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Run: 2026-03-06-01KK1HFM0S2XVVRFWXCJ41SSKA
Run Details
Model:
Inception Mercury 2
Test:
Bad Writing Habits
Scenario:
Fantasy: entering an ancient ruin
Duration:
6.7s
Cost:
$0.003823
Provider:
Inception
Evaluation summary
Score
Evaluator
Details Link
100.00%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
(details)
94.40%
AI-ism adverb frequency
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism character names
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism location names
(details)
0.00%
AI-ism word frequency
(details)
66.67%
Cliché density
(details)
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
(details)
73.17%
Filter word density
(details)
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
(details)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
(details)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
(details)
87.07%
Name drop frequency
(details)
32.08%
Narrator intent-glossing
(details)
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
(details)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
(details)
96.65%
Paragraph length variance
(details)
99.56%
Passive voice overuse
(details)
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
(details)
79.37%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
(details)
94.00%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
(details)
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
(details)
97.33%
Sentence length variance
(details)
37.41%
Sentence opener variety
(details)
0.00%
Adverb-first sentence starts
(details)
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
(details)
0.00%
Subject-first sentence starts
(details)
0.00%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
(details)
82.62%
Technical jargon density
(details)
0.00%
Useless dialogue additions
(details)
0.00%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
(details)
71.3434%
Overall
Model input
System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Fantasy genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>
Model response
Messages
Meta
AI
Rory's boots slipped on the
moss, and a low hum rose from the earth.
She crouched, fingers brushing a
smooth stone that thrummed like a
pulse
beneath her palm.
The Heartstone Pendant, a small
ancient circular deep crimson Dymas silver pendant,
throbbed
against her throat, its faint inner glow flickering in rhythm with the hum. “Hold still,”
she whispered, eyes narrowed
. “The veil thins here.”
A ripple of violet light
coiled around the base of a twisted oak, and Nyx stepped from the shadow, their silhouette flickering between solid and mist.
The Shade's violet eyes glowed
faintly, a
whisper
of wind carrying their words. “The night breathes,”
Nyx murmured, voice a sigh
on the wind. “Listen for the
echo
of hunger.” Isolde emerged from the underbrush, her silver hair spilling like moonlight over the grass.
She moved without disturbing a
single blade, her lavender eyes reflecting an ancient fire. “The path that bends never ends,”
she said, each word a
riddle. “Yet the end begins where the feast is served.” Rory glanced at the pendant, then at the ancient standing stones that marked the grove’s boundary.
Their surfaces pulsed with a
faint amber sheen, as if the stones themselves remembered a distant fire.
She slipped the Fae‑forged blade
from her belt—a sleek slender leaf‑shaped cold moonsilver weapon blade—its edge humming with a quiet power.
The trio moved deeper, the
forest giving way to a cavernous hollow cut into the earth.
The air grew warm, scented
with fermented fruit and a metallic tang that clung to the throat. Strange vines draped the walls, their leaves shimmering with iridescent specks that
pulsed
in time with the pendant’s beat.
Rory stepped forward, the blade
humming as it brushed a glyph
etched
into the stone.
The glyph flared, a burst
of silvery light that scattered the vines like smoke. “Cut the ward,”
she said, voice steady
.
The blade sliced cleanly, the
glyph shattering into a spray of pale dust that settled like snow.
A low growl resonated from
the
depths
, a
sound that seemed to vibrate the very ground
. Nyx's shape
wavered
, their form becoming more translucent. “The hunger awakens,”
they said, eyes narrowing
. “It feeds on
desire
.” Isolde lifted a hand, palm open, and the vines recoiled, their tendrils curling back into the stone. “A feast is promised,” she whispered, “but the price is
measured
in breath.” Rory pressed the pendant against the stone wall. The crimson gem glowed brighter, a soft heat radiating outward. A seam split the stone, revealing a narrow passage lined with blackened glass that reflected a sky of amber. “Beyond this,” Rory muttered, “lies the mouth of Dymas.” The trio slipped into the passage, the air growing thick with the scent of roasted meat and sweet fermented wine. The walls
pulsed
with a rhythm like a heart, each beat
echoing
the pendant’s thrum. At the passage’s end, a vast chamber opened, its ceiling vaulted with arches of bone‑white
marble
. In the centre stood a massive stone table, laden with platters of exotic foods that glimmered with an
otherworldly
sheen. The dishes
seemed to
move of their own accord, steam rising in spirals that formed
fleeting
faces.
