Run: 2026-03-09-01KKAC8AEK9FPAHP38JWBD3WVE

Run Details

Duration:
1m 48s
Cost:
$0.068437
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4415" name="Lucien Moreau" aliases="Lucien, Luc, the Frenchman" pronouns="he/him" species="Half-Demon" storyRole="Ally"> <eyeColor>heterochromatic — one amber, one black</eyeColor> <hair>slicked-back platinum blond</hair> <height>5'11"</height> <age>32</age> <cane>ivory-handled cane that conceals a thin blade</cane> <dress>tailored charcoal suits</dress> <description>An impeccably dressed fixer and information broker in London's supernatural underworld. He speaks four languages fluently.</description> <backstory>Born in Marseille to a human mother and a demon father from the realm of Avaros.</backstory> </character> <location id="858" name="Eva's Flat" aliases="Eva's place, the flat on Brick Lane" realm="Earth"> <cat>tabby cat named Ptolemy</cat> <security>three deadbolts on the front door</security> <description>A cramped one-bedroom flat above a curry house on Brick Lane, East London. Every surface is covered with books, scrolls, and research notes.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the romance genre. Two people who parted on complicated terms are forced together again when one shows up unannounced at the other's flat. There's history between them — attraction, hurt, and things left unsaid. Write the scene from the moment the door opens. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
By the time Aurora slid back the third deadbolt, she was already annoyed. Eva had texted ten minutes ago to say she was downstairs arguing with the owner of the curry house about a package that had gone missing. That, or it was Mr. Rahman from next door coming to complain again about Ptolemy slipping into the hall and staring at him like a tiny striped tax collector. Either way, Rory opened the door with half her attention still on the marked-up pages spread across Eva’s tiny kitchen table. Then she looked up. Lucien Moreau stood in the narrow hall as if he had been painted there for contrast: charcoal suit cut to his impossible frame, pale hair slicked back, one hand resting lightly on the ivory handle of his cane. Brick Lane’s weak yellow stairwell light caught his face in slices, sharpening the line of his cheekbone and the hard set of his mouth. One eye flashed amber. The other, black as a seal in wax, gave nothing away. Rory’s hand tightened on the edge of the door. For one stunned beat, neither of them spoke. Ptolemy appeared out of nowhere and wound himself around Rory’s ankle with a questioning trill, entirely too pleased with life. Lucien’s gaze dropped, noted the cat, returned to her face. “Bonsoir, Aurora.” Of course his voice would still do that to her. Low and smooth, with Marseille folded into London until every word sounded faintly amused, faintly dangerous. She hated that her body remembered him faster than her mind did. The old awareness lit through her all at once—skin, pulse, breath—followed closely by anger at herself for feeling it. She braced a shoulder against the door. “No.” One dark brow lifted. “No?” “No, you don’t get to turn up on my doorstep as if we are the sort of people who receive one another politely.” “This is not your flat.” “Do you want to start with technicalities? Because I’m in an excellent mood for a fight.” Something flickered at the corner of his mouth—not a smile, not quite. “I can see that.” He looked tired. It was such an ordinary observation, and so disarming, that it nearly let him in. The immaculate suit was still immaculate, but there was strain beneath it: a faint shadow under his eyes, a tautness around the mouth, the stillness of a man holding himself together by decision rather than ease. Rain had darkened one shoulder of his jacket. London damp glimmered on the ends of his platinum hair. Rory hardened herself against the instinct to care. “What do you want, Lucien?” “To speak with you.” “That privilege expired.” “Nevertheless.” She let out a short, disbelieving breath. “That is a remarkable sentence from a man who vanished for six weeks.” His expression did not change, but something in him went very quiet. “May I come in?” “No.” “Aurora.” “Don’t.” Her voice sharpened. “Don’t say my name like that and expect me to forget the last time I saw you.” That landed. She saw it. His fingers shifted on the cane, not enough to betray nerves to anyone who did not know how unnaturally controlled he always was. Rory knew. She had spent enough evenings watching him across low tables in lamplit back rooms, reading the tiny cracks in his composure while he traded secrets with creatures who could smell fear. She knew the exact weight of his silence when he was choosing what truth to offer. And she remembered the last time too clearly. Not this stairwell. Not Eva’s flat. A different night, a different threshold. Her hand in his lapel. His forehead nearly touching hers. The heat of his breath. The devastating certainty that after months of circling each other with jokes and bargains and almosts, he was finally going to kiss her. Then a shadow crossing his face. A step back. The words, clipped and cold enough