Run: 2026-04-24-01KQ0NSADN87Q4XPHPM7V9DFJ8

Run Details

Duration:
1m 49s
Cost:
$0.142275
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The third deadbolt stuck, as it always did when the weather turned damp. Rory braced her shoulder against the door, thumb hooked around the tarnished chain, and yanked. The bolt gave with a metallic shriek that set Ptolemy hissing from somewhere beneath the avalanche of notes on Eva’s kitchen table. “Hold your horses,” Rory muttered, already irritated. “If this is another leaflet about saving my immortal soul, you’re about five catastrophes too late.” She swung the door open. Lucien Moreau stood on the narrow landing as though Brick Lane had arranged itself around him for the sole purpose of providing contrast. Tailored charcoal coat dark with mist at the shoulders. Platinum hair slicked back without a strand out of place. Ivory-handled cane resting lightly against his gloved palm. His face, that infuriatingly beautiful arrangement of angles and calm, lifted toward her. One amber eye. One black. The years—or what felt like years, though it had been only four months and eleven days, not that she was counting—collapsed into the space between them. Rory’s hand tightened on the door. “No,” she said. His mouth curved, not quite a smile. “Bonjour to you as well, Aurora.” She hated the way he said her name. Not Rory, not Carter, not the easy shorthand everyone else used, but Aurora, drawing out the vowels as if they were silk between his fingers. Once, in a different kind of dark, she had liked it. Once, she had let him murmur it against her pulse while rain battered the windows of his office in Soho and a dead man’s ledger lay open between them. That memory arrived uninvited. So did the heat. She slammed the door. Or tried to. The ivory cane slipped neatly into the gap before the frame could meet the jamb. Rory stared at it. “Move that, or I’ll break it.” “It was made in 1847.” “Then it’s had a good run.” “Aurora.” “No.” She leaned closer to the narrow slice of his face visible through the gap. “You don’t get to turn up here.” “Clearly, I do.” “You don’t get to be clever about it either.” His gaze dropped, just briefly, to her mouth. The glance landed with the precision of a match struck in a dark room. Rory felt it in her ribs, in the foolish quickening of her breath, and hated him for noticing. Hated herself more for wanting him to. From behind her, Ptolemy yowled like a curse made fur. Lucien’s eye flicked past her into the flat. “Is Eva here?” “No.” “When will she return?” “Whenever she decides she’s wrung enough secrets out of the British Library.” Rory pushed harder against the door. The cane did not move. “If you’ve come to buy information, leave a note under the mat and pray she doesn’t hex it on principle.” “I didn’t come for Eva.” The landing seemed to shrink. The smell of rain drifted in around him, cold and metallic, braided with the scents rising from the curry house below—fried onions, cumin, oil gone sweet with heat. His own scent cut through it, faint and familiar: cedar, smoke, something darker underneath. Avaros, she had once thought, before she knew enough to be afraid of the word. Rory lifted her chin. “Then you’re definitely at the wrong door.” “Am I?” “Yes.” “Strange. I was under the impression you were staying here this week while the thing in Silas’s cellar grows a second mouth.” She blinked. Damn him. It was true. Her room above Silas’s bar had become temporarily uninhabitable after one of his suppliers delivered a crate that was not, as labeled, antique gin bottles, but a clutch of translucent eggs pulsing with sour blue light. One had hatched Tuesday. The thing inside had sung in the voice of Rory’s dead grandmother and bitten through a mop handle. She had decamped to Eva’s flat with two jumpers, a toothbrush, and the stubborn belief that Lucien Moreau no longer knew where she slept. “That’s none of your business,” she said. “It became my business approximately thirty-seven minutes ago.” “Oh, did it?” “Yes.” “And how does a second mouth in Silas’s cellar concern London’s most overdressed gossip?” His expression barely changed, but she saw the cut land. She knew his vanities. She had mapped them once with the reckless attention of a woman pretending she was only gathering intelligence. “Because something has put a price on your head,” he said. For one second, Brick