Rory stepped forward, the blade
at her side, and the pendant’s glow intensified, casting a scarlet light across the table. “Who prepares this feast?”
she asked, voice low
. A figure emerged from the shadows, its form shifting between flesh and flame. Prince Belphegor, ruler of Dymas, hovered above the table, his eyes twin pits of amber fire. “Welcome, mortal,”
he crooned, voice resonant with
a thousand sighs. “You have tasted the perfume of gluttony.” Nyx's silhouette
flickered
, their voice a
whisper
that cut through the clamor. “The veil cracks, and the feast devours.” Isolde stepped forward, her lavender gaze fixed on the prince. “The path that bends never ends,”
she repeated, her words a
chant that seemed to tug at the very fabric of the chamber
. Belphegor laughed, a sound that rattled the
marble
. “You think you can outwit a king of excess?” Rory lifted the blade, its cold edge
gleaming
. “I cut what you cannot swallow.” The blade sang as it sliced a strand of light that bound the prince to the table. The light snapped, and the prince recoiled, his form flickering. “Your gift is a blade of moon‑kissed steel,” he hissed. “But the hunger is deeper than steel.” A sudden roar erupted from the far wall, a sound that rattled the bones of the chamber. The stone cracked, and a vortex of amber light swirled, a portal to the realm of Hel. The veil thinned, its shimmering distortion rippling like water. Nyx’s form dissolved into pure shadow, their voice
echoing
from every corner. “The veil weakens at the solstice. Winter seals, summer tears.” Isolde raised a hand, and the vines that clung to the walls recoiled, revealing a hidden alcove. Inside lay a chest of dark wood, its surface
etched
with runes that
pulsed
in rhythm with the pendant. Rory approached, the pendant’s heat
searing
her skin.
She opened the chest, and
a cascade of silver dust rose, forming a shape that hovered—an ancient key, its teeth jagged like a broken fang. “The key to the gate,”
she said, eyes flashing
. Belphegor’s
eyes narrowed
. “You will not leave with it.” The vortex surged, pulling at the trio, the air crackling with the scent of burnt sugar and iron. The ground
trembled
, and a chorus of distant voices rose, a choir of the damned singing a hymn of endless hunger. Rory gripped the blade, the pendant pulsing against her throat. “We take the key,”
she declared, voice firm
.
She thrust the blade into
the stone arch framing the portal. The blade sang, a note that cut through the hum of the portal, and the arch
shattered
into shards that fell like rain. The vortex roared, a
maw
of amber flame that threatened to swallow them whole. Nyx’s shadow coalesced around Rory, their form a protective veil. “Shadows bind,” Nyx whispered, “but light must break.” Isolde stepped forward, her hand hovering over the key.
She placed it upon the
pedestal, and the runes glowed, a soft lavender light that spread across the chamber. “The feast ends where the hunger begins,”
she intoned, voice a ripple
of wind. A sudden, blinding flash erupted from the portal, and the stone walls
trembled
. The amber light surged, forming a vortex of fire and ice that spiralled toward the trio. Rory felt the heat of the portal lick her skin, the pendant’s glow flaring into a
searing
crimson. The blade
vibrated
, its cold edge humming against the heat. “Now!”
she shouted, and swung the
blade in a wide arc. The blade sliced through the vortex, a spray of moon‑silver light cutting the amber tide. The vortex recoiled, a scream of wind and flame
echoing
through the chamber. The portal shuddered, its edges fraying like old parchment. Belphegor staggered, his form cracking. “You cannot—”
he began, but his voice
was swallowed
by a sudden, deafening crack. The chamber collapsed around them, stone falling in a rain of dust. The pendant’s
pulse
steadied, its glow dimming to a soft ember. Rory scrambled to her feet, the blade clutched in her hand, the key warm against her palm. Nyx’s shadow clung to her shoulder, a
whisper
of wind. “Where do we go?”
