Run: 2026-09-03-01M1KBJJJTB58VCEK3J905P7R6

Run Details

Duration:
10m 44s
Cost:
$0.001987
Provider:
CoreWeave

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The air changed three steps down. The smell of Camden High Street—fried food, diesel, wet pavement—thinned and died, replaced by something older: damp chalk, rust, and the cold breath of a place that hadn't seen sun in a hundred years. Harlow Quinn paused on the crumbling stair, let her eyes adjust. The station below was a throat opening into the earth, tiled walls slick with condensation, the rails long since pried up and carted away. What remained was the hollow shell,and what had moved into it. Crime scene tape fluttered across the platform entrance, a garish yellow warning in a place that had no business with modern colors. Two uniformed officers bracketed the tape, shoulders hunched, breath fogging. One of them—young, pale—looked relieved when he saw her badge. "Detective Quinn. DS Cole's already down there." Of course he was. Cole liked to get to scenes first, stake out his interpretation before anyone else could muddy it. Quinn grunted and ducked under the tape. Her boots rang on the concrete, a lonely soundin the dark. She passed a row of empty stalls—crates and salvaged doors on trestles, hung with curtains of faded velvet. The kind of market that appeared and vanished, that left no forwarding address. The kind of place a man might come looking for things that weren't for sale anywhere else. Cole stood over the body, hands on his hips, a halogen work light pooling white at his feet. He was a solid man, silver creeping into his beard, the set of his shoulders saying he'd seen it all and none of it surprised him. He looked up as she approached, jerkeda chin at the corpse." "Henry Marsh, fifty-two, solicitor out of Hampstead. Wallet's intact, cards, cash. Watch says he paid more for it than I make in a month. No needle marks, no bruising, no obvious trauma. Looks like his heart just... stopped."" Quinn crouched. The dead man lay on his back between two stalls, legs straight, arms at his sides, overcoat smoothed flat beneath him. Too neat. A man dropped in terror didn't land like a soldier at rest. His face was the worst of it—mouth wrenched open, eyes wide, all the light behind them gone. She'd seen fright before. This was different. This wasa man who had looked at something the human brain wasn't built to process,and the looking had killed him. "Any witnesses?" she asked. Cole snorted. "It's a squat, Quinn. Squatters, dealers, kids looking for a cheap high. Nobody saw nothing." He gestured at the scattered debris—a toppled crate, jars of dried herbs shattered on the concrete, a pair of brass scales flung into a corner, silver dust glittering in the work light. "Stallholder panicked, turned the place over looking for the stash, done a runner. Drug deal gone wrong. Simple."" Quinn didn't answer. She was looking atthe dead man's right hand, curled tight around something small andwhite. She eased the fingers open—stiff, but not yet rigor—and revealed a disc of carved bone, about the size of a large coin, etched with symbols that weren't letters orb numbers. "Then why's he holding this?"" Cole leaned in, squinted. "Good-luck charm. Maybe he picked it up off the stall."" "He picked it up off the stall and died holding it so tight his knuckles went white."" The pattern on the bone matched nothing she'd seen in eighteen years. Not gang ink, not prison tats, not any occult fringe she'd run across in the weirder corners of the job. She turned it over. The reverse was worn smooth, as if handled for years., not minutes. "Excuse me."" A soft voice behind her. Quinn turned. Eva Kowalski stood at the edge of the light, round glasses catching the glare, curly red hair escaping a messy bun, a worn leather satchel heavy on her shoulder. Her freckled face was pinchednot afraid exactly, but alert, the way a deer is alert in an open field. She tucked a strand of hair behind her left ear, a nervous habit Quinn had catalogued the first time they'd met, two years ago, when Quinn had showed up at the British Museum with a photograph of a symbol she'd found carved into a dead man's sternum. "You got my message," Quinn said. It wasn't a question. Eva nodded, came closer, knelt on the damp concrete with none of Cole's reluctance. She looked atthe bone token,but didn't touch it. Her green eyes went wide behind the lenses. "That's a bone token."" "A what?" Cole said.