Run: 2026-09-23-01M36TP2JJ5TTS7HJJ08SEMYXH

Run Details

Duration:
1m 49s
Cost:
$0.003032
Provider:
Xiaomi

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The bone token got her through the cordon, though it took three uniforms and a sergeant with a clipboard to believe it. Harlow Quinn held the thing up between thumb and forefinger — a disc of something pale and dense, drilled through the middle and strung on a leather thong — and watched the sergeant's face cycle through disbelief, discomfort, and finally the blank compliance of a man who had decided the night could not get stranger and was wrong about that. He waved her down the steps. The old Camden High Street station had been closed since the sixties. The tiling was still there under the grime, oxblood and cream, an advertisement for some long-dead brand of soap faded to a ghost above the platform arch. But the platform itself had been transformed. Stalls of dark wood and iron, shuttered now, lined both sides. Glass jars caught the work-lights in rows along their shelves — things suspended in cloudy fluid that Harlow chose not to identify. The air had a layered smell she kept peeling back and disliking: damp, yes, and dust, and the mineral cold of deep brickwork, but underneath it something sweet and wrong, like flowers left too long in standing water. Scene of crime officers moved through it with the careful, humiliated dignity of professionals doing an unfamiliar job. One of them, a young woman named Prasad, had her jaw set so tight it looked wired shut. Harlow ducked under the second tape. "Where's the body?" "Down the far end, past the old ticket hall." Prasad fell in beside her, grateful to be moving. "Male, no ID yet. Stalls were running tonight — some kind of market. Uniforms say they scattered like roaches when the first car pulled up. We've got eleven detained upstairs and none of them are talking, guv, and I mean not a word. One of them laughed at me." "People who laugh at police officers generally have a reason. Keep your ears on." "They had these." Prasad held out an evidence bag. Inside, more bone tokens, a dozen of them, jostling like loose teeth. "Every one of them. No prints, no markings except a scratch mark on the back. Forensics says bone, but they couldn't say what from. Not cow, not sheep. They're still arguing about it." Harlow took the bag, turned it against the light. The scratch marks were shallow, repetitive, purposeful. Not an ornament. A count. "They were keeping tally," she said. "These aren't money. They're a record. Somebody was keeping track of who owed what." She handed it back. "Bag them separately, each one. Where they were found on each person. That matters." Prasad nodded, wrote, and looked fractionally less humiliated. The ticket hall had once been beautiful. Tiled pillars, a vaulted ceiling, a mosaic roundel on the floor cracked across its centre like a struck bone. And there, at the base of the pillar nearest the old stairwell, the dead man sat with his back to the brickwork, legs splayed, chin on his chest, as though he had stopped for a rest mid-conversation. Harlow crouched at the perimeter of the light and looked before she moved closer. That was a habit Morris had drilled into her — look first, so the body could tell you its version before the scene told you theirs. Morris, who had sat exactly like that himself at the end, propped against something, chin down, three years ago in a warehouse in Rotherhithe, with no marks on him the coroner could name. She looked away from the pose. She looked at the hands. "What have you got on cause?" she asked. "Nothing yet. No wounds Prasad could see, no lividity consistent with—" Prasad stopped, recalibrated. "It's odd, is what it is. He looks like he's been dead six hours. But the blood's wrong." "Wrong how." "There isn't any. Not externally, I mean. But there's a puddle under him and it's not blood either. It's—" She crouched and angled her lamp. Under the dead man, spreading in a wide irregular slick, a dark stain soaked into the mosaic. It gleamed under the lamp with an oily, opalescent sheen, like petrol on wet tarmac, and where the light caught it, colours moved through it that Harlow's eye couldn't quite name. Not a colour so