Lane went quiet behind him. No passing laughter. No engines. No sizzle from the kitchens below. Just the old boards under Rory’s bare feet and the sudden, ridiculous awareness that she was wearing Eva’s oversized Cardiff University sweatshirt and a pair of leggings with a hole in the knee. Then the city rushed back. Rory narrowed her eyes. “That’s your line?” “It is not a line.” “It sounds exactly like a line. Mysterious danger. Urgent warning. You sweep in with your dramatic coat and your cane and your cheekbones, and I’m meant to let you inside because—what? Because you suddenly remembered a conscience?” His jaw tightened. There. A crack in the marble. “I never forgot it.” “No, you just misplaced it under a pile of contracts.” “Aurora.” She opened the door wider, not because she meant to let him in, but because anger needed space. “Don’t. Don’t say my name like that. You lost the right.” His hand flexed around the cane. The leather of his glove creaked. Four months and eleven days ago, he had stood in an alley behind a shuttered apothecary in Whitechapel while a man with silver teeth held a knife to Rory’s throat. Lucien had looked at her, unreadable as a locked door, and traded the only witness who could clear her name in the Avaros debt murders for a sealed box of demon bone and old coins. Or so she had thought. What she remembered most was not the knife. It was Lucien’s silence afterward, the way he had not explained, not apologized, not come after her when she told him never to touch her again. She had gone home with blood on her collar and fury in her teeth, and he had vanished back into the underworld like smoke under a door. Now he stood on Eva’s landing as if the intervening months were a thin sheet he could slice with the blade inside his cane. Rory hated how badly she wanted him to try. Lucien’s gaze moved over her face, slower this time, less polished. She saw the faint shadows beneath his eyes. The damp at his hairline. A small tear in the cuff of one glove. He looked, she realized with a jolt, not merely serious. He looked afraid. Not for himself. Lucien would bleed out on Persian carpet before giving anyone the satisfaction. For her. The knowledge struck low and hard. “Who?” she asked before she could stop herself. He heard the shift. Of course he did. His voice softened. “A broker out of Limehouse took the contract. The name attached was Malphora.” The old nickname crawled down her spine. Not a name, not really. A mistake from a half-translation in a cursed archive, the title an Avarosi debt collector had given her after she’d tricked him into swallowing his own binding coin. Malphora. Bad omen. Ruin-woman. She had laughed the first time she heard it. She wasn’t laughing now. “How much?” she asked. “Enough to attract amateurs. Not enough to attract the patient ones.” “That’s meant to comfort me?” “It is meant to tell you we have very little time.” “We?” “Yes.” Rory crossed her arms. The movement tugged the sleeve of the sweatshirt up, exposing the small crescent scar on her left wrist. Lucien’s gaze dropped to it. He knew that scar too. Knew the story: childhood, broken mug, blood on her mother’s kitchen tiles, her father pretending not to panic. He had touched it once with a strange tenderness, as if even old wounds deserved courtesy. She pulled the sleeve down. “You don’t get a ‘we,’ Lucien.” Something flickered in the black eye, a star swallowed by ink. “No. I suppose I don’t.” That should have satisfied her. It didn’t. It sat between them, honest and aching. The stairwell light buzzed overhead, throwing him in sickly yellow. A drunk laughed in the street below. Somewhere in the flat, one of Eva’s enchanted index cards fluttered off a stack and landed with a papery sigh. Rory exhaled through her nose. “Say what you came to say.” “I need to get you out of here.” “No.” “Your wards are inadequate.” “They’re Eva’s wards.” “Exactly.” “She’d turn you into soup for that.” “She has tried.” “Lucien.” He stepped closer. Not into the flat, not past the boundary of her permission, but near enough that the air between them changed. Her body remembered before her mind could object: the measured warmth of him, the disciplined stillness, the current beneath. “I am not asking you to forgive me,” he said. “Good.” “I am not asking you to trust me.” “Even better.” “I am asking you to survive the night.” Rory looked