Run: 2026-03-18-01KM09G41BNFHH3CQP9TF2FFDQ

Run Details

Duration:
18.1s
Cost:
$0.016232
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The first thing Detective Harlow Quinn noticed was the smell. Not blood. Not rot. Not the bleach the uniforms had already sloshed over the tile. It was something thinner and colder, like rain on hot stone, carried up through the mouth of the abandoned Tube station beneath Camden and into the back of her throat. Old electricity. Ozone with a taste of metal. She stood at the top of the last stair, one hand resting on the railing, and let her eyes travel over the scene before she stepped fully onto the platform. The station had no name anymore. The sign had been ripped down so long ago the brackets had rusted into the wall. The tiles were cracked and yellowed, the fluorescent lights overhead dead except for the portable lamps the scene team had set up in a harsh white line. Their glare made everything look flatter than it should have, stripped of shadow and depth. Even so, the place still felt like a mouth waiting to close. Uniforms moved around the platform in careful patterns, boots whispering over grit. A body lay near the far bench, covered with a sheet. Beyond it, in the old tunnel mouth, a cordon tape fluttered in a draft that shouldn’t have existed this far underground. Quinn’s left wrist ached around the worn leather watch there, though the watch face itself was hidden beneath her cuff. She ignored the sensation and kept looking. “About time,” said a voice from beside the ticket booth. Detective Harlow Quinn turned her head. Detective Marrow stood with one shoulder against the rusted frame of the booth, immaculate in a way that felt almost insulting in a place like this. He had his notebook open and a pen poised over the page, as if he’d been waiting to annotate the corpse. “Morning to you too,” Quinn said. Marrow gave her a thin smile. “Didn’t think you’d appreciate the elevation.” “What’s the case?” He closed the notebook with two fingers. “Male, late thirties. No ID. Found by the market entrance.” Quinn’s gaze sharpened. “The market entrance?” Marrow nodded toward the tunnel. “One of them, anyway.” That made her pause. The Veil Market was a rumor to most people and a destination to the desperate and stupid. It moved every full moon. It sold things no decent person admitted to wanting. If this was indeed one of its entrances, then someone had been very careful to keep the police from noticing for a very long time. She looked at the tunnel mouth again. The draft came and went. Not a normal breeze. It pulsed, as if breathing. “Who called it in?” she asked. “Transit security. They found the body after a report of shouting below street level. By the time they got down here, the shouting had stopped.” “And the market?” Marrow lifted one shoulder. “Off-duty now, apparently. No vendors in sight. No crowd. Just this.” Quinn glanced at the platform. No crowd, yes. But there were traces. Not obvious ones, not to a uniform or an overeager rookie. She saw them because she had trained herself to see what other people missed, and because she trusted almost nothing that happened in a place like this. A smear of powder on the floor near the bench. Not dust. Too fine, too deliberate. A line of crushed dried herbs mixed into the grit. And farther along, by the edge of the tile where the tunnel curved away, a scattering of dark beads that glinted when the lamp caught them. She crouched, careful not to disturb the evidence markers, and touched one bead lightly with the tip of her gloved finger. Bone. She straightened slowly. Marrow watched her. “Recognize it?” “Looks like it.” She kept her voice even. “Who’s secured the access points?” “Uniforms at both stairwells. No one in or out without my say-so.” “No one at all,” she said. “Pardon?” She nodded toward the tunnel. “If this was a market entrance, then people came and went before the body was discovered. Locking the stairs now is a day late and a body short.” Marrow’s expression tightened. “Your opinion is noted.” Quinn ignored him and walked toward the covered corpse. The scene team stepped back, making room. The sheet had been laid carefully, almost reverently, but the outline beneath it was wrong. One shoulder sat too high. One leg was bent at an angle that suggested the body had been moved after death. “Who touched him?” she asked. “The first uniform on scene, before we got here. Gloves on.” “Then who moved him after that?” “No one.” That answer told her everything she needed to know about what Marrow thought of the question. She looked at him sharply, but he only lowered his gaze to his notebook. Quinn crouched again and studied the floor around the body. A scuff in the dust. Not from a shoe; the arc was too narrow. A drag mark. Something had been pulled here from the tunnel mouth to the bench and then left in place, or perhaps dragged away and returned. Nearby, a small puddle had dried into a black crescent. Blood? Maybe. But