Run: 2026-05-27-01KSMEH5J18MBDWZ6230Q2Q73K

Run Details

Duration:
36.7s
Cost:
$0.002091
Provider:
Parasail

Model input

System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Thriller genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4417" name="Tomás Herrera" aliases="Tommy, Tomás, Herrera" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Support"> <eyeColor>warm brown</eyeColor> <hair>short curly dark brown</hair> <height>5'10"</height> <age>29</age> <skinTone>olive skin</skinTone> <scar>scar running along his left forearm from a knife attack</scar> <medallion>Saint Christopher medallion around his neck</medallion> <birthplace>Seville, Spain</birthplace> <description>A former paramedic who provides off-the-books medical care for the clique.</description> <backstory>Born in Seville, Spain. He moved to London to work for the NHS but lost his license after administering unauthorized treatments to supernatural patients.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the thriller genre. A detective is pursuing a suspect through rain-soaked city streets at night. The chase takes them from the street level down into an underground market. The detective must decide whether to follow the suspect into unfamiliar and potentially dangerous territory. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>

Model response

AI
The leather soles of my boots hit wet pavement in a staccato rhythm, slicing through puddles that splashed flecks of murky water onto my trousers. He was ahead, moving with an unnatural grace towards the flickering green neon sign that promised escape but likely death. I skimmed the roofs for familiar landmarks. Camden. That meant the old carriageways were still there, hidden beneath the modern illusion of city life. My watch affirmed it was nearly midnight – past last call for most establishments but barely the beginning for others. Rain dripped steadily from my cap's brim, blurring my vision just enough to be annoying. I pushed harder, my lungs burning with each breath. He glanced back, our eyes meeting for a split second over his shoulder. The left eye was bloodshot. Not opioid junkie eyes, but something older, colder. Unnatural. "Not tonight, Herrera," I breathed, clicking my torch. The beam cut a path through the downpour as we passed the disused Tube station entrance, planks boarded over as if this were normal, everyday city decay. The guardrails at the end of the block were blocked by a concrete barrier, but Tommy appeared to slow before dissolving into shadows. Refreshing my grip on my torch, I prepared to jump, when a hand emerald from the darkness pulled me back as cleanly as a cat might hoodwink a mouse. "Lost, angel?" The accent was Spaniard, smooth with a gravel undertone. Dark curls matted against his olive-skinned forehead, but I recognized the scar immediately – Tommy's trademark. "Need to help a toucher," I said tightly, yanking my arm free. "Think your ex-partner won't mind a little overtime?" Tommy's warm brown eyes widened marginally. "Detective Quinn. Or is it Harlow tonight? Operation not marked by the book, I presume." "Where did he go?" I shoved my torch toward the blocked station entrance. "Not the climb-and-haul route." "Few don't slip through into the old carriageways," Tommy replied evenly, tapping his Saint Christopher medallion with his free hand. "Went down a dramatic hole, dark with dripping and bones." "The Veil Market?" The words felt filthy in my mouth. My late partner Morris had spoken of this place, called it a superstitious ghost story. Now I was chasing a ghost down the rabbit hole. "There's drinkable water on the scale," Tommy informed me, glancing toward the station entrance. "The bone token gets you entry past the drains. Your badge, I'm afraid, might require extra hospitality." His smile was thin, expanding without reaching his eyes. "I came down for medicine. Unlicensed. Or for consultation. Or..." He shrugged elaborately. "Stan's your man, if the token's intact and trade in something you don't mind losing." Silver pulse warmed my throat. The next words were choreographed for threat and consequence. "Not here for trading, Tommy. That suspect just leveraged me through your personal portal of hell. Either you're in this, or you give me a running start." His eyes fixed directly on my armes. "How did you find me so quickly, Detective? The ink's barely dry." He gestured with loose fingers at a blank wall, but my gaze narrowed on the distinctive bookshelf he'd indicated only by posture. One of the map-framed old engravings listed cocked at your surprise rakish angle. "Hell's a poor word for work, but necessary." Now, true hunters don't twirl their cap or grandstand; they calculate fault lines in their prey. What I remember of Tommy leaned toward scares others might not. "The token," I pressed, extending my left palm. "If he's down there, I need directions that don't involve permanently separating from my teeth." Tommy methodically sliced his forearm – surface-level enough to produce a glistening crimson line that wept into an awaiting vial. He watched the liquid fill his medical container, precise and detached as any lab technician. "Never saw firsthand," he conceded, corking a small stoppered glass vial. "Heard more stories. Hell's not a place you confirm. It's something that finds you. Your friend's heading into the center. The abandoned platform. Rarely tourists, almost never cops. You'll fit right in – they won't notice another sniffer sniffing sniffer bait." "Wasn't looking for moral support or advice, Herrera." I slid the bone token from his outstretched palm, its oily feel sending chills despite the drizzly warmth. "Just transaction. Where's the bolt-hole?" "Through the history room," Tommy nodded toward the back alley walls again precisely, his