to flay her: This was a mistake. He had left before she could decide whether to slap him or beg him to explain. He never explained. “Aurora.” This time her name came rougher. “Please.” The word hit harder than it should have. Lucien did not say please unless he had run out of leverage. Rory studied him for another second, then stepped back from the door with bad grace. “Five minutes. If I hate your explanation, I reserve the right to throw you down the stairs.” “I would expect nothing less.” He crossed the threshold with that elegant, contained limp she had once learned not to stare at. The cane clicked softly on Eva’s worn floorboards. The flat seemed to shrink around him. Everything in Eva’s place was cramped and overfull—books stacked in tottering columns, loose notes papering the table, scroll cases under the radiator, the air rich with cumin from downstairs and old paper and cat fur. Lucien belonged to cleaner spaces. Polished wood. Locked drawers. Expensive whiskey and dangerous conversations. Ptolemy, traitor that he was, went straight to him. Lucien bent with surprising care, gloved fingers offering the tabby a cautious stroke. Ptolemy rewarded him with a purr like a small engine. Rory shut the door and threw each deadbolt with unnecessary force. “Even the cat has terrible judgment.” “Animals often like me.” Lucien straightened. “People less so.” “Can’t imagine why.” His gaze moved over the room and came back to her. There it lingered. She was suddenly, irritably conscious of herself: old black jumper with one sleeve shoved to the elbow, exposing the pale crescent scar on her left wrist; leggings; bare feet cold on the floorboards; black hair escaping the knot she had twisted it into when she settled down with Eva’s research. Not the look she would have chosen for this reunion. Then again, she would not have chosen the reunion at all. “Say it,” she said. Lucien did not. Instead he took in a slow breath, as if organizing thoughts he would rather leave in disarray. “There are people looking for something. A ledger. I have reason to believe they think you know where it is.” Rory stared at him. “Absolutely not.” “I know.” “Oh, well, how comforting. You know I’m innocent while standing in the flat of the person who is clearly your first stop in this charming little manhunt?” “Aurora—” “No, actually, I’m enjoying myself now. Please continue. Tell me how you disappeared, ignored every message I was stupid enough to send, and then reappeared only because someone inconvenient might be after me. Very flattering. Very romantic.” That finally made him flinch. The satisfaction she expected did not arrive. His jaw tightened. “I did not come because it was inconvenient.” “Then why did you come?” He held her gaze. “Because if they reach you before I do, you will be hurt.” There it was again—that stupid treacherous pull low in her chest, as if concern from him still counted for more than concern from anyone else. Rory crossed her arms to hold herself still. “You do not get to decide when my safety matters,” she said. “No.” His voice was quiet now. “I decided that badly before.” Silence opened between them, crowded with all the things they had never said while it still might have made a difference. Downstairs, a burst of laughter rose from the curry house, muffled through the floor. A car horn sounded in the street. Ptolemy leapt onto a stack of journals and sat, tail wrapped around his paws, like a magistrate prepared to hear testimony. Rory looked at Lucien and saw, against her will, the man she had missed. Not the broker everyone in the underworld approached with caution. Not the immaculate liar with a blade hidden in his cane. The man who once walked her home at three in the morning through rain-slick alleys and said nothing at all, because he had recognized that talking would make her cry. The man who translated a threat murmured in Romanian without changing expression, then bought her chips from a van because her hands were shaking. The man who made her laugh exactly when she wanted to stay angry. That was what had made the hurt so humiliating. He had earned her trust carefully. Then he had treated it like something he could put down. She leaned back against the table. “Try again. This time with honesty.” A long second passed. “I left,” he said, “because if I had stayed, I would have told you things that would have put you in danger.” “You mean more danger than whatever this is?” “Yes.” She gave a brittle laugh. “Convenient. Mysterious. You always did know how to package nonsense beautifully.” “It is not nonsense.” “Then prove it.” His black eye went flat. The amber one, in this light, looked almost gold. “There was a contract on me.” That snagged her attention despite herself. “From who?” “Irrelevant.” “Not if they were trying to kill you.” “Not kill.” His mouth curved without humor. “Acquire.” Rory’s stomach turned over. In Lucien’s world, those were often worse. He continued before she could speak. “A family from Avaros believed they could make use of my father’s blood through me. They had assistance here. Human, mostly. Greedy men with poor instincts. I discovered the arrangement too