**"An entry pass. The Veil Market moves every full moon, changes location. You can't find it unless you know where it's going—and you can't get in unless you hold one of these." Eva's voice dropped. "They're given to people the Market trusts. This one's old. Shade-work, see the etching? They don't make them like this anymore."" Cole made a sound somewhere between a laugh and a cough. "Shade-work. Right. Quinn, you brought a museum tour guide to a crime scene?"" "She's a research assistant," Quinn said mildly. She was watching Eva, watching the way the woman's eyes moved across the scattered debris—noting, counting, reading. Eva's gaze snagged on something near the base of a toppled crate,and her breath caught. Quinn followed her line of sight. A small brass compass lay half-buried under a fold of burlap, its casing filmed with verdigris, face etched with sigils that echoed the marks on the bone token. Quinn reached for it, and the moment her fingers closed around it, she felt something—a thrum, like a struck tuning fork pressed against her palm. She stood, held it flat. The needle swung, trembled, and settled, pointing not at the station's north—but at the tiled wall ten feet away. Quinn turned slowly. The needle held its bearing. She turned again. It swung back, like a dog returning to a scent. Cole was watching her now, arms crossed. "It's broken."" "It's not broken." Quinn walked toward the wall. The tiles were old, cream-colored, crazed with hairline cracks, generations of grime in the joints. The needle grew agitated as she approached—quivering, straining. She stopped three feet short. A cold draft licked her face, smelling of wet stone and something else, something acrid-sweet, like ozone after a lightning strike. She looked down. The dust on the floor in front of the wall was swept clean—a clear half-moon patch, as if something had recently stood there. Or come through there. "There's a rift here," Eva said quietly. She had followed, hugging her satchel."A place where the veil between worlds is thin. The Market sets up near them sometimes—they draw certain kinds of customers. But they're fixed. You can't move a rift."" "Veil," Cole repeated flatly. "Between worlds. Quinn, this is a dead man in a squat. This is a drug deal and a bad heart. Don't—"" "Then explain the wax."" Quinn pointed at the candles. She hadn't noticed them at first—they were small, cheap, tea lights and dinner candles, dozens of them, arranged in an uneven circle around the body. Some had burned down to pools of tallow; others were still guttering, thin flames wrestling the draft. But every single onehad wax run down its side in long, pale tongues—and every tongue pointed away from the body, outward, like a silent radial scream. Cole stared. "Someone lit candles around him. So what? Ritual crap."" "Ritual crap's usually laid out careful. This looks like damage control." Quinn crouched by the nearest candle. "The wax all blew outward at the same instant. Like something detonated right where the body lay, and all these flames got blasted flat." She looked up at Cole. "What does a drug deal gone wrong need candles for?"" Cole opened his mouth, closed it. He was a good detective, Cole. That was the problem. Good detectives could explain a lot—but not everything. And when the evidence didn't add up, he fell back on the world he knew. Quinn had done that too, once. Before Morris. Before the thing she'd found carved into Morris's sternum, and the museum archivist who'd gone pale at the sight of it, and whispered a word Quinn still couldn't pronounce properly. She knew now that the world was seamed, patched, leaking. She just didn't know through how many of those leaks the truth had to crawl before she caught up to it. She stood, compass still warm in her hand. She looked at the dead man, at his smooth overcoat and his laid-flat lapels, at his face frozen around a scream that hadn't had time to sound. She thought about the ransacked stall—valuable merchandise scattered like rubbish, nothing taken. A thief would have taken the silver dust, the brass scales, the locked strongbox behind the counter. A thief wouldn't leave a fortune in dirt. A search—someone looking for one specific thing. Someone who'd come back, found the body, found the rift yawning, and panicked. Someone who'd lit a circle of candles to keep whatever had come through from coming through again. Someone who'd smoothed the dead man's coat, straightened his limbs, closed his eyes? No—his eyes were still open, still full of nothing. Maybe they hadn't gotten that far. Maybe whatever killed him had done the tidying itself. "He stole something," Quinn said quietly. "From the stall." She held up the compass. "This. He used it to find the rift." She nodded atthe swept dust, at the cold breath atthe wall. "Maybe he wanted to run. Maybe he wanted to steal something out of whatever's on the other side. He opened it." She looked at the dead man again. "And something came out instead."" Cole was silent a long moment. Then he said, roughly, "You can't put that in a report."" "I know."" "So what are you going to do?"" Quinn looked at the compass. The needle had calmed now, held steady, still pointing atthe wall. It wasn't pointing north. It wasn't pointing anything but where it wanted to go. She tucked it into her coat pocket. The thrum against her palm settled into a low, steady pulse, like a second heart. "I'm going to seal this station," she said. "Get the body out. Tell forensics to scrape the grout out of that wall and test it." She met Cole's eyes. "For blood. Or whatever passes for it."" Cole shook his head slowly, but he didn't argue. He turned, called to the uniforms, started the machinery of removal. Quinn stayed where she was a moment longer, watching the candles gutter, watching the cold breath curl off the tiles. Somewhere deep in the earth, a train rumbled past—or something that sounded like one. She felt the compass pulse against her ribs, patient, insistent, like a thing that knew its way home and expected her to follow. She didn't know yet what had killed Henry Marsh. But she knew where to start looking now.
