Run: 2026-03-06-01KK1HJBTGPHDJN281YZNHZXVV

Run Details

Duration:
1m 23s
Cost:
$0.050395
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the horror genre. A character is alone in a strange, isolated place at night. They came here for a reason, but something feels off from the moment they arrive. The wrongness builds slowly — sounds that shouldn't be there, things that move at the edge of vision, a growing certainty that they are not alone. Build tension through restraint, not through gore. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for the character and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
By the time Aurora reached the outer edge of Richmond Park, the city had fallen away so completely it felt less like distance and more like a trick. London still existed somewhere behind her—streets slick with drizzle, buses hissing at stops, laughter leaking from pub doors—but here the night had teeth. The wind moved through the grass in long, secretive strokes. Bare branches clicked together overhead. Even the path looked less certain than it had by day, thinning into darkness as if the park had begun to reconsider letting her in. She stopped beneath a dead-looking sycamore and checked her phone for the third time in ten minutes. No signal. Of course. Her thumb hovered over Eva’s last message anyway. You do not go into weird enchanted murder woods alone, Rory. Rory had nearly smiled when she read it in the flat. Nearly. But the pendant had gone warm against her chest again, that deep crimson stone thrumming like a second pulse, and that had stripped the humor out of everything. It had been doing that for two days now—small flares of heat whenever she passed mirrors after dark, whenever the air turned suddenly cold, whenever she caught, in the corner of her eye, the impression of a doorway where no doorway stood. Tonight the warmth had sharpened into urgency. Not constant. Not random. Pulling. Toward the grove. She tucked the phone into her jacket pocket and started walking again. The standing stones were farther in than she remembered. The first time she had found the grove, she had not been alone, and the path to it had seemed almost eager to reveal itself. Tonight the park resisted. Brambles snagged at her jeans. Mud sucked at her trainers. Trees massed thickly where she did not remember trees being, their trunks black with damp, the bark shining like wet skin. Her flashlight beam jittered ahead of her, too small for the dark pressing in on either side. The pendant shifted under her shirt, a coin of heat resting just below her collarbone. “All right,” she muttered, mostly to hear a human voice. “Point taken.” Her own words dropped into the night and vanished. Then, after a beat, something in the trees to her left made the same cadence back. Not words. Not exactly. Just a shape of sound that rose and fell where her voice had. Rory stopped. The wind moved. Grass hissed. Far off, something barked—a deer, maybe. She listened until the silence began to feel performative, too clean to trust. “Fox,” she said quietly, though she did not believe it. She kept going. When the standing stones finally appeared, they did not emerge so much as assemble themselves out of shadow: pale uprights around the mouth of the clearing, ancient oak pillars weathered into blunt, hulking forms. She knew them on sight and still felt her stomach tighten. They stood in a rough circle, taller than any man, their surfaces furred with moss silvered by moonlight. The grove lay beyond them, deceptively open, a patch of impossible summer in the middle of winter-dark parkland. Wildflowers spread across the clearing in a soft, low riot of color—bluebells, foxgloves, buttercups, things she could not name. Their scent hung thick in the cold air, sweet enough to verge on rotten. In the center, a broad ash tree lifted white limbs into the night sky. The place should have felt beautiful. It did, in a way. That was part of the problem. Rory stepped between two stones. At once the world changed. The air went still. Not calmer—still. The wind ceased so abruptly it was like walking into glass. The sounds of the park dropped away behind her. No distant traffic. No rustle of branches. No bark of fox or deer. Her own breathing turned loud. The beam of her flashlight seemed weaker, swallowed by the clearing before it reached the tree line. The pendant burned hot enough to make her hiss and pull it free from under her shirt. It hung from its silver chain in her gloved hand, the crimson stone lit from within now, not faintly but with a banked, bloody glow. Warmth pulsed through her palm in small, steady beats. “Hel portal,” she said under her breath, the words sour in her mouth. She looked around the clearing. The flowers nodded gently though no breeze touched her. Shadows lay in wrong places. The ash tree’s trunk cast two of them. Rory stood very still, forcing herself to breathe through the first hard kick of fear. Cool-headed, she reminded herself. Observe first. Panic later. “Isolde?” she called. The name slipped out into the clearing and vanished. No answer came. She took a few