late, and by then anyone close to me was—” “Targetable,” she finished. “Yes.” The word settled heavily in the room. Rory searched his face for signs of invention. Lucien lied elegantly when he chose to, but never with his eyes. She had learned that too. When he was fabricating, his expression became smoother, prettier, almost decorative. Now he looked stripped down to essentials—tired, guarded, and unwillingly sincere. “You could have told me,” she said, and heard the crack in the sentence before she could smooth it away. “You could have given me enough to understand.” “No.” It came immediate, fierce. “If you had understood, you would have involved yourself.” “I am capable of making my own decisions.” “You are. That is precisely the problem.” For one absurd moment she nearly smiled. It used to be a running argument between them—that he mistook self-destruction for strategy and she mistook strategy for cowardice. The memory hurt too much to be funny. “So instead,” she said, “you made the decision for me.” His gaze dropped for the first time, to her wrist where the scar caught pale against her skin, then back to her face. “Yes.” “And you thought that would go well?” “I did not think it would go well. I thought it would keep you alive.” Rory pushed away from the table and paced two steps because standing still had become impossible. The flat offered no real room for anger; every turn brought her up against shelves or books or the edge of the sofa. She dragged a hand through her hair. “Do you know what was worst about it?” Lucien said nothing. “You looked at me like you felt nothing.” She turned to him. “That was the part that made me feel insane. Because I knew what had been there. I’m not arrogant enough to imagine the whole thing, Lucien. I knew. And then suddenly I was standing there with my pride in my hands while you looked at me as if I had mistaken politeness for interest.” Something flashed across his face then—pain, swift and naked. “You did not mistake anything,” he said. The room seemed to lose a degree of air. Rory swallowed. “That’s not enough.” “I know.” “Because I needed more than almost. I needed more than loaded glances and you appearing every time I was in trouble and the way you touched me like you were already regretting it. I needed you to actually say something.” His hand tightened on the cane until the leather of his glove creased. “And if I had?” She laughed once, helplessly. “Then at least I wouldn’t have spent a month wondering whether I’d invented every second of it.” He took a step toward her. Rory felt it as surely as if the floor tilted. He stopped at what might once have been a careful distance. In Eva’s tiny flat it was nothing. She could see the faint stubble shadowing his jaw, the damp still drying at his collar, the old silver scar near his temple she had noticed only after the fifth time they met. His scent reached her under the city rain—cedar, smoke, some clean expensive soap that always made her think absurdly of danger made civilized. “I wanted you,” he said. No flourish. No charm. The plainness of it struck harder than any polished line would have. Her pulse jumped. He went on, voice low and tight. “From nearly the first evening. Long before it was wise. Long before I could pretend I did not. That night…” He exhaled once. “If I had kissed you, I would not have stopped at a kiss. And if I had not left after that, I would have stayed. There are people in my life, Aurora, who learn what matters to me and use it. I would not hand them your name.” She should have stayed angry. She knew she should. But there was too much truth in him now, and it was the truth she had wanted so badly it had become a bruise she stopped pressing only because she had to. “You don’t get to say things like that six weeks late,” she said, though the force had gone out of it. “No.” A tiny bitter smile touched his mouth. “I am discovering there are consequences to my poor timing.” She hated that she nearly smiled back. Downstairs, the curry house door banged. Voices climbed the stairwell, then faded again. Eva was still occupied. Time had narrowed strangely inside the flat, all of it bending around the two of them and the unfinished thing between them. Rory looked at him. Really looked. “Are you safe now?” Lucien hesitated. That was answer enough. “Lucien.” “The immediate threat has changed shape.” “Meaning?” “Meaning the family in question has lost interest in acquiring me. They would now prefer to deprive others of my services.” “So, kill you.” He inclined his head slightly. “Crude, but accurate.” “God.” She pressed fingers to her temple. “And the ledger?” “A separate problem, regrettably adjacent. Someone believes Eva has information connected to it. By extension, they may decide you do as well.” Rory let out a long breath. Practicality returned first; it always did. “Eva’s downstairs. If anyone’s watching the building, your arrival hasn’t helped.” “I know.” “You always know. It’s one of your least endearing qualities.” “And yet you continue to speak to me.” “Debatably.” She glanced toward the window, then back. “How many people?” “Possibly two in the street. One in the opposite