Run: 2026-07-25-01KYD6C80GD12NK644TZDH0WPV

Run Details

Duration:
17.4s
Cost:
$0.000400
Provider:
Poolside

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The air changed the moment they stepped through the gap between the standing stones. Aurora felt it first — a pressure against her skin, like diving underwater, though the sky above remained the same London gray. Her fingers tightened around the crimson pendant at her chest, its faint warmth blooming against her sternum. "Well," Nyx said, their voice a breath of wind through autumn leaves, "that's new." Isolde moved ahead, bare feet brushing the earth without leaving marks. Wildflowers bloomed in her wake — silver petals, midnight blue blossoms, things that had no name in any mortal garden. The air grew sweeter, thick with the scent of night-blooming jasmine and something else, something sharp and green like crushed mint and lightning. "This place," Isolde murmured, her voice carrying that particular cadence that made sentences sound like half-remembered dreams, "is not where you began, child of two worlds." Aurora glanced around. The trees here were wrongnot quite trees, more like pillars of living wood twisted into impossible spirals, their bark shimmering with flecks of gold that moved when she wasn't looking directly at them. The ground beneath her boots felt spongy, as though she were walking on moss-covered cushions stretched over something vast and sleeping. "How long have we been walking?" she asked, though she already knew the answer. Time had been slipping since they'd crossed the boundary. Minutes? Hours? Days? "Time," Isolde replied, "is a river that forgets its own course here." Nyx drifted slightly ahead, their shadow-form rippling like smoke caught in an unfelt breeze. They paused at the base of one of the spiraling trees, reaching out a hand that passed through the trunk as if it were mist. "The Veil is thin here," they whispered, and Aurora could see the faint shimmer in the air — not quite visible, more felt than seen, like heat rising off pavement in summer. "I can sense the other side. Hel, the Fae Courts, the spaces between breaths." Aurora touched the pendant again. It pulsed once, a gentle thrum against her skin, and she swear she heard something in response — a sound like distant bells, or maybe the echo of a heartbeat from somewhere very far away. They rounded a bend in the path — if it could be called a path. The ground had opened into a clearing, and Aurora stopped dead. Above them, the sky was no longer gray. It swirled with colors she couldn't name — purples that burned like fire, blues that shimmered like oil on water, golds that shifted and flowed like liquid metal. Constellations spun lazily overhead, some familiar, others that made her eyes ache if she stared too long. "Isolde," she breathed. "What is this place?" "Your birthright," the seer said simply. "Or perhaps your destination." Nyx floated closer, their form solidifying enough to cast an actual shadow on the glowing grass. "The Fae Grove," they said. "Hidden in Richmond Park, but not of it. A pocket between worlds." Aurora's hand moved instinctively to her wrist, where the small crescent-shaped scar from childhood throbbed with a heat that had nothing to do with the ambient magic crackling in the air. She'd had that scar since she was seven, when she'd fallen from the old oak tree in her grandmother's garden and somehow landed wrong, her wrist bending at an angle that shouldn't have been possible. The doctors had been baffled. The healers, too. Only the old woman who lived in the cottage at the edge of town had shaken her head and muttered something about "thin blood" and "doors that shouldn't be opened." "Look," Isolde said, pointing. In the center of the clearing stood a pool of water — but it wasn't water. It moved like liquid mercury, reflecting not their faces but scenes from other places: a vineyard under an amber sky where robed figures danced around tables piled high with food; a court of twisted thrones where pale figures with too many eyes watched with hungry interest; a library that stretched into infinity, its books floating gently in the air. Aurora stepped closer, mesmerized. The surface rippled as she approached, and for a moment she thought she saw her own reflection staring back — but older, with eyes that held the same violet glow as Nyx's, and hair that flowed like liquid shadow. "That's Dymas," Nyx said, their voice tight with something like recognition. "I can feel it. The Prince's realm." "The Heartstone knows," Isolde added. "It sings to the places it calls home." Aurora pulled the pendant free, holding it up to the light. The deep crimson gem caught and reflected the impossible colors of the sky, and for a moment she could swear she heard voices — whispers in a language that predated words, speaking of hunger and feast, of excess and emptiness, of a banquet table set for someone who had not yet arrived. "Who gave you this?" she asked Isolde. "Someone who knew you would need it," the seer replied. "Someone who walks the spaces between." Behind them, Nyx was examining the standing stones that marked the boundary. Each one pulsed with its own inner light, runes carved deep into the ancient wood that seemed to shift and reform as Aurora watched. "They're watching