twisted at odd angles, like they’d been broken and reset a hundred times. They moved in perfect sync, their baskets clinking softly as they walked, not a sound out of place. None of them looked up at Rory and Nyx. “They don’t see us?” she asked, clutching the Fae blade tighter. It was cold against her palm, and it hums softly, a faint, high-pitched sound that only she could hear. “Not unless we draw attention to themselves,” Nyx corrected, drifting over to one of the baskets. They plucked a single cherry the size of a golf ball, its skin glowing with a soft red light. “Isolde always said that the people of Dymas don’t bother with strangers unless they steal too much food. A single cherry won’t matter.” They took a bite, and the cherry oozes clear, vanilla-scented sap down their shadowy fingers. Rory followed their lead, plucking a cherry and popping it in her mouth. It was even sweeter than the grape, with a hint of something minty that made her tongue tingle. She rubbed her crescent scar again, her nerves spiking—this was real, this was another realm, exactly what she’d been running from when she left Evan in Cardiff. She followed Nyx as they walked down the row of vines, past the helbound harvesters, until they rounded a bend and stumbled onto a grand stone courtyard. Long wooden tables stretched across the courtyard, heaped with platters of roasted meats glazed in amber sauce, piles of glowing green fruit, bowls of something that looked like liquid gold. A group of figures in fine silk robes sat at the tables, laughing softly, their voices melodic but empty, like they were repeating a script they’d heard a thousand times. The Heartstone pulsed brighter, thrumming against her chest as she stepped closer to the courtyard. A marble pillar stood at the far end, carved with swirling patterns that she couldn’t recognize, and a small plaque beneath it—when she leaned in, she could read the words, even though she’d never seen the language before: *Feast of the Gluttons, Dymas, Realm of Excess*. “See?” Nyx whispered, drifting over to the pillar. Their form melted into the shadow cast by the tablecloth, a wisp of shadow curling around the pillar’s base. “This is exactly what Isolde described. A place where you can eat all you want, but you’re never full—because the food is just a trap for the helbound souls.” Rory nodded, her eyes scanning the courtyard. One of the robed figures lifted a goblet of something glowing blue, and the clink of glass filled the air. A chef carrying a giant platter of pastries walked past her, their apron stained with amber sauce, their blank eyes staring straight ahead. She stepped back, tripping over a stone, and the chef’s head turned towards her. Her blood ran cold. The chef’s blank eyes focused directly on her, and they paused, their hand still holding the platter. Rory fumbled for the Fae blade, pulling it out of her delivery bag, its moonsilver surface glinting in the amber light. It hummed louder, a warning, and she held it out in front of her, ready to strike. Then, a soft voice spoke behind her, light as clover: “Put the blade down, little one. They are only confused by your heartbeat.” Rory turned, her hand still clutching the dagger, and her breath caught. Standing a few feet away was a woman with silver hair reaching her waist, her eyes pale lavender, her gown made of something that looked like woven moonlight. It was Isolde, the seer who’d given her the Fae blade, the woman who’d warned her that Hel rifts were opening up across London. She hadn’t worn shoes, and when she stepped forward, Rory noticed that she left no footprints on the mossy ground, just a faint shimmer in the air where she’d walked. “Isolde!” Rory said, letting out a shaky breath. She lowered the Fae blade, and the chef turned back to their platter, continuing on their way. “What are you doing here?” Isolde smiled, her lips curved in a gentle, knowing way. “I told you that you would need guidance when you followed the Heartstone’s pulse. I knew the rift would open here, three days before the solstice.” Her voice was soft, laced with the riddles that Rory had come to know. “The Veil frays at the solstice, yes, but it frays faster when a soul seeks to escape their own shadow.” Rory rubbed her crescent scar again, her cheeks heating up. She’d been running from Evan for three months, but she’d never thought that running would lead her to another realm. “I didn’t mean to bring Nyx with me,” she said, nodding towards the shadow that was still curled around the marble pillar. Nyx slipped out of the shadow, solidifying beside Isolde, their violet eyes glinting in the