body tensed by conversation end. "Don't touch the wood. Don't remark on the food smells. Don't, he advised with equality opportunistic intensity toward the closing rick from that would cower others, ask prurient questions about the old trades." I rounded the corner to seek the hidden entrance, peripheral movement revealing it. Black. Complete black said otherwise, I could define its depth. "Explain how to find him again but make it quick." "Old platform five," Tommy confirmed, dark curls flopped over his closed eyes. Saint Christopher swung gently. "Dragons make you nervous?" I stuffed the bone token into my trouser pocket as the distinct smell of incense and something feral curled from within the dirt and grime echoes beyond. "Scared shitless. Spare me the parade route." "Safe journey, Detective," Tommy concluded, unlocking his carry-bag at belt-level. "If you see a heartramp, flatter it react stun underlap." The passageway yawned nearby me – cavernous, seemingly organic in its growth. Stone uneven in tread gave way to older flagstone still bearing tramden polish from centuries past. Despite the darkness, shadows skittered independently of any light source. Someone was preparing ahead, ensuring my solitary preparations. Fifteen steps down, the concentric humid grime around slowly vanished into clearer sunken night. London's underground world stretched much grander than plotting maps could suggest. Limestone and brick grew into structures not found on surface-level uniforms. I trailed stubbled fingers on matching cold walls, canal water underlying satisfyingly catered secret lake. The Veil Market stretched horriblingly ahead. At this depth, impossible weather permeated – windless environment fainted of ash. Almighty cavern of caves nested where morning never touched, hung above. Deep, rich souls of trade layers not words. The market itself was pandemonium back-room. "Switch," I tapped the bone token against the pock-marked brick wall. "Right off protocol cases, Morris." Visceral twisting in my chest tied prompts, welcoming earlier safety. I hadn't stepped beyond TM into official territory – not quite official. Unfunctional stands cluttered the crease cautiously, shaded from view. Starleless darkness exists in ways surface-level knowledge can't process. Soaked hair clung to temple cheeks, cold reminding my introduction modern dangers negligible here. The people here moved differently. Their shoulders dropped against gravity. Eyes adjusted instantly to limitation while my head focus twisted. No lights – stone provided contrasts sufficient for vision contrary to official safety requirements. And the smells... coppery corruption, chemical nightshades, the unwashed freshness of supernatural vitality dead cutting into musty earth. "Where?" I breathed, torch deactivated in precaution against drawing attention. Distraction bucks could go haywire easily here. "The deep platform," whispered a toddler illusion nearby, appearing and vanishing amidst mirrors and murky bends.
created_at"2026-05-27T10:08:53.859Z" 5/27/2026, 10:08:53 AM
model"thedrummer/cydonia-24b-v4.1"
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generation_time36626
tokens_prompt4663
tokens_completion1928
native_tokens_prompt4289
native_tokens_completion1608
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning0
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
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web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
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usage0.0020907
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is_byokfalse
latency555
model_permaslug"thedrummer/cydonia-24b-v4.1"
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Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
42.11% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags19
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"I said tightly [tightly]"
1"Tommy replied evenly [evenly]"
2"He shrugged elaborately [elaborately]"
dialogueSentences35
tagDensity0.543
leniency1
rawRatio0.158
effectiveRatio0.158
74.18% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount1162
totalAiIsmAdverbs6
found
0
adverb"tightly"
count1
1
adverb"quickly"
count1
2
adverb"precisely"
count1
3
adverb"gently"
count1
4
adverb"slowly"
count1
5
adverb"cautiously"
count1
highlights
0"tightly"
1"quickly"
2"precisely"
3"gently"
4"slowly"
5"cautiously"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
56.97% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount1162
totalAiIsms10
found
0
word"familiar"
count1
1
word"pulse"
count1
2
word"calculate"
count1
3
word"glistening"
count1
4
word"warmth"
count1
5
word"intensity"
count1
6
word"echoes"
count1
7
word"ensuring"
count1
8
word"solitary"
count1
9
word"amidst"
count1
highlights
0"familiar"
1"pulse"
2"calculate"
3"glistening"
4"warmth"
5"intensity"
6"echoes"
7"ensuring"
8"solitary"
9"amidst"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"eyes widened/narrowed"
count1
highlights
0"eyes widened"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences76
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount1
hedgeCount1
narrationSentences76
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches
0"appeared to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences91
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen40
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords1170
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions14
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
66.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions24
wordCount855
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity1.17
worstName"Tommy"
maxWindowNameDensity3
worstWindowName"Tommy"
discoveredNames
Tube1
Tommy10
Spaniard1
Dark1
Saint2
Christopher2
