Run: 2026-03-18-01KM08VJ9BB2N13WPSSTHP0TJP

Run Details

Duration:
24.9s
Cost:
$0.021692
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The door opened on a slice of hallway light and Lucien Moreau standing in it like he had been arranged there for effect. Rory stopped with her hand still on the brass latch, the three deadbolts clicking softly behind her one by one like a warning she had ignored too late. For a beat she only stared. The last time she had seen him, he had been immaculate and infuriating and leaving. He was still all three now, his charcoal coat cut so sharply it looked tailored around his bones, his platinum hair slicked back and dry despite the wet sheen on the pavement outside. An ivory-handled cane rested against his right side, as elegant as a threat. One amber eye and one black eye held hers without blinking. She should have shut the door. Instead she heard herself say, flatly, “You’ve got a gift for timing.” One corner of his mouth lifted, not quite a smile. “You always did know how to greet me warmly, Aurora.” The use of her full name hit harder than it should have. It always had, coming from him. Rory set her jaw and kept her face still. “How did you get in?” “I knocked.” “That’s not what I asked.” His gaze drifted past her shoulder into the flat, taking in the cluttered tower of books on the hall table, the stacks of photocopied notes spilling from a carrier bag, the narrow passage of floor barely visible beneath them. “Eva’s security is overconfident,” he said. “Three deadbolts and a tabby cat are not, in my experience, enough.” At the sound of his voice, Ptolemy the cat rose from a nest of printed pages on the sofa and emitted a long, offended hiss. His tail puffed out like a bottlebrush. Lucien glanced toward him with grave courtesy. “And a hostile feline,” he added. Rory barked a laugh before she could stop it, and the sound made her furious with herself. She folded her arms. “Why are you here?” He didn’t answer immediately. The corridor behind him smelled faintly of rain and cigarette smoke from downstairs. The landing light cut gold along his cheekbone, turned the pale lines of his throat sharp as cut paper. There were shadows under his eyes that hadn’t been there before. They made him look less polished, more dangerous. That should not have made her chest tighten. “I need to speak with you,” he said. Rory let the silence stretch. “No.” His expression changed by a degree, the smallest sign of strain. “I thought you might say that.” “You were right.” “And yet,” he said, looking at her as if he had all the time in the world, “here I remain.” She hated how his composure could still make her feel like she was the one standing in the wrong place. Hated that she could remember the exact shape of his hands, the low warmth of his voice close to her ear, the way he had made being seen feel like a perilous, exquisite thing. Hated that those memories arrived whole and immediate, as if he had only left yesterday instead of leaving a bruise that had taken weeks to stop aching. Rory leaned a shoulder against the doorframe. “If this is about business, I’m not interested.” “It is about business.” “That is a shame.” “Because?” “Because I was hoping you’d at least have the decency to be here for something honest.” For the first time, his face went still enough that she saw the cut underneath it. The stairwell below thudded with someone climbing the steps, then fading away. The flat was warm behind Rory’s back, all radiator hiss and old paper and the comforting, chaotic smell of Eva’s spices from the curry house downstairs seeping through the floorboards. It should have felt like a refuge. Instead it felt far too small with Lucien Moreau standing in the doorway and looking at her as if he had crossed an ocean to do it. He gave a slight inclination of his head, the sort men like him used when they were conceding nothing and everything. “May I come in?” She almost said no again. She should have. She had every reason. But Ptolemy, traitor to the species, had already padded to the edge of the room and was now sitting with his tail wrapped neatly around his paws, staring at Lucien with the cold, judging attention of a magistrate. Rory looked from the cat to the man and felt the old, treacherous pull of curiosity under her anger. “Five minutes,” she said at last. “And if this is some elaborate supernatural ambush, I’ll throw you back into the stairwell myself.” “I’ve always admired your hospitality.” She stepped aside. Lucien entered with the smooth economy of someone who never truly took up space, though the flat seemed to tense around him anyway. He had to angle his cane to avoid the stacked books by the hall table. His gaze snagged briefly on a notebook open to a page of dense, frantic annotations, then on a black pen balanced over a pile of receipts. Rory watched him notice everything and say nothing, which was somehow worse than commentary. She shut the door and turned all three deadbolts with more force than necessary. When she faced him again, he had stopped just inside the narrow corridor, his cane resting lightly against the floor. Ptolemy had retreated to a safer distance, though his ears remained pinned toward Lucien like tiny radar dishes. Rory crossed her arms tighter. “Start talking.” Lucien’s eyes moved over her face, and then away, as if he had decided he had no right to linger. “You haven’t changed,” he said. “Don’t.” “Your temper, then.” “Lucien.” He let the warning sit between them. He had always been good at that, at making space feel like a weapon. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter. “I shouldn’t have come unannounced.” “No,” Rory said. “You shouldn’t have come at all.” Something flickered in the black of one eye, something that might have been pain if she had been in a kinder mood. He drew a breath. “I know.” That, more than anything, knocked the air out of her. Rory had spent so long rehearsing this moment in the privacy of her own head that she had not expected him to make it easy. She had expected deflection, charm, the faintly amused poise of a man who could talk his way out of a locked room. Not this. Not a blunt admission with his hands empty and his expression stripped down to the bone. She looked at him, really looked, and saw the weariness beneath the tailoring. The fine line of tension at the corner of his mouth. The way his fingers rested against the cane handle as if he were resisting the urge to grip it harder. “You’re injured,” she said before she could stop herself. His eyebrows lifted minutely. “Concern becomes you.” “Answer the question.” “I’m not here because of blood loss.” “That’s not an answer.” “It’s sufficient.” She rolled her eyes, but the movement had no heat. “You’re impossible.” “I’ve been told.” “By everyone, I imagine.” “Only by those with poor taste.” Her mouth twitched despite her best efforts. The betrayal of that tiny, useless almost-smile made her angry all over again, because he noticed it and his gaze sharpened with the smallest, most dangerous kind of hope. She hated that hope. She hated that she recognized it. Rory walked past him into the room proper, forcing him to turn if he wanted to keep looking at her. The flat was exactly as Eva had left it that morning, which meant books on every surface, rolled scrolls bound with rubber bands, diagrams pinned to the wall with red tape, and a chipped mug beside a laptop that had been asleep for hours. The window overlooking Brick Lane was cracked open an inch against the damp heat from the curry house below. Somewhere outside, a bus sighed by with a wet hiss of tires. She folded her hands behind her back to keep from fidgeting. “Say whatever it is you came to say.” Lucien’s gaze tracked her movement, brief and unreadable. “You are still angry.” “Brilliant deduction. Maybe you weren’t lying about your business.” His cane tapped once against the floor, a soft, deliberate sound. “Do you want me to say I’m sorry?” “No.” “Why not?” “Because if you’re here to perform one of those elegant, half-assed apologies men like you keep in reserve for when they’ve decided enough time has passed, I’d rather not hear it.” A muscle in his jaw jumped. “Men like me.” “You know exactly what I mean.” “I’m afraid I don’t.” She laughed again, but there was no humor in it. “Of course you don’t. You never did, not when it mattered.” The room seemed to sharpen around them. Ptolemy leapt onto the back of the sofa with a thump and began washing one paw with exaggerated indifference. Rory’s pulse knocked hard in her throat. She saw Lucien absorb the blow without outward reaction, but his fingers tightened on the cane handle until the ivory gleamed. “Rory,” he said, and the way he said her name made it sound like a hand held out in the dark. She hated that too. Hated the old instinct that wanted to step into it. “If this is about whatever secret you were keeping last time,” she said, “you can save it. I’m not interested in being useful to you after the fact.” His gaze held hers. “I did not come here to use you.” “Oh, well, that’s a relief.” “I came because I thought you might still be in danger.” The words landed between them and changed the air. Rory went still. “What did you say?” Lucien’s eyes didn’t leave her face. “Someone has been asking questions about you.” Her first instinct was disbelief, immediate and bright. The second was old fear, colder and more practical, reaching its fingers around her ribs before she could stop it. Evan. London. All the ways the past could still find her if it wanted to. Lucien noticed the shift, of course he did. He always noticed too much. “Not your former partner,” he said, and she hated that he knew exactly what she’d thought. “Though I would advise caution on that front regardless. This is different.” “How different?” “Supernatural different.” That made her almost snort, but the sound died before it escaped. She looked at him, trying to read whether this was another one of his impossible games. The set of his shoulders told her he was serious. The line of his mouth told her he had already decided not to enjoy being serious. That, oddly, made her trust him a little more. “Who?” she asked. “I’d prefer to tell you once you’ve agreed to let me stay.” Rory stared at him. “You show up out of nowhere, after months of silence, and you think you can bargain with me?” “I think,” he said carefully, “that if I had not shown up, you would have been angry. If I had telephoned, you would have ignored me. If I had sent a message through a third party, you would have suspected a trap. So yes, I chose the least terrible option.” “That’s not the same thing as a good one.” “I never claimed to be good.” The honesty of it surprised her into silence. Lucien looked at her as if he knew exactly how precarious the line he had just walked truly was. The flat