Run: 2026-09-02-01M1GQ93GR09PN7J779B6KDZWD

Run Details

Duration:
3m 14s
Cost:
$0.056693
Provider:
Z.AI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4418" name="Nyx" aliases="Nyx, the Shadow, Nightwhisper" pronouns="they/them" species="Shade" storyRole="Wild Card"> <eyeColor>faintly glowing violet</eyeColor> <height>approximately 6'2" in solid form</height> <age>ageless</age> <form>humanoid silhouette of living shadow, can shift between solid and incorporeal</form> <voice>sounds like a whisper carried on the wind</voice> <description>A being of living shadow, existing between the mortal plane and the spaces between realms.</description> <backstory>Nyx was once a human sorcerer named Aldric who became trapped between realms during a failed summoning ritual in 1643. They now exist as a Shade, bound to the mortal plane but able to slip between shadows.</backstory> </character> <character id="4424" name="Isolde Varga" aliases="Isolde, the Seer" pronouns="she/her" species="Half-Fae" storyRole="Oracle"> <eyeColor>pale lavender</eyeColor> <hair>silver, reaching her waist</hair> <height>5'5"</height> <age>300 years old</age> <appearance>ethereal, ageless</appearance> <speech>speaks in riddles</speech> <footprints>leaves no footprints when she walks</footprints> <compulsion>cannot lie (Fae compulsion) but can mislead</compulsion> <description>A Half-Fae seer exiled from the Fae Courts for sharing visions with mortals.</description> <backstory>She now lives in a hidden grove in Richmond Park, offering cryptic prophecies to those who seek her out.</backstory> </character> <location id="853" name="Dymas (Gluttony)" aliases="Dymas, gluttony, Dymasian" realm="Hel" sin="Gluttony"> <ruler>Prince Belphegor</ruler> <skyColor>warm amber</skyColor> <description>A place of excess and indulgence. Sprawling vineyards, orchards, and gardens provide exotic ingredients for master chefs — often helbound souls contracted from Earth. Grand feasts and culinary competitions are common.</description> </location> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> <item id="2006" name="Fae-Forged Blade" aliases="the Fae blade, Isolde's gift" type="Weapon" origin="The Fae Courts"> <material>moonsilver</material> <shape>slender, leaf-shaped dagger</shape> <temperature>always cold to the touch</temperature> <glow>faintly luminescent in moonlight</glow> <power>can cut through magical wards; particularly effective against demons</power> <givenTo>given to Aurora by Isolde as a gift</givenTo> <description>A weapon of the Fae Courts, rare and highly coveted.</description> </item> <lore id="7001" name="The Veil" aliases="the Veil, the Barrier, the Boundary" category="Cosmology"> <solsticeEffect>weakens during the winter solstice, strengthens during the summer solstice</solsticeEffect> <appearance>faint shimmering distortion visible only to those with supernatural sight</appearance> <monitoring>rift points (tears in the Veil) are monitored by the Wardens</monitoring> <description>The Veil is the metaphysical barrier separating Earth from Hel and the Fae Realms.</description> </lore> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the fantasy genre. A small group enters an ancient, otherworldly place for the first time. The environment is alien and wondrous. Describe their exploration — what they see, hear, and feel as they move deeper. Include moments of discovery, unease, and wonder. Let the world-building emerge through the characters' experience rather than exposition. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters, setting, and lore. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Frost had turned Richmond Park into a country of glass. The bracken crunched under Rory's boots like broken shells, and the cold went through her coat with the patience of something that had been waiting for her all day. Nyx moved ahead of her — or above her, which was closer to the truth — a length of darker dark poured between the oaks, showing themselves only when they chose to. Tonight they chose. Tonight, they had said, the year reached its longest night, and the Veil forgot to be a wall. "Here," Nyx whispered, and the wind seemed to carry the word to her from three directions at once. Rory stopped. "Here is a clump of trees." "Look again." She looked, and the clump resolved. Seven stones stood in the bracken where no stones had been a moment before, each taller than she was, each one an oak that had forgotten how to be wood. She could still see the bark in them — the grain, the knots, the fossil ghost of an acorn cap — pressed into grey rock as though the tree had been dipped in stone while it slept. Frost silvered their shoulders. When she laid her palm against the nearest, it was warm. Warm as a flank. Warm as a held hand. She took her hand back and, out of old habit, clocked the exits. There was one: the gap between two split stones. Nothing about it looked like a door. "Wardens