Run: 2026-03-18-01KM09HH43ZJR27RYFF6JXAQTK

Run Details

Duration:
48.2s
Cost:
$0.041864
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Quinn checked her watch as she went down the last flight of service stairs, more out of habit than because the time mattered. The face was cracked and the leather band had gone soft with years of rain, sweat, and bad decisions. 9:17 p.m. Camden aboveground would still be loud, wet, and bright. Down here the city had been stripped to the bone. The air changed at the bottom of the stairwell. It stopped smelling like dust and rust and started smelling like old electricity, damp concrete, and something sharper underneath it, like struck flint. Quinn reached the platform and paused just long enough to let her eyes adjust. The Tube station beneath Camden should have been dead. Instead, it was alive in the furtive, ugly way of things that were never meant to be found. Lanterns hung from cables where fluorescent strips had once been. Canvas stalls leaned into the abandoned platform alcoves. Shutters covered the old ticket windows, each one painted with wards in chalk, ash, and something darker that Quinn didn’t care to identify. A cluster of vendors stood in a knot near the far escalator, speaking in low, angry bursts. Someone had dragged a tarpaulin over a stall and forgotten to secure one corner; it fluttered against a crate of glass vials with every passing draft. The Veil Market. She had seen enough crime scenes to know when a place had been violated, and enough strange ones lately to know when the violation had teeth. Detective Sergeant Mercer spotted her first. He straightened from his crouch beside the cordon, smoothing a hand over his hair as if that might restore order to the night. He was a broad-shouldered man with a tired face and the expression of someone trying very hard not to believe what he was seeing. “Detective Quinn,” he said. “About bloody time.” “Mercer.” Quinn glanced past him. “Tell me you didn’t let half the Met stamp through here before I arrived.” “Only the people who needed to see it.” “That sentence never means anything good.” He gave her a thin look and stepped aside. The body lay near the old northbound platform sign, half in shadow, half in the dull spill of a naked work lamp. A man, maybe late thirties or early forties. Dark coat. No obvious wallet. No obvious anything. One hand was curled under his ribs, the other open on the tiles as if he had been trying to steady himself against the floor. His throat had been cut with one clean, neat line. That was the first wrong thing. The second was the blood. There was too little of it. Quinn stopped at the edge of the scene and took it in without moving closer. Blood should have painted the tiles, should have tracked from where the man had fallen, should have collected under his shoulders and neck in a dark, glossy pool. Instead, there was a careful stain under his collar and a narrow spread beneath his back, as if someone had arranged him and then waited for the blood to decide whether it wanted to show up. The tiles around him were almost clean. Mercer followed her gaze. “Looks staged, doesn’t it?” “It looks lazy,” Quinn said. “Meaning?” “Meaning whoever did this wanted it to look like they understood what they were doing.” A voice came from behind them, quiet and dry. “Or they did understand.” Quinn turned. Eva Kowalski stood just beyond the tape, a worn leather satchel hanging from one shoulder, her round glasses catching the work light. Her curly red hair had escaped its clip and she was tucking a strand back behind her left ear with the same nervous, repeated motion Quinn had known since they were children. She looked too young to be standing in an underground black market next to a corpse, and too composed to be impressed by any of it. “Evie,” Quinn said. “You weren’t supposed to be here.” Eva’s mouth tightened. “Your call came from a station under Camden that smells like old magic and fresh murder. I thought I might be useful.” Mercer looked between them. “You brought in a museum researcher for a homicide?” “She’s here because your lot keeps calling anything with chalk on it a ritual,” Quinn said. “And because I asked.” Eva pushed her glasses up her nose and looked at the body with obvious reluctance. “The wards in this station are frayed. Something opened. Something either came through, or was taken through.” Mercer snorted softly. “There’s our other theory.” Quinn didn’t answer. She was watching the floor. Near the dead man’s right shoulder, someone had placed a brass compass no bigger than her palm. Its casing had gone green with age, the verdigris dull under the work lamp, and the face was etched with tiny protective sigils. Quinn recognized it at once from the evidence board