Run: 2026-02-24-01KJ8X4DEX2QQVENA3MW94CRZN

Molly spread the hand-drawn map across the hood of their rusted van and tapped it with a stubby finger. "The target is a six-year-old's birthday party," she said. "Pink balloons on the mailbox. Security is a golden retriever named Biscuit." Bill stared at her. "Molly. We are going to steal presents from a child." "We are going to redistribute gifts from a child whose parents clearly have more money than sense. There's a bouncy castle, Bill. A bouncy castle on a Tuesday." "That's not a crime." "It's offensive is what it is." She pointed to a crude rectangle on the map. "Present table is here. The party runs two to four. We go in at three fifteen when everyone's doing cake." Bill leaned against the van. "And how do we get past Biscuit?" "I have string cheese." "That's your whole plan? String cheese?" "It's very good string cheese." Bill rubbed his face with both hands. "What are we wearing? We can't just walk in looking like this." "I'm glad you asked." Molly reached into the back of the van and produced two enormous foam suits. "We are going as Chip and Dale." "The chipmunks." "The chipmunks." "Molly, those are just brown barrels with ears glued on." "They're artisanal." "One of them is leaking stuffing." "That one's yours. Now listen." She grabbed his arm and pulled him back to the map. "We go in, we mingle, we compliment someone's kid, we locate the presents, and when the cake comes out we load everything into the duffel bags we've hidden inside the suits." Bill blinked slowly. "Inside the suits." "Roomy suits." "And nobody is going to notice two enormous chipmunks waddling out the back gate carrying lumpy bags?" "Kids love chipmunks, Bill. They won't say a word. They'll think it's part of the entertainment." "What if a parent asks who hired us?" "We say the other parent did." "That's genius." "Thank you." "I mean that genuinely. That's actually quite clever." Molly straightened up and crossed her arms, looking pleased with herself. "I've been in this business fifteen years. You think I don't know how a birthday party operates?" "You absolutely do not know how a birthday party operates." "I have YouTube." Bill looked at the map again, then at the foam suits, then at the small cooler presumably containing the string cheese. He exhaled very slowly through his nose. "If Biscuit bites me," he said, "I'm keeping the presents." "Biscuit won't bite you. You're a chipmunk. Dogs love chipmunks." "Dogs chase chipmunks." "In a playful way." Bill picked up his suit and held it at arm's length. A small cloud of stuffing drifted to the gravel. He looked at Molly. Molly looked at him with the calm, absolute confidence of someone who had never once been right about anything but remained entirely unbothered by that fact. "Fine," Bill said. "But I'm driving us home."