us," Nyx said. "The Wardens. Or what's left of them." Aurora turned back to the pool. The reflections were changing now, showing new scenes: a kitchen where a young woman with black hair and bright blue eyes laughed as she tossed ingredients into a wok; a bar where a man with kind eyes and tired smile poured drinks for ghosts; a flat where books lined every wall and the smell of jasmine tea lingered in the air. "Those are my memories," she whispered. "But they're not mine anymore." "They never were," Isolde said gently. "Not entirely." The ground trembled beneath them, a low vibration that made the pool's surface churn. From the edges of the clearing, shapes began to emerge — not quite solid, more like suggestions of movement, figures that existed in the corner of vision and vanished when looked at directly. Aurora's hand went to the Fae-forged blade at her belt, its familiar cold weight a comfort against her hip. Isolde's gift, given freely despite the compulsion that bound her to truth. It would cut through wards, protect against demons, but what use was it against... this? "This isn't just a grove," Nyx said, their form flickering between solid and shadow. "It's a crossroads. A meeting place for things that shouldn't meet." "And we're the meeting," Isolde said. "The convergence point." Aurora looked at each of them in turn — Nyx, the eternal shade who had walked the earth for centuries; Isolde, the exiled seer whose visions spanned lifetimes; and herself, caught between worlds, marked by magic she didn't understand, carrying artifacts from realms she'd never seen. The pendant grew warm again, then hot, burning against her skin as the colors in the sky deepened and swirled faster. The pool began to bubble, and from its depths rose a figure — tall, robed in robes that seemed woven from the same impossible colors as the sky, with eyes like burning coals. "Welcome, Heartbearer," the figure called out, its voice echoing across the clearing like thunder wrapped in silk. "We have been expecting you." Aurora's knees nearly gave out, but Nyx was there in an instant, their solid form steadying her. Isolde placed a cool hand on her shoulder, and Aurora could feel the seer's magic flowing through her, a gentle current that steadied her racing heart. "Remember," Isolde whispered, "the truth is not always what it seems, and the path forward is not always the one you expect." The figure raised a hand, and the pool stilled. The reflections faded, leaving only their own faces staring back at them — but changed somehow. Older. Wiser. Marked by something they couldn't yet name. "Your journey begins here," the figure said, and then was gone, leaving only the lingering scent of jasmine and the echo of words that would haunt them all. Aurora looked down at the pendant, now cool against her chest, and knew that whatever lay ahead, she would face it with these two at her side. The grove had claimed them, marked them as its own, and somewhere in the distance, under an amber sky, a feast was being prepared for their arrival.
created_at"2026-07-25T17:50:11.99Z" 7/25/2026, 5:50:11 PM
model"poolside/laguna-s-2.1-20260720"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency174
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time17171
tokens_prompt1547
tokens_completion2098
native_tokens_prompt1654
native_tokens_completion1905
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached1632
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
service_tier(null)
usage0.00039952
router(null)
provider_responses
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endpoint_id"ab7f9e97-1af5-4b81-b099-cc932f54234e"
id"chatcmpl-2bb87f444fc74345ad93919abf2cfcdf"
is_byokfalse
latency174
model_permaslug"poolside/laguna-s-2.1-20260720"
provider_name"Poolside"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.18.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1785001812-Fso26JSmjLdFsSWFnCFI"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
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upstream_id"chatcmpl-2bb87f444fc74345ad93919abf2cfcdf"
total_cost0.00039952
cache_discount0.00014688
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Poolside"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags22
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"the seer said simply [simply]"
1"Isolde said gently [gently]"
dialogueSentences35
tagDensity0.629
leniency1
rawRatio0.091
effectiveRatio0.091
82.03% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1391
totalAiIsmAdverbs5
found
0
adverb"slightly"
count1
1
adverb"very"
count1
2
adverb"lazily"
count1
3
adverb"gently"
count2
highlights
0"slightly"
1"very"
2"lazily"
3"gently"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
38.89% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1391
totalAiIsms17
found
0
word"warmth"
count1
1
word"pulsed"
count2
2
word"echo"
count2
3
word"shimmered"
count1
4
word"familiar"
count2
5
word"throbbed"
count1
6
word"trembled"
count1
7
word"churn"
count1
8
word"weight"
count1
9
word"depths"
count1
10
word"echoing"
count1
11
word"silk"
count1
12
word"could feel"
count1
13
word"racing"
count1
highlights
0"warmth"
1"pulsed"
2"echo"
3"shimmered"
4"familiar"
5"throbbed"
6"trembled"
7"churn"
8"weight"
9"depths"
10"echoing"
11"silk"
12"could feel"
