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Run: 2026-05-01-01KQHRGZ9YTPY0WHCRKPR2N9HM
Run Details
Model:
Grok 4.20
Test:
Bad Writing Habits
Scenario:
Romance: separated couple reunites
Duration:
39.6s
Cost:
$0.007852
Provider:
xAI
Evaluation summary
Score
Evaluator
Details Link
92.86%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
(details)
90.77%
AI-ism adverb frequency
(details)
80.00%
AI-ism character names
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism location names
(details)
46.93%
AI-ism word frequency
(details)
100.00%
Cliché density
(details)
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
(details)
100.00%
Filter word density
(details)
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
(details)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
(details)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
(details)
0.00%
Name drop frequency
(details)
18.42%
Narrator intent-glossing
(details)
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
(details)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
(details)
100.00%
Paragraph length variance
(details)
100.00%
Passive voice overuse
(details)
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
(details)
100.00%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
(details)
92.27%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
(details)
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
(details)
100.00%
Sentence length variance
(details)
56.40%
Sentence opener variety
(details)
64.72%
Adverb-first sentence starts
(details)
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
(details)
32.82%
Subject-first sentence starts
(details)
48.54%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
(details)
100.00%
Technical jargon density
(details)
86.54%
Useless dialogue additions
(details)
7.14%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
(details)
80.5806%
Overall
Model input
System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Romance genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>
Model response
Messages
Meta
AI
Rory's knuckles hovered an inch
from the wood, heart slamming against her ribs like it wanted out. She rapped twice instead.
The deadbolts on Eva's door
clacked open one by one, each click tightening the knot in her gut. The last one slid free. The door cracked.
Eva's face appeared, pale under
the hallway light, hair twisted up with a pencil.
Her eyes widened, the green
of them sharpening to something between shock and the old
familiar
fire. "Rory." The single word carried
weight
, years of it.
Rory swallowed, tasting the curry
steam drifting up from the restaurant below. "You look like hell,"
Eva said, but she stepped
back anyway, the movement pulling the door wider. "Come in before Mrs.
Patel
starts asking questions." Rory slipped inside. The flat swallowed her immediately, books stacked in precarious towers, scrolls unrolling across the tiny kitchen table like drunk party guests.
Ptolemy lifted his head from
the windowsill,
flicked
an ear, then went back to judging the world with half-lidded eyes.
The tabby had never liked
her much. Smart cat.
Eva shut the door and
leaned against it, arms folded.
The thin grey cardigan she
wore slipped off one shoulder, revealing the edge of a tattoo Rory remembered
tracing
with her tongue three years ago. Heat crawled up Rory's neck. "You didn't call," Eva said. Flat. Controlled.
The barrister's daughter in her
voice, all precision and hidden blades. "Would you have answered?" A beat.
Eva's mouth twitched, not quite
a smile. "Probably not."
Rory set her delivery bag
down, the Golden Empress logo peeling at one corner. The scent of garlic and star anise clung to her jacket.
She'd come straight from her
last drop, bike still chained to the lamppost downstairs, tyres wet from the earlier rain. No time to change. No time to talk herself out of this. "I need your help." Eva laughed once, sharp as glass breaking.
She pushed off the door
and crossed to the kettle, movements tight. Water hissed as she filled it. "Of course you do. It's been what, eighteen months? And you show up needing help." "Seventeen." The correction slipped out before Rory could stop it. She winced. Eva's shoulders stiffened, but she didn't turn. The kettle clicked on. Steam
began to
rise. "Seventeen months, three days." Eva's voice dropped. "Not that anyone's counting." The scar on Rory's wrist itched.
