Run: 2026-10-13-01M4V1V5QJM2Y663X8TVQ53BG3

Run Details

Duration:
46.6s
Cost:
$0.032498
Provider:
Google AI Studio

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4414" name="Eva Kowalski" aliases="Eva, Evie" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Best Friend"> <eyeColor>green</eyeColor> <hair>curly red</hair> <height>5'4"</height> <age>26</age> <glasses>round glasses</glasses> <satchel>worn leather satchel full of books</satchel> <freckles>freckled complexion</freckles> <nervousHabit>tucking hair behind her left ear</nervousHabit> <description>Aurora's childhood friend and an occult researcher.</description> <backstory>Moved to London two years before Aurora and works as a research assistant at the British Museum's restricted archives. She holds a master's degree in Ancient History from Oxford.</backstory> </character> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> <item id="2004" name="Veil Compass" aliases="the Compass, shadow compass" type="Tool" origin="The Veil Market"> <casingMaterial>small brass compass</casingMaterial> <faceMarkings>face etched with protective sigils</faceMarkings> <needle>points toward the nearest supernatural rift or portal</needle> <patina>casing has a patina of verdigris</patina> <creator>crafted by a Shade artisan</creator> <description>A compass attuned to supernatural energy.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the mystery genre. A detective arrives at a crime scene in an unusual location. Something is wrong — the evidence doesn't add up. A colleague is present, offering a different interpretation. Through careful observation and deduction, the detective begins to see what others have missed. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The air in the abandoned Camden Tube station tasted of copper, damp soot, and something sharply floral that had no business festering fifty feet beneath Northern Line traffic. Detective Harlow Quinn paused at the bottom of the emergency spiral stairs, her boots clicking against the grime-slick concrete. She stood five-foot-nine, her posture rigid with the military precision that eighteen years in the Metropolitan Police had hammered into her spine. Overhead, portable halogen work lights had been rigged by the forensic team, casting harsh, theatrical shadows across the curved, tiled walls of the disused platform. She glanced at the worn leather watch on-her left wrist. 03:14. "Thought you’d given up on sleep entirely, Guv," a voice called out. Detective Constable Miller was crouching near the edge of the platform, his bulky frame wrapped in a crumpled white paper suit. He stood up, peeling off a pair of blue nitrile gloves with a sharp snap. "Sleep is for people with closed caseloads, Miller," Quinn said, stepping under the blue-and-white police tape. She didn't bother with a paper suit, only slipping on shoe covers and gloves. Her closely cropped salt-and-pepper hair bristled slightly in the cold draft tunneling through the dark bore of the tracks. "Walk me through it. Control said we had a squatter rivalry gone wrong." "That's the shape of it," Miller said, gesturing toward the center of the platform. "Urban explorers found him about two hours ago. Male, mid-thirties, no wallet, no phone. Throat lacerated. Looks like he interrupted a pop-up rave or an illegal market down here and paid the toll." Quinn approached the body, her brown eyes narrowing as she took in the wider platform before looking at the victim. That was always the mistake green detectives made—staring straight at the blood and missing the room. And the room was wrong. The station had been closed since the nineteen-twenties, yet the platform wasn't covered in the usual detritus of broken cider bottles, rusted needles, and sleeping bags. Instead, the concrete had been swept remarkably clean in distinct, rectangular patches, as if stalls or heavy rugs had been laid out in neat rows along the curved wall. Between these clean rectangles, the dust was thick and undisturbed. "A rave," Quinn repeated, her sharp jaw tightening. "With no sound system tracks, no nitrous canisters, and no footprints in the dust outside a very specific walkway." "Well, pop-up market, then," Miller amended, rubbing the back of his neck. "Camden's full of weirdos peddling counterfeit gear out of suitcases. Look at the chalk." He pointed the beam of his torch at the floor around the victim. There were indeed markings drawn on the stone, smudged by the victim's thrashing. Miller clearly saw graffiti. Quinn crouched down, her knees popping in the damp chill, and brought her face close to the floor. The substance wasn't chalk. It had a crystalline sheen under the halogen lights, mixed with something dark and greasy that smelled faintly of cloves and burnt tallow. And the lines weren't street tags. They were geometric, interlocking angles that made her eyes ache if she stared at the intersections too long. A cold prickle worked its way up the back of her neck. It was a sensation she hadn't felt in three years. Not since an alley in Whitechapel, where she had found DS Morris lying ten feet from his service weapon, his watch melted to his wrist and his eyes wide