Run: 2026-02-25-01KJ95E0TRXG0V6EMX2VJ4PZTP

Run Details

Duration:
25.2s
Cost:
$0.011738
Provider:
Google AI Studio

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4413" name="Silas Blackwood" aliases="Silas, Si, the Spymaster" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Mentor"> <eyeColor>hazel</eyeColor> <hair>grey-streaked auburn</hair> <height>6'1"</height> <age>58</age> <beard>neatly trimmed, matching his grey-streaked auburn hair</beard> <limp>slight limp in his left leg from an old knee injury</limp> <signetRing>silver signet ring, always worn on his right hand</signetRing> <description>Silas is a retired intelligence operative turned bar owner. He carries himself with quiet authority.</description> <backstory>Former MI6 field agent who retired after a botched operation in Prague left him with a permanent knee injury. He opened "The Raven's Nest" bar in Soho as a front for his network of contacts.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the literary fiction genre. Two old friends who haven't seen each other in years run into each other unexpectedly at a bar. One of them has changed significantly. Through their conversation and the tension between who they were and who they've become, reveal the weight of time and unspoken regret. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The neon green sign of The Raven’s Nest pulsed a rhythmic beat against the perpetual gloom of the Soho alley. Rory pushed through the heavy oak door, the clang of the bell above her head a familiar greeting. The scent of aged wood, stale beer, and something faintly metallic – Silas’s particular brand of cleaning fluid, perhaps – settled around her like a worn blanket. Fatigue gnawed at her shoulders. Another shift done, another round of navigating London’s labyrinthine streets with a thermal bag strapped to her back. Silas, a shadow in the dim light behind the bar, looked up from wiping down a glass. His grey-streaked auburn hair caught the faint glow from a sconce, the silver signet ring on his right hand glinting. He offered a slight nod, a silent acknowledgement of her presence, of her return. The bar was populated by the usual evening eccentrics, their conversations a low thrum against the backdrop of an old blues record crooning from hidden speakers. Rory appreciated the anonymity of it, the way she could slip in and out, a ghost in her own life, most nights. She moved to her usual stool at the far end of the bar, away from the sporadic clamour of laughter near the entrance. "Pint of something dark, Silas," she said, resting her elbows on the cool, worn wood. Her bright blue eyes scanned the room, a habit picked up from her days delivering, scanning for obstacles, for trouble. Old maps decorated the walls, intricate lines leading nowhere she knew, black-and-white photographs of forgotten landscapes and stern-faced individuals watching over the patrons. It was a place for secrets, for quiet exchanges. Her gaze snagged on a figure tucked into a booth near the arched window, half-obscured by a potted fern. He sat alone, a glass of amber liquid cradled in his hand. Something about the set of his shoulders, the precise angle of his head, pricked at a long-dormant memory. He was dressed impeccably, a dark suit tailored to a lean frame, a crisp white shirt. Too crisp for The Raven’s Nest, too polished. As he shifted, turning slightly to sip his drink, the light caught his profile, and Rory’s breath hitched. No. It couldn’t be. Her heart knocked against her ribs, a frantic bird trapped in a cage. The man turned further, his eyes sweeping the room, stopping, then narrowing, before settling on her. A slow, almost predatory smile stretched across his lips. Leo. Not the Leo she remembered, not the boy with perpetually ink-stained fingers and a crooked grin, whose t-shirts always had a new tear at the shoulder from another adventurous climb up the old quarry wall. This man was a sharpened edge, all angles and expensive fabric. His hair, once a shaggy brown, was now cut short, precise, artfully styled. The soft, earnest eyes she’d known were now hard, glinting with an unsettling shrewdness. It was like looking at a photograph of someone familiar, but knowing a stranger had stepped into their skin. "Rory?" His voice, when he finally spoke, was a low rumble, richer than she remembered. He pushed himself out of the booth, moving with a controlled ease that was utterly alien. His gaze locked onto hers, a flicker of something unreadable passing through his eyes before the polished smile returned. Silas placed a