She rubbed it absently, the
small crescent from that childhood bike crash
suddenly
burning like new. Evan used to trace it too, back when his fingers were gentle. Before they weren't. "I left him," Rory said quietly. The kettle kept heating. Eva gripped the counter edge until her knuckles paled. "Good,"
she finally replied
. "About time." "He found me. In London." Rory's throat closed around the words. "Not at Silas's. Not yet. But he knows the restaurant. Yu-Fei's been getting calls. Hang-ups. Then last night someone left a photo of my bike under the wiper. My old helmet in the shot. The one I wore when we—" "Stop." Eva whirled. Her eyes glittered. "Don't you dare bring that night into this flat like some cheap bargaining chip." The memory flared anyway. Brick Lane had been louder then, music spilling from every doorway.
They'd danced badly in Eva's
tiny living room until Ptolemy knocked over a lamp in protest. Then they'd stopped
dancing
. Rory could still taste the cheap wine on Eva's lips,
feel
the way Eva's hands had shaken when they'd finally reached for each other. Rory took one step closer. The floorboards creaked under her trainers. "I'm not here for that," she lied. Eva's laugh this time held no humour.
She reached up, yanked the
pencil from her hair. Black waves tumbled down, the same straight shoulder-length cut she'd kept since university. It suited her. Always had. "Bullshit." Eva pointed the pencil like a wand. "You don't get to vanish after what we did and then reappear smelling like takeaway and looking like that." "Like what?" "Like you still want me." The words cracked out of her. Eva's cheeks flushed.
She turned away again, busying
herself with mugs that didn't need arranging. "Like I didn't spend six months checking my phone every five minutes wondering if you'd come back." Rory's chest constricted.
She crossed the remaining distance
before her brain caught up, stopping just short of touching. Close enough to see the faint freckles across Eva's nose, the ones that only appeared after too much sun on the Cardiff coast. "I thought you'd be better off without me." The admission tasted like rust. "After Evan. After what he did to my arm that last time. I was poison, Eva. Still am." The kettle shrieked. Eva ignored it. She faced Rory fully now, so near their breaths mingled. Mint toothpaste and the faint trace of the bergamot candle she always burned when she researched. "You don't get to decide that for me." Eva's voice had gone dangerously soft. The dangerous kind that preceded either kissing or screaming. Maybe both. "You ran to London because I begged you to. Then you ran from me because you decided what was best. For both of us. Without asking." Ptolemy jumped down and wove between their legs, tail high. Traitorous animal. Rory lifted her hand. Hesitated.
Then brushed a strand of
hair from Eva's cheek. The touch jolted through her like live wire. Eva didn't pull away.
Her eyes fluttered half-closed, lashes
casting shadows on her pale skin. "I missed you," Rory whispered. "Every delivery run past this street. Every time Silas played that bloody French accordion music upstairs and I remembered how you danced to it. Naked. Laughing." Eva caught her wrist. Not hard.
Just enough to feel the
pulse
there, right over the scar. "Don't." But her thumb stroked the crescent mark, gentle as forgiveness. "You don't get to say those things and expect me to—" "What? Want you again?" Rory leaned in until their foreheads touched. "Too late. I never stopped." The kettle clicked off. Silence rushed in, thick enough to choke on. Eva's free hand rose, fingers hovering near Rory's jaw. Indecision warred across her face. Hurt. Hunger. The same complicated storm that had always lived between them. "You'll break me again," Eva said. The words brushed Rory's mouth. "Probably." Rory closed the last millimetre.
Their lips met like two
magnets that had fought the pull too long. Eva made a small sound, half protest, half relief.
Then her hands were in
Rory's hair, tugging, and the kiss turned fierce. All the unsaid things poured out in the press of tongues, the scrape of teeth. Rory tasted salt. Tears.
Hers or Eva's, she couldn't
tell. They stumbled backwards. A stack of books toppled. Ptolemy yowled and fled under the sofa. Rory's back hit the wall beside the window where rain now pattered against the glass. Eva pressed into her, all soft curves and hard desperation. "Bedroom," Eva gasped against her mouth. "Now." Rory didn't argue.