at him. Really looked. There was rain caught on his lashes. A thin line of blood along the side of his neck, half-hidden by his collar. Not much. Enough. Her anger snagged on it. “You’re bleeding,” she said. His fingers twitched toward the spot, then stopped. “A disagreement.” “With?” “The first amateur.” Cold moved through her. “Here?” “Two streets over.” “You led them here?” His eyes sharpened. “No.” “But they followed you.” “They tried. They failed.” “You’re sure?” “I am very good at what I do.” “So good you’ve been bleeding on Eva’s doormat for five minutes.” “That is not usually part of the service.” The familiar dry note in his voice almost undid her. Almost made her smile. She bit the inside of her cheek until the impulse died. Ptolemy chose that moment to emerge from beneath a heap of photocopied grimoires. The tabby padded into the corridor, tail high, and stared at Lucien with the hostile judgment of a minor god. Lucien inclined his head. “Monsieur Ptolemy.” Ptolemy hissed. “An excellent point,” Rory said. The cat threaded himself around her ankles and then, traitorously, stepped across the threshold to sniff Lucien’s polished shoe. Rory glared down at him. “Don’t you dare.” Ptolemy rubbed his cheek against Lucien’s trouser leg. “Et tu,” she whispered. Lucien, to his credit, did not look smug. He looked at the cat as if this unexpected mercy might break him. Rory’s grip on the door loosened. She could keep him out. She should. Every sensible instinct she possessed—the instincts that had got her out of Cardiff, away from Evan, through London’s glittering supernatural teeth—told her Lucien Moreau was dangerous. Not only because of what he was, though half-demon was not a footnote one ignored. Not only because of what he did, trading secrets in languages most people should never hear spoken aloud. Because he had found the hidden hinge in her. Because when he looked at her, he did not see a delivery girl with cheap trainers and too much debt, or the failed almost-barrister her father tried not to mourn, or a woman who had once mistaken control for love and paid for it in bruises. He saw all of it and did not flinch. That had been the problem from the beginning. “What happened in Whitechapel?” she asked. The question came out rougher than she intended. Lucien went still. Rory felt her pulse in her throat. She hadn’t planned to ask. She had built whole walls around not asking, mortared with pride. But here he was, bleeding on the landing, and there were apparently people hunting her under a name she had earned by accident, and maybe death clarified a few things. His gaze left hers. For Lucien, that was almost a confession. “I made a bargain,” he said. “I know. I was there.” “No.” He swallowed. “You saw the end of it.” Rory’s fingers curled against the door edge. “The witness was already dead,” he said. “Silver Teeth killed him before you arrived. What he had was not the man. It was his shade, bound in the box. If I refused, he would have shattered it. No testimony. No proof. Your name tied forever to three murders committed by an Avarosi creditor with a taste for theatrics.” The floor seemed to tilt. “You bought the shade.” “Yes.” “With demon bone and coins.” “Yes.” “And then you what? Forgot to mention that?” His mouth tightened. “The box was cursed to answer only in court before the debt tribunal. If I told you, Silver Teeth’s employer would have known. He had listeners in the brickwork.” “Listeners in the—” She stopped, because of course. Of course there had been listeners in the brickwork. This was London. The city had ears in older places than walls. “You let me think you sold me out.” “I had to.” “No.” Anger flared bright enough to steady her. “Don’t dress it up as noble. You chose. Maybe you chose the thing that kept me alive, maybe you even chose right, but you let me walk away thinking—” Her voice broke. She hated that most of all. Lucien’s face changed. The polished mask slipped, and beneath it was a man she had only glimpsed in fragments: exhausted, furious with himself, wanting too much and trained to reach for nothing. “Thinking I valued a relic over you,” he said quietly. The words landed exactly where the old hurt lived. Rory looked away first this time. The flat behind her was a battlefield of Eva’s research: books stacked on chairs, scrolls pinned to curtains, mugs gone furry with abandoned tea. Ordinary