13"racing"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences77
matches(empty)
87.20% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount3
narrationSentences77
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"began to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences90
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen61
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1405
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions20
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
83.33% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions40
wordCount1207
uniqueNames6
maxNameDensity1.24
worstName"Aurora"
maxWindowNameDensity2.5
worstWindowName"Isolde"
discoveredNames
London1
Isolde12
Aurora15
Time1
Nyx10
Fae-forged1
persons
0"Isolde"
1"Aurora"
2"Time"
3"Nyx"
places
0"London"
1"Fae-forged"
globalScore0.879
windowScore0.833
0.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences53
glossingSentenceCount6
matches
0"not quite trees, more like pillars of living wood twisted into impossible spirals, their bark shimmering with flecks of gold that moved when she wasn't looking directly at them"
1"not quite visible, more felt than seen, like heat rising off pavement in summer"
2"something like recognition"
3"wood that seemed to shift and reform as Aurora watched"
4"not quite solid, more like suggestions of movement, figures that existed in the corner of vision and vanished when looked at directly"
5"seemed woven from the same impossible colors as the sky, with eyes like burning coals"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.712
wordCount1405
matches
0"not their faces but scenes from other places: a vineyard under an amber sky"
92.59% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount2
totalSentences90
matches
0"had that scar"
1"knew that whatever"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs41
mean34.27
std21.88
cv0.639
sampleLengths
053
114
254
326
459
526
612
739
846
940
1026
1153
127
1310
1433
15104
164
1775
1843
1918
2013
2163
227
2316
2436
2512
2667
2711
288
2947
3046
3125
329
3346
3454
3522
3643
3722
3834
3928
4054
91.59% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount3
totalSentences77
matches
0"been baffled"
1"was gone"
2"being prepared"
71.79% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs208
matches
0"wasn't looking"
1"were walking"
2"was examining"
3"were changing"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount14
semicolonCount6
flaggedSentences16
totalSentences90
ratio0.178
matches
0"Aurora felt it first — a pressure against her skin, like diving underwater, though the sky above remained the same London gray."
1"Wildflowers bloomed in her wake — silver petals, midnight blue blossoms, things that had no name in any mortal garden."
2"The trees here were wrong — not quite trees, more like pillars of living wood twisted into impossible spirals, their bark shimmering with flecks of gold that moved when she wasn't looking directly at them."
3"\"The Veil is thin here,\" they whispered, and Aurora could see the faint shimmer in the air — not quite visible, more felt than seen, like heat rising off pavement in summer."
4"It pulsed once, a gentle thrum against her skin, and she swear she heard something in response — a sound like distant bells, or maybe the echo of a heartbeat from somewhere very far away."
5"They rounded a bend in the path — if it could be called a path."
6"It swirled with colors she couldn't name — purples that burned like fire, blues that shimmered like oil on water, golds that shifted and flowed like liquid metal."
7"In the center of the clearing stood a pool of water — but it wasn't water."
8"It moved like liquid mercury, reflecting not their faces but scenes from other places: a vineyard under an amber sky where robed figures danced around tables piled high with food; a court of twisted thrones where pale figures with too many eyes watched with hungry interest; a library that stretched into infinity, its books floating gently in the air."
9"The surface rippled as she approached, and for a moment she thought she saw her own reflection staring back — but older, with eyes that held the same violet glow as Nyx's, and hair that flowed like liquid shadow."
10"The deep crimson gem caught and reflected the impossible colors of the sky, and for a moment she could swear she heard voices — whispers in a language that predated words, speaking of hunger and feast, of excess and emptiness, of a banquet table set for someone who had not yet arrived."
11"The reflections were changing now, showing new scenes: a kitchen where a young woman with black hair and bright blue eyes laughed as she tossed ingredients into a wok; a bar where a man with kind eyes and tired smile poured drinks for ghosts; a flat where books lined every wall and the smell of jasmine tea lingered in the air."
12"From the edges of the clearing, shapes began to emerge — not quite solid, more like suggestions of movement, figures that existed in the corner of vision and vanished when looked at directly."
13"Aurora looked at each of them in turn — Nyx, the eternal shade who had walked the earth for centuries; Isolde, the exiled seer whose visions spanned lifetimes; and herself, caught between worlds, marked by magic she didn't understand, carrying artifacts from realms she'd never seen."