created_at"2026-09-03T10:03:34.396Z" 9/3/2026, 10:03:34 AM
model"deepseek/deepseek-v4-flash-20260731"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency5466
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time643446
tokens_prompt896
tokens_completion7472
native_tokens_prompt936
native_tokens_completion6663
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning4765
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
service_tier(null)
usage0.00198732
router(null)
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.19.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1788429814-QPmRoqlckLgQAOZCQLTR"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1788429814-R23A6v92mG3EnEExRS5V"
upstream_id"chatcmpl-4cf522b8-2ffe-44ea-8fd5-f6f359774e36"
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"cbfecbd7-9a18-45ea-bcd1-fabaa868db5c"
id"chatcmpl-4cf522b8-2ffe-44ea-8fd5-f6f359774e36"
is_byokfalse
latency754
model_permaslug"deepseek/deepseek-v4-flash-20260731"
provider_name"CoreWeave"
status200
total_cost0.00198732
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"CoreWeave"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"
workspace_id"97e315e5-d303-487d-83c1-83180e8a13d4"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
0.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags22
adverbTagCount5
adverbTags
0"Quinn said mildly [mildly]"
1"Eva said quietly. [quietly]"
2"Cole repeated flatly [flatly]"
3"something detonated right [right]"
4"Quinn said quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences40
tagDensity0.55
leniency1
rawRatio0.227
effectiveRatio0.227
94.54% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1830
totalAiIsmAdverbs2
found
0
adverb"slowly"
count2
highlights
0"slowly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
69.95% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1830
totalAiIsms11
found
0
word"fluttered"
count1
1
word"velvet"
count1
2
word"shattered"
count1
3
word"etched"
count2
4
word"charm"
count1
5
word"etching"
count1
6
word"echoed"
count1
7
word"trembled"
count1
8
word"pulse"
count2
highlights
0"fluttered"
1"velvet"
2"shattered"
3"etched"
4"charm"
5"etching"
6"echoed"
7"trembled"
8"pulse"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"knuckles turned white"
count1
highlights
0"knuckles went white"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells2
narrationSentences108
matches
0"looked relieved"
1"d in terror"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences108
filterMatches
0"know"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences125
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen103
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1806
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions13
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
50.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions54
wordCount1527
uniqueNames15
maxNameDensity1.31
worstName"Quinn"
maxWindowNameDensity3.5
worstWindowName"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Camden1
High1
Street1
Quinn20
Wallet1
Cole15
Kowalski1
British1
Museum1
Eva5
Veil1
Market2
Morris2
Henry1
Marsh1
persons
0"Quinn"
1"Cole"
2"Kowalski"
3"Eva"
4"Market"
5"Morris"
places
0"Camden"
1"High"
2"Street"
3"Wallet"
4"British"
5"Henry"
6"Marsh"
globalScore0.845
windowScore0.5
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences78
glossingSentenceCount1
matches
0"sounded like one. She felt the compass pul"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.554
wordCount1806
matches
0"not afraid exactly, but alert, the way a deer is alert in an open field"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences125
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs36
mean50.17
std39.09
cv0.779
sampleLengths
086
142
27
387
455
538
681
74
867
952
1014
1117
1248
132
14102
1510
1634
1759
1824
19152
2087
2141
2225
234
2473
2511
2656
27108
28146
2966
3017
312
327
3352
3436
3594
92.27% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount4
totalSentences108
matches
0"was pinched"
1"was swept"
2"got blasted"
3"was seamed"
64.41% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount6
totalVerbs295
matches
0"was looking"
1"was watching"
2"was watching"
3"were still guttering"
4"wasn't pointing"
5"wasn't pointing"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount24
semicolonCount1
flaggedSentences21
totalSentences125
ratio0.168
matches
0"The smell of Camden High Street—fried food, diesel, wet pavement—thinned and died, replaced by something older: damp chalk, rust, and the cold breath of a place that hadn't seen sun in a hundred years."