chaos, beloved and ridiculous. Safer to look at that than at him. “You didn’t come after me,” she said. “No.” “Why?” A pause. “Because you told me not to touch you again.” Her eyes snapped back. Lucien’s gloved hand tightened on the cane until his knuckles strained pale beneath leather. “And because if I had followed you, I would have begged. I am not proud of that. I wish I were. I wish I could tell you I stayed away out of dignity or strategy. But I did not trust myself to stand before you and accept your hatred without trying to change it.” Rory had no answer. The hallway felt too narrow for the truth of him. He gave a small, bitter smile. “You deserved obedience in at least one thing.” The words found a bruise she had not known he could see. Evan had never stopped when she said no. Not at first in obvious ways, not with fists until later, but with pressure, apologies, the slow erosion of boundaries until she doubted whether she had put them there at all. Lucien knew pieces of that. Not the whole of it. Enough. And he had stayed away. The anger did not vanish. It shifted, complicated by grief, by understanding, by the maddening desire to step into him and let his arms close around her. Rory hated complicated. It had a habit of biting. From the street below came the sudden shatter of glass. Lucien’s head turned. Ptolemy bolted into the flat, fur puffed to twice its size. Every paper ward taped around Eva’s doorframe flared a sickly green, then blackened at the edges. Rory’s heart slammed. Lucien moved. One moment he stood on the landing; the next he had crossed the threshold, his cane angled behind him, his free hand catching Rory by the waist and drawing her back from the door. He did not yank. Did not seize. His palm settled firm at her side for the single necessary second, heat burning through the borrowed sweatshirt, and then released. Even in panic, he remembered. That undid her more than the danger. A thin scraping sound climbed the stairwell, metal on brick. Then a voice, wet and cheerful, called up from below. “Malphora. Pretty Malphora. Come down and settle.” Lucien’s expression emptied. Rory knew that emptiness now for what it was: not indifference, but control locking into place. She shut the door. One deadbolt. Two. The third stuck. “Move,” Lucien said. “I’ve got it.” “Aurora—” “I said I’ve got it.” She grabbed the heavy brass umbrella stand Eva used to store rolled maps and wedged it under the handle. The crescent scar on her wrist flashed as she twisted, shoved, forced the stubborn bolt home. It snapped shut just as something struck the other side of the door. The whole frame bucked. Dust rained from the lintel. Rory stumbled back. Lucien caught her elbow, steady and brief, then let go as if her skin had burned him. She looked up at him. For a heartbeat, with murder clawing at the door and Eva’s wards smoking around them, neither of them moved. His face was close. Too close. The amber eye had gone molten; the black one held no reflection at all. A shallow cut marked his neck, red against pale skin. He was beautiful in a way that should have warned off anyone with sense. Rory had sense. Usually. “You came,” she said, the words barely audible over the next blow to the door. Lucien’s gaze dropped to her mouth again, but this time there was no performance in it, no practiced charm. Only hunger, leashed so hard it shook. “Always.” The answer broke something small and stubborn in her chest. “Don’t say things like that if you don’t mean them.” “I have lied to kings, creditors, priests, and demons older than language.” His voice roughened. “I have never lied to you about wanting you.” Another impact. The top hinge screamed. Rory should have reached for a weapon. Eva kept plenty, though half of them were disguised as stationery and one particularly vindictive letter opener had opinions about being handled by strangers. She should have asked for the plan. She should have done anything except stand there with her breath caught between them, feeling four months of hurt and want twist into a knot she could no longer pretend was simple. “You hurt me,” she said. The words were not accusation now. Just truth. Lucien flinched anyway. “I know.” “I’m still angry.” “You should be.” “I don’t forgive you.” “I know.” The third strike split the wood around the lock. Rory reached up, grabbed his lapel, and pulled him down. The