Run: 2026-05-01-01KQHR4YQTK9EKYN0PVYE43QEN

Run Details

Duration:
44.9s
Cost:
$0.010914
Provider:
xAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The deadbolts scraped back one by one, the sound sharp as accusations in the narrow stairwell. Aurora stood with her fist still raised to knock again, heart hammering against her ribs like it wanted out. The delivery bag from Golden Empress hung heavy at her hip, the scent of lemongrass and fried shallots leaking through the paper. She hadn’t meant to come here. Not like this. Not after two years of radio silence and the last words they’d hurled at each other like knives. The door opened. Lucien Moreau looked exactly as devastating as she remembered, and somehow worse. The charcoal suit was impeccable, waistcoat buttoned over a body that had clearly not spent the last two years softening. Platinum hair swept back from his forehead, one stray lock rebelling against the pomade. His strange eyes—one amber, one black—widened a fraction when they landed on her. Then the mask slid into place: polite, remote, untouchable. “Rory,” he said, voice low and accented, the way it always curled around her name like smoke. “This is… unexpected.” She hated how her stomach still flipped at the sound of it. Hated more that she could smell the faint trace of his cologne—sandalwood and something sharper, like ozone before lightning—wafting into the hallway. Behind him, Eva’s flat looked exactly the same: books stacked in precarious towers, scrolls pinned to the walls with drawing pins, Ptolemy the tabby cat blinking sleepily from the back of the sofa. The flat on Brick Lane had always felt like home in a way her own never quite managed. Seeing Lucien in it now felt like a violation of every careful boundary she’d built. “Eva asked me to bring her dinner,” Aurora said, proud that her voice stayed steady. She lifted the bag. “She said she was buried in research and couldn’t leave. I didn’t know you’d be here.” A lie. Eva had mentioned, very casually, that Lucien might stop by. Aurora had spent the entire bicycle ride from the restaurant telling herself it didn’t matter. That she was over it. That the half-demon fixer who’d once traced the crescent scar on her wrist with his tongue while whispering French endearments in the dark was just another ghost from Cardiff she’d left behind. Lucien’s mismatched gaze dropped to the bag, then rose slowly, taking in the black hair she’d chopped to her shoulders after Evan, the leather jacket that used to belong to him, the way her fingers tightened on the strap until her knuckles blanched. His attention snagged on the scar at her left wrist, visible where her sleeve had ridden up. Something flickered across his face—too fast to name—before the cool façade returned. “She’s not here,” he said. Aurora blinked. “What?” “Eva. She left twenty minutes ago. Something about a contact in Whitechapel who wouldn’t speak to anyone else.” He stepped back, opening the door wider. The movement revealed the ivory-handled cane propped against the wall, the thin blade she knew hid inside it. “You can leave the food. I’ll make sure she gets it.” The dismissal stung more than it should have. She should have handed over the bag and walked away. Instead she heard herself say, “She owes me twenty quid. I’m not leaving until I get it.” Lucien’s mouth twitched—the ghost of the smile that used to unravel her completely. “Of course you aren’t.” He gestured inward with a slight bow that somehow managed to be both mocking and elegant. “By all means.” She stepped over the threshold before she could talk herself out of it. The door clicked shut behind her, and the three deadbolts slid home again. The sound felt final. Ptolemy jumped down from the sofa and wound around her ankles, purring like a broken engine. She bent to scratch behind his ears, using the moment to gather herself. When she straightened, Lucien was watching her with an intensity that made her skin prickle. “You cut your hair,” he said quietly. “Two years ago.” “I know.” The silence stretched, thick with everything they weren’t saying. The flat felt smaller than she remembered, the air too warm, too charged. She could see the research Eva had been working on—diagrams of ley lines, notes in her friend’s spidery handwriting about something called the Avaros Fracture. Lucien’s own handwriting appeared on several pages, precise and slanted. He’d been helping. Of course he had. Aurora set the delivery bag on the tiny kitchen counter, next to a cold cup of coffee and three open books. “Pad Thai for her. Spring rolls. Extra chili sauce because she’s a masochist.” She pulled the receipt from her pocket, smoothing it flat. “Tell her the spring rolls are on the house. Yu-Fei likes her.” Lucien didn’t move to take the paper. He simply leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, studying her like she was one of Eva’s obscure grimoires. “You’re still delivering food.” “Part-time. Pays better than you’d think, and the tips are excellent when you can outrun the drunks.” She shrugged, trying for casual. “Law degree felt like putting on someone else’s skin. This fits better.” Something in his expression softened, just for a second. “You always did hate being told what you should be.” The words landed between them like a match on dry tinder. She remembered the last time he’d said something similar—his mouth against her throat in the dark flat above Silas’ bar, her legs wrapped around his waist, both of them pretending the world outside didn’t exist. *You were never meant to be ordinary, mon coeur.