much as the memory of one. "It's been sent up for analysis," Prasad said. "They won't like it." "Nobody likes anything tonight. Stay here." Harlow stepped in. She noted the shoes — expensive, handmade, pointed, absurd for a Tube station in any century. She noted the hands: soft, uncalloused, but the fingertips stained dark to the second knuckle, and the stain had the faintest iridescent shimmer. She noted the coat, the signet ring, the watch — good watch, stopped at 11:47 — and then she noted, with a small cold drop in her stomach, the thing hanging from the dead man's neck. A compass. Small, brass, on a chain of blackened silver. The casing carried a green crust of verdigris in its engraved grooves, and the engravings themselves were not decorative. She had seen marks like that once before, scratched into the doorframe of a flat in Peckham where a woman had been found dead of nothing at all. The sergeant on that scene had swept the marks away with a scouring pad before anyone photographed them. She had never forgiven him. The needle behind the glass was moving. Not settling. Moving. Slow, patient, deliberate, swinging through a slow arc and returning, swinging again, as though the compass were tracking something walking circles around the ticket hall. "Ma'am?" said a voice behind her, and Harlow straightened without a visible start. "I've been asked to consult." Eva Kowalski stood at the cordon line with her round glasses fogged from the climb down and her red curls escaping a clip in three directions. She had a canvas bag over one shoulder — the worn leather satchel with the books was a thing she'd had since university and had not brought tonight, which told Harlow she had come in a hurry — and her freckled face was pale with the particular pallor of someone who had recognised the address before she reached it. "You're the specialist," Harlow said. "For my sins. The Museum pulled my name when the token came up in evidence. May I?" Eva tucked her hair behind her left ear, caught herself doing it, and put both hands behind her back like a schoolgirl. "The token they described — pale disc, drilled, thong-strung. I'd need to see it." Harlow considered her. Twenty-six, a master's from Oxford, research assistant in the restricted archives at the British Museum — the restricted archives being the room the Museum pretended it did not have, where the acquisitions nobody wanted on a donor plaque were kept in flat grey boxes. Eva Kowalski read dead languages for a living and had the soft, indoor look of someone who had spent her life handling paper. But she had walked down forty-eight steps into a crime scene without being sick, and her eyes had gone straight past the body to the compass. Prasad brought the bag. Eva took it, held it to the light, turned it. "Bone," she said. "Human, probably femur. And this scoring — it's not tallying. It's names. Very old names, abbreviated. This is a reckon-board. In the Veil Market you don't trade in money, you trade in obligation, and the tokens are the ledger. Whoever holds a token with your mark on it owns a piece of your promise." She looked up. "Detective, this man wasn't a customer. If he's carrying eleven different marks and none of them are his own, he was the ledger-keeper. He held other people's debts. And now those debts have no owner." "Which means?" "Which means eleven very frightened people upstairs just lost their collateral. That's why none of them are talking. They aren't protecting a murderer. They're waiting to see who gets to their tokens first." Harlow filed it. She could use frightened people; frightened people talked eventually if you gave them the right silence. But her attention had kept snagging back on the compass, and now it snagged again, and this time she let it pull. She went back down beside the body and looked at the compass from the angle of a man sitting against a pillar with his chin on his chest. From there, the glass face would have been aimed across the ticket hall, toward the tiled arch where the platform began. "Ms Kowalski. Eva. What does that compass do?" Eva came to the edge of the light and did not step in, which was interesting. "Where did you see that?" "On him." "Ah." Eva swallowed. "Then I should tell