kiss was not gentle. It had no room to be. It was rain and fury and every unsent message, every sleepless night she had cursed his name and then pressed her face into the pillow because cursing did nothing for missing him. Lucien made a low sound against her mouth, shock breaking into need, and then he was kissing her back with a restraint so fierce it trembled. His hands hovered for half a heartbeat before settling at her waist, careful, asking even as the door cracked behind them. Rory answered by stepping closer. He tasted of smoke and mint and blood. His mouth was warm, devastatingly familiar. She remembered the shape of him under her palms, the hard line of his shoulders, the way he went still when feeling struck too deep. He did that now, as if her fingers in his coat had become a blade between his ribs. Then the door splintered. Lucien tore himself away, breathing hard. “We are not finished.” Rory, dizzy and furious and alive down to her fingertips, barked a laugh. “Bit presumptuous.” “Hopeful,” he said, and drew the blade from his cane in one smooth silver whisper. The creature on the other side punched one long grey hand through the broken panel. Too many joints. Yellow nails. A smell like river mud and old pennies poured into the flat. Rory snatched the nearest object from Eva’s hall table: a bronze paperweight shaped like a sleeping dragon. Its eye opened. “Oh, good,” she said. “You’d better be useful.” The dragon paperweight sneezed a puff of sparks. Lucien glanced at it, then at her. Despite everything, the corner of his mouth lifted. Rory’s heart kicked hard. Not fear this time. “After this,” she said, raising the dragon as the hand scrabbled for the bolt, “you’re telling me everything. No omissions. No noble secrets. No brickwork listeners.” “Agreed.” “And if we live through the night, I’m still making you grovel.” His smile sharpened, bright and dangerous. “I shall endeavor to be magnificent at it.” The door gave way. Lucien stepped to her left, blade ready, shoulder almost brushing hers. Not in front of her. Not shielding her like she was breakable. Beside her. Rory set her feet amid Eva’s scattered notes and lifted her chin as the thing crawled in. For the first time in four months and eleven days, the space beside Lucien felt less like a wound than a place she might choose to stand.
created_at"2026-04-24T21:19:28.706Z" 4/24/2026, 9:19:28 PM
model"openai/gpt-5.5-20260423"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency3943
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time109337
tokens_prompt808
tokens_completion5729
native_tokens_prompt753
native_tokens_completion4617
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning70
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.142275
router(null)
provider_responses
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endpoint_id"58e5b336-423e-430b-a2ab-8bc353f0c51b"
id"resp_0f6c93ad0e8d610a0169ebde60ce3c81948695a7c552c3a7b9"
is_byokfalse
latency216
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.5-20260423"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.1; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1777065568-YA1XdSRjxIZIxPc3RQCm"
session_id(null)
api_type"completions"
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upstream_id"resp_0f6c93ad0e8d610a0169ebde60ce3c81948695a7c552c3a7b9"
total_cost0.142275
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"
response_cache_source_id(null)

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags27
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"he said quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences127
tagDensity0.213
leniency0.425
rawRatio0.037
effectiveRatio0.016
91.41% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3491
totalAiIsmAdverbs6
found
0
adverb"lightly"
count1
1
adverb"suddenly"
count1
2
adverb"really"
count2
3
adverb"very"
count2
highlights
0"lightly"
1"suddenly"
2"really"
3"very"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
69.92% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3491
totalAiIsms21
found
0
word"silk"
count1
1
word"pulse"
count2
2
word"flicked"
count1
3
word"familiar"
count3
4
word"marble"
count1
5
word"unreadable"
count1
6
word"silence"
count1
7
word"down her spine"
count1
8
word"tenderness"
count1
9
word"flickered"
count1
10
word"fluttered"
count1
11
word"measured"
count1
12
word"warmth"
