Run: 2026-04-24-01KQ0N6QTPCDG053H7XNJ4JQNF

Run Details

Duration:
1m 51s
Cost:
$0.142040
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <location id="861" name="The Fae Grove" aliases="Isolde's grove, Richmond grove, the Grove" realm="Earth (Fae-touched)"> <parkLocation>Richmond Park</parkLocation> <standingStones>ancient oak standing stones mark the boundary</standingStones> <timeBehavior>time moves differently — an hour inside can be minutes or days outside</timeBehavior> <flora>wildflowers bloom year-round</flora> <description>A hidden clearing that exists in a pocket between Earth and the Fae realm.</description> </location> <item id="2001" name="Heartstone Pendant" aliases="the pendant, Heartstone" type="Artifact" origin="Dymas"> <gemstoneColor>deep crimson</gemstoneColor> <chainMaterial>silver chain</chainMaterial> <size>roughly the size of a thumbnail</size> <behavior>pulses faintly with warmth when near a Hel portal</behavior> <glow>faint inner glow</glow> <description>Given to Aurora by an unknown benefactor.</description> </item> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the horror genre. A character is alone in a strange, isolated place at night. They came here for a reason, but something feels off from the moment they arrive. The wrongness builds slowly — sounds that shouldn't be there, things that move at the edge of vision, a growing certainty that they are not alone. Build tension through restraint, not through gore. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for the character and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
Aurora Carter had never liked Richmond Park after dark. By daylight it was too open, too green, too full of joggers and dog walkers and red deer standing still as judgment in the bracken. At night, the openness turned against you. The paths dissolved into black ribbons. The trees leaned together. Every distant movement became an animal until it moved like a person, and every person became a question. She stood at the edge of the copse with her bicycle half-hidden in a tangle of elder and hawthorn, one hand still on the handlebar, and told herself to stop being dramatic. The delivery bag on the back rack was empty. Yu-Fei had let her go early because the rain had scared off half the dinner crowd, and Rory had taken the long route through Richmond because she had been stupid enough to believe the anonymous note in her jacket pocket. Midnight. The stones in Richmond. Bring the Heartstone if you want answers about who gave it to you. No signature. No flourish. Just block letters on a scrap of receipt paper tucked beneath the windscreen wiper of the battered scooter she used for the restaurant. Except she had not taken the scooter today. She had taken her bicycle. The note had been waiting all the same, folded into the bell on her handlebars as if someone had watched her leave the flat above Silas’ bar and adjusted accordingly. That was the first sensible reason not to come. The second was that the pendant had warmed when she read the words. It warmed now. Aurora touched it through her jumper, feeling the small shape under wool and coat: the deep crimson stone, no bigger than her thumbnail, hanging from its silver chain. It pulsed against her sternum with a slow, patient heat. Not enough to burn. Enough to feel like a heartbeat that wasn’t hers. “Brilliant,” she muttered. Her voice sounded flat and quickly swallowed. “Absolutely brilliant, Carter. Top marks in self-preservation.” The rain had stopped an hour ago, but the park still shone with it. Water clung to blades of grass and blackened the trunks of trees. A low mist moved over the ground, thin as breath. Somewhere far off, traffic hissed along the road, but here the city seemed to have withdrawn, leaving only the wet smell of earth and leaves and something sweeter underneath. Wildflowers. Aurora frowned. They should not have been there. Not now. Not in January, with frost still whitening gutters in the morning and everyone in London wrapped in scarves and misery. Yet beyond the first line of oaks, faint colors pricked the dark. Blue, yellow, white. A scatter of summer growing out of winter soil. Her left wrist itched beneath her glove, exactly where the small crescent scar lay hidden. It had done that when she was a child, before storms, before fevers, before her mother had