dark ale in front of her, his hazel eyes briefly meeting hers, a silent question lurking there. She managed a weak smile, her hand trembling slightly as she reached for the glass. "Leo," she managed, her own voice feeling thin, reedy. "What are you doing here?" As if *she* weren't the one who lived above the bar. He reached them in a few strides, extending a hand. His grip was firm, cool, the kind that spoke of gym memberships and well-manicured nails. Hers, still faintly smelling of fried rice and the synthetic leather of her delivery bag, felt clumsy in comparison. "Small world, isn't it?" he said, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. "Heard you might be kicking about London. Doing well, I hope?" Rory pulled her hand back, her scar on her wrist a tiny, insistent throb. "I'm fine. This is... unexpected." "Indeed." He gestured vaguely at the bar stool next to her. "Mind if I join you for a moment? For old times' sake." She couldn't deny him. She hadn't seen him in seven years, not since she’d left Cardiff in a blur of panicked decisions and a train ticket bought with her last remaining cash. He slipped onto the stool beside her, a subtle shift in the bar’s atmosphere, as if a spotlight had suddenly glared on their corner. Silas moved away to serve another customer, a silent acknowledgement of her need for space. "So, London," Leo said, his eyes still assessing her, taking in her practical jeans, her worn hoodie, the faint smudges of bike grease on her wrist. "Last I heard, you were set on law. How’s that going?" Rory took a long gulp of her ale, the bitter taste grounding her. "Life takes unexpected turns. I'm... working. Living." She avoided specifics. The thought of telling him about the Golden Empress, about her quiet, solitary existence, felt like a concession she wasn't willing to make. Not to *this* Leo. "I can tell," he murmured, his gaze sweeping over her again. There was no judgement in his tone, but something else, something calculating. "Still the same Rory, though. Fought your way out, didn't you?" The unspoken weight of that last phrase hung heavy in the air. *Fought your way out* of Cardiff. *Fought your way out* of Evan. He’d known. They all had. But Leo had been different. Had been kind. "Something like that," she said, turning her glass in her hands. "You've... changed." It felt inadequate, a pathetic observation. He was a different person. An entirely different species. He chuckled, a low sound that grated on her ears. "Had to, didn't I? Sticking around Cardiff like a lost puppy wasn't doing anyone any favours. Got to make your own luck." He gestured vaguely at his suit. "Different circles now, Rory. Bigger game." "Bigger game?" She remembered his old dreams of becoming a graphic novelist, sketching fantastical creatures in the margins of his textbooks. The ink-stained fingers. "Oh, you know." He waved a dismissive hand. "Property. Investments. Things that actually matter." His eyes darted around The Raven’s Nest. "Wouldn't have pegged you for a regular in a place like this. Always thought you’d be more... high-rise penthouse, power suit." The irony almost made her laugh. "I live upstairs," she said simply. His eyebrows arched, a genuine surprise flickering in his hard eyes. "Really? Above this... charming establishment?" He sounded like he was trying to be polite, but the slight curl of his lip betrayed him. "Well, that's certainly a turn up for the books." "It's home," Rory said, a defensive edge creeping into her voice. "It’s safe." The word 'safe' seemed to hang, vibrating between them, an invisible barrier. He thought of Cardiff, surely, of the last few months she'd spent there, trapped and slowly suffocating. "Safe is good," he said, and for a moment, a trace of the old Leo softened his features, a ghost of concern in his gaze. It vanished as quickly as it appeared. "Myself, I never could settle for 'safe'. Always wanted more, you remember?" She did. She remembered long nights in cramped student flats, him sketching caricatures of their lecturers, talking about leaving Cardiff for bigger things, a wider world. Back then, "bigger things" meant an art scholarship in Bristol. Now, it meant... what? "What brings you to London, then, Leo?" she asked, turning the conversation away from herself. "Business?" "Always business, Rory." He took a slow sip of his own drink, Scotch by the colour of it. "A meeting. Exploring new opportunities." He paused, a glint in his eye. "Actually, I was hoping to track *you* down. Heard a rumour you were around. Had a loose end to tie up." Her