you quickly, because it will sound less mad if I say it quickly. It's a Veil Compass. Shade-made — a specific artisan, from the patina I'd say about forty years old. They're extremely rare and they are not navigational in any sense you or I would mean. The needle doesn't point north. It points at the nearest breach. A thin place. A hole between where we are and somewhere else." She paused. "It's moving, isn't it." "It's circling." "It would circle," Eva said softly, "if the breach were behind it. The needle is trying to find the door and it can't, because he's sitting in the doorway. He died in the threshold. The compass is orbiting him because he is the hole, Detective, or what's left of where the hole was." The work-lights buzzed. Somewhere above, a door banged and a uniform shouted and was shushed. Harlow looked at the stain again. Oily, opalescent, colours that were memories of colours. She looked at the dead man's stained fingertips. She looked at the way his coat hung — heavier on one side, empty on the other. "He had a satchel," she said. "Or a bag. There's an abrasion on the left shoulder strap, you can see the wear pattern in the coat lining, and the coat's dragging to the right because it's unbalanced. Someone took it. Everything else on him is intact — the ring, the watch, the compass, right down to the signet. They didn't rob him. They took exactly one thing and it was the thing he carried in the bag." "Ledger-keeper," Eva breathed. "Oh. Oh, he had the master record. The rest were copies — the tokens are open accounts. The book would be the settlement. Whoever has the book can call in every debt at once." "Or cancel them," Harlow said. "Or forge them. Which is worth more than the ring." She stood. Her knee clicked. Morris would have said something dry about the mileage; she said it to herself instead, in his voice, and let it go. "What's your interpretation, Ms Kowalski?" Eva's hand hovered at her ear and stopped. "I think someone wanted a door, and this man held it open, and when he couldn't hold it any longer they took his book and walked through it. I think — I think they used him up. The stain, Detective. It isn't his blood. It's what he was spent on. What got in from the other side." "Or what got out," Harlow said. "That's the part you're not saying." Eva looked at her. Behind the round glasses, the green eyes went wide and then, slowly, frightened in a new key. "Yes," she said. "Or what got out." Because the needle had stopped circling. It had fixed, suddenly and absolutely, on a point past the far archway, down the dark length of the platform where the work-lights didn't reach — and it held there, quivering, the way a compass needle holds when it has found exactly what it was built to find. "Prasad," Harlow said, without raising her voice. "Nobody leaves the station. Nobody goes near the platform. Get me every person detained upstairs into separate rooms and give me their hands — fingertips, specifically, and photograph the nails. I want to know which of them has the same staining as our friend here. And find out who, exactly, was missing from that stall row when your people came down. Count the stalls. Count the jars. Somebody's closed up tidier than their neighbours." Prasad went. Her footsteps went quick and then quicker. Harlow looked at the compass one more time. The needle trembled toward the dark. Three years, she thought. Three years of a coroner's report that read the way coroners' reports read when nobody involved had the vocabulary. Morris propped against something, chin down, no marks on him anyone could name. And a stain on the warehouse floor that the cleaning crew had lifted before she ever saw it. She took the marker from her pocket and set it beside the mosaic's cracked centre without touching the slick. Then she straightened her watch on her left wrist, felt the worn leather settle against the bone, and walked toward the archway and the dark beyond it, not fast, not slow, the way she had learned to walk toward anything that did not want her. Behind her, Eva Kowalski said, "Detective, I really think you should wait," and then, quieter, to herself, in a voice Harlow caught and carried with her into the dark: "It's already moving toward us."
