Molly peered through the binoculars at the bouncy castle in the backyard. Bill crouched beside her, munching on a stolen sandwich. "Well?" he asked, spraying crumbs. "Seven-year-old's birthday party. Princess theme. I count twelve presents on the gift table." "Twelve? That's it? We're risking jail time for twelve presents from second-graders?" "Have you seen what parents spend these days? That pink box alone is from FAO Schwarz." "How can you tell from here?" "Because I have eyes, William. Also, I googled the guest list. The Pemberton kid's dad owns three car dealerships." Bill grabbed the binoculars. "Is that a pony?" "Focus, Bill. We're not stealing the pony." "I'm just saying, if we're already there—" "No ponies. We agreed. Presents only." "Fine. So what's the plan? Wait until they cut the cake?" "Amateur. During cake is when Cousin Randy live-streams everything for Instagram. We go in during musical chairs." "Musical chairs? You're joking." "Think about it. Maximum chaos. Kids screaming, parents drinking, that one competitive mom physically removing chairs. Nobody watches the gift table during musical chairs." "What about security?" Molly snorted. "It's a seven-year-old's party in suburbia, not a bank vault." "They could have a dog." "They have a goldfish named Mr. Bubbles." "You researched their fish?" "I'm thorough. Now, you'll need to blend in. I brought you something." She handed him a shopping bag. Bill pulled out a bright yellow shirt reading 'WORLD'S BEST UNCLE.' "Absolutely not." "Every kids' party has a creepy uncle. You'll fit right in." "I'd rather go to actual jail." "That can be arranged if you blow this. Put on the shirt." "What's your disguise then?" "Overwhelmed mom dropping off a late gift. I've got yoga pants and everything." "This is insane. We robbed three banks last year." "And now we're robbing little Madison's birthday party. Economy's tough." Bill struggled into the shirt. "What kind of seven-year-old has party security anyway?" "The kind whose mom hired a photographer, a face painter, and a guy in a knockoff Elsa costume. Rich people are paranoid." "Says the woman planning to steal from children." "We're stealing from their parents. Big difference." "Is it though?" "Do you want to eat this month or not?" "I want to eat something better than stolen sandwiches." "Then put on your uncle smile and remember the plan. You distract Elsa, I grab the goods." "Why do I have to distract Elsa?" "Because I'm not wearing the uncle shirt. Ready?" Bill stood up, adjusting the horrible yellow fabric. "If we get caught, I'm telling them this was your idea." "If we get caught by suburban parents and a bootleg Disney princess, we deserve it. Now move. Musical chairs starts in five minutes." They crept toward the fence, the sounds of children's laughter mixing with their quiet bickering. "Next time, we're robbing adults." "Deal. After we sell Madison's presents."