stomach plunged. Loose end? What could he possibly mean? Had he been looking for her? Had Evan sent him? The thought sent a cold shiver down her spine. "A loose end?" "Just... the past," he said, his voice dropping, becoming almost conspiratorial. "We never really said goodbye, did we? One day, you were just... gone." "It was complicated," she muttered, remembering the fear, the desperation. The shame. "Complicated," he echoed. "It was a mess, Rory. After you left... things changed. Evan, well, he dug himself deeper. Ended up in some real trouble. Everyone scattered." Her gaze dropped to her crescent-shaped scar on her wrist. A physical reminder of Evan’s cruelty. "I had to go." "I know," he said, but his tone lacked true understanding, instead carrying an air of detached observation. "Always the practical one, weren't you? See an exit, take it. No looking back. Guess that’s why you’re still you, and I’m..." He trailed off, gesturing again to his expensive suit, to the bar around them. "And I’m here. Finding new ways to make things work." There was an undertone to his words, a subtle accusation mixed with a strange kind of pride. Like he’d thrived in the wreckage she’d escaped. Or perhaps, he was hinting that she'd left him behind. "What do you mean, 'make things work'?" The question slipped out before she could stop it. He smiled again, a flash of white teeth. "Just... adapting. The world is a tough place, Rory. You learn to play the game, or you get played. I chose the former. Sometimes you have to get your hands a little dirty to keep them clean." The vague pronouncements, the cryptic smiles, they unnerved her. This wasn’t the Leo who’d once drawn goofy comic strips that made her laugh until her sides ached. This was someone sharp, calculating, with an edge that felt dangerous. "You look good, though," she offered, trying to break the growing tension. "Prosperous." He inclined his head, accepting the compliment. "Hard work. Long hours. Never thought I’d be trading in my sketchbooks for spreadsheets, but here we are. It’s a good life, Rory. You should try it sometime. Cardiff's moving up, by the way. Lots of development. You wouldn't recognize it. Might even be a few opportunities for you." His implication hung unspoken: a return. A chance to start over, perhaps under his wing. The thought made her skin crawl. Go back to Cardiff? To the ghost of Evan, to the memories of fear and weakness? And to this new, unsettling Leo? Never. "London suits me," she said, firmly. "I’m happy where I am." He raised his Scotch in a silent toast. "To happiness, then. However you find it." His eyes lingered on her for a moment too long, a strange mix of regret and something akin to pity. Or perhaps, that was just her imagination, projecting her own feelings onto him. The blues music on the speaker changed, a mournful trumpet wailing into the smoky air. Rory felt a sudden, desperate urge to escape. The conversation had peeled back layers she’d carefully constructed, revealing the raw edges of a past she worked hard to forget. And Leo, the boy who’d once been a comforting presence, was now just another sharp reminder of everything she’d fled. "Well," he said, eventually, pushing himself off the stool. "It was... illuminating, catching up. Truly." His smile was genuine this time, or perhaps, just a better imitation. "I should let you get back to... whatever it is you do here." He glanced at Silas, who was still serving drinks with a practiced air of detachment. "And I have an early start tomorrow." "Right." Rory stood too, feeling awkward, unbalanced. "It was... good to see you, Leo." The lie tasted bitter on her tongue. It hadn't been good. It had been a jarring, unsettling reminder of how much time had passed, and how wide the chasm between them had become. The old Leo was gone, swallowed by ambition and something colder, harder. And maybe, she realised, a part of the old Rory, the one he once knew, had died with her escape too. He paused at the entrance, turning back. "You take care, Rory," he said, the words echoing in the sudden silence of the bar as the blues track ended. Then he walked out, and the heavy door swung shut, leaving behind only the lingering scent of expensive cologne and the ghost of a shared past. Rory sank back onto her stool, draining her glass. Silas was back in front of her, his brow furrowed slightly. "Everything alright, Rory?" he asked, his voice low. She met his gaze, her bright blue eyes reflecting a sudden overwhelming weariness. "Just sorting out old ghosts, Silas," she said. "Just sorting them out."