she’d seen in the briefing room: the compass had come from the Veil Market itself. A Shade artisan’s work, according to the notes. Supposed to point toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal. The needle was trembling, then settling, then trembling again. Not toward the body. Toward the tiled wall behind him. Quinn crouched slowly. Her knees complained. She ignored them. Up close, the dead man’s coat was finer than it had looked from a distance, the wool expensive enough to notice. There was a torn seam at the inside wrist and a faint smear of white dust trapped in the weave. She touched nothing yet. First came the eyes, then the hands, then the shoes. His left shoe was cleaner than the right. That mattered. The left toe had a ribbon of black grime under the welt, the kind that collected in old service corridors and on trackside grit. The right sole was dusted with something pale and powdery, almost chalk-white. Quinn looked up at the platform tiles, then at the man’s shoulders, then back to his shoes. “He wasn’t killed here,” she said. Mercer frowned. “He’s lying here, isn’t he?” “He was put here.” Eva folded her arms around herself. “Or he was pulled through. There are signs of displacement. The air has that feel.” “The air always has a feel with you,” Quinn muttered, and moved closer to the wall. There, half-hidden behind the dead man’s head, was a maintenance panel painted to match the station tiles. The paint had been old once. The screws were not. Two had been turned recently; the heads still held a bright metal glint where a tool had bitten them. A narrow line of grime ran along the bottom edge of the panel, but the dust above it had been disturbed in a straight, deliberate sweep. Quinn tapped the brass compass with one finger. The needle jerked hard, then pointed not at the body, but at the panel. “Back away from that,” Mercer said at once. Quinn shot him a look. “Why?” “Because if your researcher’s right, it may be a doorway.” Eva’s chin lifted. “If my interpretation is right, yes.” Quinn’s mouth almost twisted into something like a smile. Almost. “You’re both assuming the same thing,” she said. “That something nonhuman happened first.” Mercer made a short, incredulous sound. “You don’t think so?” “I think,” Quinn said, “that someone wants us to think so.” She reached into her pocket for gloves, pulled them on with quick, economical movements, and knelt beside the body again. This time she lifted the dead man’s left hand just enough to inspect the wrist. There was a pale ring of irritation there, a line where something had rubbed for a long time. Not a bracelet. A cord. The sort used to tie on a token. Her eyes narrowed. “Where’s his entry token?” she asked. Mercer blinked. “What?” “The bone token. This place requires one to get in, yes?” He glanced toward the tunnel mouth where a bored-looking constable stood guard beside the service stair. “Yes.” Eva’s expression changed by a fraction. “If he had one, it’s gone.” “Exactly.” Quinn lowered the man’s hand. “And if he didn’t have one, he shouldn’t have made it in. So either someone brought him through, someone smuggled him in, or someone here had enough access to falsify the gate.” Mercer looked annoyed now, which meant he was starting to hear her and not like where it was going. “You’re saying the market’s compromised.” “I’m saying whoever did this knew the market’s rules.” Eva stepped closer, cautious around the tape. “The compass is reacting to a rift. That’s not nothing.” “No,” Quinn said. “It’s not. It’s also convenient.” She rose and moved to the station wall, her gaze tracking the compass needle, the panel, the old ads above it. One poster had peeled at the corner, revealing an older layer beneath. The torn edge exposed a sliver of painted line, green and red and almost invisible in the low light. Quinn stared at it for a beat. Then she looked down at the floor around the panel. There. A faint crescent of scuffed powder, no wider than two fingers. A footprint? No. Too smooth. Too shallow. It was the mark of a boot toe pivoting under weight. Someone had stood there recently, facing the panel, then turned away in a hurry. “Mercer,” she said. “Who found him?” “Vendor called Rook. Says he heard a shout from the northbound stalls, then saw a flash of light. When he came over, the man was already down.” “And where’s Rook now?” “Talking to uniform.” “Convenient again.” Mercer’s jaw hardened. “Do you have an actual theory, Detective?” Quinn glanced at the dead man’s sleeve, at the white dust in the weave, at the line of burn on the wrist where a token cord had been pulled free. Then she looked at the compass again. Its needle was still quivering, pointing at the panel with stubborn insistence. “It’s not a rift,” she said. Eva’s