walk the park tonight," Nyx said, thin as pipe smoke. "They watch the thin places. Stay close to the stones." "You told me the Veil thins everywhere at solstice." "Which is why the grove will open," Nyx said, "and why we should not be seen opening it." Between the split stones the air was wrong in a way she couldn't name — heat-haze in December, a shimmer she felt in her teeth more than saw. Nyx regarded it the way a person regards a lit window on a cold street. "You won't see it properly," they said. "You'll feel it. Go." She went. Crossing was like wading into a river of static. Pressure crawled up her ears, her jaw ached, and for one heartbeat the world tasted of pennies and honey. Then her next step landed in grass, and winter was gone. The cold fell off her like a coat she'd shrugged loose. Warmth folded in around her — June warmth, hay-in-the-barn warmth — and light came from everywhere and nowhere, gold as honey left out in the sun, though there was no sun, only a pale amber sky with no clouds in it and no birds and no edges she could find. Foxgloves stood in the grass though it was the twenty-first of December. Michaelmas daisies. Bluebells, commas of blue in the green. And things she had no names for: flowers like paper lanterns, flowers like small masked faces, a vine climbing a stone with blossoms that opened as she watched. The meadow ran farther than the park did, all the way to a treeline of oak and silver birch that shimmered like a held breath. The air smelled of honey, cut grass, rain on hot stone, and something green and bruised, like snapped mint. "Right," Rory said quietly, just to hear a human voice. Somewhere a stream ran. Somewhere chimes sounded, though nothing moved to strike them. Blackbirds sang from the treeline with their particular self-important sweetness, and when she turned her head, the song stayed exactly where it was — as if it lived in the air and not in a throat. Her phone had signal nowhere and sense nowhere either: the clock read 00:00, then 33:33, then nothing at all, though the battery swore it was full. Nyx came through behind her and got smaller. It happened slowly enough to watch — their edges fraying like cloth held to a flame, their violet eyes guttering down to embers, the honeyed light pressing on them like a thumb on a bruise. The Shade poured themselves along the ground and slid into the long shadow Rory cast across the flowers, and their voice came up from behind her heel, smaller than before. "The light here is unfriendly to me." "I noticed you melting." "I am not melting. I am being polite." A pause, a whisper like wind through a keyhole. "The shadows in this place are not empty, Rory. They are occupied. I would rather borrow yours." She looked down at the shadow wearing her shape and decided not to ask. Instead she checked the pendant — habit by now — and her stomach dropped. The Heartstone had been warm since the day it found her, warm like a coin held in a fist, pulsing slow and faint whenever one of Hel's doors came near. Now it was cold. River-stone cold. She dug it out from under her scarf and held it up, the deep crimson gem dark as a wine stain, its inner light gone out entirely. "It's dead," she said. "It's resting," said the shadow at her heel. "How would you know?" "I know places between. I was made in one." The whisper frayed. "Or unmade. The word never settled." They went deeper, because that was the whole errant, foolish point of the night — Nyx reading the shadows, Rory reading the ground. The grass gave underfoot like carpet and took her bootprints in silver dew. The flowers turned as she passed, the way sunflowers turn to the sun, except she was the sun, and it took effort not to walk with her shoulders up around her ears. In the next clearing a stag stood waiting. A Richmond red stag, heavy-shouldered, its breath not steaming in the warm air — and its antlers were in bud. Actual buds, actual white blossoms, opening and closing slowly along the tines like gills. It regarded her with eyes like wet pebbles, neither afraid nor interested, then walked away through deep grass and left no trail at all, though her own prints showed for thirty feet behind her. "Okay," Rory said. "Okay." "Wonder looks a great deal like alarm," Nyx observed, "from inside." They were a hundred paces on, following the sound of the stream, when she heard the third set of footsteps. Soft. Bare. Matching their pace exactly, one step behind her own. She stopped; they stopped. She started; they started. Her hand went to her left wrist and found the little crescent scar there, the way it always did when her body knew something before she did. "Isolde," said the shadow at her heel, unbothered. "She has no weight. She never has." Rory turned around. The woman had simply arrived — no transition, no walking, just the difference between one blink and the next. Silver hair fell to her waist; pale lavender eyes sat in a face that