amber light. “She didn’t have a choice,” they said, their voice a little stronger now. “The rift pulled us both through.” Isolde nodded, her silver hair blowing in a soft wind that carried the scent of wild clover, not starfruit and honeyed nuts. The wind swept past a small fountain tucked between two trees nearby, its basin heaped with liquid gold that shimmered in the amber sky. Droplets of gold fell from the spout, catching the light like tiny scattered stars, and a soft, melodic music drifted from the water, like a lullaby Rory had forgotten she’d heard. “That’s the Fountain of Temptation,” Isolde said, nodding toward it. “It sings the songs of your deepest cravings. Don’t listen too long, little one. It will trap you if you do.” Rory pulled her hand back from the fountain’s edge, her cheeks flushing—she’d been craving a break from Evan, from her delivery shifts, from the weight of every mistake she’d ever made, and the fountain had known. “The rift doesn’t discriminate between those who seek it and those who stumble into it,” Isolde continued. “Now, you must be careful. Dymas feeds on excess, on the things you crave most. If you stay too long, it will trap you here, forcing you to indulge until your soul is empty.” Nyx flickered at the edges of their form, their shadowy hands clutching at their chest. “I can’t stay solid much longer,” they said, their voice thinner than before. “The mortal plane is the only place I can hold a solid form for long. If I stay here, I’ll fade back into the shadows, trapped between realms until someone pulls me out.” Rory’s stomach twisted. She’d grown used to Nyx being there, a soft whisper in her ear, a shadow that kept her company when she was alone in her flat above Silas’ bar. She couldn’t let them fade. “Let’s go,” she said, grabbing Nyx’s shadowy hand (or what passed for a hand) and starting toward the edge of the courtyard. Isolde fell in step beside her, her silver gown glowing against the amber light. As they walked, Rory noticed more details that she’d missed before: the trees in the nearby orchard had fruits that looked like giant eyes, their pupils following her as she passed; the torches lining the path burned with blue flame that didn’t produce smoke; the air was so warm it felt like she was wrapped in a blanket, even though the November air in London had been freezing. The Heartstone pulsed slower now, as they moved away from the feast hall, but it still thrummmed against her chest, a reminder that they were in Hel, a realm that was supposed to be full of pain and suffering, but instead was full of excess and temptation. They reached a small clearing at the orchard’s heart, and Rory spotted the rift: a shimmering distortion in the air, exactly like the one they’d stepped through earlier, but this one was smaller, fainter. The Heartstone pulsed bright, warm against her chest, and she knew that this was the portal back to London. Isolde placed a hand on her shoulder, her touch light as a feather. “The blade that cuts through shadows will keep the teeth of excess at bay,” she said, her voice soft with lidded meaning. “Keep it close, little one. The Veil will fray more as the solstice approaches, and more rifts will open. You will need it.” She pressed a small leather pouch into Rory’s hand, and when Rory opened it, she saw a handful of the glowing blue grapes from the vineyard. “These will keep you grounded, when the realm’s temptations get too strong.” Nyx flickered again, their form fading a little at the edges. “We have to go now,” they whispered. Rory nodded, squeezing Nyx’s hand. She stepped towards the rift first, then turned back to Isolde. “Thank you,” she said. Isolde smiled, her lavender eyes soft. “You will see me again, little one. When the veil is at its thinnest.” Then she vanished, leaving only a faint trail of silver moonlight in her place, not a single footprint left behind on the mossy ground. Rory stepped through the rift first, and the smell of rain and diesel hit her instantly, the gray London sky closing in around her. Nyx followed behind her, their shadowy form solidifying for a second before they faded into the shadow of a nearby lamppost. Rory pulled the pouch of grapes from her pocket, then looked down at her left wrist, rubbing the crescent scar one more time. She’d stepped into another realm, faced with helbound souls and the temptations of excess, and she’d made it out. But she knew that this wasn’t the last time she’d have to step through a rift. The Heartstone pulsed once, soft and warm against her chest, and she slipped it back into her jacket pocket, ready for whatever came next.