count1
13
word"shattered"
count1
14
word"desire"
count1
15
word"charm"
count1
16
word"trembled"
count1
17
word"whisper"
count1
highlights
0"silk"
1"pulse"
2"flicked"
3"familiar"
4"marble"
5"unreadable"
6"silence"
7"down her spine"
8"tenderness"
9"flickered"
10"fluttered"
11"measured"
12"warmth"
13"shattered"
14"desire"
15"charm"
16"trembled"
17"whisper"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells3
narrationSentences287
matches
0"looked afraid"
1"d with pride"
2"n in panic"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount3
narrationSentences287
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"tried to"
1"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences387
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen54
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3485
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions44
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
66.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions114
wordCount2683
uniqueNames21
maxNameDensity1.34
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3
worstWindowName"Lucien"
discoveredNames
Ptolemy6
Eva12
Moreau3
Brick2
Lane2
Rory36
Carter1
Aurora1
Soho1
Silas1
Tuesday1
Lucien31
Cardiff2
University1
Whitechapel1
Avaros2
Persian1
Avarosi1
Evan2
London2
One5
persons
0"Ptolemy"
1"Eva"
2"Moreau"
3"Rory"
4"Carter"
5"Aurora"
6"Silas"
7"Lucien"
8"Evan"
9"One"
places
0"Brick"
1"Lane"
2"Soho"
3"Cardiff"
4"Whitechapel"
5"Avaros"
6"London"
globalScore0.829
windowScore0.667
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences158
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"felt like years, though it had been onl"
1"not quite a smile"
2"and there were apparently people hunting her"
0.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches9
per1kWords2.582
wordCount3485
matches
0"Not Rory, not Carter, not the easy shorthand everyone else used, but Aurora, drawing out the vowels as if they were silk between"
1"not Carter, not the easy shorthand everyone else used, but Aurora, drawing out the vowels as if they were silk between"
2"not the easy shorthand everyone else used, but Aurora, drawing out the vowels as if they were silk between"
3"not, as labeled, antique gin bottles, but a clutch of translucent eggs pulsing with sour blue light"
4"Not into the flat, not past the boundary of her permission, but near enough"
5"not past the boundary of her permission, but near enough"
6"Not at first in obvious ways, not with fists until later, but with pressure, apologies, the slow erosion of boundaries unt"
7"not with fists until later, but with pressure, apologies, the slow erosion of boundaries unt"
8"not indifference, but control locking into place"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount3
totalSentences387
matches
0"knew that scar"
1"chose that moment"
2"knew that emptiness"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs231
mean15.09
std17.5
cv1.16
sampleLengths
013
137
223
35
463
55
626
76
83
913
1073
118
124
133
1415
1510
165
176
181
1922
203
219
2247
2310
2411
251
264
2743
285
295
3057
3111
322
331
3422
352
362
3761
3824
397
408
413
421
4314
4432
4511
4653
475
487
495
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount1
totalSentences287
matches
0"were disguised"
1"being handled"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount6
totalVerbs463
matches
0"was counting"
1"was only gathering"
2"was wearing"
3"wasn’t laughing"
4"was, bleeding"
5"was kissing"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount5
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences5
totalSentences387
ratio0.013
matches
0"The years—or what felt like years, though it had been only four months and eleven days, not that she was counting—collapsed into the space between them."
1"The smell of rain drifted in around him, cold and metallic, braided with the scents rising from the curry house below—fried onions, cumin, oil gone sweet with heat."
2"Every sensible instinct she possessed—the instincts that had got her out of Cardiff, away from Evan, through London’s glittering supernatural teeth—told her Lucien Moreau was dangerous."
3"One moment he stood on the landing; the next he had crossed the threshold, his cane angled behind him, his free hand catching Rory by the waist and drawing her back from the door."
4"The amber eye had gone molten; the black one held no reflection at all."