steps inward, boots flattening clusters of tiny white blossoms. The grass beneath them felt oddly springy, as if rooted in something softer than soil. The pendant tugged forward, not physically, but with a certainty she could feel all the way up her arm. Toward the far side of the grove, where the flowers grew thickest beneath a stand of hawthorn. The wrongness had been with her from the park’s edge. Here, it sharpened. Not danger exactly. More like misalignment, as if the world had shifted a fraction to the left and left her body behind. Her ears prickled. She had the strange conviction of being watched by someone trying very hard not to blink. She swept the flashlight toward the hawthorn. For an instant she saw nothing but trunks and blossom-heavy branches. Then something pale moved between them. Rory whipped the beam back. Empty. Her mouth had gone dry. “Not doing this,” she said, softer now. She walked anyway. Each step seemed to take longer than it should. The clearing stretched subtly, treacherously. The ash tree remained at her back for too long; the hawthorn never quite got closer. She knew this sort of place could play games with distance. She knew time moved strangely here. Knowing did not help. Her pulse had begun to thud in her throat. A sound came from behind her. Not footsteps. A soft, deliberate crunch, like someone kneeling in frost. Rory turned so fast the pendant chain bit into her fingers. Nothing stood behind her. The ash tree, white and motionless. The flowers. The ring of stones beyond. But the grass where she had just walked lay pressed down in a trail, and halfway along it one patch was depressed more deeply than the rest, as if by the weight of a foot not her own. She stared at it until the flattened grass slowly, carefully, rose again. Her scalp tightened. “All right,” she said, because silence was becoming unbearable. “I’m here for the portal. That’s it. I’m not—” This time the answer came clearly, from somewhere to her right. “That’s it.” Her own voice. Not close. Not far either. It emerged from the dark beneath the hawthorn in a perfect mimicry of her tone, her Cardiff-softened consonants, even the thin thread of irritation she used when she was afraid and refused to admit it. Every muscle in her body locked. No more sounds followed. The grove listened. Rory drew a slow breath through her nose and tasted flowers, damp bark, and underneath it a faint mineral cold like stone cellars and opened graves. She shifted the flashlight to her left hand. Her right closed around the pendant. The small crescent scar on her wrist, old and white against her skin, caught the red gleam and seemed briefly fresh. “If you can copy me,” she said to the dark, very evenly, “you can understand me. Show yourself.” Several heartbeats passed. Then, from behind her this time, almost tenderly: “Show yourself.” The voice had improved. Less echo now. More breath. Rory did not turn at once. Some instinct—animal and absolute—warned her against giving whatever it was the satisfaction. Instead she looked down. The shadow at her feet did not match her stance. Her own silhouette should have slanted long behind her in the moonlight. Instead, a second darkness lay over it, close and attached, with shoulders a little too narrow and a head tilted at a curious angle. As she watched, frozen, that second shadow lifted one arm. Rory’s arms stayed at her sides. She spun. Nothing. But the air behind her stirred at last, a brush of movement against the back of her neck, so intimate she flinched. Cold flooded down her spine. She stumbled away and nearly went to one knee, catching herself on one hand in the flowers. The ground felt warm. Not warm from the season. Warm like skin. She jerked upright. The whole clearing seemed subtly animate now. The flowers did not merely move; they oriented. Their faces had turned toward her in a thousand tiny increments. Foxgloves leaned, bells gaping. Blue petals trembled though the air remained dead calm. The pendant pulsed harder and harder, each beat a stab of heat. It wanted one direction only. Beneath the hawthorn, where the dark pooled thick as ink. Rory knew better than to obey the thing blindly. She also knew she had not come for curiosity. She had come because if there was a Hel breach opening in the grove and she ignored it, things would get worse. Things always got worse. Her fear steadied into a cleaner shape. Useful. “Fine,” she whispered. She raised the flashlight and walked toward the hawthorn. The beam shook despite her effort. Branches knitted overhead, white blossoms glowing sickly in the light. The sweet smell grew stronger, almost fermented. The ground sloped slightly downward though she could have sworn the grove was flat. Between the roots of the trees, the darkness ahead seemed less like shadow and more like depth—an absence with contour. Then she saw it. At the base of the largest hawthorn, half-veiled by hanging branches, stood a narrow vertical slit in the air. Not open exactly. Pressed. Like a seam in fabric straining from pressure on the other side. Frost rimed the grass around it in a perfect crescent. The