created_at"2026-02-25T01:08:21.985Z" 2/25/2026, 1:08:21 AM
model"google/gemini-2.5-flash"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency1351
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time25156
tokens_prompt867
tokens_completion4279
native_tokens_prompt842
native_tokens_completion4594
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning1687
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"STOP"
usage0.0117376
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"16c01e26-9b91-4d22-b487-ed35634b017d"
is_byokfalse
latency1351
model_permaslug"google/gemini-2.5-flash"
provider_name"Google AI Studio"
status200
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1771981701-yspEjJA8ZcKHPoTCf0AE"
upstream_id(null)
total_cost0.0117376
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Google AI Studio"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
68.42% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags38
adverbTagCount5
adverbTags
0"He gestured vaguely [vaguely]"
1"He gestured vaguely [vaguely]"
2"His eyes darted around [around]"
3"she said simply [simply]"
4"Rory stood too [too]"
dialogueSentences63
tagDensity0.603
leniency1
rawRatio0.132
effectiveRatio0.132
74.21% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2133
totalAiIsmAdverbs11
found
0
adverb"slightly"
count3
1
adverb"utterly"
count1
2
adverb"suddenly"
count1
3
adverb"really"
count2
4
adverb"slowly"
count1
5
adverb"quickly"
count1
6
adverb"carefully"
count1
7
adverb"truly"
count1
highlights
0"slightly"
1"utterly"
2"suddenly"
3"really"
4"slowly"
5"quickly"
6"carefully"
7"truly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (16 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
0"Blackwood"
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
15.61% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2133
totalAiIsms36
found
0
word"pulsed"
count1
1
word"rhythmic"
count1
2
word"gloom"
count1
3
word"familiar"
count2
4
word"navigating"
count1
5
word"glinting"
count2
6
word"scanned"
count1
7
word"scanning"
count1
8
word"intricate"
count1
9
word"flicker"
count1
10
word"unreadable"
count1
11
word"synthetic"
count1
12
word"throb"
count1
13
word"solitary"
count1
14
word"calculating"
count2
15
word"unspoken"
count2
16
word"weight"
count1
17
word"glint"
count1
18
word"stomach"
count1
19
word"down her spine"
count1
20
word"echoed"
count1
21
word"reminder"
count3
22
word"tension"
count1
23
word"implication"
count1
24
word"firmly"
count1
25
word"constructed"
count1
26
word"comforting"
count1
27
word"echoing"
count1
28
word"silence"
count1
29
word"furrowed"
count1
highlights
0"pulsed"
1"rhythmic"
2"gloom"
3"familiar"
4"navigating"
5"glinting"
6"scanned"
7"scanning"
8"intricate"
9"flicker"
10"unreadable"
11"synthetic"
12"throb"
13"solitary"
14"calculating"
15"unspoken"
16"weight"
17"glint"
18"stomach"
19"down her spine"
20"echoed"
21"reminder"
22"tension"
23"implication"
24"firmly"
25"constructed"
26"comforting"
27"echoing"
28"silence"
29"furrowed"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"hung in the air"
count1
highlights
0"hung heavy in the air"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences146
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences146
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences168
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen55
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans5
markdownWords11
totalWords2135
ratio0.005
matches
0"she"
1"this"
2"Fought your way out"
3"Fought your way out"
4"you"
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions24
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions51
wordCount1656
uniqueNames14
maxNameDensity0.6
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Raven3
Nest3
Soho1
Silas6
London1
Rory10
Leo10
Cardiff5
Golden1
Empress1
Evan4
Bristol1
Scotch2
Had3
persons
0"Raven"
1"Silas"
2"Rory"
3"Leo"
4"Evan"
5"Had"
places
0"Soho"
1"London"
2"Cardiff"
3"Bristol"
globalScore1
windowScore1
62.28% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences114
glossingSentenceCount4
matches
0"not quite reaching his eyes"
1"felt like a concession she wasn't willi"
2"sounded like he was trying to be polite, b"
3"something akin to pity"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount2135
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount1
totalSentences168
matches
0"hinting that she'd"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs51
mean41.86
std24.94
cv0.596
sampleLengths
088
199
290
391
44
538
61
792
850
935
1025
1168
1219
1323
1471
1537
1650
1734
1837
1928
2044
2124
2242
2312
2443
2513
2673
2740
2816
2951
3032
3124
3212
3327
3420
3563
3635
3716
3845
3938
4013
4171
4229
4311
4448
4564
4662
4780
4854
4928
98.05% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount3
totalSentences146
matches
0"was populated"
1"was dressed"
2"was gone"
72.29% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount5
totalVerbs261
matches
0"was like looking"
1"wasn't willing"
2"was trying"
3"was hinting"
4"was still serving"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount2
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences1
totalSentences168
ratio0.006
matches
0"The scent of aged wood, stale beer, and something faintly metallic – Silas’s particular brand of cleaning fluid, perhaps – settled around her like a worn blanket."