14"The pool began to bubble, and from its depths rose a figure — tall, robed in robes that seemed woven from the same impossible colors as the sky, with eyes like burning coals."
15"The reflections faded, leaving only their own faces staring back at them — but changed somehow."
91.05% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1199
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"small crescent-shaped scar"
adverbCount52
adverbRatio0.043369474562135114
lyAdverbCount13
lyAdverbRatio0.010842368640533779
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences90
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences90
mean15.61
std12.93
cv0.828
sampleLengths
014
122
217
314
411
520
623
726
83
935
1021
1114
129
131
141
151
1612
1714
1825
1932
2014
215
2235
2315
2411
258
2628
2717
283
294
306
314
3216
335
3412
3531
3635
375
383
3930
404
4116
4259
434
4439
4511
467
475
488
4911
71.11% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats6
diversityRatio0.4666666666666667
totalSentences90
uniqueOpeners42
52.91% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount1
totalSentences63
matches
0"Only the old woman who"
ratio0.016
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount11
totalSentences63
matches
0"Her fingers tightened around the"
1"she asked, though she already"
2"They paused at the base"
3"they whispered, and Aurora could"
4"It pulsed once, a gentle"
5"They rounded a bend in"
6"It swirled with colors she"
7"She'd had that scar since"
8"It moved like liquid mercury,"
9"she asked Isolde"
10"It would cut through wards,"
ratio0.175
7.62% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount57
totalSentences63
matches
0"The air changed the moment"
1"Aurora felt it first —"
2"Her fingers tightened around the"
3"Nyx said, their voice a"
4"Isolde moved ahead, bare feet"
5"Wildflowers bloomed in her wake"
6"The air grew sweeter, thick"
7"Isolde murmured, her voice carrying"
8"Aurora glanced around."
9"The trees here were wrong"
10"The ground beneath her boots"
11"she asked, though she already"
12"Time had been slipping since"
13"Nyx drifted slightly ahead, their"
14"They paused at the base"
15"they whispered, and Aurora could"
16"Aurora touched the pendant again."
17"It pulsed once, a gentle"
18"They rounded a bend in"
19"The ground had opened into"
ratio0.905
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences63
matches(empty)
ratio0
0.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences39
technicalSentenceCount13
matches
0"Wildflowers bloomed in her wake — silver petals, midnight blue blossoms, things that had no name in any mortal garden."
1"The trees here were wrong — not quite trees, more like pillars of living wood twisted into impossible spirals, their bark shimmering with flecks of gold that mo…"
2"The ground beneath her boots felt spongy, as though she were walking on moss-covered cushions stretched over something vast and sleeping."
3"Aurora's hand moved instinctively to her wrist, where the small crescent-shaped scar from childhood throbbed with a heat that had nothing to do with the ambient…"
4"She'd had that scar since she was seven, when she'd fallen from the old oak tree in her grandmother's garden and somehow landed wrong, her wrist bending at an a…"
5"It moved like liquid mercury, reflecting not their faces but scenes from other places: a vineyard under an amber sky where robed figures danced around tables pi…"
6"The surface rippled as she approached, and for a moment she thought she saw her own reflection staring back — but older, with eyes that held the same violet glo…"
7"The deep crimson gem caught and reflected the impossible colors of the sky, and for a moment she could swear she heard voices — whispers in a language that pred…"
8"Each one pulsed with its own inner light, runes carved deep into the ancient wood that seemed to shift and reform as Aurora watched."
9"The ground trembled beneath them, a low vibration that made the pool's surface churn."
10"From the edges of the clearing, shapes began to emerge — not quite solid, more like suggestions of movement, figures that existed in the corner of vision and va…"
11"Aurora looked at each of them in turn — Nyx, the eternal shade who had walked the earth for centuries; Isolde, the exiled seer whose visions spanned lifetimes; …"
12"The pool began to bubble, and from its depths rose a figure — tall, robed in robes that seemed woven from the same impossible colors as the sky, with eyes like …"
56.82% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags22
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"Nyx said, their voice a breath of wind through autumn leaves,"
1"Nyx said, their voice tight with something like recognition"
2"Nyx said, their form flickering between solid and shadow"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags21
fancyCount7
fancyTags
0"Isolde murmured (murmur)"
1"they whispered (whisper)"
2"she breathed (breathe)"
3"Isolde added (add)"
4"she whispered (whisper)"
5"the figure called out (call out)"
6"Isolde whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences35
tagDensity0.6
leniency1
rawRatio0.333
effectiveRatio0.333
70.8981%