had gone very still around them. Even the traffic outside seemed muffled, the city pressed into a low hum beneath the floorboards. Rory turned away first, because if she kept looking at him she was liable to remember too much. The fact that he had once stood in a room very much like this and touched the base of her throat with two fingers, not quite a caress, as if he had been memorizing the pulse there. The fact that he had laughed when she was furious and gone quiet when she was afraid. The fact that leaving him had hurt in the specific, humiliating way of discovering something precious had been in reach all along. She braced both hands on the edge of the table covered in notes, grounding herself against the cool clutter. “You don’t get to disappear and then turn up expecting me to make room for you.” “I’m not asking for comfort.” “That’s almost believable.” He was quiet for a moment. When he spoke, the teasing had gone. “I know I hurt you.” Rory’s throat tightened. She kept her gaze on the mess of papers in front of her because it was safer than looking at him while he said that, while his voice lost its polish and sounded like something stripped raw. “I know,” he said again. “And if I had the luxury of choosing differently, I would.” She laughed softly, bitterly. “That’s the thing about luxury. You never seem to suffer from its absence.” “Rory.” “No, you don’t get to say my name like that and make it sound like an apology.” His cane clicked once against the floor. She heard the small shift as he took a step closer, then stopped himself. The restraint in it was almost worse than if he had touched her. Almost. “I came because I trusted you,” he said. “Because whatever is circling you now is connected to a ledger I’m trying to keep out of the wrong hands, and because if anyone can see what I missed, it is you.” Rory slowly turned back to face him. “And there it is.” His brows drew together. “What?” “That,” she said, pointing at him with one sharp finger, “is the part where you make it about work so you don’t have to say the dangerous thing.” For the first time since he had arrived, something genuine and helpless moved across his face. It vanished quickly, but not before she saw it. She saw the truth in the tension at the edge of his mouth, in the way his black eye held hers a second too long. “The dangerous thing,” he said, voice low, “is that I did not stop thinking about you.” The room seemed to tilt. Rory went completely still. Ptolemy, sensing the shift, gave a short, indignant chirp and leaped from the sofa to a nearby shelf, where he sat among a line of rolled parchment like an emperor in exile. Lucien looked as if he had expected to be struck. He probably had. The sight of that made something in Rory’s chest ache stupidly, terribly. Not because he deserved sympathy. Because he had come anyway, knowing exactly what he had to lose. “You’re late,” she said at last, and her voice came out softer than she intended. A faint crease appeared between his brows. “Late?” “To say that.” The corner of his mouth moved, almost a smile, but it was edged with disbelief. “You make it sound as though there was a correct time.” “There was. Months ago.” He exhaled, the sound thin and controlled. “Yes.” The silence after that had weight. Rory could feel everything unsaid gathering around them, all the reasons she should be angrier, all the reasons she should tell him to leave, all the ways the body could remember before the mind allowed it. He stood a few feet away, close enough that she could smell rain and expensive soap and the faint metallic note that always clung to him, something not quite human beneath the surface. She hated that her pulse had started to climb. “You said five minutes,” he reminded her. “I did.” “Have they passed?” She looked at him for a long second. The answer should have been yes. The answer should have been no. Instead she found herself studying the line of his throat, the immaculate knot of his tie, the tiredness at the edge of his eyes, and feeling the old, furious pull between hurt and want until it was almost impossible to tell them apart. Then, because she had always preferred the truth to dignity, she said, “Sit down before you fall over dramatically in my hall.” A strange light entered his face, quick and unreadable. Relief, maybe. Or the beginning of it. “As you command,” he said. He moved with careful grace around the stacks of books, lowering himself onto the edge of the sofa as if he trusted nothing in the room not to bite him except, perhaps, the cat. Ptolemy narrowed his eyes but did not flee. Rory remained standing for a moment longer than necessary, staring at him from across the narrow room while the old ache in her chest shifted into something more dangerous and more alive. This was not forgiveness. Not nearly. He had not earned that. But he had come, and he had said her name like he had never stopped meaning it, and she was suddenly aware of every inch of space between them. Rory picked up the mug from the laptop and set it down again without drinking. Outside, Brick Lane carried on with its wet, noisy life, oblivious and ordinary. Inside, Lucien sat in Eva’s cluttered flat like a man who had finally reached the edge of a decision and was waiting to see if she would let him cross it. “You have four minutes left,” she said. Lucien’s gaze lifted to hers, slow and intent. “Then I suggest you listen carefully.”