* “Don’t,” she said. “Don’t what?” “Don’t look at me like that. Like you still have any right to comment on my choices.” His jaw tightened. The amber eye seemed to burn brighter; the black one swallowed light. “I never claimed any rights. You made that abundantly clear when you told me to get out of your life.” “I told you to stop lying to me.” Her voice rose despite her best efforts. Ptolemy flattened his ears and retreated under the sofa. “There’s a difference. You let me believe you were just some well-dressed information broker with a shady past. You didn’t think to mention the part where your father is a literal demon lord from another realm. Or that you’d been sent to watch me because of some prophecy Eva found in a bloody Akkadian tablet.” “I told you what I could.” “You told me fragments. You let me fall in love with a mask.” The words hung there, brutal and honest. Lucien pushed off the doorframe, moving toward her with that predatory grace that had always made her stupid. He stopped just short of touching distance. Close enough that she could see the faint scar through his left eyebrow, the one she’d kissed a hundred times. Close enough to see the way his breathing had changed. “I never lied about how I felt,” he said, voice rough. “Every touch. Every night I spent in your bed. Every time I traced that scar on your wrist and wished I could take back whatever childhood pain put it there. None of that was false.” Aurora’s throat ached. She could feel the old pull between them, magnetic and dangerous. Two years hadn’t dulled it. If anything, absence had sharpened the edges. “You were using me.” “I was protecting you.” His hand lifted, hesitated, then cupped her cheek with a gentleness that nearly undid her. His thumb brushed the corner of her mouth. “My father’s people wanted you because of what you are. What you carry in your blood from your mother’s line. I was supposed to observe. Report. Instead I fell so hard I forgot the mission entirely. When Evan found out what I was and tried to use it against you—” “You put a blade through his shoulder.” “He was going to kill you.” Lucien’s voice dropped to a whisper. “I would have burned the city down before I let that happen.” She believed him. That was the worst part. She’d always believed the important things, even when the lies had stacked up like kindling. His hand was warm against her skin, thumb stroking now in small, unconscious circles that sent heat spiraling down her spine. The flat was too quiet. Even the traffic on Brick Lane seemed to have receded, leaving only the sound of their breathing and the distant rumble of a train. “I hated you for leaving,” she admitted, the words scraping out of her. “Then I hated myself for missing you. I kept your jacket. I wear it when it rains because it still smells like you, and I tell myself it’s just practical. I hate how much I still want you.” Lucien made a low sound in his throat, half pain, half relief. His forehead dropped to rest against hers, careful, like she might shatter. “Rory.” “Don’t call me that. Not unless you mean it.” “I have never meant anything more.” His free hand found her waist, fingers splaying across her back beneath the leather. “I stayed away because I thought you were safer. Eva said you were building something new. A life without demons and prophecies and men who lie for a living. I told myself I was doing the right thing by honoring your wish.” “I was miserable.” “So was I.” The confession cracked something open inside her chest. She grabbed fistfuls of his waistcoat, the fabric smooth and expensive under her delivery-roughened fingers. When she tilted her face up, their mouths were a breath apart. His eyes searched hers—amber and black, human and not, both filled with the same desperate hunger. “Tell me to leave,” he whispered against her lips. “Tell me you don’t want this and I’ll walk out that door and never come back. I swear it on every realm I’ve walked through.” She should. The smart thing—the safe thing—would be to push him away, hand over the food, and go home to her flat above Silas’ bar. Rebuild the walls. Pretend the half-demon with the cane and the devastating mouth hadn’t just walked back into her life carrying every feeling she’d tried to bury. Instead she kissed him. It was nothing like the careful, tentative reunion she might have imagined. This was two years of grief and longing and fury poured into the press of mouths and the clash of teeth. Lucien groaned, the sound vibrating through her as he backed her against the counter. The delivery bag crinkled beneath her hip. She didn’t care. His tongue traced the seam of her lips and she opened for him, tasting coffee and the faint iron tang that was purely Lucien. His cane clattered to the floor as both hands found her waist, lifting her onto the counter like she weighed nothing. She wrapped her legs around him, heels digging into the back of his thighs. The tailored suit felt indecent against her jeans. His mouth left hers to trail down her throat, teeth grazing the spot that had always made her gasp. When he sucked lightly over her pulse, her head fell back, knocking into a cabinet. “Careful,” he murmured, the word half-laugh, half-prayer. His