Run: 2026-03-12-01KKHZBCHRVZ4AP25CBVF87EDX

Run Details

Duration:
29.8s
Cost:
$0.032325
Provider:
xAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Detective Harlow Quinn descended the rusted service staircase, her boots ringing against the metal treads with military precision. The air thickened as she dropped below street level, carrying the damp rot of forgotten concrete and a sharper, acrid note she could not name. Camden’s abandoned Tube station had been sealed for thirty years, yet someone had pried the grilles apart recently enough for the cut edges to still gleam. A bone token—small, ivory, etched with a single rune—lay discarded on the bottom step. She pocketed it without comment. Floodlights stuttered on the platform ahead, their white glare carving deep shadows between the old curved tiles. Uniformed officers moved like slow ghosts, but the scene already felt wrong. Too still. Too arranged. Sergeant Ellis straightened from beside the body as she approached, wiping his hands on his trousers. “Detective Quinn. Thought you’d want first look before the pathologist muscles in.” Quinn gave a curt nod. Her brown eyes swept the platform in a single practiced arc: no drag marks, no scattered litter, no signs of panic. The victim lay supine near the yellow safety line, arms folded neatly across his chest as if arranged for a wake. Male, mid-forties, dressed in a long coat of peculiar cut—too many pockets, too much velvet. A faint smell of ozone clung to him. “Looks like a vagrant fight,” Ellis offered, voice pitched low. “Multiple stab wounds, wallet missing. Probably surprised him while he was squatting down here. Camden’s full of weirdos.” Quinn crouched beside the corpse. The coat fell open to reveal three precise punctures through the sternum, yet the fabric around each hole was singed black. No blood pooled beneath the body. Not a drop on the tiles. She pressed two fingers against the victim’s jaw; the skin was cold, but the rigor had not yet locked the limbs. Time of death did not match the temperature of the wounds. “These burns are cauterized from the inside,” she said quietly. Ellis shifted his weight. “Could be some new designer drug. They’re cooking all sorts of rubbish these days.” Quinn did not answer. Her gaze tracked outward in widening circles. The platform showed no footprints in the fine dust except those of the responding officers and her own. The victim’s shoes—expensive, strange glyphs tooled into the leather—were clean. Whoever he was, he had not walked here through ordinary filth. A movement at the edge of the floodlight caught her attention. A woman stood half-hidden beside a broken vending machine, curly red hair escaping a hasty clip. Round glasses reflected the harsh lamps. Eva Kowalski. She clutched the strap of a worn leather satchel bulging with books, one hand rising unconsciously to tuck a strand behind her left ear. Her freckled face looked paler than usual. Quinn rose slowly. “Ms. Kowalski. Strange place to find a research assistant from the British Museum.” Eva’s green eyes darted to the body, then back to Quinn. “I was working late on some restricted manuscripts. Cross-referencing sigils from the Ptolemaic period. There’s a service entrance two streets over that connects to these tunnels. I heard… I thought I heard someone screaming. When I came down, he was already like this.” Ellis snorted softly. “Bit convenient, don’t you think, Detective? Occult expert just happens to stumble onto a murder in a sealed station.” Quinn lifted a hand to silence him. She studied Eva for a long moment. The younger woman’s pulse fluttered visibly at her throat, but her gaze kept returning to the victim’s coat with something like recognition. Quinn filed the observation away. “Walk with me,” she told Eva, then jerked her chin at Ellis. “Secure the perimeter. No one else down here until I say.” She led Eva twenty paces down the platform, far enough that their voices would not carry clearly over the hum of the generators. The salt-and-pepper stubble of her closely cropped hair caught the light as she tilted her head to examine the wall tiles. Protective marks had been scratched there—fresh, by the whiteness of the grooves. They matched nothing in any standard gang database. “Tell me what you really see,” Quinn said, keeping her tone neutral. “And don’t waste my time with museum stories.” Eva hesitated, then tucked her hair again. “The wounds. They weren’t made with a blade. At least not a physical one. The edges are too clean, and the flesh is fused. I’ve read accounts of shadow needles—artifacts used in certain… transactions. But you won’t want to hear that.” “You’re right. I don’t.” Quinn’s jaw tightened, the sharp line catching the light. Three years ago DS Morris had died with similar burns on his chest. The official report called it chemical exposure. She had never believed it. She turned back toward the body. Something glinted beneath the victim’s folded hand. Quinn knelt again and eased the fingers aside. A small brass compass rested in the man’s palm, its casing clouded with verdigris. Protective sigils marched in a perfect circle around the face. The needle spun lazily, not north, but toward the far tunnel mouth where the tracks disappeared into darkness. Ellis wandered over. “Junk. Flea market rubbish. Doesn’t mean anything.” Quinn weighed the compass in her palm. It was warm, far warmer than the corpse. The needle steadied, pointing insistently into the unlit tunnel. She rose and followed its direction, boots crunching on loose gravel. Eva trailed a step behind, satchel bumping against her hip. The floodlights faded behind them. Quinn clicked on her torch. The beam revealed more symbols on the tunnel wall—identical to those on the compass face and to the ones carved beside the body. Her pulse kicked up a