with a terror the coroner had lazily labeled massive cardiac arrest. "Look at the lividity, Miller," Quinn said, keeping her voice level. She pointed a gloved finger at the dead man’s exposed neck. The wound was deep, a clean slice from ear to ear, yet the concrete beneath him held barely a saucer’s worth of blood. "Where is it?" Miller frowned, stepping closer. "Moved after death?" "If he was killed elsewhere and dumped here, there'd be drag marks from the stairs, or transfer on his clothing," Quinn said, examining the man’s expensive wool overcoat. The nap of the fabric was pristine, save for the gray station dust where he had fallen straight down. "He died right here. Look at the spatter pattern on his cuffs. Fine mist. High velocity. Arterial. Yet the floor is dry." "Maybe the killer caught it in a basin?" Miller suggested, though he sounded unconvinced by his own theory. "Some kind of ritual nutjob?" "In the dark, on an uneven platform, without spilling a drop while the victim fought back?" Quinn reached down and gently lifted the dead man’s right hand. The fingernails were broken, scraped raw, caked with a greenish-blue powder. Not skin. Not dirt. Verdigris. She let the hand rest and checked his left palm, which was curled into a tight fist. Rigor was only just beginning to set in the small muscles of the fingers—another contradiction, given how cold the body felt to the touch. She pried the fingers open. Nested in the pale crease of his palm was a small disc of yellowed, porous material, carved into the shape of a coin. "Plastic token?" Miller asked, leaning over her shoulder. "Like for an arcade?" Quinn tapped it with the tip of her forensic tweezers. It produced a dull, dense click. "Bone. Marrow cavity is still visible on the rim." She bagged it, her gaze sweeping toward the far end of the platform where a tall, narrow shadow lingered just beyond the glare of the tripods. Standing near the mouth of the pedestrian tunnel was a young woman who looked entirely out of place among the burly CSI techs. She stood about five-foot-four, her freckled complexion pale under the harsh lights, a mass of curly red hair pinned back haphazardly. She wore round glasses that reflected the halogen glare, and a worn leather satchel bulged heavy with books against her hip. As Quinn watched, the woman reached up, nervously tucking a stray lock of red hair behind her left ear. "Who's the civilian?" Quinn asked, standing up. "Oh, that's Miss Kowalski," Miller said, waving a hand. "Research assistant from the British Museum. The night duty inspector called her in because of the weird symbols on the walls and that little trinket we found in the victim's coat pocket. Thought she might identify if it's some neo-pagan gang tag." Quinn didn't wait for Miller to finish. She strode across the platform, her boots eating up the distance. The young woman saw her coming and stiffened, her hand dropping to grip the strap of her book-laden satchel like a lifeline. "Detective Inspector Quinn," Harlow said, stopping a foot closer than normal social etiquette dictated. "You're Kowalski." "Eva Kowalski," the woman said. Her voice was quiet, educated, carrying the faint, precise cadence of someone who spent more time reading dead languages than speaking to the police. Behind the round lenses, her green eyes darted toward the body, then quickly away. "I was just telling the other officer—Constable Miller—that the markings are likely an elaborate hoax. A pastiche of late medieval alchemical shorthand. Nothing that belongs in a museum archive." Quinn watched Eva’s left hand rise again, fingers trembling slightly as she tucked that same curl of red hair behind her left ear. A tell. Eighteen years of interrogation rooms made a habit like that scream like a siren. "Is that right," Quinn said flatly. "And the item they pulled from his pocket? Miller, bring the evidence bag over." Miller jogged up, handing Quinn a clear plastic pouch before retreating a step to answer a buzz on his radio. Inside the bag was a small brass compass. Its casing was heavily corroded with a patina of verdigris—the exact greenish-blue substance caked under the dead man’s fingernails. He hadn't been scratching at an attacker; he had been desperately trying to claw this open, or keep it away from someone. The face of the compass didn't show north, south, east, or west. Instead, the metal beneath the cracked glass was etched with minuscule, interlocking sigils that mirrored the greasy lines on the floor. And the needle wasn't still. Even through the thick plastic of the evidence bag, the slender black needle was trembling, pulling hard not toward magnetic north, which lay up the tunnel toward Chalk Farm, but straight at the solid brick retaining wall three feet to Quinn’s left. Quinn held the bag up between herself and Eva. "A hoax, Miss Kowalski? Crafted with an active magnetic anomaly?" Eva’s breath hitched. Her gaze locked onto the small brass compass, and for a fraction of a second, the scholarly detachment vanished from her freckled face, replaced by pure, unadulterated dread. "There are high-voltage cables running behind these walls, Detective," Eva said, though her voice