93.27% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2694
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"red against pale skin."
adverbCount110
adverbRatio0.04083147735708983
lyAdverbCount27
lyAdverbRatio0.01002227171492205
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences387
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences387
mean9.01
std8.4
cv0.933
sampleLengths
013
115
222
37
416
55
623
79
810
98
1013
113
122
1326
146
153
167
176
188
1925
2011
2129
224
234
244
253
2615
274
286
295
306
311
3215
337
343
359
368
3714
3818
397
4010
418
423
431
444
4518
465
4720
485
495
44.32% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats22
diversityRatio0.26098191214470284
totalSentences387
uniqueOpeners101
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount14
totalSentences245
matches
0"Once, in a different kind"
1"Once, she had let him"
2"Just the old boards under"
3"Then the city rushed back."
4"Of course he did."
5"Somewhere in the flat, one"
6"Almost made her smile."
7"Not only because of what"
8"Not only because of what"
9"Of course there had been"
10"Then a voice, wet and"
11"Only hunger, leashed so hard"
12"Then the door splintered."
13"Too many joints."
ratio0.057
97.55% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount75
totalSentences245
matches
0"She swung the door open."
1"His face, that infuriatingly beautiful"
2"His mouth curved, not quite"
3"She hated the way he"
4"She slammed the door."
5"She leaned closer to the"
6"His gaze dropped, just briefly,"
7"His own scent cut through"
8"It was true."
9"Her room above Silas’s bar"
10"She had decamped to Eva’s"
11"His expression barely changed, but"
12"She knew his vanities."
13"She had mapped them once"
14"His jaw tightened."
15"She opened the door wider,"
16"His hand flexed around the"
17"It was Lucien’s silence afterward,"
18"She had gone home with"
19"She saw the faint shadows"
ratio0.306
72.24% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount190
totalSentences245
matches
0"The third deadbolt stuck, as"
1"Rory braced her shoulder against"
2"The bolt gave with a"
3"Rory muttered, already irritated"
4"She swung the door open."
5"Lucien Moreau stood on the"
6"Platinum hair slicked back without"
7"His face, that infuriatingly beautiful"
8"The years—or what felt like"
9"Rory’s hand tightened on the"
10"His mouth curved, not quite"
11"She hated the way he"
12"That memory arrived uninvited."
13"She slammed the door."
14"The ivory cane slipped neatly"
15"Rory stared at it."
16"She leaned closer to the"
17"His gaze dropped, just briefly,"
18"The glance landed with the"
19"Rory felt it in her"
ratio0.776
81.63% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount4
totalSentences245
matches
0"Now he stood on Eva’s"
1"Because he had found the"
2"Because when he looked at"
3"Even in panic, he remembered."
ratio0.016
82.07% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences94
technicalSentenceCount8
matches
0"Lucien Moreau stood on the narrow landing as though Brick Lane had arranged itself around him for the sole purpose of providing contrast."
1"Not Rory, not Carter, not the easy shorthand everyone else used, but Aurora, drawing out the vowels as if they were silk between his fingers."
2"Her room above Silas’s bar had become temporarily uninhabitable after one of his suppliers delivered a crate that was not, as labeled, antique gin bottles, but …"
3"Lucien had looked at her, unreadable as a locked door, and traded the only witness who could clear her name in the Avaros debt murders for a sealed box of demon…"
4"Now he stood on Eva’s landing as if the intervening months were a thin sheet he could slice with the blade inside his cane."
5"Every sensible instinct she possessed—the instincts that had got her out of Cardiff, away from Evan, through London’s glittering supernatural teeth—told her Luc…"
6"Because when he looked at her, he did not see a delivery girl with cheap trainers and too much debt, or the failed almost-barrister her father tried not to mour…"
7"He did that now, as if her fingers in his coat had become a blade between his ribs."
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags27
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags21
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"Rory muttered (mutter)"
1"she whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences127
tagDensity0.165
leniency0.331
rawRatio0.095
effectiveRatio0.031
89.9693%