could have been twenty or two hundred. She was barefoot, dressed in the grey-green of lichen, and she was smiling the way people smile at arrivals that were scheduled long ago. "You came the long way round," Isolde said. "Most people arrive here by leaving." Rory looked down. Her own prints tracked back toward the stones, silver on green. Where the woman stood, the grass was unbroken, unwritten, like a page no one had touched. "You leave no footprints." "I never learned how," Isolde said, "and by the time it mattered, there was nowhere I wished to be followed." Her gaze dropped to the pendant in Rory's fist. "Ask. You've carried the question for weeks. It's heavier than the stone." "It's gone cold. In the city it's warm — always, faintly. It pulls when Hel's doors are near. Here it's just a rock." "It is fasting." Isolde tilted her head. "It was made in a hungry country, little courier, and it feeds on the thing it was made to find. Here there is nothing for it to eat. Count that a mercy, and count the days of it." "What hungry country?" "The Courts threw me out for giving mortals true things," Isolde said, "so here is a true thing. I followed that stone backward once, the way one follows a river to its spring. I walked under amber skies, past vineyards heavy as sleeping snakes, to a table a mile long where a prince eats and eats and is never full. There was a hand at that table with too many rings on it, and that hand set your stone in silver and sent it to you. Belphegor's table sets no place by accident. Gifts from the hungry are hooks, Aurora Carter. Ask what it is fishing for." "Everyone keeps telling me to throw it away." "And you keep not doing it." Her smile deepened, without comfort. "Good. A thrown hook still catches." She turned toward the stream, and Rory never caught her mid-step, only ever arrived. At a lone hawthorn, Isolde reached into the hollow of the trunk as easily as into a pocket and drew out a long bundle of white cloth. "From the Courts," she said, "which do not part with such things — which is precisely why I did." She unwrapped it. The dagger was slender and leaf-shaped, its metal pale and faintly luminous, like moonlight that had decided to hold a shape. Even at arm's length, Rory could feel the cold coming off it — a clean, deliberate cold, nothing like the pendant's dark chill. Isolde held it out across both palms. "Moonsilver. It is rude to wards and worse to demons. It will cut what should not be cut, including, if you are careless, what you did not mean to cut. Ask permission of everything in this grove. The blade is the one thing here that asks permission of nothing." When Rory reached for it, the shadow at her heel pulled tight and retreated three feet across the flowers. "Sorry," Rory said to the ground. "It's all right," Nyx whispered from very far away. "Only — don't point it at the evening." Isolde laughed, a sound like water going over stones, and closed Rory's fingers around the hilt with cool, light hands. It sat in her grip like nothing she'd ever carried — and she'd carried boxes, crates, a knife once or twice in a bad year — as if it had been waiting to be picked up since before she was born. "Why give this to me? You don't know me." "I don't," Isolde agreed. "I only know what the longest night will open, and who will be standing in front of it wearing a hungry stone. Doors notice stones. Some of the things behind the doors have long memories and short manners." Then her head lifted, her gaze going past them at nothing. "Go now, before the gold goes green. An hour in the grove is an hour, until it isn't. You have already been one hour. Or three. The door won't remember which, and neither will you." "Will we find this place again?" "You found it once," Isolde said, which was not an answer, and was somehow still yes. The way back was shorter, or the grove was through with them. Crossing out was the static river in reverse, pennies and honey, and then December hit her like a slap of open water — frost, cold, her breath in small ghosts. The moon hung exactly where they had left it, same height, same smug attitude. Her phone shuddered awake and told her eleven minutes had passed since the mast lost her. Eleven minutes. Her boots were still dark with dew from a June that existed nowhere on Earth. Through the cloth at her hip, the dagger had begun to shine, woken properly by real moonlight. The pendant pulsed. Once — slow, warm as a coin held in a fist — against her sternum. Then again. It was pointing, or it was waking, and Isolde's word came back with it: fasting. "It's stirring," Nyx said, rising out of her shadow, edges solid again in the honest dark. "Rory. It's beginning to eat." She looked back once. There was only a clump of oaks in the bracken, and frost, and the far glow of London lying on the sky like a bruise. "Colder than eleven minutes," she said, and turned up her collar, and started toward the lights.