brow furrowed. “The compass says—” “The compass says there’s supernatural residue,” Quinn cut in. “That doesn’t tell us what happened. It tells us what was used to hide it.” Mercer folded his arms. “And what exactly was hidden?” Quinn crouched a third time and this time moved with a surgeon’s care. She braced one hand on the floor, took the dead man’s right boot by the heel, and tested it. The sole gave a tiny hollow click. Mercer swore under his breath. Eva’s eyes widened. Quinn looked up once, satisfied, then drew her penknife and slid it carefully into the seam of the heel. A thin shard of something pale worked loose. Bone, carved smooth and worn with handling, no larger than her little fingernail. Not a token worn openly. A token hidden where no one would think to look. “Clever,” she murmured. Mercer stared. “That was in his shoe?” “Yes.” Eva bent forward, interest overtaking caution. “A concealed bone token?” Quinn turned the fragment over between gloved fingers. It was polished on one side, scratched on the other, and had been cut to fit inside the heel lining. A smuggler’s trick. A liar’s trick. The kind of thing someone did when the gatekeeper checked for a token by glance or by touch and not by search. “This man came in with a false entry,” Quinn said. “Or with someone else’s. He wasn’t a customer. He was a courier.” Mercer swore again, lower this time. “For what?” Quinn’s gaze slid to the panel, then to the dead man’s throat, then back to the compass. “Information. Contraband. Maybe a map.” She looked at the market stalls, at the shuttered windows and warded crates. “Something worth killing for. But whoever cut his throat didn’t do it here. They killed him somewhere else, then brought him into the market and staged this mess.” Eva frowned. “Why would they stage a portal event?” “Because everyone in this station believes in the impossible,” Quinn said. “And the impossible makes a useful witness. People stop asking who had access, and start asking what came through the wall.” That landed. Even Mercer went quiet for a second. Quinn stood and brushed grit from her gloves. Her eyes tracked the line of the platform, the stall corners, the overhead pipes, the angle of the old sign. Everything in the scene had been arranged to pull attention upward and outward, toward invisible forces and bad luck and the sort of stories people preferred when they didn’t want to name a human hand. But the human hand was always there. “What did you miss?” Eva asked softly. Quinn looked at her. Behind the glasses, Eva’s green eyes were sharp with concern and curiosity and that old private stubbornness. She’d seen too much of the hidden world to be easily shocked. That made her dangerous in a different way. Useful, too. “The blood,” Quinn said. Mercer blinked. “What about it?” “It’s wrong for a throat cut. Too little on the tiles, too much under the collar. Which means he was cut after he was already laid down. The original wound is deeper, lower, and older. Someone cleaned or covered the real injury, then opened him again for show.” Mercer stared at the body as if it had just betrayed him. “Show?” “To make us think there was panic,” Quinn said. “To make the killing look fresh and frantic. To make the market look unsafe, unpredictable, cursed. Pick your favorite lie.” Eva’s face went still in the way Quinn knew meant she had started connecting the same points. “The compass,” Eva said. “If the panel was a hiding place, the rift might be behind it.” “Or beyond it,” Quinn said. “A service route. A smuggling route. Something that runs under the station and under the rules.” Mercer glanced from one woman to the other. “You’re telling me someone murdered a man, stuffed a token in his boot, dragged him into a supernatural market, and left a compass pointing at a wall to make it look like a portal swallowed him?” Quinn met his eyes. “I’m telling you someone very much wanted us looking at the wall.” She turned back to the panel and laid two fingers against the paint. Cold, but not the dead sort of cold. Drafts leaked from somewhere behind it, thin as a breath through teeth. Not enough to prove a rift. Enough to prove a void. A hidden space. A place a man could stand, or stash cargo, or wait with a knife. Her watch ticked against her wrist. The station hummed around them with the low, uneasy energy of people pretending not to be afraid. Quinn lifted her head. “Get me the vendor called Rook,” she said. “Now.” Mercer frowned. “Why him?” “Because he was close enough to hear the scream, close enough to see the flash, and close enough to move the body before anyone else got here.” “That’s a serious accusation.” “So is murder.” Eva looked from Quinn to the panel and back again, the nervous tuck of her hair forgotten for once. “You