the color was off. Darker than she expected under the lamp, almost green at the edges. She lifted the sheet. The dead man’s face was pale and slack, his mouth parted just enough to show his teeth. He wore an expensive dark coat and gloves made of fine black leather. One glove was torn at the thumb. His hair was damp with sweat or condensation. There were no obvious wounds on the visible skin. Marrow said, “No trauma. Coroner thinks it’s suffocation or heart failure.” Quinn leaned closer. The dead man’s eyes were open, filmed over, the pupils fixed wide. Fear had hardened into the expression on his face. Not the fear of a mugging. Something more intimate. More final. She studied his throat, then his collar. A faint line there, no wider than a thread, circled beneath the jaw. A ligature mark. “No trauma,” she repeated. Marrow’s mouth flattened. “Not visible trauma.” She glanced up at him. “You always this eager to save face?” “I’m eager to have a sensible explanation before you start inventing one.” Quinn stood and looked past him toward the tunnel. “Then explain that.” At the mouth of the tunnel, just inside the shadow where the light failed to carry, a circle had been painted on the concrete in chalk so white it nearly glowed. It was half-erased, scuffed by boots and old water stains, but she could still make out the shape. Not a symbol she knew, exactly. Something made of geometry and intention. Around it, small scraps of wax clung to the floor. A ritual site. Abandoned in a hurry. Marrow followed her gaze and frowned. “Seen by the first team. They thought it was graffiti.” “They thought wrong.” A sudden clatter sounded from the far side of the platform. One of the technicians cursed. Quinn turned toward the noise. A portable lamp had tipped, its beam swinging crazily over the wall until a uniform caught it and steadied it. For one brief second, the moving light crossed the old tile opposite the bench, and Quinn saw more than she had the moment before. Handprints. No, not handprints. Smears, as if someone had pressed both palms to the wall and slid downward. The marks were half in dust, half in something that caught the light with a faint sheen. She walked over. Up close, the smears were wrong in a dozen ways. They were too high for a seated man to make and too low for a standing one to leave without bracing himself. The fingers were spread, then dragged. And between the marks, embedded in the tile grout, were tiny flecks of verdigris. Quinn’s eyes narrowed. Marrow came up behind her. “What?” She pointed. “See that?” “If you’re asking me whether I see a dirty wall, yes.” “That isn’t dirt.” He leaned in, and for a moment his polished calm faltered. “Copper?” “Verdigris,” she said. “On a wall in an abandoned Tube station. Underground. Where the damp would have eaten it off years ago unless it was put there recently.” He straightened. “You think the victim had something copper on him.” “I think someone did.” She turned back to the bench. The dead man’s coat had a faint metallic thread in the stitching. Not enough to matter in ordinary light, but enough to catch the lamps if you looked for it. He was dressed too well for a random trespasser. He was dressed like someone trying not to be noticed in a place where notice was expensive. Quinn lifted the man’s right hand with two fingers. The glove was intact except for the torn thumb, but beneath it, where the cuff had ridden up, she caught a glimpse of skin marked by a crescent bruise around the wrist. A restraint mark. “He was bound,” she said. Marrow’s eyebrows rose. “By whom?” “Not by who,” Quinn said. “By what.” He gave her a look. “You’re going to have to narrow that down.” She ignored him and reached for the glove seam, then stopped. Something glimmered in the fold near the wrist. She asked a nearby forensic tech for forceps, took them, and gently teased out the object. A brass compass, no larger than the palm of her hand, its casing stained with verdigris. The face was etched with protective sigils, so delicate they looked scratched by a careful blade. When she opened it, the needle twitched once, then swung hard toward the tunnel mouth and quivered there. The station seemed to go colder. The tech beside her swore under his breath. “That doing that on purpose?” Quinn shut the compass with a click. “Very much so.” Marrow’s voice sharpened. “Bag it.” She didn’t move immediately. She looked from the compass to the chalk circle in the tunnel and back to the body. The evidence had been telling a story all along. A man arrives here with a tool that responds to supernatural energy. He is bound, perhaps willingly at first, perhaps not. Something happens in the tunnel, close to the market entrance, where protective sigils have been laid down. The body is dragged into view. A crowd is supposed to be there, but isn’t. Someone has cleaned the area just enough to make the wrong impression and left the most important object in the dead man’s hand. Too