created_at"2026-03-18T10:46:25.338Z" 3/18/2026, 10:46:25 AM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency9040
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time24715
tokens_prompt808
tokens_completion4907
native_tokens_prompt753
native_tokens_completion4695
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning1062
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.02169225
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ee065b2-3d1c-43bc-bdd7-28af3b148282"
id"resp_0b964ed5445e971f0169ba8281673881958db6dbd4a1d20a8b"
is_byokfalse
latency230
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773830785-Cbp0kKLfVOtcleZgYFU1"
upstream_id"resp_0b964ed5445e971f0169ba8281673881958db6dbd4a1d20a8b"
total_cost0.02169225
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags23
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"he said carefully [carefully]"
1"he said again [again]"
2"she had always [always]"
dialogueSentences98
tagDensity0.235
leniency0.469
rawRatio0.13
effectiveRatio0.061
72.67% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2927
totalAiIsmAdverbs16
found
0
adverb"softly"
count2
1
adverb"sharply"
count1
2
adverb"warmly"
count1
3
adverb"truly"
count2
4
adverb"lightly"
count1
5
adverb"really"
count1
6
adverb"carefully"
count2
7
adverb"very"
count2
8
adverb"slowly"
count1
9
adverb"quickly"
count1
10
adverb"completely"
count1
11
adverb"suddenly"
count1
highlights
0"softly"
1"sharply"
2"warmly"
3"truly"
4"lightly"
5"really"
6"carefully"
7"very"
8"slowly"
9"quickly"
10"completely"
11"suddenly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
65.84% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2927
totalAiIsms20
found
0
word"grave"
count1
1
word"silence"
count4
2
word"warmth"
count1
3
word"comforting"
count1
4
word"chaotic"
count1
5
word"treacherous"
count1
6
word"flickered"
count1
7
word"charm"
count1
8
word"tension"
count2
9
word"unreadable"
count2
10
word"pulse"
count3
11
word"weight"
count1
12
word"could feel"
count1
highlights
0"grave"
1"silence"
2"warmth"
3"comforting"
4"chaotic"
5"treacherous"
6"flickered"
7"charm"
8"tension"
9"unreadable"
10"pulse"
11"weight"
12"could feel"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells3
narrationSentences181
matches
0"was furious"
1"was afraid"
2"d with disbelief"
79.72% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount4
hedgeCount4
narrationSentences181
filterMatches
0"look"
1"feel"
2"notice"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"started to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences256
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen50
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2927
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions40
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
99.34% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions58
wordCount2270
uniqueNames9
maxNameDensity1.01
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity2
worstWindowName"Lucien"
discoveredNames
Lucien15
Moreau2
One2
Ptolemy6
Rory23
Eva3
Brick2
Lane2
Hated3
persons
0"Lucien"
1"Moreau"
2"One"
3"Ptolemy"
4"Rory"
5"Eva"
places
0"Brick"
1"Lane"
globalScore0.993
windowScore1
38.06% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences134
glossingSentenceCount6
matches
0"not quite a smile"
1"felt like a refuge"
2"seemed muffled the city pressed into a low hum beneath the floorboards"
3"not quite a caress, as if he had been memorizing the pulse there"
4"sounded like something stripped raw"
5"not quite human beneath the surface"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount2927
matches(empty)
88.54% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount6
totalSentences256
matches
0"Hated that she"
1"Hated that those"
2"hated that hope"
3"hated that she"
4"hated that he"
5"hated that her"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs134
mean21.84
std22.9
cv1.048
sampleLengths
023
1106
26
312
420
532
62
75
857
939
106
1125
1255
138
148
156
1617
173
1820
1981
2015
214
224
231
2416
2516
2676
2725
2812
2957
3022
315
323
3378
3414
3538
367
3725
381
393
401
4129
425
439
4422
456
4675
4744
489
497
99.45% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount3
totalSentences181
