Run: 2026-02-16-01KHKAEEF9J71BYH5TRZ551SBD

Molly: I cannot believe our biggest score involves glitter and sheet cake. Bill: Crime has to evolve; I'm pivoting to party logistics. Molly: We're not planners, Bill. We're pirates, but with better shoes. Bill: Then consider this a treasure hunt, and the X is a bouncy castle. Molly: The castle squeaks. Subtlety squeaks back. Bill: Distraction first. I do a tragic balloon giraffe; hearts melt; gift table loosens. Molly: Your last balloon animal looked like a question mark with allergies. Bill: Mystery breeds generosity. Molly: And suspicion. Bill: Fine. You charm the toddlers; I'll wrangle the wrapping paper. Molly: Toddlers can smell fear and raisins. Bill: I smell like neither. I exude wholesome chaos. Molly: The parents? Bill: We blend—smile, nod, compliment the cake density. Molly: Complimenting density sounds like flirting with granite. Bill: Granite is dependable. Molly: Presents are guarded by an aunt with elbows like traffic cones. Bill: I respect elbows. I also respect decoys. We move decoy boxes; real ones follow. Molly: You're proposing reverse Santa, but with worse cardio. Bill: Accurate. Also, I brought name tags. I'm "Uncle Who." Molly: I'm "Cousin Probably." Bill: Confidence is key. Never run; just stroll with purpose and streamers. Molly: And if karaoke starts? Bill: We duet, bow, and exit with harmonized parcels. Molly: Bold. Petty. Festive. Let's mourn our dignity afterward. Silence.