lacked conviction. "Old lines from the tramway era, or active Northern Line feeds. They create localized electromagnetic fields. Any cheap brass trinket from a Camden stall would spin down here." "The power to this spur was severed in nineteen-twenty-six," Quinn countered smoothly. She tilted the compass forty-five degrees, then walked three paces past the solid brick wall. Inside the bag, the needle swung wildly in a one-hundred-and-eighty-degree arc, pointing stubbornly back at the exact same patch of damp brick. "An electromagnetic field from a cable runs along a line, Miss Kowalski," Quinn said, stepping back to the spot. "This is pointing at a single focal point. Dead center of that masonry." Quinn turned her attention to the brick wall itself. She pulled a high-lumen penlight from her coat and shone it across the mortar. At first glance, it was just grime-caked Victorian brickwork. Then she looked lower, down at the baseboard level where the clean, swept rectangles of the floor met the wall. There were scuff marks on the vertical bricks. Dozens of them. Rubber soles, leather heels, the scrape of heavy crate corners—all impacting the solid wall as if people had been walking directly through it, or dragging cargo out of the solid stone. "Look at the dust distribution," Quinn murmured, half to herself, though she kept her peripheral vision locked on the young researcher. "The stalls were set up *here*. Not for a rave. A market. It was operating tonight—no, yesterday was the full moon. The grime over these clean patches is less than twenty-four hours old. They packed up and cleared out right before the explorers came down." "People trade illegal goods in tunnels all the time," Eva said tightly, hugging her heavy leather satchel closer to her ribs. "And how do they get the goods down here?" Quinn asked, turning her sharp gaze back to Eva. "The spiral stairs are rusted through on the third landing; our techs had to use climbing ropes to bring the generators down. The track tunnels are bricked off forty yards out with iron grates that haven't been unbolted in a decade. Yet someone brought an entire market's worth of tables, stock, and buyers into a sealed stone box, and took them all out again—along with four pints of that man's blood." Eva swallowed hard. Her fingers twitched toward her left ear again, stopping halfway when she realized Quinn was watching the movement. "I'm a historian, Detective. I study dead cultures at the British Museum. I don't know anything about logistics or smuggling." "You have a master's from Oxford, and access to the restricted archives," Quinn said, recalling the brief summary dispatch had given her of their consultant. "And when you looked at this compass, you didn't look confused. You looked like someone who recognized the maker's mark." "I didn't—" "I knows when I'm being managed, Miss Kowalski," Quinn interrupted, her voice dropping an octave, cold and quiet enough that Miller and the techs thirty feet away couldn't hear. She held up the second evidence bag containing the pale disc. "A bone token in his left hand. A verdigris-crusted compass in his pocket pointing at a solid wall covered in shoe scuffs. And you, showing up at three in the morning with a bag full of reference books you haven't once opened because you already knew what was written on this floor before you stepped off the stairs." Eva’s green eyes widened behind her glasses. The silence between them stretched, filled only by the distant, subterranean rumble of a night bus passing high above on Camden High Street and the hum of the portable lights. Quinn looked back at the compass needle, still straining frantically against the glass toward the blank brick wall, where a faint draft of that impossible, floral air seemed to be bleeding right through the mortar. Three years of chasing ghosts, of reading redacted pathology reports on DS Morris, suddenly crystallized into a sharp, undeniable edge. There was a door here that didn't use hinges. There was a market that vanished with the moon. And the young woman standing in front of her—and whoever she was protecting—knew how to use the key. "You're done consulting for the night, Miss Kowalski," Quinn said, slipping both the bone token and the shadow compass into her own inner coat pocket instead of returning them to Miller's evidence tray. "Give your statement to the constable at the cordon. I'll be by the museum tomorrow to discuss your archive's definitions of a hoax." Eva didn't argue. She gave a jerky, brittle nod, turned on her heel, and hurried toward the spiral stairs, her hand flying up one last time to tuck a red curl behind her left ear before she disappeared into the gloom. Miller walked back over, wiping sweat from his forehead. "What did the boffin say, Guv? Just kids playing at devil worship?" Quinn stared at the solid brick wall, watching the microscopic tremor of dust motes drifting out from the solid mortar against the beam of her torch. "Bag the body, Miller," Quinn said, her jaw set like iron. "And tell the forensic photographers I want ultraviolet and infrared sweeps of every square inch of this masonry. We aren't looking for squatters anymore."