building earlier. I lost another near Commercial Road.” A laugh escaped her, astonished at the shape of her own evening. “Right. Fine. We move the notes, we call Eva upstairs without saying why, and then—” “Aurora.” Something in his tone made her stop. He had not moved closer again, but the air between them had changed. Softer now. More dangerous. “I am sorry,” he said. She closed her eyes for a moment. There were apologies that arrived too late and still mattered because the wound had never truly closed. This one slid into a place in her she had kept barred by stubbornness alone. When she opened her eyes, he was watching her with a steadiness that felt almost unbearably intimate. “You hurt me,” she said. “I know.” “And I do not forgive elegantly.” “Also known.” “I might say terrible things for the next several days.” “I would be relieved if you confined yourself to days.” That did make her smile, unwillingly and at the edges. His expression changed when he saw it. The severity loosened. Warmth moved under it, cautious and bright as a match cupped against wind. For one perilous second, the flat and the danger and the missing weeks all fell away, leaving only this: him looking at her as if the sight of her smile cost him something and gave him something too. Rory’s breath caught. “Don’t,” she murmured, though she was not sure what she meant. Don’t look at me like that. Don’t step closer. Don’t make this harder. Don’t stop. Lucien’s gaze dropped to her mouth and came back up, slow enough that she felt it everywhere. “If I have misread the situation,” he said softly, “this would be an excellent moment to insult me.” “You are an unbelievable coward.” A faint huff of laughter left him. “Better.” “And infuriating.” “I have heard that.” “And if you disappear again, I will hunt you down myself.” Something dark and pleased flickered in his eyes. “That is the most encouraging thing you have said to me tonight.” Rory shook her head at him, because it was either that or reach for him first. “Still insufferable.” “Undeniably.” He lifted one gloved hand with visible care, giving her time to refuse. Time to step back. Time to remember every reason not to do this. She didn’t move. His fingers touched her jaw, light at first, almost formal. Then his thumb traced once along the line beneath her ear, and the contact turned intimate enough to make her stomach drop. Rory looked up at him and saw his control fraying by threads. “Tell me to stop,” he said. She should have made him work harder. She knew that too. But want had always been the most honest thing between them. So she caught the front of his suit jacket in her fist and pulled him down. The kiss landed with all the weeks they had lost inside it. Lucien made a rough sound against her mouth, one she felt more than heard, and then his restraint went with astonishing speed. He kissed her as if he had thought about this in detail and without mercy. The hand at her jaw slid into her hair, careful of pins and tangles only for a second before care gave way to need. Rory rose into him on instinct, anger and relief and old hunger tangling so tightly she could not have named one from the next. His mouth was warm, then deeper, and she tasted rain and whiskey and the precise undoing of her own composure. The edge of the table pressed into her hip. Papers fluttered to the floor. Somewhere beside them Ptolemy objected with an offended chirrup and leapt off his stack. Lucien broke the kiss only far enough to rest his forehead against hers. His breath came unevenly now. So did hers. “That,” he said, voice gone low and ragged, “is not forgiveness.” “No,” Rory said, equally breathless. “That was me checking whether I still hated you.” “And?” She opened her eyes. His amber eye had gone molten in the low light; the black one was bottomless. He looked less like a fixer now and more like the dangerous half-wild thing London whispered about when his name came up after midnight. Yet the hand in her hair was absurdly gentle. “I’m still deciding,” she said. “Take your time.” She almost kissed him again just for the way he said it. Instead she let her hand flatten briefly against his chest, feeling the hard beat there under fine wool. Real. Alive. Here. “We still have a problem outside.” “Yes.” “And Eva will notice if I answer the phone sounding like this.” The hint of a smile returned. “Sounding like what?” “Smug.” He actually laughed then, soft and surprised, and the sound went through her like warmth. Rory had not realized how much she had missed that until now. A sharp buzz sounded from the intercom by the door. They both went still. Then Eva’s voice crackled up through the speaker, impatient and tinny. “Rory, why is Lucien Moreau in my stairwell and why are there two men pretending not to watch the building from across the street?” Rory met Lucien’s gaze. Complicated terms, apparently, were over. Or at least postponed. She drew one steadying breath, not stepping away from him quite yet. “Right,” she said. “Now we can fight later.” His thumb brushed once, swiftly, over her cheek before he let his hand fall. “I look forward to it.” And annoyingly, thrillingly, she believed him.
