Run: 2026-02-16-01KHKAMJY4R78RZS4A2A8FZ8CT

Porch smelled of cake glitter. Molly: Do you smell frosting or is that my conscience? Bill: Frosting, definitely frosting. Conscience is on vacation with a napkin. Molly: We go in, scoop presents, exit before anyone notices the missing chaos. Bill: Scoop? Like an ice cream scoop? Because I brought a spoon and it's terrible for locks. Molly: No locks, Bill. We distract with balloon animals and a kazoo solo. Bill: A kazoo? You trust my kazooing abilities for a felony? Molly: I trust your kazoo to clear a room. Also, your juggling leaves people speechless. Bill: My juggling is a public service. Kids will clap and forget their own birthdays. Molly: Perfect. You play the sad clown, I play the generous fairy pretending to misplace magic dust. Bill: And the parents will follow us to return the 'dust', leaving piles of gifts unattended? Molly: They'll follow like kids to a bubble machine. Then we politely wrap everything and slide it into our bag. Bill: Politely wrap? Since when did you learn etiquette? Molly: Since reading three etiquette blogs during lunch. Also, scissors are for ribbon, not eyebrows. Bill: Final question: cake? Molly: Cake is collateral. We each take one slice.