Isolde asked, eyes reflecting the faint light of the dying portal
. A low rumble rose from the floor, a guttural
growl that seemed to come from the earth itself
. The ground split, a fissure widening into a black
maw
that swallowed the remnants of the feast. Rory stared into the darkness, the pendant’s glow now a steady thrum against her throat. “We go through,”
she said, voice low
. The fissure widened, revealing a stairwell of obsidian stone that descended into an abyss of swirling shadows. The air smelled of rot and sweet perfume, a paradox that made her
stomach
churn
. Nyx’s form
flickered
, their voice a breath. “The veil watches. The hunger waits.” Isolde lifted the key, its silver teeth catching the faint light. “The path that bends never ends,”
she repeated, a smile ghosting her lips
. The trio stepped onto the obsidian stairs, the stone cool beneath their feet. The stairwell spiralled downward, each step
echoing
with the distant clang of a distant feast. Rory felt the pendant’s heat surge, a
warning that the
veil thinned further with each step. The blade sang in her hand, a low
hum that seemed to sync with the heartbeat of the abyss
. A sudden, sharp crack
echoed
behind them. The stone above
shattered
, and a torrent of amber fire rained down, illuminating the darkness with a ferocious glow. Rory turned, eyes wide. The fissure had opened wider, a
maw
of flame licking the stairwell, and from its
depths
rose a figure cloaked in shadows, its eyes twin pits of violet fire. “Nightwhisper,”
Nyx hissed, voice trembling
. The figure reached out, a hand of darkness stretching toward the pendant. Rory clenched the blade, the silver edge reflecting the flickering fire. The key glowed brighter, casting a pale
light that seemed to push back the shadows
. The figure’s mouth opened, a scream that was both a roar and a
whisper
. “Your feast is endless,” it snarled. The stairwell
trembled
, the stone cracking. Rory felt
the weight of the moment
, the pendant’s
pulse
matching the rhythm of the abyss. “Hold the line,” she whispered, and swung the blade in a wide arc, the moon‑silver cutting through the darkness. The blade sang, a note that rang through the abyss, shattering the figure’s form into shards of night. The amber fire flared, then collapsed into a swirl of black smoke that rose like a vortex. The stairwell fell silent, the only sound the faint thrum of the pendant against Rory’s throat. She stared down the darkness, the key warm in her palm, the blade still humming. A low, guttural chuckle
echoed
from the abyss, a promise that the hunger had not
been sated
. “We are not yet done,”
Nyx whispered, their voice a breath on the wind
. Isolde lifted her gaze, eyes reflecting the faint glow of the key. “The feast will rise again,” she said, voice a riddle. Rory tightened her grip on the blade, the pendant’s glow steady. The darkness below shifted, a shape forming from the smoke—a towering silhouette of a beast, its
maw
open, teeth
glinting
like shards of moonlight. The beast lunged, a roar that shook the stone. Rory braced, the blade poised, the pendant’s heat burning against her skin. The chapter ended as the beast’s claws scraped the stairwell, a scream of metal and fire filling the air.
created_at
"2026-03-06T12:20:43.691Z"
3/6/2026, 12:20:43 PM
model
"inception/mercury-2-20260304"
app_id
182717
external_user
(null)
streamed
true
cancelled
false
latency
2299
moderation_latency
(null)
generation_time
6633
tokens_prompt
5338
tokens_completion
4111
native_tokens_prompt
4808
native_tokens_completion
3496
native_tokens_completion_images
(null)
native_tokens_reasoning
1061
native_tokens_cached
5
num_media_prompt
(null)
num_input_audio_prompt
(null)
num_media_completion
0
num_search_results
(null)
origin
"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byok
false
finish_reason
"stop"
native_finish_reason
"stop"
usage
0.003822875
router
(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id
"c2a24e34-c306-4b4d-9e2f-b162c2d8bf0e"
id
"chatcmpl-be2177f4-cd0a-4f65-baed-bcb9e0ef19f7"
is_byok
false
latency
106
model_permaslug
"inception/mercury-2-20260304"
provider_name
"Inception"
status
200
user_agent
"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer
(null)
api_type
"completions"
id
"gen-1772799643-GNJonwMO5EFmLqTXQoB8"
upstream_id
"chatcmpl-be2177f4-cd0a-4f65-baed-bcb9e0ef19f7"
total_cost
0.003822875
cache_discount
0.000001125
upstream_inference_cost
0
provider_name
"Inception"
Evaluation details
Result
Evaluator
Details
Meta Data
100.00%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags
25
adverbTagCount
0
adverbTags