convenient. Too careless. Or deliberate. She turned the compass over in her fingers and studied the etched face. She had seen symbols like these before, not in any police report, but in the margins of old books Eva Kowalski had shown her after hours with too much tea and a stack of borrowed texts from the British Museum’s restricted archives. Protective. Anti-crossing. Built to point toward places where the world thinned. Her gaze flicked to the tunnel again. Not a market entrance. A breach. Marrow noticed the change in her expression. “What is it?” Quinn slipped the compass into the evidence bag at last. “The body wasn’t the crime scene. It was the warning.” He stared at her. “Warning of what?” She looked at the chalk circle, the smeared wall, the drag marks leading toward the tunnel and away again, and at the fine dust on the floor that no one else had bothered to question. Then she noticed something else near the base of the platform bench: a line of tiny punctures in the metal, as if something had pressed repeatedly into the seat. She knelt and saw the pattern more clearly. Heels. Small, neat, and staggered as if the victim had been forced to sit upright while someone stood close enough to pin him in place. No. Not someone. Something with enough force to keep him still while the ritual was performed. Quinn rose slowly. “It wasn’t a mugging,” she said. “It wasn’t a gang hit. And it wasn’t natural death.” Marrow’s face hardened into disbelief that was only partly professional. “You’re telling me this is connected to whatever nonsense people whisper about down here?” “No.” She met his eyes. “I’m telling you this is connected to what they don’t whisper about.” For the first time, his certainty slipped. “Quinn—” She cut him off with a look and pointed toward the tunnel. “The compass is attuned to supernatural energy. It pointed there because there’s still a rift or portal active beneath this station, or was active very recently. The victim came here with the compass because he knew it. He may have been trying to find the breach, or close it, or lead someone else to it. The chalk circle suggests a containment attempt. The bone token—” She stopped, looking down at the scattered beads of bone on the platform. “—wasn’t dropped by accident. It was used to enter the market. Whoever set this up wanted access without being seen by the crowd. They got it. Something went wrong. The person who died was the one carrying the compass, but someone else cleaned the scene and vanished before dawn.” Marrow stared at her as if she had just spoken in another language. “That’s your theory.” “It’s the only one that fits.” He looked from her to the tunnel, and for an instant Quinn saw fatigue creep under his composure. He masked it quickly, but not quickly enough. He’d seen enough in his career to know when a scene was lying. He just didn’t like the answer when it started talking back. “What are you missing?” he asked quietly. Quinn’s jaw tightened. The question irritated her because it was a good one. She turned in a slow circle, taking in the whole platform again. The body. The compass. The chalk. The smell of wet stone and ozone. The platform lamps buzzing overhead. The fluttering tape at the tunnel mouth. And the fact that, despite the clear signs of a struggle, there was almost no debris scattered across the floor. No broken glass. No dropped wallet. No blood spray. No torn fabric beyond the glove. No evidence of panic in the way panic usually left itself behind. Someone had been controlled. Or something had. Then she saw it: a line in the dust, just beyond the chalk circle. Not a drag line. A tread pattern. Barely visible, because the shoes were narrow and the person had moved with care, but unmistakable once she knew to look for it. Not a uniform. Not the victim. A second person had crossed the threshold into the tunnel after the body was left. One heel print. And beside it, lighter and half erased, the impression of a cane tip or staff. Marrow saw her stare. “What?” Quinn pointed. He looked, then blinked. “That’s all?” “That’s enough.” She could almost hear the shape of it now. One person had brought the compass. Another had come to meet him. The meeting had turned into a struggle, but not a chaotic one. More like a negotiation gone bad in a place both parties understood too well. The chalk circle wasn’t a random sigil. It was a boundary. The body was placed just outside it, not inside. Whoever laid it down wanted something kept on the other side. And the compass needle hadn’t pointed to the body. It had pointed to the tunnel. To the breach. To whatever had opened beneath Camden and been briefly, dangerously close to the surface. Quinn felt the old, sour pressure of memory touch the edge of her mind: DS Morris vanishing from a case three years ago, the unanswered questions, the places no report had ever explained. She shoved it down. Not now. Not here. She drew a breath and gave Marrow the answer she’d reached, because it was the only one that mattered. “The killer didn’t come here to hide a murder,” she said. “They came to make sure no one followed them through.” Marrow was quiet for a long beat. Then he said, “Followed where?” Quinn looked into the dark tunnel, where the portable lights reached only so far before dissolving into black. Somewhere beyond that darkness was the thing the compass had smelled. A tear in the world, hidden under a dead station and a market that moved with the moon. Something had opened. Someone had tried to stop it. Someone else had won, for now. She closed her gloved hand over the evidence bag and felt the brass compass shift inside it, as if trying to orient itself one last time. “Let’s find out,” she said.