created_at"2026-09-23T09:48:53.719Z" 9/23/2026, 9:48:53 AM
model"xiaomi/mimo-v2.6-pro-20260921"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency3458
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time108809
tokens_prompt896
tokens_completion3398
native_tokens_prompt857
native_tokens_completion3056
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning166
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
service_tier(null)
usage0.003031515
router(null)
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.20.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1790156933-jMumiCQQ0p9tmGIg5ASL"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1790156933-TL7ASKuNbcyADrB2yBDg"
upstream_id"974c5df5-4506-4522-b0c5-748e147a3641_9077d35131394e18b960f4d57d6aad27"
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"4354fc36-b8ab-4ced-aa8c-0efb6b4523f1"
id"974c5df5-4506-4522-b0c5-748e147a3641_9077d35131394e18b960f4d57d6aad27"
is_byokfalse
latency3367
model_permaslug"xiaomi/mimo-v2.6-pro-20260921"
provider_name"Xiaomi"
status200
total_cost0.003031515
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Xiaomi"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"
workspace_id"97e315e5-d303-487d-83c1-83180e8a13d4"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags23
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Eva said softly [softly]"
dialogueSentences50
tagDensity0.46
leniency0.92
rawRatio0.043
effectiveRatio0.04
81.86% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2205
totalAiIsmAdverbs8
found
0
adverb"very"
count2
1
adverb"quickly"
count2
2
adverb"softly"
count1
3
adverb"slowly"
count1
4
adverb"suddenly"
count1
5
adverb"really"
count1
highlights
0"very"
1"quickly"
2"softly"
3"slowly"
4"suddenly"
5"really"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
81.86% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2205
totalAiIsms8
found
0
word"mosaic"
count3
1
word"stomach"
count1
2
word"silence"
count1
3
word"absolutely"
count1
4
word"footsteps"
count1
5
word"trembled"
count1
highlights
0"mosaic"
1"stomach"
2"silence"
3"absolutely"
4"footsteps"
5"trembled"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences104
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences104
filterMatches
0"look"
1"watch"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences131
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen76
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2225
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions24
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
66.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions55
wordCount1403
uniqueNames15
maxNameDensity1.28
worstName"Harlow"
maxWindowNameDensity3
worstWindowName"Eva"
discoveredNames
Quinn1
Camden1
High1
Street1
Harlow18
Prasad8
Morris4
Rotherhithe1
Tube1
Peckham1
Eva11
Kowalski3
Oxford1
British1
Museum2
persons
0"Quinn"
1"Harlow"
2"Prasad"
3"Morris"
4"Eva"
5"Kowalski"
6"Museum"
places
0"Camden"
1"High"
2"Street"
3"Rotherhithe"
4"Peckham"
5"Oxford"
6"British"
globalScore0.859
windowScore0.667
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences71
glossingSentenceCount1
matches
0"quite name"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount2225
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount1
totalSentences131
matches
0"like that himself"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs57
mean39.04
std30.63
cv0.785
sampleLengths
022
166
2117
336
49
567
614
754
821
938
108
1163
1273
1311
148
1532
162
1783
1812
196
2078
2180
227
2328
2418
2585
265
2753
2896
29109
302
3133
3241
3349
348
3521
362
3783
382
3953
4015
4139
4277
4337
4415
4527
465
4765
4812
4928
81.65% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount7
totalSentences104
matches
0"been closed"
1"been transformed"
2"been found"
3"were kept"
4"been aimed"
5"was shushed"
6"was built"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount1
totalVerbs236
matches
0"were tracking"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount12
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences11
totalSentences131
ratio0.084
matches
0"Harlow Quinn held the thing up between thumb and forefinger — a disc of something pale and dense, drilled through the middle and strung on a leather thong — and watched the sergeant's face cycle through disbelief, discomfort, and finally the blank compliance of a man who had decided the night could not get stranger and was wrong about that."
1"Glass jars caught the work-lights in rows along their shelves — things suspended in cloudy fluid that Harlow chose not to identify."
2"That was a habit Morris had drilled into her — look first, so the body could tell you its version before the scene told you theirs."
3"She noted the shoes — expensive, handmade, pointed, absurd for a Tube station in any century."
4"She noted the coat, the signet ring, the watch — good watch, stopped at 11:47 — and then she noted, with a small cold drop in her stomach, the thing hanging from the dead man's neck."
5"She had a canvas bag over one shoulder — the worn leather satchel with the books was a thing she'd had since university and had not brought tonight, which told Harlow she had come in a hurry — and her freckled face was pale with the particular pallor of someone who had recognised the address before she reached it."
6"Twenty-six, a master's from Oxford, research assistant in the restricted archives at the British Museum — the restricted archives being the room the Museum pretended it did not have, where the acquisitions nobody wanted on a donor plaque were kept in flat grey boxes."
7"She could use frightened people; frightened people talked eventually if you gave them the right silence."