taken her hand and said, Hush now, Rory, it’s only skin remembering. Skin could remember all it liked. Aurora preferred evidence. She took the little torch from her pocket and clicked it on. The beam cut through mist and caught on the first of the stones. They rose from the ground not like the tidy monuments in tourist guides, but like old teeth. Dark oak, somehow petrified and still living at once, their surfaces ridged with bark and stone-grain. Standing stones, the note had said. Not proper stones at all. Ancient oak, black with age, arranged in a loose ring that should not have fit between the trees. She had walked this part of Richmond Park before. She had delivered bao and mapo tofu to houses on every side of it. She knew the paths, the ponds, the places where teenagers drank cheap cider. There had never been a ring of oak standing stones here. The pendant gave a small, pleased throb. Aurora swallowed. She had come because the thing around her neck had appeared three weeks ago in a plain box outside her door, wrapped in brown paper, no postmark, no sender. She had come because ever since then, she had dreamed of a red light under ice and a woman’s voice saying the name Malphora as if it were both accusation and prayer. She had come because answers had always been the hook that could drag her anywhere, even somewhere her bones quietly begged her to leave. She slipped the torch into her left hand and stepped forward. The moment she passed between the first two oak stones, the sound of traffic vanished. Not faded. Vanished. Aurora stopped dead. Behind her, the park was still there. She could see the dark line of the path, the pale mist, the crooked silhouette of her bicycle half under the hedge. But the city noise had been cut out of the world with a blade. No cars. No distant siren. No rumble of Heathrow-bound aircraft. Only the faint drip of water from branches and the soft crush of wet grass beneath her boots. “Okay,” she whispered. The word went nowhere. The clearing opened ahead, larger than it had any right to be. Trees formed a black wall around it, their branches woven so densely overhead that the sky showed in torn pieces. No moon. No stars. Yet the grove was not dark. The wildflowers gave off a dim, sourceless radiance, enough to paint the mist milk-white and lay a sheen over every leaf. Bluebells nodded beside foxgloves. Buttercups gleamed beside pale winter hellebore. White blossoms she could not name opened their faces toward nothing. Rory moved carefully, counting her breaths. One, two, three, four in. Hold. Out. She had learned that after Evan, though she hated that he had left any practical use in her at all. Panic was a room. You could find the door if you didn’t throw yourself against the walls. The Heartstone warmed again. The heat spread from her chest into her ribs, almost comforting. Almost. She hooked one finger under the chain and pulled the pendant out. The crimson stone glowed faintly from within, as if lit by a coal. Not red exactly. Deeper than red. The color of blood seen through closed eyelids. “Right,” she said to it. “You wanted a field trip. Now what?” From somewhere in the trees came a click. Aurora turned. Her torch beam slid over trunks, bracken, hanging ivy. Nothing. The beam trembled only a little. She steadied her wrist. Click. It came again from the opposite side of the clearing. Not a twig snapping. Not an animal call. A dry, delicate sound, like fingernails tapping on glass. Aurora listened. The grove listened back. Then, from far away, someone laughed. It was a child’s laugh, bright and brief. Rory’s scalp tightened. “Nope,” she breathed. She turned toward the gap between the oak stones. The gap was gone. The stones stood in a complete ring now, shoulder to shoulder where the entrance had been. Her bicycle was no longer visible. Beyond the ring was not the park but more trees, too close together, their trunks pale in the flower-glow. Mist coiled between them like something searching for feet. Aurora’s mind went cold in that useful, awful way it did under pressure. She walked to the place where she had entered and set her palm against the nearest oak stone. The surface was damp and ridged. Bark under her fingers. Stone beneath. It vibrated faintly, as if some enormous machine ran deep underground. “Fine,” she said. “That’s fine.” It was not fine, but naming that would not open a door. She checked her phone. No signal. The time read 00:03. The screen flickered. 