Morris1
Silver1
One1
Veil1
Market1
Visceral1
Distraction1
persons
0"Tommy"
1"Spaniard"
2"Dark"
3"Saint"
4"Christopher"
5"Morris"
6"Market"
7"Visceral"
places(empty)
globalScore0.915
windowScore0.667
73.08% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences65
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"e – cavernous, seemingly organic in its grow"
1"not quite official"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.855
wordCount1170
matches
0"Not opioid junkie eyes, but something older, colder"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences91
matches(empty)
81.31% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs29
mean40.34
std17.53
cv0.435
sampleLengths
045
144
251
335
452
527
620
721
817
930
1035
1168
1241
1362
1450
1587
1631
1752
1833
1920
2034
2120
2246
2351
2443
2570
2652
2717
2816
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount1
totalSentences76
matches
0"were blocked"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount2
totalVerbs144
matches
0"was chasing"
1"was preparing"
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount7
semicolonCount1
flaggedSentences8
totalSentences91
ratio0.088
matches
0"My watch affirmed it was nearly midnight – past last call for most establishments but barely the beginning for others."
1"Dark curls matted against his olive-skinned forehead, but I recognized the scar immediately – Tommy's trademark."
2"Now, true hunters don't twirl their cap or grandstand; they calculate fault lines in their prey."
3"Tommy methodically sliced his forearm – surface-level enough to produce a glistening crimson line that wept into an awaiting vial."
4"The passageway yawned nearby me – cavernous, seemingly organic in its growth."
5"At this depth, impossible weather permeated – windless environment fainted of ash."
6"I hadn't stepped beyond TM into official territory – not quite official."
7"No lights – stone provided contrasts sufficient for vision contrary to official safety requirements."
91.38% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount857
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount30
adverbRatio0.03500583430571762
lyAdverbCount26
lyAdverbRatio0.030338389731621937
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences91
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences91
mean12.86
std7.5
cv0.583
sampleLengths
025
120
27
31
416
520
615
79
813
95
108
111
128
1327
1423
1529
1611
1716
1812
198
206
2115
2213
234
2420
2510
2610
2715
2810
2914
3026
3113
3215
335
349
3527
367
3734
3813
398
4016
4111
428
4315
4420
4515
4611
4741
4826
495
98.90% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats1
diversityRatio0.6923076923076923
totalSentences91
uniqueOpeners63
0.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount0
totalSentences73
matches(empty)
ratio0
88.49% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount24
totalSentences73
matches
0"He was ahead, moving with"
1"I skimmed the roofs for"
2"My watch affirmed it was"
3"I pushed harder, my lungs"
4"He glanced back, our eyes"
5"I breathed, clicking my torch"
6"I said tightly, yanking my"
7"I shoved my torch toward"
8"My late partner Morris had"
9"His smile was thin, expanding"
10"He shrugged elaborately"
11"His eyes fixed directly on"
12"He gestured with loose fingers"
13"I pressed, extending my left"
14"He watched the liquid fill"
15"he conceded, corking a small"
16"I slid the bone token"
17"I rounded the corner to"
18"I stuffed the bone token"
19"I trailed stubbled fingers on"
ratio0.329
100.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount52
totalSentences73
matches
0"The leather soles of my"
1"He was ahead, moving with"
2"I skimmed the roofs for"
3"That meant the old carriageways"
4"My watch affirmed it was"
5"Rain dripped steadily from my"
6"I pushed harder, my lungs"
7"He glanced back, our eyes"
8"The left eye was bloodshot."
9"I breathed, clicking my torch"
10"The beam cut a path"
11"The guardrails at the end"
12"The accent was Spaniard, smooth"
13"I said tightly, yanking my"
14"Tommy's warm brown eyes widened"
15"I shoved my torch toward"
16"Tommy replied evenly, tapping his"
17"The words felt filthy in"
18"My late partner Morris had"
19"Tommy informed me, glancing toward"
ratio0.712
100.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount2
totalSentences73
matches
0"Now I was chasing a"
1"Now, true hunters don't twirl"
ratio0.027
37.82% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences34
technicalSentenceCount5
matches
0"The leather soles of my boots hit wet pavement in a staccato rhythm, slicing through puddles that splashed flecks of murky water onto my trousers."
1"He was ahead, moving with an unnatural grace towards the flickering green neon sign that promised escape but likely death."
2"Rain dripped steadily from my cap's brim, blurring my vision just enough to be annoying."
3"The beam cut a path through the downpour as we passed the disused Tube station entrance, planks boarded over as if this were normal, everyday city decay."
4"Tommy methodically sliced his forearm – surface-level enough to produce a glistening crimson line that wept into an awaiting vial."
72.37% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags19
uselessAdditionCount2
matches
0"He gestured, but my gaze narrowed on the distinctive bookshelf he'd indicated only by posture"
1"I slid, its oily feel sending chills despite the drizzly warmth"
0.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags10
fancyCount8
fancyTags
0"I breathed (breathe)"
1"Tommy informed (inform)"
2"I pressed (press)"
3"he conceded (concede)"
4"Tommy confirmed (confirm)"
5"Tommy concluded (conclude)"
6"I breathed (breathe)"
7"whispered a toddler illusion nearby (whisper)"
dialogueSentences35
tagDensity0.286
leniency0.571
rawRatio0.8
effectiveRatio0.457
79.4424%