hand slid under her jacket—his jacket—palm hot against her ribs. “Eva would murder us both if we break her favorite mug.” “Let her.” Aurora tugged at his perfect hair, wrecking the slicked-back style until platinum strands fell across his forehead. She wanted him messy. Wanted him real. “I’ve waited two years for this. The mug can wait another five minutes.” His laugh was dark, delighted. He kissed her again, slower this time, savoring. One hand worked at the zipper of her jacket while the other traced the line of her scar with reverent fingers. When the leather slid off her shoulders, he paused to look at her—really look. The black tank top she wore underneath left little to the imagination. His heterochromatic eyes darkened. “Beautiful,” he said, the word rough in French and English both. “Still so beautiful it hurts to look at you.” She pulled him back down by his tie, needing his mouth on hers again. The kiss turned hungry, desperate. His hands mapped her like he was memorizing every new inch— the slight definition in her arms from bicycling across London, the way she shivered when his fingertips grazed the underside of her breast. She yanked his waistcoat open, buttons pinging somewhere across the floor. Ptolemy would probably swallow one and Eva would never let them live it down, but Aurora couldn’t bring herself to care. When his palm finally closed over her breast, thumb circling through thin cotton, she arched into him with a broken sound. He swallowed it, drinking down every gasp and whimper like they belonged to him. Maybe they did. Maybe they always had. His mouth followed the path of his hands, kissing down her sternum, teeth closing gently over her nipple through fabric until she cried out. The counter was hard beneath her, but she barely felt it. There was only Lucien—his scent, his heat, the careful way he touched her even as hunger made his movements sharp. When he dropped to his knees between her spread thighs, she nearly lost her mind. “Luc—” The old nickname slipped out before she could stop it. He looked up at her through those impossible eyes, hair wild, lips reddened from kissing. The expression on his face was almost worshipful. “Let me,” he said. “Please. I’ve dreamed of this for two years. Let me taste you again.” She should have been embarrassed by how quickly she nodded, by the way her hands fumbled at her own jeans. But Lucien helped, peeling denim and lace down her legs with a reverence that made her chest ache. He pressed kisses to the inside of her knee, then higher, mapping the path with his mouth until she was trembling. When his tongue finally found her, slow and deliberate, her head thunked back against the cabinet again. The sound she made was indecent. Lucien hummed in approval, the vibration sending sparks up her spine. He took his time, learning her again like she was new territory—long, luxurious strokes followed by clever flicks that had her gripping his hair hard enough to hurt. One hand pressed against her stomach, holding her steady as she writhed. The other slid two fingers inside her without warning, curling just right. The orgasm hit her like a freight train. She came with his name on her lips, thighs clamped around his shoulders, vision whiting out. He worked her through it, gentling his movements but not stopping until she was shaking and oversensitive and begging in incoherent fragments. When he finally rose, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand in a gesture so filthy it sent aftershocks through her, Aurora reached for him with unsteady hands. His trousers were tented obscenely. She palmed him through the fabric and was rewarded with a punched-out groan. “Bed,” she managed. “Or the sofa. Or the bloody floor. I don’t care.” Lucien laughed again—that rich, dark sound she’d missed more than air—and lifted her off the counter like she was made of glass. Her legs wrapped around his waist as he carried her the few steps to Eva’s cluttered bedroom. Books went flying when he swept them off the bed with one arm. Neither of them cared. They fell together in a tangle of limbs and half-removed clothing. His suit jacket and waistcoat were long gone. She attacked the buttons of his shirt with single-minded determination, needing skin. When she finally got it open, she pressed her face to his chest, breathing him in. The raised scar over his heart from some battle in Avaros was still there. She kissed it, then bit down gently, feeling his hips jerk against her in response. “Wicked woman,” he growled, but there was only adoration in it. He kicked off the rest of his clothes with surprising grace for a man who favored three-piece suits and antique canes. When he settled between her thighs again, bare skin to bare skin, the feeling was almost too much. Aurora reached between them, wrapping her fingers around him. He was hot and heavy and familiar, the velvet slide of him against her palm making her ache all over again. Lucien caught her wrist—the scarred one—and brought it to his mouth. He kissed the crescent mark with heartbreaking tenderness, then sucked her finger into his mouth as she stroked him. The dual sensation short-circuited her brain. “Now,” she demanded. “Luc, please.” He didn’t make her ask twice. The first push inside her stole her breath. They both froze, foreheads pressed together, sharing air. For one perfect moment there was no