created_at"2026-03-18T10:57:38.873Z" 3/18/2026, 10:57:38 AM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency400
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time17836
tokens_prompt923
tokens_completion4264
native_tokens_prompt835
native_tokens_completion3468
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.01623225
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ee065b2-3d1c-43bc-bdd7-28af3b148282"
id"resp_0c6c342105df0fc60169ba8522ed648190b17f76508cb83997"
is_byokfalse
latency178
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773831458-mBPp2CfmYPfgJkrkA9xi"
upstream_id"resp_0c6c342105df0fc60169ba8522ed648190b17f76508cb83997"
total_cost0.01623225
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags16
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"he asked quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences69
tagDensity0.232
leniency0.464
rawRatio0.063
effectiveRatio0.029
78.28% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2762
totalAiIsmAdverbs12
found
0
adverb"very"
count4
1
adverb"lightly"
count1
2
adverb"slowly"
count2
3
adverb"carefully"
count1
4
adverb"sharply"
count1
5
adverb"gently"
count1
6
adverb"quickly"
count2
highlights
0"very"
1"lightly"
2"slowly"
3"carefully"
4"sharply"
5"gently"
6"quickly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
83.71% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2762
totalAiIsms9
found
0
word"fluttered"
count1
1
word"pulsed"
count1
2
word"etched"
count2
3
word"quivered"
count1
4
word"flicked"
count1
5
word"whisper"
count2
6
word"chaotic"
count1
highlights
0"fluttered"
1"pulsed"
2"etched"
3"quivered"
4"flicked"
5"whisper"
6"chaotic"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count1
highlights
0"eyes narrowed"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences246
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount2
narrationSentences246
filterMatches
0"look"
1"watch"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"tried to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences298
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen65
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2762
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions22
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
83.33% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions63
wordCount2258
uniqueNames14
maxNameDensity1.02
worstName"Quinn"
maxWindowNameDensity2.5
worstWindowName"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Detective3
Harlow2
Quinn23
Tube1
Camden2
Marrow19
Veil1
Market1
Eva1
Kowalski1
British1
Museum1
Morris1
One6
persons
0"Harlow"
1"Quinn"
2"Marrow"
3"Eva"
4"Kowalski"
5"Museum"
6"Morris"
places
0"Market"
1"British"
globalScore0.991
windowScore0.833
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences144
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"felt like a mouth waiting to close"
1"as if trying to orient itself one last time"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches2
per1kWords0.724
wordCount2762
matches
0"Not enough to matter in ordinary light, but enough to catch the lamps if you looked for it"
1"not in any police report, but in the margins of old books Eva Kowalski had shown her after"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences298
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs132
mean20.92
std21.49
cv1.027
sampleLengths
010
153
230
376
444
527
610
753
86
912
103
1117
126
139
1460
1521
166
1725
183
1915
2050
2152
2221
231
243
255
2613
2712
286
291
3033
317
3252
335
3411
356
362
3730
3860
3919
404
4154
4211
4335
4420
453
464
476
4812
4912
79.59% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount18
totalSentences246
matches
0"been ripped"
1"were cracked"
2"was hidden"
3"been laid"
4"been moved"
5"been pulled"
6"was torn"
7"been painted"
8"was dressed"
9"was dressed"
10"was etched"
11"been laid"
12"is dragged"
13"is supposed"
14"been forced"
15"was performed"
16"been controlled"
17"was placed"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount1
totalVerbs365
matches
0"was lying"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount0
semicolonCount1
flaggedSentences1
totalSentences298
ratio0.003
matches
0"Not from a shoe; the arc was too narrow."