created_at"2026-09-02T09:30:23.815Z" 9/2/2026, 9:30:23 AM
model"z-ai/glm-5.3-20260816"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency2782
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time193700
tokens_prompt1547
tokens_completion13288
native_tokens_prompt1549
native_tokens_completion12392
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning9764
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
service_tier(null)
usage0.0566934
router(null)
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.19.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1788341423-MGkJGji3JFLjxqMCLhDm"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1788341423-B9rCS7uUBtXi6Ht3aBNt"
upstream_id"2026090217302424d4f58ebae745b7"
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"db975786-e7f6-4838-9e56-3e0b77f1bdc2"
id"2026090217302424d4f58ebae745b7"
is_byokfalse
latency2782
model_permaslug"z-ai/glm-5.3-20260816"
provider_name"Z.AI"
status200
total_cost0.0566934
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Z.AI"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"
workspace_id"97e315e5-d303-487d-83c1-83180e8a13d4"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags22
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"Rory said quietly [quietly]"
1"Then her head lifted [Then]"
dialogueSentences51
tagDensity0.431
leniency0.863
rawRatio0.091
effectiveRatio0.078
90.19% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2039
totalAiIsmAdverbs4
found
0
adverb"slowly"
count2
1
adverb"precisely"
count1
2
adverb"very"
count1
highlights
0"slowly"
1"precisely"
2"very"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
65.67% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2039
totalAiIsms14
found
0
word"resolved"
count1
1
word"warmth"
count3
2
word"shimmered"
count1
3
word"long shadow"
count1
4
word"whisper"
count2
5
word"stomach"
count1
6
word"footsteps"
count1
7
word"weight"
count1
8
word"could feel"
count1
9
word"chill"
count1
10
word"pulsed"
count1
highlights
0"resolved"
1"warmth"
2"shimmered"
3"long shadow"
4"whisper"
5"stomach"
6"footsteps"
7"weight"
8"could feel"
9"chill"
10"pulsed"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"stomach dropped/sank"
count1
highlights
0"stomach dropped"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences111
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount2
narrationSentences111
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
1"started to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences137
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen107
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2062
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions23
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
50.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions48
wordCount1504
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity0.93
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity3.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Richmond2
Park1
Rory14
Veil1
Nyx10
December3
June2
Shade1
Heartstone1
Hel1
Isolde10
Earth1
London1
persons
0"Rory"
1"Veil"
2"Nyx"
3"Shade"
4"Heartstone"
5"Hel"
6"Isolde"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"June"
3"London"
globalScore1
windowScore0.5
85.06% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences77
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"looked like a door"
1"it was — as if it lived in the air and not in a throat"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.485
wordCount2062
matches
0"neither afraid nor"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences137
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs64
mean32.22
std29.77
cv0.924
sampleLengths
039
153
218
38
42
597
629
721
89
918
1043
1111
122
1339
14135
1519
1610
1775
188
1965
207
214
2234
2314
2477
254
268
274
2818
2968
3076
314
3211
3366
3415
353
3664
3714
3830
394
4041
4123
4245
433
44107
458
4617
4741
4819
4954
95.78% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount3
totalSentences111
matches
0"been dipped"
1"was gone"
2"were scheduled"
96.64% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs258
matches
0"was like wading"
1"was smiling"
2"was pointing"
3"was waking"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount20
semicolonCount3
flaggedSentences17
totalSentences137
ratio0.124
matches
0"Nyx moved ahead of her — or above her, which was closer to the truth — a length of darker dark poured between the oaks, showing themselves only when they chose to."
1"She could still see the bark in them — the grain, the knots, the fossil ghost of an acorn cap — pressed into grey rock as though the tree had been dipped in stone while it slept."
2"Between the split stones the air was wrong in a way she couldn't name — heat-haze in December, a shimmer she felt in her teeth more than saw."
3"Warmth folded in around her — June warmth, hay-in-the-barn warmth — and light came from everywhere and nowhere, gold as honey left out in the sun, though there was no sun, only a pale amber sky with no clouds in it and no birds and no edges she could find."
4"Blackbirds sang from the treeline with their particular self-important sweetness, and when she turned her head, the song stayed exactly where it was — as if it lived in the air and not in a throat."
5"It happened slowly enough to watch — their edges fraying like cloth held to a flame, their violet eyes guttering down to embers, the honeyed light pressing on them like a thumb on a bruise."
6"Instead she checked the pendant — habit by now — and her stomach dropped."
7"They went deeper, because that was the whole errant, foolish point of the night — Nyx reading the shadows, Rory reading the ground."
8"A Richmond red stag, heavy-shouldered, its breath not steaming in the warm air — and its antlers were in bud."
9"She stopped; they stopped."
10"She started; they started."
11"The woman had simply arrived — no transition, no walking, just the difference between one blink and the next."
12"Silver hair fell to her waist; pale lavender eyes sat in a face that could have been twenty or two hundred."
13"Even at arm's length, Rory could feel the cold coming off it — a clean, deliberate cold, nothing like the pendant's dark chill."