00:03. 00:03. 00:03. The digits held steady while seconds failed to pass. Aurora’s mouth went dry. She locked the phone and shoved it away. Time moved differently in fairy stories. She had grown up with enough Welsh folktales and Irish warnings to know the shape of the trap, even if she had spent most of her adult life pretending folklore was just weather with a better wardrobe. Don’t eat. Don’t dance. Don’t answer to your name if you aren’t certain who speaks it. A breeze slipped through the clearing. The flowers all turned toward her. Not with the wind. Against it. One by one, their pale faces shifted on their stems until every blossom pointed at her boots, her hands, the red stone burning at her chest. Aurora did not move. The click came again. Closer. She lifted the torch. The beam passed over the flowers and caught, for half a second, on something at the edge of the trees. A figure. Tall. Too thin. White where a face should be. Then gone. Her breath stopped in her throat. She swung the torch back. Only tree trunks. Only mist. “Who’s there?” The question left her before she could stop it, sharp and stupid. Silence. Then, very softly, from behind her: “Rory?” Every muscle in her body locked. It was Eva’s voice. Not approximate. Not similar. Eva exactly, with the same low warmth, the same London roughness around the edges, the same slight lift at the end that made Rory’s name sound like both a joke and a rescue. Rory closed her eyes. Don’t answer to your name. The voice came again. “Rory, thank God. I’ve been looking everywhere.” Aurora turned slowly. At the far side of the clearing, between two oak stones, stood Eva. Or something wearing her. It had Eva’s cropped curls, Eva’s leather jacket, Eva’s impatient stance with one hip cocked and arms wrapped tight against the cold. It even had the little silver hoop in the left nostril that Aurora had once teased her about because it flashed like a fish scale in the light. The torch beam touched her face. Eva smiled. Aurora’s stomach dropped. The smile was just a fraction too wide. “Come on,” Eva said. “We need to go.” Aurora kept her free hand on the pendant. It was hot now, hot enough to sting her skin through the chain. “How did you get here?” Eva tilted her head. “Same way you did.” “That’s not an answer.” “It’s enough of one.” Rainwater dripped from the branches. Plink. Plink. Plink. Somewhere to Aurora’s left, the child laughed again, farther away this time, or perhaps underground. Eva’s eyes flicked to the Heartstone. The movement was fast. Hungry. Aurora saw it and felt something inside her settle into place. Fear remained, black and deep, but it had edges now. Shape. A thing could be handled if it had shape. “What did you call me at sixteen,” she asked, “when I dyed my fringe purple and my mother cried for three hours?” Eva blinked. The smile held. “This isn’t the time.” “You’d remember.” “Rory—” “No.” The thing’s face twitched. For one instant, Eva’s features blurred like wet ink. The nose lengthened. The eyes sank. The mouth widened past the cheekbones and then snapped back into place. Aurora’s fingers tightened on the torch until the plastic creaked. “Cabbage witch,” she said. “She called me cabbage witch. Because it came out green.” The false Eva stared at her. Then it laughed. Not a child’s laugh now. Not Eva’s. A soft, papery chuckle that rustled through the trees and came back from every direction. The flowers shivered. The mist drew closer. “Clever little Carter,” it said, and Eva’s voice peeled away from the words, leaving something old and damp underneath. “Always clever. Always looking for the hinge in the wall.” Aurora took a step back. “Who are you?” The thing looked at the pendant again. “You brought a door-knocker into a sleeping house.” “A what?” It smiled with too many teeth. The Heartstone pulsed. Behind the false Eva, between the oak stones, the air darkened. Not shadow. Shadow required light. This was absence, a vertical seam in the world. The flowers nearest it folded shut. Frost crackled over the wet grass in a spreading ring, white veins racing between stems. The sweet smell curdled, turning mineral and cold, like iron left under snow. Aurora felt the pendant beat against her chest. Once. Twice. Three times. Each