darkness inside it was absolute, matte and depthless, and every pulse of the Heartstone answered it. A portal, or the beginning of one. Relief came first. Relief was quickly devoured by dread, because someone was already standing in front of it. The figure had its back to her. A woman, by the shape. Shoulder-length black hair. Dark jacket. Narrow build. Five foot six, give or take. Rory stopped breathing. The figure did not move. Moonlight caught the side of its face as it turned, very slowly, toward her. Her own face looked back. Not quite perfectly. The eyes were wrong first: too bright, too reflective, blue gone thin and glassy as winter sky over ice. The skin had the waxen stillness of something assembled from memory rather than flesh. Her mouth curved a second too late, as if smile and intention had failed to meet. “Rory,” it said, and the voice was hers now down to the smallest grain. She took one involuntary step back. The thing’s gaze dropped to the pendant in her hand. Its smile widened by a breath. Behind it, the slit in the air flexed, and from within came a sound like someone inhaling through a long, wet tunnel. “No,” Rory said. The copy tilted its head. She had seen herself make that exact movement in mirrors while considering an argument. Here it became unbearable. “You came,” it said. The flowers around Rory’s ankles bent toward the thing as if listening. Her mind moved fast, cold and clear in the center despite the terror clawing at her ribs. The pendant reacted to Hel portals. Warmth, proximity. Maybe more than that. Given by an unknown benefactor, yes, but not meaningless. Not ornamental. If this thing wanted it, that was information. “You’re not getting this,” she said. The copy’s expression changed. Not anger. Hunger, cleaner than anger and far older. It took one step forward. The clearing answered. Around them, the ring of standing stones groaned softly, ancient wood under strain. Somewhere beyond the hawthorn, something began to circle through the flowers with patient, dragging steps. Not one thing. More than one. She could not see them. She could hear the careful crush of stems, first to her left, then behind, then ahead again. The copy took another step. “Give it to me.” This time the voice was almost hers and almost not. A second speaker moved beneath it, deeper, threaded through with distance. Rory backed toward the ash tree, keeping the flashlight trained on the thing. Her heel caught on a root, and she recovered before she fell. Do not run. Running invited pursuit. Running in a place where distance lied was how you vanished for a day or a century. The dragging steps continued in the dark perimeter of the grove. Once, just once, her light snagged on a shape between the flowers: a white hand laid flat against the ground as if something were pulling itself forward without wanting to rise. When she looked directly, it was gone. The copy smiled again, seeing the flicker in her. “You’re alone,” it said. It was meant to sound comforting. That made it far worse. Rory’s back hit the ash tree. The bark was icy. The pendant burned in her fist, almost unbearable now. The seam in the air behind the copy widened by a hair. Cold rolled out of it in a thin exhale, carrying a smell like old iron and river mud and rooms sealed for years. She thought, absurdly and clearly, of the flat above Silas’ bar. Of the radiator that never worked properly. Of Eva swearing over takeaway cartons. Of ordinary noise, ordinary mess, ordinary life. The world beyond the stones. She would not let this place take her shape and wear it out there. The copy came one step closer. Rory lifted the Heartstone between them. The crimson gem flared. Not glowed—flared, sudden and fierce, a clot of red light flooding the hawthorn shadows. The copy recoiled at once, not with pain but with surprise so naked it looked almost human. The seam behind it shuddered. Frost raced outward in thin white veins. There. A reaction. Rory tightened her grip until the chain cut into her skin. Her fear remained, but now it had edges she could use. “Back up,” she said. The thing’s face smoothed. “Rory—” “Back up.” The red light deepened, throbbing in time with her pulse. Around the clearing, the unseen circling halted. The flowers bowed low, all at once, as if a pressure had settled over them. For one impossible second the grove held itself in suspension. The copy’s eyes fixed on the pendant. Its borrowed features began, very subtly, to slip. One corner of the mouth lagged behind the other. The pupils widened until the blue nearly vanished. Then, from somewhere just beyond the standing stones, a woman screamed. The sound tore through the clearing with such raw human terror that Rory’s entire body reacted before her mind did. She twisted toward it, heart dropping into her stomach. That was the mistake. When she snapped her gaze back, the copy was gone from the hawthorn. The flashlight beam found only swinging branches, the black seam in the air, and flowers shuddering as if something had rushed through them at speed. Behind her, very close, her own voice whispered into her ear. “Too slow.”