notch, but she kept her breathing even. Military precision, she reminded herself. Observe. Deduce. Do not leap. “These aren’t random,” she muttered. Eva’s voice came soft in the dark. “They’re containment marks. Used to hold something in place while a transaction occurs. The Veil Market used to set up here, before the full moon shift. Enchanted goods, banned substances, information you can’t buy anywhere else. Requires a bone token for entry.” Quinn’s fingers closed around the one in her pocket. She did not ask how Eva knew that. She swept the torch along the tracks. No blood. No scuff marks. Yet the victim had clearly been positioned after death; the neat arrangement of his arms suggested ritual, not robbery. Ellis’s theory collapsed further with every step. If this had been a mugging, the killer would have fled, not lingered to fold the dead man’s hands like a corpse on a catafalque. The compass needle twitched violently as they reached a junction where an old maintenance door hung askew. Quinn pushed it open. The hinges screamed. Inside, the small room smelled of incense and ozone. Shelves had been ripped from the walls, but one object remained untouched: a slender glass vial containing a single drop of quicksilver that moved against gravity, crawling up the side rather than pooling at the bottom. She stared at it. Evidence that refused to behave like evidence. Behind her, Eva drew a sharp breath. “That’s a memory anchor. Extremely illegal. Whoever killed him didn’t want the victim’s final moments recorded.” Quinn turned slowly, studying the younger woman’s face in the torchlight. Eva’s nervous habit had returned; she kept tucking the same curl behind her ear though it refused to stay. The satchel strap twisted between her fingers. Fear, yes, but also something like grief. “You knew him,” Quinn said. “Not personally. But I’ve seen him at the Museum archives. He traded information. Dangerous information. About rifts. About what happened to certain police officers three years ago.” The words landed like a slap. Morris’s name hung unspoken between them. Quinn’s leather watch suddenly felt tight against her wrist. She forced her mind back to the physical facts. “The lack of blood means the wounds were made post-mortem,” she said, thinking aloud. “Or the blood was removed by other means. The burns suggest intense localized heat without flame. The compass points toward residual energy we can’t see. And these symbols—” She traced one on the door frame with her fingertip. “They’re the same ones I saw in the photos from Morris’s case file. Photos that were supposed to have been sealed.” Ellis’s voice echoed from the platform, calling for her. Quinn ignored him. She crouched and examined the floor of the small room. A single perfect circle had been scorched into the concrete, its circumference unbroken except for one gap no wider than two fingers. In the gap lay another bone token, this one cracked down the middle. “Entry and exit,” Quinn murmured. “Two tokens. Two people. One left, one didn’t.” Eva stepped closer, voice dropping to a whisper. “Detective, whatever you think my friends and I are involved in, this is bigger. Something came through here. Not a person. The evidence doesn’t add up because the rules aren’t the ones you’re used to.” Quinn straightened. The brass compass in her hand vibrated faintly, its needle now pointing directly at Eva’s satchel. She reached out before the younger woman could react and flipped the satchel open. Inside, among the books, rested a small leather journal. Quinn pulled it free. The cover bore the same sigil as the compass. Eva’s face lost another shade of color. “That’s not what you think.” Quinn flipped it open. The pages contained meticulous drawings of the crime scene—drawn before the police had arrived. Timestamps in the margin proved it. Yet the handwriting was not Eva’s. “You found the body first,” Quinn said. “You drew this. Then you called it in and pretended to discover it later. Why?” “Because I needed you to see it for yourself. The patterns. The way it mirrors what happened to your partner.” Eva’s voice cracked. “I’m not your enemy, Detective Quinn. But the people running the Veil Market—they’re covering something up. Something that killed Morris and is still killing.” Quinn closed the journal with deliberate care. The evidence still refused to line up neatly. No murder weapon. No footprints. No blood. Yet every anomaly pointed toward the same impossible conclusion: this station had hosted something beyond normal crime. And Eva, with her occult research and her convenient presence, sat at the center of the web. She looked at the compass again. The needle had stopped spinning. It pointed steadily now toward a crack in the far wall, a fissure no wider than a hair that nevertheless leaked a faint violet light. Quinn holstered her torch. The military line of her shoulders did not waver, but inside, something long buried stirred. She had spent three years telling herself Morris’s death had a rational explanation. The body in front of her, the compass in her hand, the journal in her pocket—all of them insisted otherwise. “Ellis,” she called, voice carrying down the tunnel with calm authority. “I want this entire section photographed, every symbol, every inch of dust. And get that compass to forensics—carefully.” She turned back to Eva. “You’re coming with me to the station. Not under arrest. Not yet. But you’re going to explain every drawing in this book and every reason you happen to be carrying it.” As they walked back toward the floodlights, Quinn kept the brass compass in her left hand, its warmth seeping through her skin. The needle continued pointing toward the impossible crack in the wall, as if inviting her to step through and see what lay on the other side. For the first time in three years, Detective