pulse sent a thread of warmth through the air toward the seam. A portal, she thought, though the word felt absurd and inadequate. A hole. A wound. She had not come to get answers. She had been brought to open something. The seam widened by a hair. From within came a sound like distant breathing through packed earth. Aurora backed away until her heel struck a root. The false Eva advanced one step. “Stay.” “No.” “You came for truth.” “I’ve reconsidered my methods.” Its smile vanished. The grove changed with it. All at once the trees seemed closer, the standing stones taller. The flowers bowed their heads. The mist thickened around Aurora’s knees, cold enough to bite through denim. Shapes moved inside it. Small dark darts at the edge of vision. Fingers? Leaves? Rats? Every time she looked, they stilled. Every time she looked away, they came nearer. The child’s voice whispered from the flowers. “Laila.” Aurora flinched. Another voice, older, breathed from the stones. “Aurora.” Another, from directly beside her ear: “Malphora.” She spun, swinging the torch. Nothing but mist. The pendant flared so hot she cried out. She yanked at the chain by instinct. The clasp caught at the back of her neck, stubborn. Heat licked her collarbone. The seam widened again. A smell poured out: ash, frozen salt, and something animal that had lived too long in the dark. The false Eva’s hands twitched at its sides. Its fingers had grown joint by joint, pale and narrow, nails black as wet bark. “Give it,” it said. Aurora fumbled with the clasp. Her gloves made her clumsy. She tore one off with her teeth, spat it into the grass, and tried again. The silver chain burned her fingertips. Her bright blue eyes watered from the pain, but she kept working the clasp. “Give it willingly,” the thing said, and now the grove spoke with it, leaves and stones and flowers forming a chorus. “Give it, and walk out. Keep it, and be kept.” The clasp came free. Aurora ripped the pendant away from her skin. The effect was immediate. The seam wavered. The breathing beyond it hitched. The false Eva lunged. Rory threw the torch at its face. It was not a plan. It was not elegant. The torch struck the thing’s cheekbone with a dull crack, light spinning wildly as it fell. The false Eva shrieked—not in pain, Rory thought, but outrage—and clapped both elongated hands to its face. Aurora ran. Not toward the vanished entrance. Toward the densest cluster of flowers near the center of the clearing, where the mist seemed thinnest and the ground rose in a low mound. If this place had rules, it had structure. If it wanted the Heartstone at the seam, then anywhere else was better than there. Her boots slipped on wet grass. Something brushed her ankle. She kicked hard and felt it let go with a whispering hiss. The pendant throbbed in her fist, each pulse beating against her palm like a trapped insect. The oak stones groaned. Rory reached the mound and saw, half-hidden among the wildflowers, a flat stone basin no wider than a dinner plate. It was filled with rainwater black as ink. The flowers around it did not face her. They faced the water. A laugh rose behind her. “You cannot break what you do not understand.” Aurora dropped to her knees before the basin. Her jeans soaked through instantly. In the black water, her reflection stared up at her, pale and sharp-faced, shoulder-length black hair plastered to her cheeks by mist, eyes too bright. Behind her reflection, something else moved. Not the false Eva. Something larger. Antlers or branches. A crown of bone. It leaned over her shoulder in the water though the air behind her remained empty. Aurora froze. The reflection’s mouth opened. Not hers. “Blood opens,” it whispered from the basin. “Warmth calls. Names bind.” The pendant burned in her fist. Blood opens. She looked at her left wrist. The crescent scar under the cuff. Childhood accident, her parents had called it. Broken glass in the garden. Too much blood for such a small cut. Her mother’s white face. Her father’s hand pressed hard around her wrist while he shouted for a towel. Skin remembering. “No,” Aurora said softly. “Not blood.” The thing behind her reflection smiled. Names bind. She gripped the silver chain instead of the stone and lowered the pendant toward the basin. The false Eva hissed behind her. Grass tore under running feet. Aurora did the only