Run: 2026-02-20-01KHYAAF7DTWG2BGK9BE4TXA2S

“Okay, so let’s go over this again, Bill. For the last time.” Molly tapped a chipped mug against a greasy diner tabletop. “No improvising. Absolutely none.” Bill slurped his coffee, leaving a brown mustache. “Improvisation is my middle name, Mol.” “It’s Arthur. Your middle name is Arthur.” “Details, details. Point is, I’m a quick thinker. A magpie, drawn to shiny opportunities.” “The shiny opportunity is a mountain of Paw Patrol backpacks and a remote control car shaped like a dinosaur. It's not exactly the crown jewels.” “Don’t underestimate the resale value of a limited-edition Skye plushie. Those things are going for a fortune on eBay.” Bill winked. “Alright, alright. No improv. Walk me through it.” “Right. Six-year-old Timmy’s birthday. We go in disguised as… what did we decide?” “A very enthusiastic clown and a slightly disgruntled balloon animal artist.” “Disgruntled is key, Bill. You look like you haven’t slept in a week. Authentic artistry requires suffering.” Bill sighed dramatically. “My soul *is* suffering, Molly. The things I do for a cut of Timmy's loot.” “It’s not loot, it’s…gifts. And it’s for Reginald. Remember Reginald?” “The ferret? Yes, Reginald needs a new heated bed. A very expensive heated bed, apparently.” “He gets cold easily. Alright. We scope out the gift table. Distraction is paramount. You’re in charge of the distraction.” “Me? Why me? You're the master of disguise!” “Because you have a regrettable knack for accidentally setting off fire alarms. I need you to *not* set off the fire alarm.” “Hey! That was one time! And it was a faulty smoke detector!” “It was because you were trying to juggle flaming bowling pins.” “They were plastic! And it looked impressive!” “Focus, Bill. The distraction. You’re going to ‘accidentally’ release all the balloons. Big, colourful chaos. Everyone looks up. I grab the gifts. We’re out.” “Release all the balloons? That feels… dramatic.” “It is dramatic. It's also effective. And it'll give the little tykes something to talk about besides my obviously fake nose.” “What if they catch us?” “They won’t. I’ve practiced my ‘helpful party entertainer’ face. It’s award-winning. You just look miserable and hold a lot of twisted balloon dogs.” “Miserable is easy. What if the parents are suspicious?” “Play dumb. ‘Oh, these delightful children! So much energy!’ and then mutter something about wanting a nap. People will assume you’re just a very tired artist.” “And the dog? Timmy’s got a golden retriever. He looks…alert.” “We’re not stealing from the dog, Bill. We’re stealing from the *children*. Though, if he tries to bite you, run.” “Right. Balloons, misery, no fire alarms. And Reginald gets a heated bed.” Bill finished his coffee. "This is a terrible plan." Molly grinned. “That’s why it’ll work.”