92.80% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2260
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount109
adverbRatio0.048230088495575224
lyAdverbCount27
lyAdverbRatio0.011946902654867256
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences298
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences298
mean9.27
std8.32
cv0.898
sampleLengths
010
12
22
311
430
52
66
730
86
916
1027
1115
1212
1312
1411
1521
1620
177
1810
196
2026
2121
226
236
246
253
267
2710
283
293
305
314
324
3317
345
359
3625
377
385
394
405
416
4225
433
444
4511
465
473
484
4911
39.26% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats32
diversityRatio0.2684563758389262
totalSentences298
uniqueOpeners80
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount7
totalSentences208
matches
0"Too fine, too deliberate."
1"Then she noticed something else"
2"Then she saw it: a"
3"Barely visible, because the shoes"
4"More like a negotiation gone"
5"Then he said,"
6"Somewhere beyond that darkness was"
ratio0.034
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount56
totalSentences208
matches
0"It was something thinner and"
1"She stood at the top"
2"Their glare made everything look"
3"She ignored the sensation and"
4"He had his notebook open"
5"He closed the notebook with"
6"It moved every full moon."
7"It sold things no decent"
8"She looked at the tunnel"
9"It pulsed, as if breathing."
10"She saw them because she"
11"She crouched, careful not to"
12"She straightened slowly."
13"She kept her voice even"
14"She nodded toward the tunnel."
15"She looked at him sharply,"
16"She lifted the sheet."
17"He wore an expensive dark"
18"His hair was damp with"
19"She studied his throat, then"
ratio0.269
97.02% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount151
totalSentences208
matches
0"The first thing Detective Harlow"
1"It was something thinner and"
2"Ozone with a taste of"
3"She stood at the top"
4"The station had no name"
5"The sign had been ripped"
6"The tiles were cracked and"
7"Their glare made everything look"
8"Uniforms moved around the platform"
9"A body lay near the"
10"Quinn’s left wrist ached around"
11"She ignored the sensation and"
12"Detective Harlow Quinn turned her"
13"Detective Marrow stood with one"
14"He had his notebook open"
15"Marrow gave her a thin"
16"He closed the notebook with"
17"Quinn’s gaze sharpened."
18"Marrow nodded toward the tunnel."
19"That made her pause."
ratio0.726
100.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount5
totalSentences208
matches
0"Even so, the place still"
1"If this was indeed one"
2"Whoever laid it down wanted"
3"To the breach."
4"To whatever had opened beneath"
ratio0.024
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences92
technicalSentenceCount4
matches
0"Beyond it, in the old tunnel mouth, a cordon tape fluttered in a draft that shouldn’t have existed this far underground."
1"Detective Marrow stood with one shoulder against the rusted frame of the booth, immaculate in a way that felt almost insulting in a place like this."
2"Then she noticed something else near the base of the platform bench: a line of tiny punctures in the metal, as if something had pressed repeatedly into the seat…"
3"She closed her gloved hand over the evidence bag and felt the brass compass shift inside it, as if trying to orient itself one last time."
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags16
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags14
fancyCount1
fancyTags
0"she repeated (repeat)"
dialogueSentences69
tagDensity0.203
leniency0.406
rawRatio0.071
effectiveRatio0.029
95.1329%