thing that felt opposite to every demand the grove had made. She did not give the pendant to the creature. She did not feed it blood. She did not speak any of the names it had offered her. She dropped the Heartstone into the rainwater and clapped her bare hand over the basin. The water was colder than pain. The pendant struck the bottom with a tiny, final sound. For a second, nothing happened. Then the grove inhaled. Every flower in the clearing snapped open at once. The standing stones shuddered. The seam near the false Eva folded inward like a slit eye forced shut. The breathing beyond it became a roar and then cut off. The thing wearing Eva screamed. The basin under Aurora’s palm surged with heat. Not from the pendant. From below. Her skin prickled. The crescent scar on her wrist blazed white, though it did not bleed. The black water spun beneath her hand, dragging at her palm as if trying to pull the bones out through her fingers. She held on. “Carter,” the false Eva snarled, no longer sounding like Eva at all. Aurora looked back. It stood a few paces away, half-unmade. Eva’s jacket hung on a frame of pale sticks. Its face had collapsed into smooth white skin with a vertical mouth and no eyes, yet Aurora knew it saw her. Knew it hated her. The flowers between them bent away from its feet. Behind it, the oak stones had shifted. A gap had opened where she had entered, narrow and dark, and beyond it she saw the path. Real park. Real mist. Her bicycle, still under the hedge. Her phone buzzed in her pocket. The sound was so ordinary that it nearly broke her. Aurora snatched her hand from the basin. The Heartstone remained at the bottom, its crimson glow dimmed beneath black water. For one mad second she almost reached for it. Answers. The unknown benefactor. Dymas. Malphora. All of it waiting in a stone that had never once been only a gift. The thing lurched forward. Rory ran for the gap. The clearing stretched. It had to. The gap had been twenty paces away, then thirty, then impossible. Wet grass dragged at her boots. Mist wrapped her thighs. Voices rose around her, wearing accents from her life like stolen coats. Her mother: “Aurora, cariad, come back.” Her father: “Don’t be foolish.” Eva: “Rory, please.” Evan: “You always run when things get difficult.” That one almost stopped her—not from longing, but rage. She drove herself harder, lungs burning. “Not from things,” she gasped. “From people.” The standing stones loomed. The gap narrowed. Bark ground against bark with a sound like molars. Aurora threw herself sideways, shoulder first. For one terrible heartbeat, the stones caught her. Cold pressure clamped both arms. Something tugged at her hair, her coat, the bare skin of her wrist. A voice with no breath whispered from the wood, “Malphora.” She twisted. Her left wrist scraped along the bark. The old scar flared again, white-hot. Then she was through. Sound crashed back into the world. Traffic. Wind. A fox screaming somewhere across the park. Her own breath ragged and ugly in her ears. Aurora hit the ground outside the ring and rolled into wet leaves. For a moment she could do nothing but lie there, cheek pressed to mud, hands clawed in the grass. Rainwater soaked her coat. London smelled of petrol and damp earth and distant chips. Beautiful. Filthy. Real. Her phone buzzed again. She lifted her head. Behind her, the copse looked ordinary. No ring of standing stones. No flowers glowing in winter. No seam in the air. Just oaks and undergrowth and darkness between trunks. Her bicycle leaned where she had left it. Aurora pushed herself up on shaking arms. Her palm was red where the silver chain had burned it, but empty. The pendant was gone. Good, she told herself. Then her chest gave a single answering throb. She went still. Slowly, with a dread so pure it seemed to clean the blood from her veins, Aurora reached beneath her jumper. Her fingers closed around a silver chain. The Heartstone pendant rested against her sternum, warm and dry, its deep crimson center glowing faintly in the dark. From within the copse, very far away or very near, a child laughed once. Aurora backed toward her bicycle without taking her eyes off the trees. Her phone buzzed a third time. This time, she pulled it out. The screen read 00:04. One new message from an unknown number. You found the hinge. Next time, open the door.
