Run: 2026-02-20-01KHXQEVFYF0DX7FTTQHBPJY5N

Molly adjusted the glittery unicorn horn strapped to her forehead and squinted at the inflatable bounce house sagging under the weight of a dozen sugar-crazed five-year-olds. "You’re sure this is the target? Because I’m pretty sure we just robbed a daycare by accident." Bill, resplendent in a rainbow wig and a T-shirt that read *World’s Okayest Dad*, scratched his chin. "Positive. Intel says the birthday kid’s dad is some tech bro who ‘disrupts’ things. Probably bought his kid a pony or a small country. We’re not leaving until we’ve got a duffel bag full of loot that could fund a small coup." Molly side-eyed the piñata shaped like a cartoon fox. "That thing’s stuffed with candy, not gold bars. And I’m pretty sure that kid over there just peed in the ball pit." "Details," Bill said, waving a hand. "We’re not here for the ambiance. We’re here for the *presents*." He nodded toward a folding table groaning under a mountain of wrapped boxes, each one bigger than the last. "Look at that haul. That’s not just a new bike—that’s a *bike with a built-in espresso machine*." Molly sighed. "You don’t even drink coffee." "I’m thinking ahead. Resale value." Bill pulled a walkie-talkie from his fanny pack and pressed the button. "Alright, team, phase one: blend in. Molly, you’re on distraction duty. I’ll handle the heavy lifting." Molly groaned. "I *hate* distraction duty. Last time, I had to pretend to be a mime for forty-five minutes. Do you know how hard it is to mime ‘I’m not stealing your wallet’ convincingly?" "Just bat your eyelashes and ask where the bathroom is. Works every time." Bill adjusted his wig, which had slipped sideways, giving him the appearance of a disgruntled clown. "I’ll be the ‘cool uncle’ who ‘helps’ with the presents. By which I mean I’ll be the guy stuffing them into a garbage bag while everyone’s watching you do the Macarena." Molly crossed her arms. "I don’t know the Macarena." "Then improvise. Flail. Look like you’re having a medical emergency. I don’t care, just keep eyes on you." Bill patted her shoulder. "And for the love of all that’s holy, don’t let them give you cake. Last time, you got frosting in your hair and spent the next three days smelling like vanilla and regret." Molly scowled. "That was *one time*. And it was *good* cake." "Focus, Molly. We’ve got a job to do." Bill glanced at his watch. "The magician’s about to start. That’s our window. Go be *charming*." Molly muttered under her breath as she waded into the chaos, past a toddler wielding a juice box like a weapon. She sidled up to a harried-looking mom and flashed her most disarming smile. "Hi! I’m, uh, the party planner’s assistant. Do you know where the—" "The what now?" The mom blinked at her. Molly’s smile didn’t waver. "The *entertainment*? I was told there’d be a petting zoo?" The mom’s eyes widened. "A *petting zoo*? Oh my god, the *allergies*—" Molly didn’t wait to hear the rest. She bolted toward the magician, who was currently attempting to pull a rabbit out of a hat with the enthusiasm of a man who’d just realized he’d left the oven on. "Excuse me! Sir! The kids are *losing it*! They need *more*!" The magician, sweating under his sequined cape, nodded frantically. "I—I only have so many tricks—" "Then *improvise*!" Molly hissed, shoving him toward the crowd. She turned just in time to see Bill hoist a gift-wrapped box the size of a microwave into his arms. He gave her a thumbs-up. Molly groaned. "That’s not a present, that’s a *coffin*." Bill grinned. "Relax. It’s just a drone. Probably." A shrill voice cut through the noise. "HEY! THAT’S MY PRESENT!" Molly and Bill froze. A tiny girl in a princess dress stood there, hands on her hips, glaring up at them like a miniature mob boss. Bill cleared his throat. "Uh. Happy birthday?" The girl’s eyes narrowed. "You’re not my uncle." Molly dropped to one knee, her unicorn horn wobbling. "Sweetie, we’re *friends* of your uncle. He sent us to *hide* your presents so the bad guys don’t get them." The girl considered this. "Like a treasure hunt?" "Exactly like a treasure hunt," Molly said, nodding vigorously. "And if you help us, we’ll give you…" She glanced at Bill, panicked. Bill rummaged in his fanny pack and pulled out a half-melted lollipop. "A *magic* lollipop." The girl snatched it. "Deal." She turned and marched toward the bounce house. "But if this is a trick, I’m telling my dad. He *disrupts* people for a living." Molly and Bill exchanged a look. "Abort?" Molly whispered. Bill hefted the drone box. "Not a chance. We’re committed now." And with that, they made a break for the exit, leaving behind a trail of glitter, chaos, and one very suspicious five-year-old.