matches
0"been arranged"
1"being seen"
2"was edged"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount3
totalVerbs376
matches
0"were conceding"
1"were resisting"
2"was waiting"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount0
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences0
totalSentences256
ratio0
matches(empty)
89.17% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2272
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount119
adverbRatio0.05237676056338028
lyAdverbCount33
lyAdverbRatio0.014524647887323943
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences256
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences256
mean11.43
std9.5
cv0.831
sampleLengths
023
128
26
315
433
513
611
76
812
910
1010
1112
126
139
145
152
165
1739
186
1912
2025
217
227
236
2417
254
264
274
2813
2919
3011
318
328
338
345
351
3611
376
383
3920
4020
4134
4227
437
448
454
464
471
4816
4916
43.75% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats16
diversityRatio0.2734375
totalSentences256
uniqueOpeners70
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount6
totalSentences165
matches
0"Instead she heard herself say,"
1"Instead it felt far too"
2"Somewhere outside, a bus sighed"
3"Even the traffic outside seemed"
4"Instead she found herself studying"
5"Then, because she had always"
ratio0.036
62.42% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount65
totalSentences165
matches
0"He was still all three"
1"She should have shut the"
2"It always had, coming from"
3"His gaze drifted past her"
4"His tail puffed out like"
5"She folded her arms."
6"He didn’t answer immediately."
7"They made him look less"
8"His expression changed by a"
9"he said, looking at her"
10"She hated how his composure"
11"It should have felt like"
12"He gave a slight inclination"
13"She almost said no again."
14"She should have."
15"She had every reason."
16"she said at last"
17"She stepped aside."
18"He had to angle his"
19"His gaze snagged briefly on"
ratio0.394
41.82% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount138
totalSentences165
matches
0"The door opened on a"
1"Rory stopped with her hand"
2"The last time she had"
3"He was still all three"
4"An ivory-handled cane rested against"
5"She should have shut the"
6"The use of her full"
7"It always had, coming from"
8"Rory set her jaw and"
9"His gaze drifted past her"
10"His tail puffed out like"
11"Lucien glanced toward him with"
12"Rory barked a laugh before"
13"She folded her arms."
14"He didn’t answer immediately."
15"The corridor behind him smelled"
16"The landing light cut gold"
17"They made him look less"
18"That should not have made"
19"Rory let the silence stretch."
ratio0.836
30.30% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences165
matches
0"Because he had come anyway,"
ratio0.006
84.72% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences86
technicalSentenceCount7
matches
0"Hated that those memories arrived whole and immediate, as if he had only left yesterday instead of leaving a bruise that had taken weeks to stop aching."
1"Instead it felt far too small with Lucien Moreau standing in the doorway and looking at her as if he had crossed an ocean to do it."
2"But Ptolemy, traitor to the species, had already padded to the edge of the room and was now sitting with his tail wrapped neatly around his paws, staring at Luc…"
3"Rory watched him notice everything and say nothing, which was somehow worse than commentary."
4"Something flickered in the black of one eye, something that might have been pain if she had been in a kinder mood."
5"The way his fingers rested against the cane handle as if he were resisting the urge to grip it harder."
6"Inside, Lucien sat in Eva’s cluttered flat like a man who had finally reached the edge of a decision and was waiting to see if she would let him cross it."
81.52% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags23
uselessAdditionCount2
matches
0"she heard, flatly,"
1"he said, voice low,"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags21
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"she heard (hear)"
1"he added (add)"
dialogueSentences98
tagDensity0.214
leniency0.429
rawRatio0.095
effectiveRatio0.041
85.9104%