Harlow Quinn allowed herself to consider that her partner’s death had not been mere crime. The evidence had never added up because she had been asking the wrong questions. She tightened her grip on the compass. The salt-and-pepper hair at her temples caught the returning glare of the lamps. Somewhere in the dark behind her, the cracked bone token lay where she had dropped it, a small white lie in a station full of larger ones. The market had moved on, but it had left its shadow behind. And shadows, Quinn was beginning to understand, could kill just as thoroughly as any blade. She would find the answers. Even if they tore apart everything she believed about the world. Even if Eva Kowalski and her hidden clique proved to be at the center of it all. The evidence demanded it, and for once, Quinn was prepared to listen. The platform lights buzzed overhead as they emerged. Ellis raised an eyebrow at the journal in her hand but knew better than to question her expression. Quinn’s sharp jaw was set, her bearing unyielding. She had arrived at a crime scene that made no sense and was leaving with the first fragile thread of one that might. Whatever waited on the other side of that violet fissure, she would meet it with the same precision that had defined eighteen years of service. This time, however, she would not let the explanation be taken from her. Not again.
created_at"2026-03-12T21:30:55.933Z" 3/12/2026, 9:30:55 PM
model"x-ai/grok-4.20-beta-20260309"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency14365
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time29512
tokens_prompt923
tokens_completion3435
native_tokens_prompt934
native_tokens_completion5345
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning2643
native_tokens_cached896
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.0323252
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"33f49f24-a0de-4dcf-872d-ca514e83fbae"
id"58794108-228b-f35a-6945-25c1965ab86b"
is_byokfalse
latency256
model_permaslug"x-ai/grok-4.20-beta-20260309"
provider_name"xAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773351055-pAdEJeHtWOdf4Giue62L"
upstream_id"58794108-228b-f35a-6945-25c1965ab86b"
total_cost0.0323252
cache_discount0.0016128
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"xAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags13
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"she said quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences34
tagDensity0.382
leniency0.765
rawRatio0.077
effectiveRatio0.059
83.92% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2176
totalAiIsmAdverbs7
found
0
adverb"slowly"
count2
1
adverb"softly"
count1
2
adverb"really"
count1
3
adverb"lazily"
count1
4
adverb"suddenly"
count1
5
adverb"carefully"
count1
highlights
0"slowly"
1"softly"
2"really"
3"lazily"
4"suddenly"
5"carefully"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
58.64% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2176
totalAiIsms18
found
0
word"etched"
count1
1
word"velvet"
count1
2
word"weight"
count1
3
word"silence"
count1
4
word"pulse"
count2
5
word"fluttered"
count1
6
word"standard"
count1
7
word"database"
count1
8
word"perfect"
count2
9
word"unspoken"
count1
10
word"traced"
count1
11
word"echoed"
count1
12
word"whisper"
count1
13
word"vibrated"
count1
14
word"warmth"
count1
15
word"eyebrow"
count1
highlights
0"etched"
1"velvet"
2"weight"
3"silence"
4"pulse"
5"fluttered"
6"standard"
7"database"
8"perfect"
9"unspoken"
10"traced"
11"echoed"
12"whisper"
13"vibrated"
14"warmth"
15"eyebrow"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences158
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences158
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences179
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen44
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2164
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions18
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
33.33% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions70
wordCount1638
uniqueNames9
maxNameDensity1.89
worstName"Quinn"
maxWindowNameDensity4
worstWindowName"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Harlow2
Quinn31
Tube1
Ellis9
Kowalski2
Eva19
Three1
Morris3
Detective2
persons
0"Harlow"
1"Quinn"
2"Ellis"
3"Kowalski"
4"Eva"
5"Morris"
places
0"Three"
globalScore0.554
windowScore0.333
84.21% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences114
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"something like recognition"
1"ulse fluttered visibly at her throat, but"
2"something like grief"
3"as if inviting her to step through and see what lay on the other side"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches2
per1kWords0.924
wordCount2164
matches
0"not north, but toward the far tunnel mouth"
1"not waver, but inside, something long buried stirred"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount1
totalSentences179
matches
0"consider that her"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs57
mean37.96
std20.09
cv0.529
sampleLengths
088
133
228
370
428
570
610
718
850
966
1016
1154
1222
1341
1423
1564
1620
1748
1838
1963
2010
2145
2255
235
2449
2517
2663
2769
2811
2923
3044
315
3227
3330
3473
3512
3645
3713
3843
3954
4012
4130
4222
4347
4456
4536
4652
4729
4836
4948
89.72% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount7
totalSentences158
matches
0"been sealed"
1"was singed"
2"been scratched"
3"been positioned"
4"been ripped"
5"been scorched"
6"was prepared"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount2
totalVerbs268
matches
0"was beginning"
1"was leaving"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount9
semicolonCount3
flaggedSentences10
totalSentences179
ratio0.056
matches
0"A bone token—small, ivory, etched with a single rune—lay discarded on the bottom step."
