Molly peered through the binoculars, the lenses aimed at a chaotic backyard festooned with streamers. “Okay, presents are on the patio table, right next to the unicorn-shaped punch bowl. Point of entry is the side gate by the garbage cans. It’s a soft target, Bill. Emphasis on soft.” “Soft like a pillow or soft like a marshmallow?” Bill asked, craning his neck to see over her shoulder. He was already wearing the rainbow-striped boa he’d insisted was crucial for blending in. “Soft like the parents running this thing, Bill. They’re running on fumes and cheap chardonnay. They won’t notice a thing.” Molly lowered the binoculars. “You remember the plan?” “I’m the distraction,” Bill said, puffing out his chest. “I create a diversion while you secure the assets.” “Right. And what’s the diversion?” “I challenge the birthday boy to a dance-off.” “No. Absolutely not. Last time you did that, you threw your hip out for a week. You’re going to compliment the hostess on her deviled eggs and ask for the recipe. It will confuse and fluster her long enough for me to bag the loot.” Bill’s face fell. “But the dance-off is so much more theatrical. What about the clown? He’s a wildcard, Molly. A real loose cannon. I saw him pull a flower out of his sleeve that squirts water. That’s a tactical weapon.” “It’s a plastic flower, Bill, and it’s filled with tap water. He is not a threat. He is a seventeen-year-old named Kevin who’s saving up for a moped. Now, focus. I grab the presents, you exfiltrate through the front, and we meet back at the van. What’s the primary objective?” “Steal all the presents,” Bill recited, his eyes gleaming. “Do you think there’s a remote-control car in there? I’ve always wanted one of the fast ones.” “The primary objective is profit, Bill. We’re selling these things. We’re not keeping them.” “But what if one of the presents is for us, you know? Karmically. Like, a box of LEGOs.” Molly sighed, rubbing her temples. “Just… just go get some cake first. Get a piece of cake. Then go talk about deviled eggs. And don’t you dare touch the bouncy castle.” “Right. Cake, then eggs, no Bouncing. This is the best heist ever.” Bill opened the van door, the boa fluttering behind him. “I hope it’s chocolate.”