She hooked her fingers in
Eva's cardigan and walked them there, never breaking contact. The bedroom door banged open. More books. A lamp with a crooked shade. The bed
was unmade
, sheets rumpled from what
looked like a sleepless night
. Research notes covered one pillow. Eva shoved her down. Rory landed on her back, staring up at the woman she'd never quite left. Eva's chest heaved.
Her lips were swollen, eyes
dark. "Clothes off," Eva ordered. The teacher’s daughter had always been good at giving instructions. Rory peeled off her damp jacket. Her delivery polo followed. Eva watched, gaze
tracing
every new mark, every forgotten detail. When Rory reached for her own belt, Eva batted her hands away. "My turn." The words sent heat spiralling low in Rory's belly. Eva's fingers worked the buckle with deliberate slowness, knuckles brushing skin. Each touch
felt like penance and promise
. The belt whispered free. Jeans slid down. Rory kicked them off, along with her trainers. She lay there in plain black knickers,
suddenly
aware of how exposed she was. Not just her body. Everything. Eva stood back. Her own cardigan dropped. The t-shirt beneath followed, revealing a simple black bra. Nothing fancy. Nothing needed to be. Rory drank in the sight of her, the gentle slope of shoulders, the way her ribs expanded with each quick breath. "Still beautiful," Rory murmured. "Flattery later." Eva climbed onto the bed, knees bracketing Rory's hips. "Talking later. Much later." She kissed Rory again, slower this time. Exploratory. Like she
was relearning
territory she'd once known by heart. Rory arched up, hands sliding over Eva's back, finding the clasp of her bra. It fell away. Skin met skin. Warmth. The faint scent of Eva's vanilla lotion mixing with the rain coming through the cracked window. Rory rolled them. Eva let her, a small surprised laugh escaping as her back hit the mattress. The sound undid something in Rory's chest. She kissed down Eva's throat, lingering at the
pulse
point that
fluttered
wildly. Lower. Across collarbones. When she took one nipple into her mouth, Eva's back bowed. "God, Rory—" The name
sounded like prayer and curse all at once
. Rory smiled against her skin and continued her path downward. Eva's fingers tangled in her hair, guiding but not forcing. They had never needed force. Even in their worst fights, the chemistry had burned clean through everything else. Rory hooked her fingers in Eva's leggings. Paused. Looked up. "Yes or no?" Eva's eyes met hers. Something raw passed between them. Forgiveness, maybe. Or the decision to delay it. "Yes." The fabric slid away. Rory kissed the inside of one thigh, then the other. Eva
trembled
. When Rory finally put her mouth where they both needed it, Eva's moan cut through the quiet flat like lightning. Her hips jerked. Rory held her steady, one hand splayed across her
stomach
, feeling the muscles contract with each stroke of her tongue. The taste of her. The sounds she made. The way her fingers tightened almost painfully in Rory's hair. All of it crashed over Rory like a wave she'd been drowning to reach. She lost herself in it. In giving. In the trust Eva still somehow offered after everything. Eva came with a broken cry, thighs clamping around Rory's head. The sound
echoed
off the book-lined walls. Ptolemy thumped against the bedroom door in protest from the other side. Rory rested her cheek against Eva's thigh, catching her breath. Her own body
throbbed
, unmet. She didn't mind. Not yet. Eva tugged at her shoulders. "Up here." Rory crawled up. Eva kissed her, tasting herself on Rory's tongue. The kiss turned hungry again. Hands roamed. Eva pushed Rory onto her back once more and straddled her thigh, grinding down with deliberate rolls of her hips. "Your turn," she panted. Rory gripped Eva's waist, guiding her movements. The friction against her own centre built
quickly
. Too
quickly
. She
was already aching
from the kiss alone, from the months of dreaming about this exact scenario. "Eva—" "I know."