(empty)
dialogueSentences
37
tagDensity
0.676
leniency
1
rawRatio
0
effectiveRatio
0
94.40%
AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount
1785
totalAiIsmAdverbs
2
found
0
adverb
"very"
count
2
highlights
0
"very"
100.00%
AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
100.00%
AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
0.00%
AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount
1785
totalAiIsms
50
found
0
word
"pulse"
count
3
1
word
"throbbed"
count
1
2
word
"whisper"
count
4
3
word
"echo"
count
1
4
word
"pulsed"
count
4
5
word
"etched"
count
2
6
word
"resonated"
count
1
7
word
"depths"
count
2
8
word
"wavered"
count
1
9
word
"desire"
count
1
10
word
"measured"
count
1
11
word
"echoing"
count
4
12
word
"marble"
count
2
13
word
"otherworldly"
count
1
14
word
"fleeting"
count
1
15
word
"flickered"
count
2
16
word
"gleaming"
count
1
17
word
"searing"
count
2
18
word
"trembled"
count
3
19
word
"shattered"
count
2
20
word
"maw"
count
4
21
word
"vibrated"
count
1
22
word
"stomach"
count
1
23
word
"churn"
count
1
24
word
"echoed"
count
2
25
word
"weight"
count
1
26
word
"glinting"
count
1
highlights
0
"pulse"
1
"throbbed"
2
"whisper"
3
"echo"
4
"pulsed"
5
"etched"
6
"resonated"
7
"depths"
8
"wavered"
9
"desire"
10
"measured"
11
"echoing"
12
"marble"
13
"otherworldly"
14
"fleeting"
15
"flickered"
16
"gleaming"
17
"searing"
18
"trembled"
19
"shattered"
20
"maw"
21
"vibrated"
22
"stomach"
23
"churn"
24
"echoed"
25
"weight"
26
"glinting"
66.67%
Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches
3
maxInWindow
2
found
0
label
"eyes widened/narrowed"
count
2
1
label
"weight of words/silence"
count
1
highlights
0
"eyes narrowed"
1
"the weight of the moment"
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells
0
narrationSentences
123
matches
(empty)
73.17%
Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount
0
hedgeCount
6
narrationSentences
123
filterMatches
(empty)
hedgeMatches
0
"seemed to"
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences
135
gibberishSentences
0
adjustedGibberishSentences
0
longSentenceCount
0
runOnParagraphCount
0
giantParagraphCount
0
wordSaladCount
0
repetitionLoopCount
0
controlTokenCount
0
maxSentenceWordsSeen
29
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans
0
markdownWords
0
totalWords
1781
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions
23
unquotedAttributions
0
matches
(empty)
87.07%
Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions
49
wordCount
1589
uniqueNames
9
maxNameDensity
1.26
worstName
"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity
2
worstWindowName
"Rory"
discoveredNames
Heartstone
1
Pendant
1
Dymas
2
Nyx
11
Shade
1
Isolde
8
Rory
20
Belphegor
4
Hel
1
persons
0
"Dymas"
1
"Nyx"
2
"Shade"
3
"Isolde"
4
"Rory"
5
"Belphegor"
places
(empty)
globalScore
0.871
windowScore
1
32.08%
Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences
106
glossingSentenceCount
5
matches
0
"sound that seemed to vibrate the very ground"
1
"chant that seemed to tug at the very fabric of the chamber"
2
"growl that seemed to come from the earth itself"
3
"hum that seemed to sync with the heartbeat of the abyss"
4
"light that seemed to push back the shadows"
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches
0
per1kWords
0
wordCount
1781
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount
1
totalSentences
135
matches
0
"warning that the"
96.65%
Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs
78
mean
22.83
std
11.15
cv
0.488
sampleLengths
0
14
1
41
2
10
3
39
4
17
5
28
6
21
7
54
8
52
9
29
10
7
11
33
12
19
13
30
14
37
15
9
16
35
17
53
18
20
19
8
20
29
21
17
22
19
23
33
24
17
25
14
26
27
27
17
28
43
29
22
30
36
31
33
32
9
33
9
34
39
35
18
36
34
37
24
38
8
39
28
40
14
41
29
42
28
43
26
44
22
45
19
46
23
47
27
48
15
49
35
99.56%
Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount
2
totalSentences
123
matches
0
"was swallowed"
1
"been sated"
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount
0
totalVerbs
268
matches
(empty)
79.37%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount
4
semicolonCount
0
flaggedSentences
3
totalSentences
135
ratio
0.022
matches
0
"She slipped the Fae‑forged blade from her belt—a sleek slender leaf‑shaped cold moonsilver weapon blade—its edge humming with a quiet power."
1
"She opened the chest, and a cascade of silver dust rose, forming a shape that hovered—an ancient key, its teeth jagged like a broken fang."
2
"The darkness below shifted, a shape forming from the smoke—a towering silhouette of a beast, its maw open, teeth glinting like shards of moonlight."
