The interior of the ‘87 Econoline van smelled faintly of stale coffee and regret. Molly tapped a finger on the crude blueprint spread across the dashboard, which was, in reality, a child’s drawing of a backyard done in purple crayon. A large circle was labeled “PRESENTS!!!” in wobbly letters. “The target is 14 Maple Drive. Subject: A child’s birthday party. We hit the gift table during the primary distraction.” Her voice was all business, a stark contrast to the cartoon sun smiling from the corner of the map. Bill, who was meticulously polishing a single shoelace, looked up. “Is that the one with the dinosaur theme? I saw a T-Rex balloon being inflated this morning. It looked majestic.” Molly’s eye twitched. “Focus, Bill. The payload is the presents. Not the balloons, not the bouncy castle. The wrapped goods.” “So, no cake then?” Bill asked, his face falling with genuine disappointment. “Because that’s a lot of effort for no cake. A man needs incentives.” “We are not there for cake,” Molly said, her voice dangerously low. She pointed a grimy finger at a stick figure on the map labeled ‘Brenda (Mom)’. “The window opens when the magician starts his act. That’s our signal. I’ll engage Brenda, create a diversion.” “What kind of diversion?” Bill leaned forward, intrigued. “A ‘saw the lady in half’ diversion, or a ‘pull a string of endless handkerchiefs’ diversion? The second one seems less effective for a getaway.” “It’s a ‘pretend to be a long-lost aunt’ diversion,” she hissed. “You grab the goods and get them to the sedan. I want us in and out in ninety seconds flat.” “Ninety seconds?” Bill’s eyes widened in horror. “But what if the piñata is about to be broken? That’s prime present-grabbing time, right after the sugar rush kicks in and the chaos is maximal.” He lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “I saw a Lego fire truck through the binoculars. A big one.” Molly dropped her head into her hands, the weight of the operation pressing down on her. “Just get the bag, Bill. And for the last time, we are not stealing the bouncy castle.” “I wasn’t going to,” he said, offended. “I was just wondering if its structural integrity could support a quick escape over the fence.”