Eva leaned down, hair curtaining them both
. "Let me see you fall apart." The words tipped Rory over. She came hard, hips bucking, Eva's name torn from her throat. Eva followed seconds later, collapsing forward. Their hearts hammered against each other. For long minutes, only the rain and their slowing breaths filled the room. Eva
traced
idle patterns on Rory's ribs. The touch felt dangerously close to
tenderness
. "Stay tonight," Eva whispered. Not quite a question. Not quite a demand. Rory swallowed. The complications hadn't vanished. Evan was still out there. The supernatural mess Lucien had warned her about last week still
loomed
. But Eva's
weight
against her felt like the only right thing in months. She kissed the top of Eva's head. "Try and make me leave." Eva's laugh
vibrated
through both of them. She lifted her head, heterochromatic eyes—no, that was wrong. Rory blinked. Eva's eyes were the same green they'd always been. The thought of another pair of eyes, one amber and one black,
flickered
and died. Wrong place. Wrong time for that particular ghost. Eva's fingers found the scar on Rory's wrist again. This time she brought it to her lips, pressing a kiss directly to the raised tissue. "We talk tomorrow," she said against the skin. "About everything. No running." "Tomorrow," Rory agreed. Her voice cracked. Eva settled back down, ear pressed to Rory's heartbeat like she needed the proof of it. Outside, London kept moving. Sirens wailed in the distance. The curry house sent up new waves of spice. Inside the cramped flat, two women who had
shattered
each other once held the pieces close instead. Rory's eyes drifted shut. For the first time in seventeen months, three days, the knot in her chest
began to
loosen. The bedroom door creaked open. Ptolemy hopped onto the bed, circled twice, then curled into the small space between their bodies. His purring rumble joined the rain. Neither woman moved to push him away. The complications could wait until morning.
created_at
"2026-05-01T12:34:26.246Z"
5/1/2026, 12:34:26 PM
model
"x-ai/grok-4.20-20260309"
app_id
182717
external_user
(null)
streamed
true
cancelled
false
latency
472
moderation_latency
(null)
generation_time
39552
tokens_prompt
4556
tokens_completion
3372
native_tokens_prompt
4114
native_tokens_completion
2804
native_tokens_completion_images
(null)
native_tokens_reasoning
0
native_tokens_cached
4096
num_media_prompt
(null)
num_input_audio_prompt
(null)
num_media_completion
0
num_search_results
(null)
num_fetches
(null)
web_search_engine
(null)
origin
"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byok
false
finish_reason
"stop"
native_finish_reason
"completed"
usage
0.0078517
router
(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id
"3ecee37f-b217-4093-87fb-aaf0afe307af"
id
"621cfbf6-ac6a-9e47-9890-db040c1c01cf"
is_byok
false
latency
70
model_permaslug
"x-ai/grok-4.20-20260309"
provider_name
"xAI"
status
200
user_agent
"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.1; linux; x64))"
http_referer
(null)
request_id
"req-1777638866-GW2TRSylz0mhSKKCqLFD"
session_id
(null)
api_type
"completions"
id
"gen-1777638866-JXB9F4ByzbkLiohono9p"
upstream_id
"621cfbf6-ac6a-9e47-9890-db040c1c01cf"
total_cost
0.0078517
cache_discount
0.0043008
upstream_inference_cost
0
provider_name
"xAI"
response_cache_source_id
(null)
Evaluation details
Result
Evaluator
Details
Meta Data
92.86%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags
26
adverbTagCount
3
adverbTags
0
"Rory said quietly [quietly]"
1
"Rory's throat closed around [around]"
2
"The admission tasted like [like]"
dialogueSentences
56
tagDensity
0.464
leniency
0.929
rawRatio
0.115
effectiveRatio
0.107
90.77%
AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount
2167
totalAiIsmAdverbs
4
found
0
adverb
"suddenly"
count
2
1
adverb
"quickly"
count
2
highlights
0
"suddenly"
1
"quickly"
80.00%
AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
0
"Patel"
100.00%
AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
46.93%
AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount
2167
totalAiIsms
23
found
0
word
"familiar"
count
1
1
word
"weight"
count
2
2
word
"flicked"
count
1
3
word
"tracing"
count
2
4
word
"dancing"
count
1
5
word
"fluttered"
count
2
6
word
"pulse"
count
2
7
word
"silence"
count
1
8
word
"warmth"
count
1
9
word
"trembled"
count
1
10
word
"stomach"
count
1
11
word
"echoed"
count
1
12
word
"throbbed"
count
1
13
word
"traced"
count
1
14
word
"tenderness"
count
1
15
word
"loomed"
count
1
16
word
"vibrated"
count
1
17
word
"flickered"
count
1
18
word
"shattered"
count
1
highlights
0
"familiar"
1
"weight"
2
"flicked"
3
"tracing"
4
"dancing"
5
"fluttered"
6
"pulse"
7
"silence"
8
"warmth"
9
"trembled"
10
"stomach"
11
"echoed"
12
"throbbed"
13
"traced"
14
"tenderness"
15
"loomed"
16
"vibrated"
17
"flickered"
18
"shattered"
100.00%
Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches
1
maxInWindow
1
found
0
label
"eyes widened/narrowed"
count
1
highlights
0
"eyes widened"
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells
0
narrationSentences
247
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount
1
hedgeCount
2
narrationSentences
247
filterMatches
0
"feel"
hedgeMatches
0
"began to"
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences
276
gibberishSentences
0
adjustedGibberishSentences
0
longSentenceCount
0
runOnParagraphCount
0
giantParagraphCount
0
wordSaladCount
0
repetitionLoopCount
0
controlTokenCount
0
repeatedSegmentCount
0
maxSentenceWordsSeen
42
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans
0
markdownWords
0
totalWords
2166
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions
19
unquotedAttributions
0
matches
(empty)
0.00%
Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions
136
wordCount
1838
uniqueNames
10
maxNameDensity
3.59
worstName
"Eva"
maxWindowNameDensity
6
worstWindowName
"Eva"
discoveredNames
Eva
66
Rory
57
Flat
1
Golden
1
Empress
1
Lane
1
Ptolemy
6
Cardiff
1
Lucien
1
London
1
persons
0
"Eva"
1
"Rory"
2
"Flat"
3
"Ptolemy"
4
"Lucien"
places
0
"Lane"
1
"Cardiff"
2
"London"
globalScore
0
windowScore
0
18.42%
Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences
133
glossingSentenceCount
7
matches
0
"appeared, pale under the hallway light, hair twisted up with a pencil"
1
"something between shock and the old familiar fi"
2
"not quite a smile"
3
"looked like a sleepless night"
4
"felt like penance and promise"
5
"sounded like prayer and curse all at once"
6
"felt like the only right thing in month"
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches
0
per1kWords
0
wordCount
2166
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount
0
totalSentences
276
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs
88
mean
24.61
std
17.69
cv
0.719
sampleLengths
0
44
1
34
2
1
3
20
4
25
5
53
6
40
7
18
8
4
9
11
10
57
11
4
12
40
13
12
14
15
15
11
16
37
17
6
18
13
19
6
20
51
21
20
22
59
23
11
24
7
25
34
26
27
27
2
28
43
29
41
30
31
31
32
32
51
33
12
34
37
35
31
36
17
37
22
38
16
39
38
40
11
41
6
42
60
43
40
44
7
45
48
46
27
47
14
48
32
49
2
100.00%
Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount
1
totalSentences
247
matches
0
"was unmade"
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount
2
totalVerbs
352
matches
0
"was relearning"
1
"was already aching"
100.00%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount
1
semicolonCount
0
flaggedSentences
1
totalSentences
276
ratio
0.004
matches
0
"She lifted her head, heterochromatic eyes—no, that was wrong."