created_at"2026-03-09T22:42:31.518Z" 3/9/2026, 10:42:31 PM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency3143
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time107866
tokens_prompt808
tokens_completion5386
native_tokens_prompt753
native_tokens_completion4437
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning126
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.0684375
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ff5625c-403f-4d7f-b895-58ac7295062c"
id"resp_0dc4e08b3a5814190169af4cd79e34819394acdbd640f3beac"
is_byokfalse
latency289
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773096151-EhGrLnW3f7h3YiNaei2T"
upstream_id"resp_0dc4e08b3a5814190169af4cd79e34819394acdbd640f3beac"
total_cost0.0684375
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags28
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"He exhaled once [once]"
1"he said softly [softly]"
dialogueSentences131
tagDensity0.214
leniency0.427
rawRatio0.071
effectiveRatio0.031
77.88% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3391
totalAiIsmAdverbs15
found
0
adverb"lightly"
count1
1
adverb"very"
count3
2
adverb"softly"
count2
3
adverb"suddenly"
count2
4
adverb"carefully"
count1
5
adverb"precisely"
count1
6
adverb"helplessly"
count1
7
adverb"really"
count1
8
adverb"slightly"
count1
9
adverb"truly"
count1
10
adverb"tightly"
count1
highlights
0"lightly"
1"very"
2"softly"
3"suddenly"
4"carefully"
5"precisely"
6"helplessly"
7"really"
8"slightly"
9"truly"
10"tightly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
73.46% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3391
totalAiIsms18
found
0
word"pulse"
count2
1
word"flickered"
count2
2
word"remarkable"
count1
3
word"weight"
count1
4
word"silence"
count2
5
word"absolutely"
count1
6
word"comforting"
count1
7
word"treacherous"
count1
8
word"stomach"
count2
9
word"charm"
count1
10
word"warmth"
count2
11
word"traced"
count1
12
word"fluttered"
count1
highlights
0"pulse"
1"flickered"
2"remarkable"
3"weight"
4"silence"
5"absolutely"
6"comforting"
7"treacherous"
8"stomach"
9"charm"
10"warmth"
11"traced"
12"fluttered"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences240
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount2
narrationSentences240
filterMatches
0"think"
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences342
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen54
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3382
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions29
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
99.66% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions72
wordCount2384
uniqueNames14
maxNameDensity1.01
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity2
worstWindowName"Lucien"
discoveredNames
Aurora1
Mr1
Ptolemy6
Rory24
Eva9
Moreau1
Lane1
Marseille1
London3
Lucien16
Silence1
Romanian1
Don4
Time3
persons
0"Aurora"
1"Mr"
2"Ptolemy"
3"Rory"
4"Eva"
5"Moreau"
6"Lucien"
7"Silence"
8"Time"
places
0"Lane"
1"Marseille"
2"London"
3"Romanian"
globalScore0.997
windowScore1
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences154
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"not quite"
1"as if organizing thoughts he would rather leave in disarray"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount3382
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount4
totalSentences342
matches
0"hated that her"
1"disarming, that it"
2"recognized that talking"
3"hated that she"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs188
mean17.99
std20.28
cv1.127
sampleLengths
013
176
24
377
49
58
620
712
857
98
105
1123
125
1316
1416
153
1669
178
185
194
203
211
2220
2316
241
251
2621
2777
288
2950
3022
3116
323
338
3420
3532
365
3781
389
3923
4017
419
423
4314
4471
454
4640
476
482
4927
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount2
totalSentences240
matches
0"been painted"
1"was, went"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount5
totalVerbs435
matches
0"was choosing"
1"was finally going"
2"were shaking"
3"was fabricating"
4"was watching"
42.61% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount9
semicolonCount6
flaggedSentences12
totalSentences342
ratio0.035
matches
0"The old awareness lit through her all at once—skin, pulse, breath—followed closely by anger at herself for feeling it."
1"Something flickered at the corner of his mouth—not a smile, not quite."
2"Everything in Eva’s place was cramped and overfull—books stacked in tottering columns, loose notes papering the table, scroll cases under the radiator, the air rich with cumin from downstairs and old paper and cat fur."
3"She was suddenly, irritably conscious of herself: old black jumper with one sleeve shoved to the elbow, exposing the pale crescent scar on her left wrist; leggings; bare feet cold on the floorboards; black hair escaping the knot she had twisted it into when she settled down with Eva’s research."
4"There it was again—that stupid treacherous pull low in her chest, as if concern from him still counted for more than concern from anyone else."