97.28% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1624
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount70
adverbRatio0.04310344827586207
lyAdverbCount21
lyAdverbRatio0.01293103448275862
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences168
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences168
mean12.71
std8.29
cv0.652
sampleLengths
020
118
227
35
418
517
620
714
826
922
1023
1115
1220
1323
149
1519
1612
1718
1816
198
2018
211
223
2313
2416
259
261
2735
2811
2913
3014
3119
3215
3316
3419
3520
3615
379
3816
3910
4015
4119
4213
4311
4414
455
4611
4712
484
4928
60.91% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats11
diversityRatio0.40476190476190477
totalSentences168
uniqueOpeners68
49.38% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount2
totalSentences135
matches
0"Too crisp for The Raven’s"
1"Then he walked out, and"
ratio0.015
15.56% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount69
totalSentences135
matches
0"His grey-streaked auburn hair caught"
1"He offered a slight nod,"
2"She moved to her usual"
3"she said, resting her elbows"
4"Her bright blue eyes scanned"
5"It was a place for"
6"Her gaze snagged on a"
7"He sat alone, a glass"
8"He was dressed impeccably, a"
9"It couldn’t be."
10"Her heart knocked against her"
11"His hair, once a shaggy"
12"It was like looking at"
13"His voice, when he finally"
14"He pushed himself out of"
15"His gaze locked onto hers,"
16"She managed a weak smile,"
17"she managed, her own voice"
18"He reached them in a"
19"His grip was firm, cool,"
ratio0.511
56.30% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount109
totalSentences135
matches
0"The neon green sign of"
1"Rory pushed through the heavy"
2"The scent of aged wood,"
3"Fatigue gnawed at her shoulders."
4"Another shift done, another round"
5"Silas, a shadow in the"
6"His grey-streaked auburn hair caught"
7"He offered a slight nod,"
8"The bar was populated by"
9"Rory appreciated the anonymity of"
10"She moved to her usual"
11"she said, resting her elbows"
12"Her bright blue eyes scanned"
13"It was a place for"
14"Her gaze snagged on a"
15"He sat alone, a glass"
16"Something about the set of"
17"He was dressed impeccably, a"
18"It couldn’t be."
19"Her heart knocked against her"
ratio0.807
100.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount3
totalSentences135
matches
0"As if *she* weren't the"
1"Now, it meant..."
2"To the ghost of Evan,"
ratio0.022
70.22% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences59
technicalSentenceCount6
matches
0"The man turned further, his eyes sweeping the room, stopping, then narrowing, before settling on her."
1"His grip was firm, cool, the kind that spoke of gym memberships and well-manicured nails."
2"He slipped onto the stool beside her, a subtle shift in the bar’s atmosphere, as if a spotlight had suddenly glared on their corner."
3"She remembered long nights in cramped student flats, him sketching caricatures of their lecturers, talking about leaving Cardiff for bigger things, a wider worl…"
4"This was someone sharp, calculating, with an edge that felt dangerous."
5"And Leo, the boy who’d once been a comforting presence, was now just another sharp reminder of everything she’d fled."
32.89% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags38
uselessAdditionCount7
matches
0"he murmured, his gaze sweeping over her again"
1"Rory said, a defensive edge creeping into her voice"
2"he said, his voice dropping, becoming almost conspiratorial"
3"he said, but his tone lacked true understanding, instead carrying an air of detached observation"
4"she offered, trying to break the growing tension"
5"she said, firmly"
6"he asked, his voice low"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags17
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"he murmured (murmur)"
1"she muttered (mutter)"
dialogueSentences63
tagDensity0.27
leniency0.54
rawRatio0.118
effectiveRatio0.063
82.4471%