think he’s not just a witness.” “No,” Quinn said. “I think he’s the one who knew where the door was.” She pressed the brass compass into Mercer’s hand, the needle shivering at once toward the wall. “And I think the dead man was carrying something that wasn’t meant to leave this station alive.” For the first time since she’d come down the stairs, Detective Harlow Quinn felt the shape of the case begin to settle under her skin. Not solved. Not yet. But the false story had already split, and underneath it was the hard, uglier truth: the murder had been staged to hide access, not to conceal magic. The market hadn’t killed the man. Someone in it had. And if they’d gone to this much trouble to make the scene lie, then what they’d buried in the wall was worth more than a body.
created_at"2026-03-18T10:58:25.041Z" 3/18/2026, 10:58:25 AM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency40802
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time47400
tokens_prompt923
tokens_completion6032
native_tokens_prompt835
native_tokens_completion9164
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning5785
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.04186425
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ee065b2-3d1c-43bc-bdd7-28af3b148282"
id"resp_0cf678aae710a1650169ba85511b348197b8a3e6b9b2285316"
is_byokfalse
latency199
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773831505-r47Bz6BFbyccxP91F94y"
upstream_id"resp_0cf678aae710a1650169ba85511b348197b8a3e6b9b2285316"
total_cost0.04186425
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags26
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Eva asked softly [softly]"
dialogueSentences91
tagDensity0.286
leniency0.571
rawRatio0.038
effectiveRatio0.022
88.67% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2647
totalAiIsmAdverbs6
found
0
adverb"very"
count2
1
adverb"softly"
count2
2
adverb"slowly"
count1
3
adverb"carefully"
count1
highlights
0"very"
1"softly"
2"slowly"
3"carefully"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
90.56% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2647
totalAiIsms5
found
0
word"fluttered"
count1
1
word"etched"
count1
2
word"glint"
count1
3
word"weight"
count1
4
word"furrowed"
count1
highlights
0"fluttered"
1"etched"
2"glint"
3"weight"
4"furrowed"
66.67% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches2
maxInWindow2
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count2
highlights
0"eyes narrowed"
1"eyes widened"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences195
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences195
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches
0"begin to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences259
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen48
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2647
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions36
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
16.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions90
wordCount1913
uniqueNames12
maxNameDensity2.14
worstName"Quinn"
maxWindowNameDensity4.5
worstWindowName"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Tube1
Camden2
Quinn41
Veil2
Market2
Sergeant1
Mercer20
Kowalski1
Eva16
Shade1
Detective2
Harlow1
persons
0"Camden"
1"Quinn"
2"Sergeant"
3"Mercer"
4"Kowalski"
5"Eva"
6"Harlow"
places
0"Veil"
globalScore0.428
windowScore0.167
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences115
glossingSentenceCount1
matches
0"something like a smile"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.378
wordCount2647
matches
0"not at the body, but at the panel"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences259
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs124
mean21.35
std22.06
cv1.034
sampleLengths
063
146
2111
33
426
553
67
719
88
96
109
1173
126
135
146
1586
168
175
181
1915
2013
2182
229
2325
2413
2520
2632
277
288
2982
309
314
326
3364
348
352
3636
3717
386
397
404
4121
4216
4372
4422
458
466
4710
489
4910
85.47% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount11
totalSentences195
matches
0"been stripped"
1"been violated"
2"was curled"
3"was etched"
4"was dusted"
5"been turned"
6"been disturbed"
7"been pulled"
8"was polished"
9"been arranged"
10"been staged"
73.42% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount6
totalVerbs316
matches
0"was seeing"
1"was tucking"
2"was watching"
3"was starting"
4"was going"
5"was still quivering"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount0
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences2
totalSentences259
ratio0.008
matches
0"Someone had dragged a tarpaulin over a stall and forgotten to secure one corner; it fluttered against a crate of glass vials with every passing draft."
