"I can't believe we're doing this," Molly whispered, nervously glancing around the dark alley. "Stealing presents from a children's party? That's low, even for us." "It's the perfect crime!" Bill exclaimed, his grin barely visible in the dim light. "No one expects thieves at a birthday party, and those kids won't even know what hit 'em." "Yeah, but still," Molly protested. "There must be a hundred other ways to make a quick buck without ruining some poor kid's special day." Bill scoffed. "We're not monsters, Molly. We'll leave 'em the cake and ice cream. Besides, with all the fancy gadgets and gizmos rich folks buy for their little brats these days, we'll make a fortune!" "Fine," Molly relented, "but let's get this over with quickly. If we get caught by a bunch of angry parents armed with cell phone cameras and social media accounts, our careers as thieves will be toast." "Deal," Bill said, handing Molly a pair of latex gloves. "Let's review the plan one more time. You distract the adults by pretending to be the entertainer while I sneak into the gift room and load up our bag." "Got it," Molly confirmed. "And remember, if anything goes wrong, we meet back at the van, and I'll drive us out of here faster than you can say 'Pin the tail on the donkey.'" As they approached the sprawling suburban home, the unmistakable sounds of excited children filled the air. The party was in full swing. Molly hesitated at the doorstep, her stomach twisting with guilt. "This doesn't feel right, Bill." "Come on, Molly," Bill urged. "We need this job if we're going to make rent. Just think of it as a wealth redistribution program for pint-sized capitalists." Molly sighed. "Okay, but if any kid starts crying, I'm calling it off." Bill nodded and slipped into the shadows as Molly took a deep breath and pressed the doorbell. Moments later, a harried-looking woman answered the door, her eyes widening in surprise as she saw Molly's balloon-twisting costume. "Oh, thank goodness you're here!" the woman exclaimed. "We've been waiting for the balloon artist, and the kids are getting restless." "Uh, yeah," Molly stammered, "I mean, I'm here to save the day! Just show me where the party's at, and I'll have those kiddos laughing and squealing in no time!" The woman ushered Molly inside, leading her to a backyard teeming with energetic children. Molly scanned the crowd, quickly spotting Bill lurking near a side entrance. With a subtle nod, she launched into her role as the world's most unlikely balloon artist. As she fumbled her way through balloon swords and misshapen dogs, Molly kept an eye on Bill's progress. He moved stealthily through the house, reaching the gift room without incident. As he began loading their bag with brightly wrapped presents, Molly breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe they would pull this off after all. But just as Bill was zipping up the bag, a small voice called out, "Hey, mister! What are you doing with my presents?" Molly froze, a half-inflated balloon animal dangling limply in her hands. This was it. The jig was up. She prepared to drop the balloons and make a break for the van, but then, a smile spread across Bill's face. "Don't worry, kiddo," he said, winking at the child. "I'm just making sure all the presents are nice and safe. Now, why don't you run along and find the real balloon artist? I bet she's got something special for you." The child giggled and dashed off, leaving Bill to make his escape. Molly quickly gathered her balloons and made her way to the front door, her heart pounding with adrenaline. Outside, Bill met Molly at the van, his grin now stretched from ear to ear. "Told you it was the perfect crime!" "Let's just get out of here before the birthday boy realizes he's been duped," Molly replied, sliding into the driver's seat. As they sped away, the sounds of the party fading into the distance, Molly couldn't help but wonder how their lives had led them to this moment: two thieves, fleeing the scene of a children's party with a bag full of stolen presents. But as she glanced at Bill, his eyes sparkling with excitement and relief, Molly knew that no matter how absurd their situation might be, she wouldn't want to face it with anyone else.