created_at"2026-10-13T16:34:31.294Z" 10/13/2026, 4:34:31 PM
model"google/gemini-4-argon-20261013"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency1560
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time46569
tokens_prompt896
tokens_completion3532
native_tokens_prompt909
native_tokens_completion3068
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"STOP"
service_tier(null)
usage0.032498
router(null)
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.21.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1791909271-jEiITLeRsN14I1AiinZR"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1791909271-3spMqgJ9Gr9QCtgpEEcX"
upstream_id"l13OavqpF9HVjMcP_8y7kA0"
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"4934736c-d662-4fe3-98eb-56def8c8c174"
id"l13OavqpF9HVjMcP_8y7kA0"
is_byokfalse
latency1560
model_permaslug"google/gemini-4-argon-20261013"
provider_name"Google AI Studio"
status200
total_cost0.032498
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Google AI Studio"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"
workspace_id"97e315e5-d303-487d-83c1-83180e8a13d4"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
84.62% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags26
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"Quinn said flatly [flatly]"
1"Quinn countered smoothly [smoothly]"
2"Eva said tightly [tightly]"
dialogueSentences51
tagDensity0.51
leniency1
rawRatio0.115
effectiveRatio0.115
78.54% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2330
totalAiIsmAdverbs10
found
0
adverb"sharply"
count1
1
adverb"slightly"
count2
2
adverb"very"
count1
3
adverb"lazily"
count1
4
adverb"gently"
count1
5
adverb"nervously"
count1
6
adverb"quickly"
count1
7
adverb"tightly"
count1
8
adverb"suddenly"
count1
highlights
0"sharply"
1"slightly"
2"very"
3"lazily"
4"gently"
5"nervously"
6"quickly"
7"tightly"
8"suddenly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
80.69% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2330
totalAiIsms9
found
0
word"chill"
count1
1
word"crystalline"
count1
2
word"pristine"
count1
3
word"etched"
count1
4
word"magnetic"
count2
5
word"silence"
count1
6
word"crystallized"
count1
7
word"gloom"
count1
highlights
0"chill"
1"crystalline"
2"pristine"
3"etched"
4"magnetic"
5"silence"
6"crystallized"
7"gloom"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count1
highlights
0"eyes widened"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences113
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences113
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences138
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen72
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans1
markdownWords1
totalWords2320
ratio0
matches
0"here"
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions25
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
50.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions72
wordCount1604
uniqueNames20
maxNameDensity1.81
worstName"Quinn"
maxWindowNameDensity3.5
worstWindowName"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Camden2
Tube1
Northern1
Line1
Harlow2
Quinn29
Metropolitan1
Police1
Detective2
Constable1
Miller13
Whitechapel1
Morris2
Standing1
Eva9
Chalk1
Farm1
Victorian1
High1
Street1
persons
0"Harlow"
1"Quinn"
2"Constable"
3"Miller"
4"Morris"
5"Standing"
6"Eva"
places
0"Camden"
1"Metropolitan"
2"Whitechapel"
3"Chalk"
4"Farm"
5"High"
6"Street"
globalScore0.596
windowScore0.5
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences92
glossingSentenceCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.431
wordCount2320
matches
0"not toward magnetic north, which lay up the tunnel toward Chalk Farm, but straight at the solid brick retaining wall three feet to Qui"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences138
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs59
mean39.32
std21.99
cv0.559
sampleLengths
028
166
211
312
436
562
647
736
85
965
1027
1126
1248
1351
1462
1548
167
1769
1823
1943
2046
2123
2212
2351
2484
257
2651
2740
2816
2972
3039
3120
3220
3382
345
3542
3619
3731
3844
3927
4022
4132
4252
4342
4466
4521
4689
4741
4845
492
89.74% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences113
matches
0"been rigged"
1"been closed"
2"been swept"
3"been laid"
4"was curled"
5"was etched"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount3
totalVerbs267
matches
0"was crouching"
1"was watching"
2"was protecting"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount6
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences7
totalSentences138
ratio0.051
matches
0"That was always the mistake green detectives made—staring straight at the blood and missing the room."
1"Rigor was only just beginning to set in the small muscles of the fingers—another contradiction, given how cold the body felt to the touch."
2"Its casing was heavily corroded with a patina of verdigris—the exact greenish-blue substance caked under the dead man’s fingernails."
3"He hadn't been scratching at an attacker; he had been desperately trying to claw this open, or keep it away from someone."
4"Rubber soles, leather heels, the scrape of heavy crate corners—all impacting the solid wall as if people had been walking directly through it, or dragging cargo out of the solid stone."