created_at"2026-03-06T12:22:13.592Z" 3/6/2026, 12:22:13 PM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency567
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time83082
tokens_prompt812
tokens_completion3972
native_tokens_prompt742
native_tokens_completion3236
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.050395
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ff5625c-403f-4d7f-b895-58ac7295062c"
id"resp_0404a4f662be8bb20169aac6f5a9008193be37ab259c6574fc"
is_byokfalse
latency183
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1772799733-moavSbUr4x3yIU0I64gW"
upstream_id"resp_0404a4f662be8bb20169aac6f5a9008193be37ab259c6574fc"
total_cost0.050395
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
66.67% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags15
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"she said quietly [quietly]"
1"She thought absurdly [absurdly]"
dialogueSentences22
tagDensity0.682
leniency1
rawRatio0.133
effectiveRatio0.133
67.00% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount2576
totalAiIsmAdverbs17
found
0
adverb"completely"
count1
1
adverb"suddenly"
count1
2
adverb"gently"
count1
3
adverb"very"
count6
4
adverb"slowly"
count2
5
adverb"carefully"
count1
6
adverb"tenderly"
count1
7
adverb"slightly"
count1
8
adverb"quickly"
count1
9
adverb"perfectly"
count1
10
adverb"softly"
count1
highlights
0"completely"
1"suddenly"
2"gently"
3"very"
4"slowly"
5"carefully"
6"tenderly"
7"slightly"
8"quickly"
9"perfectly"
10"softly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
51.48% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount2576
totalAiIsms25
found
0
word"pulse"
count4
1
word"warmth"
count3
2
word"silence"
count2
3
word"hulking"
count1
4
word"stomach"
count2
5
word"pulsed"
count2
6
word"could feel"
count1
7
word"footsteps"
count1
8
word"weight"
count1
9
word"perfect"
count2
10
word"echo"
count1
11
word"down her spine"
count1
12
word"trembled"
count1
13
word"flicker"
count1
14
word"comforting"
count1
15
word"raced"
count1
highlights
0"pulse"
1"warmth"
2"silence"
3"hulking"
4"stomach"
5"pulsed"
6"could feel"
7"footsteps"
8"weight"
9"perfect"
10"echo"
11"down her spine"
12"trembled"
13"flicker"
14"comforting"
15"raced"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"world had stopped"
count1
highlights
0"as if the world had shifted"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells2
narrationSentences278
matches
0"was afraid"
1"t with surprise"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount3
narrationSentences278
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"began to"
1"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences285
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen43
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords2566
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions14
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
100.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions30
wordCount2505
uniqueNames9
maxNameDensity0.76
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity1.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Aurora1
Richmond1
Park1
Eva2
Rory19
Cardiff-softened1
Several1
Hel2
Heartstone2
persons
0"Aurora"
1"Eva"
2"Rory"
3"Heartstone"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"Hel"
globalScore1
windowScore1
90.48% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences168
glossingSentenceCount4
matches
0"seemed almost eager to reveal itself"
1"seemed weaker swallowed by the clearing before it reached the tree line"
2"seemed briefly fresh"
3"as if listening"
83.09% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches3
per1kWords1.169
wordCount2566
matches
0"not faintly but with a banked, bloody glow"
1"not physically, but with a certainty she could feel all the way up her arm"
2"not with pain but with surprise so naked it looked almost human"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences285
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs123
mean20.86
std21.98
cv1.054
sampleLengths
091
117
22
32
48
511
694
73
812
986
1015
1112
129
1316
1417
152
1624
1710
183
1981
2064
215
225
2361
2451
2513
2627
2723
283
2912
3064
3154
327
3311
346
355
361
3712
383
3960
406
4111
4211
4355
4412
453
4618
4711
482
493
98.95% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences278
matches
0"being watched"
1"was depressed"
2"was gone"
3"was meant"
4"was gone"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount3
totalVerbs405
matches
0"was like walking"
1"was already standing"
2"were pulling"
42.61% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount10
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences10
totalSentences285
ratio0.035
matches
0"London still existed somewhere behind her—streets slick with drizzle, buses hissing at stops, laughter leaking from pub doors—but here the night had teeth."