1"Male, mid-forties, dressed in a long coat of peculiar cut—too many pockets, too much velvet."
2"She pressed two fingers against the victim’s jaw; the skin was cold, but the rigor had not yet locked the limbs."
3"The victim’s shoes—expensive, strange glyphs tooled into the leather—were clean."
4"Protective marks had been scratched there—fresh, by the whiteness of the grooves."
5"The beam revealed more symbols on the tunnel wall—identical to those on the compass face and to the ones carved beside the body."
6"Yet the victim had clearly been positioned after death; the neat arrangement of his arms suggested ritual, not robbery."
7"Eva’s nervous habit had returned; she kept tucking the same curl behind her ear though it refused to stay."
8"The pages contained meticulous drawings of the crime scene—drawn before the police had arrived."
9"The body in front of her, the compass in her hand, the journal in her pocket—all of them insisted otherwise."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1653
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount55
adverbRatio0.03327283726557774
lyAdverbCount22
lyAdverbRatio0.013309134906231096
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences179
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences179
mean12.09
std8.42
cv0.697
sampleLengths
018
125
226
314
45
517
612
72
82
916
1012
115
1221
1321
1415
158
1610
1718
185
1921
206
216
2221
2311
2410
254
2614
274
287
2918
3010
3111
3211
3316
346
352
3624
377
383
3913
4011
4143
423
4319
447
457
4622
475
4812
4911
51.58% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats11
diversityRatio0.3463687150837989
totalSentences179
uniqueOpeners62
23.15% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences144
matches
0"Somewhere in the dark behind"
ratio0.007
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount32
totalSentences144
matches
0"She pocketed it without comment."
1"Her brown eyes swept the"
2"She pressed two fingers against"
3"she said quietly"
4"Her gaze tracked outward in"
5"She clutched the strap of"
6"Her freckled face looked paler"
7"She studied Eva for a"
8"she told Eva, then jerked"
9"She led Eva twenty paces"
10"They matched nothing in any"
11"She had never believed it."
12"She turned back toward the"
13"It was warm, far warmer"
14"She rose and followed its"
15"Her pulse kicked up a"
16"She did not ask how"
17"She swept the torch along"
18"She stared at it."
19"She forced her mind back"
ratio0.222
57.22% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount116
totalSentences144
matches
0"Detective Harlow Quinn descended the"
1"The air thickened as she"
2"Camden’s abandoned Tube station had"
3"A bone token—small, ivory, etched"
4"She pocketed it without comment."
5"Floodlights stuttered on the platform"
6"Sergeant Ellis straightened from beside"
7"Quinn gave a curt nod."
8"Her brown eyes swept the"
9"The victim lay supine near"
10"A faint smell of ozone"
11"Ellis offered, voice pitched low"
12"Quinn crouched beside the corpse."
13"The coat fell open to"
14"She pressed two fingers against"
15"Time of death did not"
16"she said quietly"
17"Ellis shifted his weight."
18"Quinn did not answer."
19"Her gaze tracked outward in"
ratio0.806
100.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount4
totalSentences144
matches
0"Whoever he was, he had"
1"If this had been a"
2"Even if they tore apart"
3"Even if Eva Kowalski and"
ratio0.028
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences65
technicalSentenceCount2
matches
0"Shelves had been ripped from the walls, but one object remained untouched: a slender glass vial containing a single drop of quicksilver that moved against gravi…"
1"The needle continued pointing toward the impossible crack in the wall, as if inviting her to step through and see what lay on the other side."
9.62% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags13
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"Ellis offered, voice pitched low"
1"Quinn’s jaw tightened, the sharp line catching the light"
2"she called, voice carrying down the tunnel with calm authority"
91.18% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags9
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"she muttered (mutter)"
1"Quinn murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences34
tagDensity0.265
leniency0.529
rawRatio0.222
effectiveRatio0.118
82.7521%