8"She looked at the way his coat hung — heavier on one side, empty on the other."
9"Morris would have said something dry about the mileage; she said it to herself instead, in his voice, and let it go."
10"It had fixed, suddenly and absolutely, on a point past the far archway, down the dark length of the platform where the work-lights didn't reach — and it held there, quivering, the way a compass needle holds when it has found exactly what it was built to find."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1289
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount33
adverbRatio0.02560124127230411
lyAdverbCount12
lyAdverbRatio0.009309542280837859
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences131
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences131
mean16.98
std16.42
cv0.967
sampleLengths
022
160
26
312
427
57
611
722
838
918
1018
116
123
1318
1449
1514
169
1712
1833
199
207
213
222
236
2418
2514
268
277
2819
2937
3014
3126
3233
336
345
358
3614
3718
382
3925
4017
4131
4210
438
444
456
463
4716
4823
4936
68.70% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats10
diversityRatio0.4580152671755725
totalSentences131
uniqueOpeners60
77.52% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount2
totalSentences86
matches
0"Somewhere above, a door banged"
1"Then she straightened her watch"
ratio0.023
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount21
totalSentences86
matches
0"He waved her down the"
1"She handed it back"
2"She looked away from the"
3"She looked at the hands."
4"She crouched and angled her"
5"It gleamed under the lamp"
6"She noted the shoes —"
7"She noted the hands: soft,"
8"She noted the coat, the"
9"She had seen marks like"
10"She had never forgiven him."
11"She had a canvas bag"
12"She looked up"
13"She could use frightened people;"
14"She went back down beside"
15"She looked at the dead"
16"She looked at the way"
17"Her knee clicked."
18"It had fixed, suddenly and"
19"Her footsteps went quick and"
ratio0.244
99.53% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount62
totalSentences86
matches
0"The bone token got her"
1"Harlow Quinn held the thing"
2"He waved her down the"
3"The old Camden High Street"
4"The tiling was still there"
5"Stalls of dark wood and"
6"Glass jars caught the work-lights"
7"The air had a layered"
8"Scene of crime officers moved"
9"Harlow ducked under the second"
10"Prasad fell in beside her,"
11"Prasad held out an evidence"
12"Harlow took the bag, turned"
13"The scratch marks were shallow,"
14"She handed it back"
15"Prasad nodded, wrote, and looked"
16"The ticket hall had once"
17"Harlow crouched at the perimeter"
18"That was a habit Morris"
19"Morris, who had sat exactly"
ratio0.721
58.14% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences86
matches
0"Because the needle had stopped"
ratio0.012
31.75% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences45
technicalSentenceCount7
matches
0"Harlow Quinn held the thing up between thumb and forefinger — a disc of something pale and dense, drilled through the middle and strung on a leather thong — and…"
1"And there, at the base of the pillar nearest the old stairwell, the dead man sat with his back to the brickwork, legs splayed, chin on his chest, as though he h…"
2"Morris, who had sat exactly like that himself at the end, propped against something, chin down, three years ago in a warehouse in Rotherhithe, with no marks on …"
3"Slow, patient, deliberate, swinging through a slow arc and returning, swinging again, as though the compass were tracking something walking circles around the t…"
4"She had a canvas bag over one shoulder — the worn leather satchel with the books was a thing she'd had since university and had not brought tonight, which told …"
5"Eva Kowalski read dead languages for a living and had the soft, indoor look of someone who had spent her life handling paper."
6"Then she straightened her watch on her left wrist, felt the worn leather settle against the bone, and walked toward the archway and the dark beyond it, not fast…"
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags23
uselessAdditionCount1
matches
0"Harlow said, without raising her voice"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags14
fancyCount1
fancyTags
0"Eva breathed (breathe)"
dialogueSentences50
tagDensity0.28
leniency0.56
rawRatio0.071
effectiveRatio0.04
88.2558%