created_at"2026-04-24T21:09:19.841Z" 4/24/2026, 9:09:19 PM
model"openai/gpt-5.5-20260423"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency4809
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time110940
tokens_prompt812
tokens_completion5719
native_tokens_prompt742
native_tokens_completion4611
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning32
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.14204
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"58e5b336-423e-430b-a2ab-8bc353f0c51b"
id"resp_060e50757f0fcbdc0169ebdbfff0748193b17e6be76ec14465"
is_byokfalse
latency371
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.5-20260423"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.1; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1777064959-FQL2eeBrPb8LCvb0TOzc"
session_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1777064959-URc1vIzUOeBZ6XMGCoE3"
upstream_id"resp_060e50757f0fcbdc0169ebdbfff0748193b17e6be76ec14465"
total_cost0.14204
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"
response_cache_source_id(null)

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags18
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"Aurora said softly [softly]"
dialogueSentences52
tagDensity0.346
leniency0.692
rawRatio0.056
effectiveRatio0.038
87.33% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3551
totalAiIsmAdverbs9
found
0
adverb"quickly"
count1
1
adverb"carefully"
count1
2
adverb"very"
count3
3
adverb"softly"
count2
4
adverb"slowly"
count2
highlights
0"quickly"
1"carefully"
2"very"
3"softly"
4"slowly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
66.21% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3551
totalAiIsms24
found
0
word"pulsed"
count2
1
word"absolutely"
count1
2
word"throb"
count2
3
word"comforting"
count1
4
word"trembled"
count1
5
word"vibrated"
count1
6
word"flickered"
count1
7
word"dance"
count1
8
word"silence"
count1
9
word"warmth"
count3
10
word"stomach"
count1
11
word"flicked"
count1
12
word"racing"
count1
13
word"pulse"
count2
14
word"wavered"
count1
15
word"structure"
count1
16
word"throbbed"
count1
17
word"lurched"
count1
18
word"loomed"
count1
highlights
0"pulsed"
1"absolutely"
2"throb"
3"comforting"
4"trembled"
5"vibrated"
6"flickered"
7"dance"
8"silence"
9"warmth"
10"stomach"
11"flicked"
12"racing"
13"pulse"
14"wavered"
15"structure"
16"throbbed"
17"lurched"
18"loomed"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"stomach dropped/sank"
count1
highlights
0"stomach dropped"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences437
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount2
narrationSentences437
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences467
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen41
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3548
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions24
unquotedAttributions1
matches
0"Good, she told herself."
0.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions118
wordCount3355
uniqueNames20
maxNameDensity1.16
worstName"Aurora"
maxWindowNameDensity5
worstWindowName"Eva"
discoveredNames
Carter1
Richmond4
Park2
Rory10
Heartstone8
January1
London3
Hush1
Malphora2
Heathrow-bound1
Evan2
Welsh1
Irish1
Silence1
Eva28
Aurora39
One3
Don4
Plink3
Real3
persons
0"Carter"
1"Rory"
2"Heartstone"
3"Evan"
4"Eva"
5"Aurora"
6"One"
places
0"Richmond"
1"Park"
2"January"
3"London"
globalScore0.919
windowScore0
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences231
glossingSentenceCount3
matches
0"seemed closer the standing stones taller"
1"seemed thinnest and the ground rose in a low mound"
2"as if trying to pull the bones out through her fingers"
59.08% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches5
per1kWords1.409
wordCount3548
matches
0"not like the tidy monuments in tourist guides, but like old teeth"
1"not the park but more trees, too close together, their trunks pale in the flo"
2"not fine, but naming"
3"not in pain, Rory thought, but outrage"
4"not from longing, but rage"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount3
totalSentences467
matches
0"was that the"
1"overhead that the"
2"hated that he"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs237
mean14.97
std17.46
cv1.166
sampleLengths
09
160
232
349
418
570
69
713
83
951
1017
1165
121
132
1452
1544
169
1725
1898
1911
207
212
2285
2311
2415
253
263
2771
283
294
3063
3121
326
337
3437
354
3651
3712
388
392
4020
411
4210
4317
442
454
466
478
483
493
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount4
totalSentences437
matches
0"was gone"
1"been brought"
2"was filled"
3"was gone"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs558
matches(empty)
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount3
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences2
totalSentences467
ratio0.004
matches
0"The false Eva shrieked—not in pain, Rory thought, but outrage—and clapped both elongated hands to its face."