92.27%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount
1843
adjectiveStacks
0
stackExamples
(empty)
adverbCount
90
adverbRatio
0.048833423765599564
lyAdverbCount
21
lyAdverbRatio
0.011394465545306565
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences
276
echoCount
0
echoWords
(empty)
100.00%
Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences
276
mean
7.85
std
5.76
cv
0.733
sampleLengths
0
17
1
4
2
18
3
5
4
3
5
14
6
17
7
1
8
8
9
12
10
17
11
8
12
3
13
21
14
20
15
7
16
2
17
10
18
25
19
5
20
5
21
1
22
1
23
11
24
4
25
2
26
7
27
2
28
14
29
11
30
20
31
4
32
8
33
4
34
7
35
12
36
6
37
15
38
10
39
2
40
7
41
4
42
4
43
7
44
4
45
6
46
16
47
12
48
3
49
6
56.40%
Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats
11
diversityRatio
0.36231884057971014
totalSentences
276
uniqueOpeners
100
64.72%
Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount
4
totalSentences
206
matches
0
"Then they'd stopped dancing."
1
"Then brushed a strand of"
2
"Just enough to feel the"
3
"Then her hands were in"
ratio
0.019
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount
38
totalSentences
206
matches
0
"She rapped twice instead."
1
"Her eyes widened, the green"
2
"She'd come straight from her"
3
"She pushed off the door"
4
"She rubbed it absently, the"
5
"she finally replied"
6
"Her eyes glittered."
7
"They'd danced badly in Eva's"
8
"She reached up, yanked the"
9
"It suited her."
10
"She turned away again, busying"
11
"She crossed the remaining distance"
12
"She faced Rory fully now,"
13
"Her eyes fluttered half-closed, lashes"
14
"Their lips met like two"
15
"Hers or Eva's, she couldn't"
16
"They stumbled backwards."
17
"She hooked her fingers in"
18
"Her lips were swollen, eyes"
19
"Her delivery polo followed."
ratio
0.184
32.82%
Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount
176
totalSentences
206
matches
0
"Rory's knuckles hovered an inch"
1
"She rapped twice instead."
2
"The deadbolts on Eva's door"
3
"The last one slid free."
4
"The door cracked."
5
"Eva's face appeared, pale under"
6
"Her eyes widened, the green"
7
"The single word carried weight,"
8
"Rory swallowed, tasting the curry"
9
"Eva said, but she stepped"
10
"Rory slipped inside."
11
"The flat swallowed her immediately,"
12
"Ptolemy lifted his head from"
13
"The tabby had never liked"
14
"Eva shut the door and"
15
"The thin grey cardigan she"
16
"Heat crawled up Rory's neck."
17
"The barrister's daughter in her"
18
"Eva's mouth twitched, not quite"
19
"Rory set her delivery bag"
ratio
0.854
48.54%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount
2
totalSentences
206
matches
0
"Before they weren't."
1
"Even in their worst fights,"
ratio
0.01
100.00%
Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences
74
technicalSentenceCount
3
matches
0
"Rory arched up, hands sliding over Eva's back, finding the clasp of her bra."
1
"Eva's fingers tangled in her hair, guiding but not forcing."
2
"Inside the cramped flat, two women who had shattered each other once held the pieces close instead."
86.54%
Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags
26
uselessAdditionCount
2
matches
0
"Eva climbed, knees bracketing Rory's hips"
1
"Eva leaned down, hair curtaining them both"
7.14%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags
13
fancyCount
8
fancyTags
0
"she lied (lie)"
1
"Rory whispered (whisper)"
2
"Eva gasped (gasp)"
3
"Eva ordered (order)"
4
"Rory murmured (murmur)"
5
"she panted (pant)"
6
"Eva whispered (whisper)"
7
"Rory agreed (agree)"
dialogueSentences
56
tagDensity
0.232
leniency
0.464
rawRatio
0.615
effectiveRatio
0.286
80.5806%