Molly and Bill sat across from each other at a dingy diner booth, greasy stains dotting their menus. "So here's the plan," Bill said, his thick mustache twitching. "We wait 'til the brats are distracted by the clown. Then we strike." Molly arched a perfectly plucked eyebrow. "The kids?" "Nah, who cares about 'em. I'm talking about all those wrapped gifts! Disappointing birthday for this little brat." Molly smirked. "Karma's a b*tch. Especially to spoiled rotten snobs...How are we gonna get past the parents?" Bill leaned in conspiratorially. "You're lookin' at it, babe. The pool party's in the backyard. We sneak around the side, slip through the picket fence. Bam! Gifts as far as the eye can see." "They'll probably have security. Babysitters. Nannys." "Please. Lob a few of those Pepsi bottles filled with lighter fluid, and all the adults will be outside with extinguishers, giving us the all clear." Molly's eyes lit up. "I like the way you think, sugar. And for once, the element of surprise is on our side. Lotta rich parents would never suspect two grown-ass adults to do this...especially at a kid's party." "Exactly. We blend in with guests dropping off gifts. I'll wear my 'skimpy' Santa outfit. Ya know, the blue fleece type that couldn't cover a toothpick." "And I'll use magic to make my bump look legitimate," Molly said with a giggle, patting her fake belly. "If ya act pregnant enough to waddle, you'll get plenty of seating at the kiddie table. Meanwhile, I sneak off to scope the presents." They next discussed which type of weapons they'd carry in their chub waists and when they'd leg it to the getaway car, but the waitress interrupted. "Decided yet, you two lovebirds?" Bill leered at her, two fingers hovering over his coffee cup. "I'll take the Crispy Chicken. Easy on the carbs." Molly feigned a tortured sigh and patted her balloon-shaped belly again. "Most pregnant cheerleaders crave chocolate milkshakes, but a half and half will do just fine." The waitress knew to leave the weird couple to their bizarre plotting. Molly and Bill, however, were just getting started. They couldn't wait until the real fun began- the b-day bash of the century!