1"That one almost stopped her—not from longing, but rage."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount335
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount11
adverbRatio0.03283582089552239
lyAdverbCount1
lyAdverbRatio0.0029850746268656717
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences467
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences467
mean7.6
std6.44
cv0.847
sampleLengths
09
125
27
36
44
518
632
79
840
91
104
1113
122
132
1423
158
165
1730
189
1913
203
2128
2210
234
249
253
267
277
2814
2912
3010
3129
321
332
346
352
3620
3712
383
399
4015
4129
426
433
4412
4513
4617
4716
486
495
37.72% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats57
diversityRatio0.28663793103448276
totalSentences464
uniqueOpeners133
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount14
totalSentences351
matches
0"Just block letters on a"
1"Somewhere far off, traffic hissed"
2"Only the faint drip of"
3"Then, from far away, someone"
4"Only tree trunks."
5"Then, very softly, from behind"
6"Somewhere to Aurora’s left, the"
7"Then it laughed."
8"Too much blood for such"
9"Then the grove inhaled."
10"Then she was through."
11"Just oaks and undergrowth and"
12"Then her chest gave a"
13"Slowly, with a dread so"
ratio0.04
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount87
totalSentences351
matches
0"She stood at the edge"
1"She had taken her bicycle."
2"It warmed now."
3"It pulsed against her sternum"
4"Her voice sounded flat and"
5"They should not have been"
6"Her left wrist itched beneath"
7"It had done that when"
8"She took the little torch"
9"They rose from the ground"
10"She had walked this part"
11"She had delivered bao and"
12"She knew the paths, the"
13"She had come because the"
14"She had come because ever"
15"She had come because answers"
16"She slipped the torch into"
17"She could see the dark"
18"She had learned that after"
19"You could find the door"
ratio0.248
75.38% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount270
totalSentences351
matches
0"Aurora Carter had never liked"
1"The paths dissolved into black"
2"The trees leaned together."
3"Every distant movement became an"
4"She stood at the edge"
5"The delivery bag on the"
6"Yu-Fei had let her go"
7"The stones in Richmond."
8"She had taken her bicycle."
9"The note had been waiting"
10"That was the first sensible"
11"The second was that the"
12"It warmed now."
13"Aurora touched it through her"
14"It pulsed against her sternum"
15"Her voice sounded flat and"
16"The rain had stopped an"
17"Water clung to blades of"
18"A low mist moved over"
19"They should not have been"
ratio0.769
28.49% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount2
totalSentences351
matches
0"If this place had rules,"
1"If it wanted the Heartstone"
ratio0.006
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences113
technicalSentenceCount4
matches
0"Aurora touched it through her jumper, feeling the small shape under wool and coat: the deep crimson stone, no bigger than her thumbnail, hanging from its silver…"
1"She had come because ever since then, she had dreamed of a red light under ice and a woman’s voice saying the name Malphora as if it were both accusation and pr…"
2"Eva exactly, with the same low warmth, the same London roughness around the edges, the same slight lift at the end that made Rory’s name sound like both a joke …"
3"The black water spun beneath her hand, dragging at her palm as if trying to pull the bones out through her fingers."
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags18
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
15.38% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags16
fancyCount7
fancyTags
0"she muttered (mutter)"
1"she whispered (whisper)"
2"she breathed (breathe)"
3"it whispered (whisper)"
4"the false Eva snarled (snarl)"
5"she gasped (gasp)"
6"breath whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences52
tagDensity0.308
leniency0.615
rawRatio0.438
effectiveRatio0.269
85.6528%