5"Now he looked stripped down to essentials—tired, guarded, and unwillingly sincere."
6"It used to be a running argument between them—that he mistook self-destruction for strategy and she mistook strategy for cowardice."
7"The flat offered no real room for anger; every turn brought her up against shelves or books or the edge of the sofa."
8"Something flashed across his face then—pain, swift and naked."
9"His scent reached her under the city rain—cedar, smoke, some clean expensive soap that always made her think absurdly of danger made civilized."
10"Practicality returned first; it always did."
11"His amber eye had gone molten in the low light; the black one was bottomless."
74.24% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2397
adjectiveStacks1
stackExamples
0"dangerous half-wild thing"
adverbCount150
adverbRatio0.0625782227784731
lyAdverbCount47
lyAdverbRatio0.0196078431372549
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences342
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences342
mean9.89
std8.69
cv0.878
sampleLengths
013
126
25
324
421
54
638
724
84
911
109
118
1220
1310
142
1510
1616
1712
1819
197
201
214
221
2323
245
2516
2612
274
283
2915
3036
318
3210
338
345
354
363
371
387
3913
4012
414
421
431
444
4517
462
473
4823
492
43.27% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats23
diversityRatio0.2982456140350877
totalSentences342
uniqueOpeners102
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount10
totalSentences212
matches
0"Then she looked up."
1"Of course his voice would"
2"Then a shadow crossing his"
3"Then again, she would not"
4"Instead he took in a"
5"Then he had treated it"
6"Then his thumb traced once"
7"Somewhere beside them Ptolemy objected"
8"Instead she let her hand"
9"Then Eva’s voice crackled up"
ratio0.047
84.15% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount72
totalSentences212
matches
0"She hated that her body"
1"She braced a shoulder against"
2"He looked tired."
3"It was such an ordinary"
4"She let out a short,"
5"His expression did not change,"
6"Her voice sharpened"
7"She saw it."
8"His fingers shifted on the"
9"She had spent enough evenings"
10"She knew the exact weight"
11"Her hand in his lapel."
12"His forehead nearly touching hers."
13"He had left before she"
14"He never explained."
15"He crossed the threshold with"
16"His gaze moved over the"
17"She was suddenly, irritably conscious"
18"His jaw tightened."
19"He held her gaze."
ratio0.34
66.13% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount167
totalSentences212
matches
0"Eva had texted ten minutes"
1"That, or it was Mr."
2"Rahman from next door coming"
3"Lucien Moreau stood in the"
4"Brick Lane’s weak yellow stairwell"
5"The other, black as a"
6"Rory’s hand tightened on the"
7"Ptolemy appeared out of nowhere"
8"Lucien’s gaze dropped, noted the"
9"She hated that her body"
10"The old awareness lit through"
11"She braced a shoulder against"
12"Something flickered at the corner"
13"He looked tired."
14"It was such an ordinary"
15"The immaculate suit was still"
16"Rain had darkened one shoulder"
17"London damp glimmered on the"
18"Rory hardened herself against the"
19"She let out a short,"
ratio0.788
94.34% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount4
totalSentences212
matches
0"By the time Aurora slid"
1"Either way, Rory opened the"
2"When he was fabricating, his"
3"Now he looked stripped down"
ratio0.019
98.67% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences97
technicalSentenceCount6
matches
0"Lucien Moreau stood in the narrow hall as if he had been painted there for contrast: charcoal suit cut to his impossible frame, pale hair slicked back, one hand…"
1"She had spent enough evenings watching him across low tables in lamplit back rooms, reading the tiny cracks in his composure while he traded secrets with creatu…"
2"There it was again—that stupid treacherous pull low in her chest, as if concern from him still counted for more than concern from anyone else."
3"The man who translated a threat murmured in Romanian without changing expression, then bought her chips from a van because her hands were shaking."
4"When she opened her eyes, he was watching her with a steadiness that felt almost unbearably intimate."
5"For one perilous second, the flat and the danger and the missing weeks all fell away, leaving only this: him looking at her as if the sight of her smile cost hi…"
89.29% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags28
uselessAdditionCount2
matches
0"It came, fierce"
1"he said, voice gone low and ragged,"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags18
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"She pressed (press)"
1"she murmured (murmur)"
dialogueSentences131
tagDensity0.137
leniency0.275
rawRatio0.111
effectiveRatio0.031
91.4572%