1"One of them—young, pale—looked relieved when he saw her badge."
2"She passed a row of empty stalls—crates and salvaged doors on trestles, hung with curtains of faded velvet."
3"His face was the worst of it—mouth wrenched open, eyes wide, all the light behind them gone."
4"\"It's a squat, Quinn. Squatters, dealers, kids looking for a cheap high. Nobody saw nothing.\" He gestured at the scattered debris—a toppled crate, jars of dried herbs shattered on the concrete, a pair of brass scales flung into a corner, silver dust glittering in the work light."
5"Quinn didn't answer. She was looking atthe dead man's right hand, curled tight around something small andwhite. She eased the fingers open—stiff, but not yet rigor—and revealed a disc of carved bone, about the size of a large coin, etched with symbols that weren't letters orb numbers. \"Then why's he holding this?\"\""
6"A soft voice behind her. Quinn turned. Eva Kowalski stood at the edge of the light, round glasses catching the glare, curly red hair escaping a messy bun, a worn leather satchel heavy on her shoulder. Her freckled face was pinched—not afraid exactly, but alert, the way a deer is alert in an open field. She tucked a strand of hair behind her left ear, a nervous habit Quinn had catalogued the first time they'd met, two years ago, when Quinn had showed up at the British Museum with a photograph of a symbol she'd found carved into a dead man's sternum."
7"\"A what?\" Cole said.**\"An entry pass. The Veil Market moves every full moon, changes location. You can't find it unless you know where it's going—and you can't get in unless you hold one of these.\" Eva's voice dropped."
8"She was watching Eva, watching the way the woman's eyes moved across the scattered debris—noting, counting, reading."
9"Quinn reached for it, and the moment her fingers closed around it, she felt something—a thrum, like a struck tuning fork pressed against her palm."
10"The needle swung, trembled, and settled, pointing not at the station's north—but at the tiled wall ten feet away."
11"\"It's not broken.\" Quinn walked toward the wall. The tiles were old, cream-colored, crazed with hairline cracks, generations of grime in the joints. The needle grew agitated as she approached—quivering, straining. She stopped three feet short. A cold draft licked her face, smelling of wet stone and something else, something acrid-sweet, like ozone after a lightning strike. She looked down. The dust on the floor in front of the wall was swept clean—a clear half-moon patch, as if something had recently stood there. Or come through there."
12"The Market sets up near them sometimes—they draw certain kinds of customers."
13"She hadn't noticed them at first—they were small, cheap, tea lights and dinner candles, dozens of them, arranged in an uneven circle around the body."
14"Some had burned down to pools of tallow; others were still guttering, thin flames wrestling the draft."
15"But every single onehad wax run down its side in long, pale tongues—and every tongue pointed away from the body, outward, like a silent radial scream."
16"Good detectives could explain a lot—but not everything."