94.00%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount
1593
adjectiveStacks
1
stackExamples
0
"small ancient circular deep crimson"
adverbCount
22
adverbRatio
0.013810420590081607
lyAdverbCount
4
lyAdverbRatio
0.0025109855618330196
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences
135
echoCount
0
echoWords
(empty)
97.33%
Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences
135
mean
13.19
std
5.19
cv
0.393
sampleLengths
0
14
1
15
2
26
3
6
4
4
5
26
6
13
7
11
8
6
9
14
10
14
11
12
12
9
13
16
14
17
15
21
16
16
17
17
18
19
19
15
20
14
21
7
22
17
23
16
24
8
25
7
26
4
27
17
28
13
29
8
30
10
31
19
32
9
33
20
34
15
35
16
36
20
37
17
38
20
39
8
40
13
41
16
42
10
43
7
44
12
45
7
46
10
47
23
48
8
49
9
37.41%
Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats
17
diversityRatio
0.2222222222222222
totalSentences
135
uniqueOpeners
30
0.00%
Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount
0
totalSentences
118
matches
(empty)
ratio
0
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount
24
totalSentences
118
matches
0
"She crouched, fingers brushing a"
1
"she whispered, eyes narrowed"
2
"She moved without disturbing a"
3
"she said, each word a"
4
"Their surfaces pulsed with a"
5
"She slipped the Fae‑forged blade"
6
"she said, voice steady"
7
"they said, eyes narrowing"
8
"she asked, voice low"
9
"he crooned, voice resonant with"
10
"she repeated, her words a"
11
"She opened the chest, and"
12
"she said, eyes flashing"
13
"she declared, voice firm"
14
"She thrust the blade into"
15
"She placed it upon the"
16
"she intoned, voice a ripple"
17
"she shouted, and swung the"
18
"he began, but his voice"
19
"she said, voice low"
ratio
0.203
0.00%
Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount
114
totalSentences
118
matches
0
"Rory's boots slipped on the"
1
"She crouched, fingers brushing a"
2
"The Heartstone Pendant, a small"
3
"she whispered, eyes narrowed"
4
"A ripple of violet light"
5
"The Shade's violet eyes glowed"
6
"Nyx murmured, voice a sigh"
7
"Isolde emerged from the underbrush,"
8
"She moved without disturbing a"
9
"she said, each word a"
10
"Rory glanced at the pendant,"
11
"Their surfaces pulsed with a"
12
"She slipped the Fae‑forged blade"
13
"The trio moved deeper, the"
14
"The air grew warm, scented"
15
"Rory stepped forward, the blade"
16
"The glyph flared, a burst"
17
"she said, voice steady"
18
"The blade sliced cleanly, the"
19
"A low growl resonated from"
ratio
0.966
0.00%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount
0
totalSentences
118
matches
(empty)
ratio
0
82.62%
Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences
83
technicalSentenceCount
7
matches
0
"Their surfaces pulsed with a faint amber sheen, as if the stones themselves remembered a distant fire."
1
"The glyph flared, a burst of silvery light that scattered the vines like smoke."
2
"A seam split the stone, revealing a narrow passage lined with blackened glass that reflected a sky of amber."
3
"In the centre stood a massive stone table, laden with platters of exotic foods that glimmered with an otherworldly sheen."
4
"She opened the chest, and a cascade of silver dust rose, forming a shape that hovered—an ancient key, its teeth jagged like a broken fang."
5
"The fissure widened, revealing a stairwell of obsidian stone that descended into an abyss of swirling shadows."
6
"The air smelled of rot and sweet perfume, a paradox that made her stomach churn."
0.00%
Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags
25
uselessAdditionCount
14
matches
0
"she whispered, eyes narrowed"
1
"she said, each word a riddle"
2
"she said, voice steady"
3
"they said, eyes narrowing"
4
"she asked, voice low"
5
"he crooned, voice resonant with a thousand sighs"
6
"she said, eyes flashing"
7
"she declared, voice firm"
8
"he began, but his voice was swallowed by a sudden, deafening crack"
9
"Isolde asked, eyes reflecting the faint light of the dying portal"
10
"she said, voice low"
11
"she repeated, a smile ghosting her lips"
12
"Nyx hissed, voice trembling"
13
"Nyx whispered, their voice a breath on the wind"
0.00%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags
22
fancyCount
14
fancyTags
0
"she whispered (whisper)"
1
"Nyx murmured (murmur)"
2
"she whispered (whisper)"
3
"Rory muttered (mutter)"
4
"she repeated (repeat)"
5
"he hissed (hiss)"
6
"she declared (declare)"
7
"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
8
"she shouted (shout)"
9
"she repeated (repeat)"
10
"Nyx hissed (hiss)"
11
"it snarled (snarl)"
12
"she whispered (whisper)"
13
"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences
37
tagDensity
0.595
leniency
1
rawRatio
0.636
effectiveRatio
0.636
71.3434%