created_at"2026-03-03T23:16:29.49Z" 3/3/2026, 11:16:29 PM
model"bytedance-seed/seed-2.0-mini-20260224"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency421
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time413044
tokens_prompt1590
tokens_completion15897
native_tokens_prompt1692
native_tokens_completion14503
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning11337
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
usage0.0059704
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9265aa87-9657-4d40-b9d7-2a70318e57d9"
id"02177257978960185fbb282d67f6232524942e9d2086bad6840f3"
is_byokfalse
latency421
model_permaslug"bytedance-seed/seed-2.0-mini-20260224"
provider_name"Seed"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1772579789-gWSBnyQPAURWtGX6IrbP"
upstream_id"02177257978960185fbb282d67f6232524942e9d2086bad6840f3"
total_cost0.0059704
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Seed"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags22
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Then she vanished [Then]"
dialogueSentences32
tagDensity0.688
leniency1
rawRatio0.045
effectiveRatio0.045
93.73% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2394
totalAiIsmAdverbs3
found
0
adverb"softly"
count3
highlights
0"softly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
45.70% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2394
totalAiIsms26
found
0
word"whisper"
count3
1
word"chill"
count1
2
word"pulsed"
count5
3
word"shimmered"
count2
4
word"glinting"
count3
5
word"stomach"
count2
6
word"perfect"
count1
7
word"silk"
count1
8
word"marble"
count2
9
word"scanning"
count1
10
word"pulse"
count1
11
word"weight"
count1
12
word"flickered"
count2
13
word"reminder"
count1
highlights
0"whisper"
1"chill"
2"pulsed"
3"shimmered"
4"glinting"
5"stomach"
6"perfect"
7"silk"
8"marble"
9"scanning"
10"pulse"
11"weight"
12"flickered"
13"reminder"
66.67% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches2
maxInWindow2
found
0
label"blood ran cold"
count1
1
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count1
highlights
0"blood ran cold"
1"eyes widened"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences104
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences104
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences115
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen68
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans1
markdownWords8
totalWords2388
ratio0.003
matches
0"Feast of the Gluttons, Dymas, Realm of Excess"
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions24
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
66.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions84
wordCount1990
uniqueNames16
maxNameDensity1.21
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Rory24
Golden1
Empress1
November2
Friday1
Heartstone6
Hel3
Fae6
Isolde11
Nyx17
London5
Evan3
Cardiff1
Gluttons1
Dymas1
Realm1
persons
0"Rory"
1"Isolde"
2"Nyx"
3"Evan"
4"Realm"
places
0"Hel"
1"London"
2"Cardiff"
globalScore0.897
windowScore0.667
43.62% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences94
glossingSentenceCount4
matches
0"tasted like honey and chili pepper, sweet"
1"looked like liquid gold"
2"looked like woven moonlight"
3"looked like giant eyes, their pupils foll"
4"felt like she was wrapped in a blanket"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount2388
matches(empty)
50.72% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount4
totalSentences115
matches
0"noticed that she"
1"thought that running"
2"knew that this"
3"knew that this"
86.30% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs37
mean64.54
std29.18
cv0.452
sampleLengths
0117
172
285
391
415
519
689
757
888
9100
1060
1130
1258
1373
1487
1561
1656
1764
1859
1923
2094
2130
2270
2352
2436
25108
2687
2761
2873
29115
3053
3196
3218
3320
3444
35103
3624
88.39% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences104
matches
0"was replaced"
1"was dotted"
2"been broken"
3"was wrapped"
4"was supposed"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount2
totalVerbs327
matches
0"were repeating"
1"were opening"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount5
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences6
totalSentences115
ratio0.052
matches
0"She fumbled for her flat keys, then remembered the silver chain tucked inside her jacket pocket— the Heartstone pendant, the thumb-sized crimson gem the anonymous benefactor had left on her doorstep three weeks prior."
1"Her phone slipped out of her pocket as she bent to pluck one of the flowers, and it died instantly when it hit the ground—no signal, no battery life, just a black screen."
2"She rubbed her crescent scar again, her nerves spiking—this was real, this was another realm, exactly what she’d been running from when she left Evan in Cardiff."
3"A marble pillar stood at the far end, carved with swirling patterns that she couldn’t recognize, and a small plaque beneath it—when she leaned in, she could read the words, even though she’d never seen the language before: *Feast of the Gluttons, Dymas, Realm of Excess*."
4"Rory pulled her hand back from the fountain’s edge, her cheeks flushing—she’d been craving a break from Evan, from her delivery shifts, from the weight of every mistake she’d ever made, and the fountain had known."
5"As they walked, Rory noticed more details that she’d missed before: the trees in the nearby orchard had fruits that looked like giant eyes, their pupils following her as she passed; the torches lining the path burned with blue flame that didn’t produce smoke; the air was so warm it felt like she was wrapped in a blanket, even though the November air in London had been freezing."