prophecy, no demon father, no complicated past. Just the two of them, joined so completely she didn’t know where she ended and he began. Then he moved, and everything dissolved into heat and rhythm and the slick sound of bodies coming together after too long apart. Aurora met every thrust, nails digging into his back, heels locked behind his hips. He whispered to her in French and English and something older, darker—words that sounded like devotion and sin all at once. She answered with his name, over and over, like a prayer or a curse. When she came again, clenching around him, Lucien followed with a guttural sound that might have been her name. He buried his face in her neck as he spilled inside her, hips stuttering, body trembling with the force of it. For long moments afterward they simply breathed, sweat cooling on their skin, hearts hammering against each other. Eventually he shifted his weight, rolling them so she sprawled across his chest. His fingers traced idle patterns on her bare back. The flat was quiet except for Ptolemy’s curious meow from the doorway and the distant sounds of Brick Lane waking up for the evening rush. Aurora pressed her lips to the center of his chest, right over that old scar. “This doesn’t fix everything,” she whispered. “I know.” His hand slid into her hair, cradling her head. “But it’s a beginning. If you’ll have it. If you’ll have me—demon blood, secrets, ivory cane and all.” She lifted her head to look at him. The messy hair, the swollen lips, the way both his eyes had gone soft and warm. Her heart did something complicated and painful and entirely welcome. “I kept your jacket,” she said, like that explained everything. Lucien’s smile was slow and devastating. He leaned up to kiss her, soft and sweet and full of promise. “Then I suppose I’ll have to stay. Someone needs to make sure you don’t wear it out in the rain anymore. It’s terribly bad for the leather.” She laughed, the sound surprising them both with its lightness. Outside, London kept turning—demons and prophecies and curry houses and all. Inside Eva’s cluttered flat, with takeout cooling on the counter and a very disgruntled tabby cat demanding dinner, Aurora Carter pressed her forehead to Lucien Moreau’s and let herself believe, for the first time in two years, that some histories were worth rewriting. The spring rolls could wait.
created_at"2026-05-01T12:27:52.446Z" 5/1/2026, 12:27:52 PM
model"x-ai/grok-4.20-20260309"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency374
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time44744
tokens_prompt808
tokens_completion4917
native_tokens_prompt849
native_tokens_completion3968
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached64
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.01091405
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"3ecee37f-b217-4093-87fb-aaf0afe307af"
id"420c8a11-962b-fda6-0952-0e958c1b1747"
is_byokfalse
latency128
model_permaslug"x-ai/grok-4.20-20260309"
provider_name"xAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.1; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1777638472-KpqsRXjUKaFCBvZ0cm7r"
session_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1777638472-Oly8Mp1KOlv8TFDxmswg"
upstream_id"420c8a11-962b-fda6-0952-0e958c1b1747"
total_cost0.01091405
cache_discount0.0000672
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"xAI"
response_cache_source_id(null)

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags29
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"He stepped back [back]"
1"he said quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences65
tagDensity0.446
leniency0.892
rawRatio0.069
effectiveRatio0.062
84.44% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3214
totalAiIsmAdverbs10
found
0
adverb"very"
count2
1
adverb"slowly"
count1
2
adverb"completely"
count2
3
adverb"lightly"
count1
4
adverb"really"
count1
5
adverb"gently"
count2
6
adverb"quickly"
count1
highlights
0"very"
1"slowly"
2"completely"
3"lightly"
4"really"
5"gently"
6"quickly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
59.55% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3214
totalAiIsms26
found
0
word"silence"
count2
1
word"stomach"
count2
2
word"traced"
count5
3
word"flickered"
count1
4
word"unravel"
count1
5
word"intensity"
count1
6
word"charged"
count1
7
word"eyebrow"
count1
8
word"could feel"
count1
9
word"magnetic"
count1
10
word"whisper"
count1
11
word"down her spine"
count1
12
word"pulse"
count1
13
word"perfect"
count2
14
word"familiar"
count1
15
word"velvet"
count1
16
word"tenderness"
count1
17
word"clenching"
count1
18
word"weight"
count1
highlights
0"silence"
1"stomach"
2"traced"
3"flickered"
4"unravel"
5"intensity"
6"charged"
7"eyebrow"
8"could feel"
9"magnetic"
10"whisper"
11"down her spine"
12"pulse"
13"perfect"
14"familiar"
15"velvet"
16"tenderness"
17"clenching"
18"weight"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences200
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount4
narrationSentences200
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"managed to"
1"seemed to"
2"tried to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences237
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen56
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans1
markdownWords9
totalWords3190
ratio0.003
matches
0"You were never meant to be ordinary, mon coeur."
