Run: 2026-02-16-01KHK9CRDEMM53FA729EB239CQ

The alley behind the community center smelled like sugar and panic; confetti stuck to their shoes as the bouncy castle wheezed like a dragon with hay fever. A hand-drawn map quivered under a donut grease paperweight. "We are not stealing, Bill; we are relocating joy to a secure, offsite joy facility." "You mean your apartment, Molly, which is already 80 percent wrapping paper and 20 percent regret." "Semantics. The target is a birthday of indeterminate ferocity. We need disguises with moral fiber." "I brought matching high-visibility vests that say Gift Safety Inspector and smell like citrus justice." "Excellent. Also, clipboards. People trust anyone with a list and a sense of terrible authority." Molly adjusted a vest the color of emergency lemons; Bill, already glittered, squinted at the map like it owed him rent. "Fine, but the list currently says, One piñata, several cupcakes, and a partridge in a bouncy castle." "That's a decoy partridge. Focus. Obstacle one: a magician who thinks scarves are a personality." "I can out-misdirect him with the Distract-o-Matic, which is a shoebox full of squeaky ducks." "Respectfully, that is a Misdirect-o-Maybe. We need contingency sprinkles and a backflip plan." "Backflips are off the table since my hamstrings unionized. However, I can wobble menacingly." From inside the hall, a chorus of tiny shrieks and the thump of inflatable architecture promised chaos worthy of a documentary. "Then wobble toward the cake. I will audit presents, tag them as suspicious, and liberate them." "Is liberate code for stuffing them into the rolling suitcase shaped like an ethical dilemma?" "Correct. It moos when overfilled, which is both a warning and a lifestyle." "Molly, is there any universe where we do not traumatize toddlers and inflatables?" "Absolutely. We leave each child a replacement present: a coupon for one future rainbow." Bill tested the suitcase moo; it answered with a disapproving cow tone that suggested boundaries. Molly kissed the handle like a saint of larceny. "Redeemable when? During the rainy season between my mistakes and your schematics?" "Redeemable immediately; I packed a pocket rainbow. It hums in the key of confetti." "I hope it drowns out the clown. Clown immunity to shame is their superpower." "We will befriend the clown. I speak fluent honk. He will cover our retreat." "Your plan depends on bilingual honking and citrus vests. This is why I adore you." A breeze carried frosting, helium, and the distinct rubber prophecy of balloons waiting to squeal their truths. "Focus your adoration on logistics. Doorway entry at precisely when the macarena eats attention." "So we surf the chaotic tide of small elbows, then pivot to the gift table." "Pivot, pirouette, present appraisal, suitcase moo, rainbow chime, clown honk, magician despair." "And we exit like legends, chased only by biodegradable glitter and mild disapproval." "Bill, breathe. Think like a festive wind." "I prefer thinking like a responsible tumbleweed with insurance." "Fine. Be insured. I’ll be inevitable." They shared a look that had burglarized eight cities and one disappointing county fair tonight.