5"\"The spiral stairs are rusted through on the third landing; our techs had to use climbing ropes to bring the generators down. The track tunnels are bricked off forty yards out with iron grates that haven't been unbolted in a decade. Yet someone brought an entire market's worth of tables, stock, and buyers into a sealed stone box, and took them all out again—along with four pints of that man's blood.\""
6"And the young woman standing in front of her—and whoever she was protecting—knew how to use the key."
94.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1631
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"exact greenish-blue substance"
adverbCount55
adverbRatio0.03372164316370325
lyAdverbCount30
lyAdverbRatio0.018393623543838136
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences138
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences138
mean16.81
std11.26
cv0.67
sampleLengths
028
119
222
325
410
51
612
721
815
916
1014
1119
1213
1314
1433
1520
1616
175
1826
1929
2010
218
2219
2312
2414
2513
2613
274
2818
294
3023
316
3218
3312
3410
3540
3611
3711
3823
393
404
413
4228
4319
4422
4518
465
4727
4811
492
73.72% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats4
diversityRatio0.45985401459854014
totalSentences137
uniqueOpeners63
92.59% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount3
totalSentences108
matches
0"Instead, the concrete had been"
1"Instead, the metal beneath the"
2"Then she looked lower, down"
ratio0.028
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount26
totalSentences108
matches
0"She stood five-foot-nine, her posture"
1"She glanced at the worn"
2"He stood up, peeling off"
3"She didn't bother with a"
4"Her closely cropped salt-and-pepper hair"
5"He pointed the beam of"
6"It had a crystalline sheen"
7"They were geometric, interlocking angles"
8"It was a sensation she"
9"She pointed a gloved finger"
10"She let the hand rest"
11"She pried the fingers open."
12"It produced a dull, dense"
13"She bagged it, her gaze"
14"She stood about five-foot-four, her"
15"She wore round glasses that"
16"She strode across the platform,"
17"Her voice was quiet, educated,"
18"Its casing was heavily corroded"
19"He hadn't been scratching at"
ratio0.241
71.11% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount84
totalSentences108
matches
0"The air in the abandoned"
1"Detective Harlow Quinn paused at"
2"She stood five-foot-nine, her posture"
3"She glanced at the worn"
4"a voice called out"
5"Detective Constable Miller was crouching"
6"He stood up, peeling off"
7"Quinn said, stepping under the"
8"She didn't bother with a"
9"Her closely cropped salt-and-pepper hair"
10"Miller said, gesturing toward the"
11"Quinn approached the body, her"
12"That was always the mistake"
13"The station had been closed"
14"Quinn repeated, her sharp jaw"
15"Miller amended, rubbing the back"
16"He pointed the beam of"
17"Miller clearly saw graffiti."
18"Quinn crouched down, her knees"
19"The substance wasn't chalk."
ratio0.778
46.30% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount1
totalSentences108
matches
0"Even through the thick plastic"
ratio0.009
49.18% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences61
technicalSentenceCount8
matches
0"Instead, the concrete had been swept remarkably clean in distinct, rectangular patches, as if stalls or heavy rugs had been laid out in neat rows along the curv…"
1"They were geometric, interlocking angles that made her eyes ache if she stared at the intersections too long."
2"Standing near the mouth of the pedestrian tunnel was a young woman who looked entirely out of place among the burly CSI techs."
3"She wore round glasses that reflected the halogen glare, and a worn leather satchel bulged heavy with books against her hip."
4"The young woman saw her coming and stiffened, her hand dropping to grip the strap of her book-laden satchel like a lifeline."
5"Her voice was quiet, educated, carrying the faint, precise cadence of someone who spent more time reading dead languages than speaking to the police."
6"Instead, the metal beneath the cracked glass was etched with minuscule, interlocking sigils that mirrored the greasy lines on the floor."
7"Rubber soles, leather heels, the scrape of heavy crate corners—all impacting the solid wall as if people had been walking directly through it, or dragging cargo…"
86.54% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags26
uselessAdditionCount2
matches
0"Quinn repeated, her sharp jaw tightening"
1"Eva said, though her voice lacked conviction"
71.57% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags21
fancyCount4
fancyTags
0"Quinn repeated (repeat)"
1"Miller suggested (suggest)"
2"Quinn murmured (murmur)"
3"Quinn interrupted (interrupt)"
dialogueSentences51
tagDensity0.412
leniency0.824
rawRatio0.19
effectiveRatio0.157
85.6197%