88.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1618
adjectiveStacks2
stackExamples
0"faint, high-pitched sound"
1"clear, vanilla-scented sap"
adverbCount55
adverbRatio0.033992583436341164
lyAdverbCount10
lyAdverbRatio0.006180469715698393
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences115
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences115
mean20.77
std11.18
cv0.538
sampleLengths
032
129
234
322
431
519
616
76
842
924
1019
1127
1251
1313
1415
1519
164
1728
1812
1923
2022
2130
2227
236
2428
2521
2633
2721
2825
2915
3028
3111
326
3327
3418
359
3611
3719
3816
3919
4023
4115
4213
4318
4427
4527
4630
4730
4815
4946
51.59% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats4
diversityRatio0.33043478260869563
totalSentences115
uniqueOpeners38
66.67% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount2
totalSentences100
matches
0"Then, a soft voice spoke"
1"Then she vanished, leaving only"
ratio0.02
56.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount41
totalSentences100
matches
0"It was half past midnight,"
1"She fumbled for her flat"
2"It pressed warm against her"
3"Her fingers brushed the wrapped"
4"She’d tucked it in the"
5"Their voice was exactly as"
6"She followed the thread of"
7"She stumbled onto soft, mossy"
8"they said, their voice a"
9"Her phone slipped out of"
10"She plucked a grape from"
11"She popped it in her"
12"they said, nodding towards a"
13"They moved in perfect sync,"
14"she asked, clutching the Fae"
15"It was cold against her"
16"They plucked a single cherry"
17"They took a bite, and"
18"It was even sweeter than"
19"She rubbed her crescent scar"
ratio0.41
10.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount90
totalSentences100
matches
0"The rain slanted into Rory’s"
1"It was half past midnight,"
2"She fumbled for her flat"
3"It pressed warm against her"
4"Her fingers brushed the wrapped"
5"She’d tucked it in the"
6"A soft whisper curled around"
7"The shadow detaching from the"
8"Their voice was exactly as"
9"Rory nodded, rubbing the crescent"
10"She followed the thread of"
11"The Heartstone pulsed faster, thrumming"
12"Nyx said, their form flickering"
13"Rory took a deep breath,"
14"The rain vanished instantly."
15"The smell of diesel and"
16"She stumbled onto soft, mossy"
17"Nyx solidified beside her, their"
18"they said, their voice a"
19"Rory looked around, her eyes"
ratio0.9
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences100
matches(empty)
ratio0
13.89% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences72
technicalSentenceCount13
matches
0"The rain slanted into Rory’s collar as she slung her damp Golden Empress delivery bag over her shoulder, her boots squelching on the rain-slicked paving stones …"
1"The shadow detaching from the arch’s brick wall solidified into Nyx: six and a half feet of humanoid silhouette, their form shifting like smoke caught in a bree…"
2"Rory followed their lead, plucking a cherry and popping it in her mouth."
3"It was even sweeter than the grape, with a hint of something minty that made her tongue tingle."
4"She rubbed her crescent scar again, her nerves spiking—this was real, this was another realm, exactly what she’d been running from when she left Evan in Cardiff…"
5"Long wooden tables stretched across the courtyard, heaped with platters of roasted meats glazed in amber sauce, piles of glowing green fruit, bowls of something…"
6"Standing a few feet away was a woman with silver hair reaching her waist, her eyes pale lavender, her gown made of something that looked like woven moonlight."
7"It was Isolde, the seer who’d given her the Fae blade, the woman who’d warned her that Hel rifts were opening up across London."
8"Isolde nodded, her silver hair blowing in a soft wind that carried the scent of wild clover, not starfruit and honeyed nuts."
9"The wind swept past a small fountain tucked between two trees nearby, its basin heaped with liquid gold that shimmered in the amber sky."
10"Rory pulled her hand back from the fountain’s edge, her cheeks flushing—she’d been craving a break from Evan, from her delivery shifts, from the weight of every…"
11"As they walked, Rory noticed more details that she’d missed before: the trees in the nearby orchard had fruits that looked like giant eyes, their pupils followi…"
12"The Heartstone pulsed slower now, as they moved away from the feast hall, but it still thrummmed against her chest, a reminder that they were in Hel, a realm th…"
11.36% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags22
uselessAdditionCount5
matches
0"Nyx said, their form flickering at the edges as they drifted ahead"
1"they said, their voice a little thinner than usual,"
2"they said, their voice a little stronger now"
3"they said, their voice thinner than before"
4"she said, her voice soft with lidded meaning"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags19
fancyCount6
fancyTags
0"Nyx corrected (correct)"
1"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
2"a soft voice spoke (speak)"
3"Isolde continued (continue)"
4"She pressed (press)"
5"they whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences32
tagDensity0.594
leniency1
rawRatio0.316
effectiveRatio0.316
67.9772%