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions37
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions70
wordCount2508
uniqueNames18
maxNameDensity0.84
worstName"Lucien"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Lucien"
discoveredNames
Golden1
Empress1
Moreau2
Eva7
Ptolemy5
Brick3
Lane3
Lucien21
French3
Cardiff1
Evan1
Aurora13
Avaros2
Fracture1
Rebuild1
English2
London2
Carter1
persons
0"Empress"
1"Moreau"
2"Eva"
3"Ptolemy"
4"Lucien"
5"Evan"
6"Aurora"
7"Carter"
places
0"Golden"
1"Brick"
2"Lane"
3"French"
4"Cardiff"
5"Avaros"
6"London"
globalScore1
windowScore1
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences160
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"felt like home in a way her own never q"
1"felt like a violation of every careful"
2"sounded like devotion and sin all at once"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount3190
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences237
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs80
mean39.88
std26.86
cv0.674
sampleLengths
084
13
268
320
4100
535
664
772
85
93
1054
1135
1236
1374
147
153
162
1764
1856
1929
2034
2119
2255
233
242
2517
2635
2779
286
2913
3062
3146
3230
3377
347
3524
3673
3751
3825
399
4062
413
423
4351
4434
4552
464
47102
4856
4929
98.25% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount4
totalSentences200
matches
0"been embarrassed"
1"were tented"
2"was rewarded"
3"was made"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs445
matches
0"was watching"
1"weren’t saying"
2"was memorizing"
3"was shaking"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount24
semicolonCount1
flaggedSentences18
totalSentences237
ratio0.076
matches
0"His strange eyes—one amber, one black—widened a fraction when they landed on her."
1"Hated more that she could smell the faint trace of his cologne—sandalwood and something sharper, like ozone before lightning—wafting into the hallway."
2"Something flickered across his face—too fast to name—before the cool façade returned."
3"Lucien’s mouth twitched—the ghost of the smile that used to unravel her completely."
4"She could see the research Eva had been working on—diagrams of ley lines, notes in her friend’s spidery handwriting about something called the Avaros Fracture."
5"She remembered the last time he’d said something similar—his mouth against her throat in the dark flat above Silas’ bar, her legs wrapped around his waist, both of them pretending the world outside didn’t exist."
6"The amber eye seemed to burn brighter; the black one swallowed light."
7"His eyes searched hers—amber and black, human and not, both filled with the same desperate hunger."
8"The smart thing—the safe thing—would be to push him away, hand over the food, and go home to her flat above Silas’ bar."
9"His hand slid under her jacket—his jacket—palm hot against her ribs."
10"When the leather slid off her shoulders, he paused to look at her—really look."
11"His hands mapped her like he was memorizing every new inch— the slight definition in her arms from bicycling across London, the way she shivered when his fingertips grazed the underside of her breast."
12"There was only Lucien—his scent, his heat, the careful way he touched her even as hunger made his movements sharp."
13"He took his time, learning her again like she was new territory—long, luxurious strokes followed by clever flicks that had her gripping his hair hard enough to hurt."
14"Lucien laughed again—that rich, dark sound she’d missed more than air—and lifted her off the counter like she was made of glass."
15"Lucien caught her wrist—the scarred one—and brought it to his mouth."
16"He whispered to her in French and English and something older, darker—words that sounded like devotion and sin all at once."
17"Outside, London kept turning—demons and prophecies and curry houses and all."
