Run: 2026-02-16-01KHK9XSGTWMWH2D01RGS2QRW9

The van idled a discreet street away, humming like a cat with secrets, while the sound of squeaky balloons and chaotic cheering leaked from the community hall. "I brought a giant cake box, and absolutely no cake, just pockets." Molly adjusted her velvet mask and peered at the frosting decal on the box. "Good, because nothing distracts a birthday crowd like suspicious bakery geometry." Bill held up a clipboard that said Party Logistics in bubble letters, which he pronounced like a forged passport. "We glide in, compliment the pinata, confiscate the gifts for quality control, and glide out." From the hall, someone tested a microphone, producing a squeal like a bicycle trying to lie. "Remember, if anyone asks, we are the Surprise Unwrapping Consultants." He practiced a solemn nod, the kind that suggested a certificate hung somewhere behind his eyes. "I printed badges with lanyards and a very confident barcode that means nothing." Molly handed him a laminate that gleamed with earnest fraudulence. "We time it during musical chairs; chaos rises, morals sink, wrapping paper sighs." A gust carried confetti to the van window, where it stuck like bright excuses. "Also, I brought decoy gifts filled with broccoli and pamphlets about sharing." Bill blinked, then grinned, a grin with hinges. "Ethical misdirection: we steal, but we also improve diets and reading habits." A clown waddled past the alley mouth, juggling three oranges and one evident life choice. "Okay, blueprint review: door, foyer, cake table, gift mountain, emergency exit shaped like triumph." She unrolled a napkin sketch where arrows marched like tiny ambitions. "What about the magician?" They both paused, picturing doves, smoke, and the unique hazard of a disappointed rabbit. "I bribed him to distract with an infinite scarf; infinity takes at least three minutes." Bill relaxed, then tightened again as a drumroll thumped from inside. "And the lookout?" Molly pointed to a helium dolphin bobbing at the window like an informant who forgot how to whisper. "If the dolphin bounces twice, danger; three times, cake; perpetually, we improvise." It bounced once, as though practicing. "Masks on, consultant voices ready, and remember to applaud ironically yet sincerely." They stepped out, their shadows holding breath while the hall door sighed them in. "Hello, jubilant citizens; we are here to optimize surprise throughput and ribbon ergonomics." Parents blinked at the badges, which sparkled with bureaucratic audacity. "Please maintain steady clapping while we evaluate the structural integrity of generosity." Children, already sticky with destiny, screamed amiably and circled the cake like asteroids. "Commencing audit: big bows to the left, suspiciously light parcels to me." A toddler offered Molly a sticker, deputizing her with glitter authority. Bill bowed theatrically. "Phase two: we thank the hosts profusely, then relocate generosity into our professionally insured vehicle." "Yes, and for transparency, we promise a full report featuring charts, arrows, and a heartfelt bibliography." "If caught, smile, cite subsection joy-dot-seven, and offer complimentary broccoli to management." "Bill, you are a lighthouse made of laminated excuses and impeccable timing."