1"Two had been turned recently; the heads still held a bright metal glint where a tool had bitten them."
93.40% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1917
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"same nervous, repeated motion"
adverbCount78
adverbRatio0.0406885758998435
lyAdverbCount12
lyAdverbRatio0.006259780907668232
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences259
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences259
mean10.22
std8.31
cv0.813
sampleLengths
023
119
22
39
410
59
623
714
89
918
1010
118
1223
1317
1426
153
1626
176
1823
1924
204
213
225
2314
248
256
269
2722
288
292
303
313
3225
3310
346
355
366
3715
3828
3936
407
414
424
435
441
4515
469
474
482
4922
45.82% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats13
diversityRatio0.305019305019305
totalSentences259
uniqueOpeners79
86.58% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount4
totalSentences154
matches
0"Instead, it was alive in"
1"Instead, there was a careful"
2"Then she looked down at"
3"Then she looked at the"
ratio0.026
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount28
totalSentences154
matches
0"It stopped smelling like dust"
1"She had seen enough crime"
2"He straightened from his crouch"
3"He was a broad-shouldered man"
4"He gave her a thin"
5"His throat had been cut"
6"Her curly red hair had"
7"She looked too young to"
8"She was watching the floor."
9"Its casing had gone green"
10"Her knees complained."
11"She ignored them."
12"She touched nothing yet."
13"His left shoe was cleaner"
14"She reached into her pocket"
15"Her eyes narrowed."
16"He glanced toward the tunnel"
17"She rose and moved to"
18"It was the mark of"
19"Its needle was still quivering,"
ratio0.182
60.65% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount123
totalSentences154
matches
0"Quinn checked her watch as"
1"The face was cracked and"
2"Camden aboveground would still be"
3"The air changed at the"
4"It stopped smelling like dust"
5"Quinn reached the platform and"
6"The Tube station beneath Camden"
7"Lanterns hung from cables where"
8"Canvas stalls leaned into the"
9"Shutters covered the old ticket"
10"A cluster of vendors stood"
11"Someone had dragged a tarpaulin"
12"The Veil Market."
13"She had seen enough crime"
14"Detective Sergeant Mercer spotted her"
15"He straightened from his crouch"
16"He was a broad-shouldered man"
17"Quinn glanced past him"
18"He gave her a thin"
19"The body lay near the"
ratio0.799
32.47% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences154
matches
0"Even Mercer went quiet for"
ratio0.006
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences74
technicalSentenceCount4
matches
0"He straightened from his crouch beside the cordon, smoothing a hand over his hair as if that might restore order to the night."
1"One hand was curled under his ribs, the other open on the tiles as if he had been trying to steady himself against the floor."
2"Instead, there was a careful stain under his collar and a narrow spread beneath his back, as if someone had arranged him and then waited for the blood to decide…"
3"The left toe had a ribbon of black grime under the welt, the kind that collected in old service corridors and on trackside grit."
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags26
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags23
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"Quinn muttered (mutter)"
1"she murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences91
tagDensity0.253
leniency0.505
rawRatio0.087
effectiveRatio0.044
88.0118%