94.11% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1177
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount55
adverbRatio0.04672897196261682
lyAdverbCount12
lyAdverbRatio0.010195412064570943
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences237
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences237
mean13.46
std8.78
cv0.652
sampleLengths
016
119
222
36
43
518
63
712
820
914
1013
119
1217
133
1412
1522
1633
1718
1815
1915
204
2116
222
2310
2415
255
2632
2743
2817
2912
305
312
321
3325
3418
3511
368
3710
3817
3913
4020
413
4213
4313
444
4516
4613
4715
487
493
43.67% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats15
diversityRatio0.2742616033755274
totalSentences237
uniqueOpeners65
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount10
totalSentences191
matches
0"Then the mask slid into"
1"Instead she heard herself say,"
2"Of course he had."
3"Even the traffic on Brick"
4"Instead she kissed him."
5"Maybe they did."
6"Maybe they always had."
7"Just the two of them,"
8"Then he moved, and everything"
9"Eventually he shifted his weight,"
ratio0.052
48.27% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount82
totalSentences191
matches
0"She hadn’t meant to come"
1"His strange eyes—one amber, one"
2"he said, voice low and"
3"She hated how her stomach"
4"She lifted the bag."
5"His attention snagged on the"
6"He stepped back, opening the"
7"She should have handed over"
8"He gestured inward with a"
9"She stepped over the threshold"
10"She bent to scratch behind"
11"he said quietly"
12"She could see the research"
13"He’d been helping."
14"She pulled the receipt from"
15"He simply leaned against the"
16"She shrugged, trying for casual"
17"She remembered the last time"
18"*You were never meant to"
19"His jaw tightened."
ratio0.429
67.33% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount150
totalSentences191
matches
0"The deadbolts scraped back one"
1"Aurora stood with her fist"
2"The delivery bag from Golden"
3"She hadn’t meant to come"
4"The door opened."
5"Lucien Moreau looked exactly as"
6"The charcoal suit was impeccable,"
7"Platinum hair swept back from"
8"His strange eyes—one amber, one"
9"he said, voice low and"
10"She hated how her stomach"
11"The flat on Brick Lane"
12"Aurora said, proud that her"
13"She lifted the bag."
14"Eva had mentioned, very casually,"
15"Aurora had spent the entire"
16"That she was over it."
17"That the half-demon fixer who’d"
18"Lucien’s mismatched gaze dropped to"
19"His attention snagged on the"
ratio0.785
26.18% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences191
matches
0"If anything, absence had sharpened"
ratio0.005
54.36% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences113
technicalSentenceCount14
matches
0"The charcoal suit was impeccable, waistcoat buttoned over a body that had clearly not spent the last two years softening."
1"That the half-demon fixer who’d once traced the crescent scar on her wrist with his tongue while whispering French endearments in the dark was just another ghos…"
2"Lucien’s mismatched gaze dropped to the bag, then rose slowly, taking in the black hair she’d chopped to her shoulders after Evan, the leather jacket that used …"
3"When she straightened, Lucien was watching her with an intensity that made her skin prickle."
4"She could see the research Eva had been working on—diagrams of ley lines, notes in her friend’s spidery handwriting about something called the Avaros Fracture."
5"Lucien pushed off the doorframe, moving toward her with that predatory grace that had always made her stupid."
6"His hand was warm against her skin, thumb stroking now in small, unconscious circles that sent heat spiraling down her spine."
7"His tongue traced the seam of her lips and she opened for him, tasting coffee and the faint iron tang that was purely Lucien."
8"His mouth left hers to trail down her throat, teeth grazing the spot that had always made her gasp."
9"His mouth followed the path of his hands, kissing down her sternum, teeth closing gently over her nipple through fabric until she cried out."
10"But Lucien helped, peeling denim and lace down her legs with a reverence that made her chest ache."
11"He took his time, learning her again like she was new territory—long, luxurious strokes followed by clever flicks that had her gripping his hair hard enough to …"
12"He kicked off the rest of his clothes with surprising grace for a man who favored three-piece suits and antique canes."
13"He buried his face in her neck as he spilled inside her, hips stuttering, body trembling with the force of it."
56.03% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags29
uselessAdditionCount4
matches
0"Aurora said, proud that her voice stayed steady"
1"he said, voice rough"
2"she admitted, the words scraping out of her"
3"free hand found, fingers splaying across her back beneath the leather"
42.31% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags16
fancyCount7
fancyTags
0"she heard (hear)"
1"she admitted (admit)"
2"he whispered (whisper)"
3"he murmured (murmur)"
4"he growled (growl)"
5"she demanded (demand)"
6"she whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences65
tagDensity0.246
leniency0.492
rawRatio0.438
effectiveRatio0.215
82.4836%