14"It sat in her grip like nothing she'd ever carried — and she'd carried boxes, crates, a knife once or twice in a bad year — as if it had been waiting to be picked up since before she was born."
15"Crossing out was the static river in reverse, pennies and honey, and then December hit her like a slap of open water — frost, cold, her breath in small ghosts."
16"Once — slow, warm as a coin held in a fist — against her sternum."
88.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1495
adjectiveStacks2
stackExamples
0"particular self-important sweetness,"
1"clean, deliberate cold, nothing"
adverbCount59
adverbRatio0.03946488294314381
lyAdverbCount15
lyAdverbRatio0.010033444816053512
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences137
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences137
mean15.05
std13.56
cv0.901
sampleLengths
010
129
232
33
418
518
62
76
82
96
1030
1137
124
1311
144
155
1613
179
187
1911
2010
219
2218
2328
2415
257
264
272
289
2919
3011
3111
3250
3312
342
357
3628
3725
3819
3910
404
419
4236
4326
448
4535
4630
477
484
4917
69.34% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats15
diversityRatio0.48175182481751827
totalSentences137
uniqueOpeners66
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount6
totalSentences94
matches
0"Then her next step landed"
1"Somewhere a stream ran."
2"Somewhere chimes sounded, though nothing"
3"Instead she checked the pendant"
4"Then her head lifted, her"
5"Once — slow, warm as"
ratio0.064
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount24
totalSentences94
matches
0"She looked, and the clump"
1"She could still see the"
2"She took her hand back"
3"Her phone had signal nowhere"
4"It happened slowly enough to"
5"She looked down at the"
6"She dug it out from"
7"They went deeper, because that"
8"It regarded her with eyes"
9"They were a hundred paces"
10"She stopped; they stopped."
11"She started; they started."
12"Her hand went to her"
13"She was barefoot, dressed in"
14"Her own prints tracked back"
15"Her smile deepened, without comfort"
16"She turned toward the stream,"
17"She unwrapped it."
18"It sat in her grip"
19"Her phone shuddered awake and"
ratio0.255
100.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount67
totalSentences94
matches
0"Frost had turned Richmond Park"
1"The bracken crunched under Rory's"
2"Nyx moved ahead of her"
3"Tonight they chose."
4"Tonight, they had said, the"
5"Nyx whispered, and the wind"
6"She looked, and the clump"
7"She could still see the"
8"Frost silvered their shoulders."
9"She took her hand back"
10"Nothing about it looked like"
11"Nyx said, thin as pipe"
12"Nyx regarded it the way"
13"Crossing was like wading into"
14"Pressure crawled up her ears,"
15"The cold fell off her"
16"Warmth folded in around her"
17"Foxgloves stood in the grass"
18"Bluebells, commas of blue in"
19"The meadow ran farther than"
ratio0.713
100.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount2
totalSentences94
matches
0"Now it was cold."
1"Even at arm's length, Rory"
ratio0.021
51.95% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences55
technicalSentenceCount7
matches
0"The bracken crunched under Rory's boots like broken shells, and the cold went through her coat with the patience of something that had been waiting for her all …"
1"Nyx moved ahead of her — or above her, which was closer to the truth — a length of darker dark poured between the oaks, showing themselves only when they chose …"
2"And things she had no names for: flowers like paper lanterns, flowers like small masked faces, a vine climbing a stone with blossoms that opened as she watched."
3"Blackbirds sang from the treeline with their particular self-important sweetness, and when she turned her head, the song stayed exactly where it was — as if it …"
4"It happened slowly enough to watch — their edges fraying like cloth held to a flame, their violet eyes guttering down to embers, the honeyed light pressing on t…"
5"She was barefoot, dressed in the grey-green of lichen, and she was smiling the way people smile at arrivals that were scheduled long ago."
6"The dagger was slender and leaf-shaped, its metal pale and faintly luminous, like moonlight that had decided to hold a shape."
79.55% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags22
uselessAdditionCount2
matches
0"Nyx whispered, and the wind seemed to carry the word to her from three directions at once"
1"Then her head lifted, her gaze going past them at nothing"
71.57% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags18
fancyCount4
fancyTags
0"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
1"Nyx observed (observe)"
2"Nyx whispered (whisper)"
3"Isolde agreed (agree)"
dialogueSentences51
tagDensity0.353
leniency0.706
rawRatio0.222
effectiveRatio0.157
88.1251%