17"She thought about the ransacked stall—valuable merchandise scattered like rubbish, nothing taken."
18"A search—someone looking for one specific thing."
19"No—his eyes were still open, still full of nothing."
20"Cole shook his head slowly, but he didn't argue. He turned, called to the uniforms, started the machinery of removal. Quinn stayed where she was a moment longer, watching the candles gutter, watching the cold breath curl off the tiles. Somewhere deep in the earth, a train rumbled past—or something that sounded like one. She felt the compass pulse against her ribs, patient, insistent, like a thing that knew its way home and expected her to follow. She didn't know yet what had killed Henry Marsh. But she knew where to start looking now."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount792
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount23
adverbRatio0.02904040404040404
lyAdverbCount6
lyAdverbRatio0.007575757575757576
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences125
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences125
mean14.45
std15.67
cv1.084
sampleLengths
06
134
211
324
411
522
610
710
87
94
1017
117
1211
1318
1413
1517
1618
1726
1811
197
204
2113
228
235
241
252
2621
272
2812
2917
304
313
3220
334
342
3547
3618
3752
384
3910
4017
4112
4220
434
4412
452
46102
4710
4834
4938
54.40% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats17
diversityRatio0.408
totalSentences125
uniqueOpeners51
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount3
totalSentences100
matches
0"Of course he was."
1"Maybe they hadn't gotten that"
2"Maybe whatever killed him had"
ratio0.03
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount27
totalSentences100
matches
0"Her boots rang on the"
1"She passed a row of"
2"He was a solid man,"
3"He looked up as she"
4"His face was the worst"
5"She'd seen fright before."
6"He gestured at the scattered"
7"She turned it over."
8"She was watching Eva, watching"
9"She stood, held it flat."
10"She turned again."
11"It swung back, like a"
12"You can't move a"
13"She hadn't noticed them at"
14"He was a good detective,"
15"She knew now that the"
16"She just didn't know through"
17"She stood, compass still warm"
18"She looked at the dead"
19"She thought about the ransacked"
ratio0.27
35.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount85
totalSentences100
matches
0"The air changed three steps"
1"The smell of Camden High"
2"Harlow Quinn paused on the"
3"The station below was a"
4"Crime scene tape fluttered across"
5"Cole liked to get to"
6"Quinn grunted and ducked under"
7"Her boots rang on the"
8"She passed a row of"
9"The kind of market that"
10"The kind of place a"
11"Cole stood over the body,"
12"He was a solid man,"
13"He looked up as she"
14"Wallet's intact, cards, cash."
15"Watch says he paid more"
16"Looks like his heart just..."
17"The dead man lay on"
18"A man dropped in terror"
19"His face was the worst"
ratio0.85
50.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences100
matches
0"Before the thing she'd found"
ratio0.01
38.69% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences48
technicalSentenceCount7
matches
0"The smell of Camden High Street—fried food, diesel, wet pavement—thinned and died, replaced by something older: damp chalk, rust, and the cold breath of a place…"
1"Crime scene tape fluttered across the platform entrance, a garish yellow warning in a place that had no business with modern colors."
2"He was a solid man, silver creeping into his beard, the set of his shoulders saying he'd seen it all and none of it surprised him."
3"A small brass compass lay half-buried under a fold of burlap, its casing filmed with verdigris, face etched with sigils that echoed the marks on the bone token."
4"She looked at the dead man, at his smooth overcoat and his laid-flat lapels, at his face frozen around a scream that hadn't had time to sound."
5"Someone who'd smoothed the dead man's coat, straightened his limbs, closed his eyes?"
6"Cole shook his head slowly, but he didn't argue. He turned, called to the uniforms, started the machinery of removal. Quinn stayed where she was a moment longer…"
98.68% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags19
uselessAdditionCount1
matches
0"he said, roughly,"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags9
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"Quinn didn't (do)"
1"Cole repeated flatly (repeat)"
dialogueSentences40
tagDensity0.225
leniency0.45
rawRatio0.222
effectiveRatio0.1
81.5977%