1"It had been doing that for two days now—small flares of heat whenever she passed mirrors after dark, whenever the air turned suddenly cold, whenever she caught, in the corner of her eye, the impression of a doorway where no doorway stood."
2"Far off, something barked—a deer, maybe."
3"Wildflowers spread across the clearing in a soft, low riot of color—bluebells, foxgloves, buttercups, things she could not name."
4"Not calmer—still."
5"The ash tree remained at her back for too long; the hawthorn never quite got closer."
6"Some instinct—animal and absolute—warned her against giving whatever it was the satisfaction."
7"The flowers did not merely move; they oriented."
8"Between the roots of the trees, the darkness ahead seemed less like shadow and more like depth—an absence with contour."
9"Not glowed—flared, sudden and fierce, a clot of red light flooding the hawthorn shadows."
85.06% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2225
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount127
adverbRatio0.05707865168539326
lyAdverbCount41
lyAdverbRatio0.018426966292134833
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences285
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences285
mean9
std6.99
cv0.776
sampleLengths
028
123
210
35
425
517
62
72
88
911
1011
111
1228
1342
147
152
162
171
183
1912
209
2125
224
235
245
2521
2617
2715
2810
292
309
3116
322
332
3413
352
363
372
386
3913
4010
413
4234
4311
4418
4518
4619
4714
4814
496
45.26% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats26
diversityRatio0.3263157894736842
totalSentences285
uniqueOpeners93
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount14
totalSentences242
matches
0"Even the path looked less"
1"Then, after a beat, something"
2"Just a shape of sound"
3"More like misalignment, as if"
4"Then something pale moved between"
5"Then, from behind her this"
6"Instead she looked down."
7"Instead, a second darkness lay"
8"Then she saw it."
9"Maybe more than that."
10"Somewhere beyond the hawthorn, something"
11"More than one."
12"Once, just once, her light"
13"Then, from somewhere just beyond"
ratio0.058
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount63
totalSentences242
matches
0"She stopped beneath a dead-looking"
1"Her thumb hovered over Eva’s"
2"You do not go into"
3"It had been doing that"
4"She tucked the phone into"
5"Her flashlight beam jittered ahead"
6"she muttered, mostly to hear"
7"Her own words dropped into"
8"She listened until the silence"
9"she said quietly, though she"
10"She kept going."
11"She knew them on sight"
12"They stood in a rough"
13"Their scent hung thick in"
14"It did, in a way."
15"Her own breathing turned loud."
16"It hung from its silver"
17"she said under her breath,"
18"She looked around the clearing."
19"She took a few steps"
ratio0.26
96.36% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount176
totalSentences242
matches
0"London still existed somewhere behind"
1"The wind moved through the"
2"She stopped beneath a dead-looking"
3"Her thumb hovered over Eva’s"
4"You do not go into"
5"Rory had nearly smiled when"
6"It had been doing that"
7"Tonight the warmth had sharpened"
8"She tucked the phone into"
9"The standing stones were farther"
10"The first time she had"
11"Tonight the park resisted."
12"Brambles snagged at her jeans."
13"Mud sucked at her trainers."
14"Trees massed thickly where she"
15"Her flashlight beam jittered ahead"
16"The pendant shifted under her"
17"she muttered, mostly to hear"
18"Her own words dropped into"
19"The wind moved."
ratio0.727
41.32% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount2
totalSentences242
matches
0"By the time Aurora reached"
1"If this thing wanted it,"
ratio0.008
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences99
technicalSentenceCount4
matches
0"Even the path looked less certain than it had by day, thinning into darkness as if the park had begun to reconsider letting her in."
1"The grass beneath them felt oddly springy, as if rooted in something softer than soil."
2"Once, just once, her light snagged on a shape between the flowers: a white hand laid flat against the ground as if something were pulling itself forward without…"
3"The flashlight beam found only swinging branches, the black seam in the air, and flowers shuddering as if something had rushed through them at speed."
91.67% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags15
uselessAdditionCount1
matches
0"it said, and the voice was hers now down to the smallest grain"
78.57% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags14
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"she muttered (mutter)"
1"she whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences22
tagDensity0.636
leniency1
rawRatio0.143
effectiveRatio0.143
87.9503%