Run: 2026-07-09-01KX403XY1BXJRHXCBB540G77V

“Children’s parties are a soft target,” Molly said, peering through binoculars at the bungalow across the street. “Nobody expects criminal genius between the jelly and the inflatable castle.” Bill adjusted his ski mask, which was knitted with tiny pink unicorns. “I still think the mask sends mixed signals.” “It says we’re dangerous, but whimsical.” “It says my aunt made it.” “Your aunt has a gift for intimidation.” Across the road, balloons bobbed over the garden fence. A banner read HAPPY 6TH BIRTHDAY, OLIVER! One balloon had already escaped and was floating toward a telephone wire with the despairing freedom of a man avoiding responsibility. Bill unfolded a crayon-covered map. “Right. We enter through the side gate at fourteen hundred hours.” “Two o’clock.” “Professional thieves use military time.” “Professional thieves don’t write their blueprints in washable marker.” “The child dropped it in the park. It’s reconnaissance material.” “It’s a drawing of a dinosaur eating a police car.” “Exactly. It reveals the boy’s fears.” “It reveals he likes dinosaurs.” “Same thing.” Molly lowered the binoculars. “What’s the present situation?” “According to the invitation, each guest brings one gift.” “And how many guests?” “Twenty-three confirmed. Plus grandparents.” “Grandparents bring cash.” “Grandparents bring envelopes. Envelopes are difficult to fence.” “We’re not fencing children’s birthday money, Bill.” “Then what are we stealing?” “The presents.” “For what?” Molly paused. “For criminal reasons.” Bill squinted at the house. “You don’t have a buyer, do you?” “I have options.” “You said that about the antique spoons.” “Those spoons were valuable.” “We ate beans with them for six months.” “Luxury beans.” A shriek came from the garden as a child fell out of the bouncy castle and bounced directly into a hedge. Bill winced. “Security is tighter than I expected.” “That was a six-year-old in a Batman cape.” “Exactly. Batman cape. Vigilante culture starts young.” Molly opened the boot of their van. Inside sat a trolley, two empty laundry baskets, a smoke machine, and a cardboard box labelled DEFINITELY NOT STOLEN PUPPETS. “What’s the smoke machine for?” Bill asked. “Distraction.” “At a children’s party?” “Children love smoke.” “Parents hate smoke.” “Parents hate everything. That’s why they drink prosecco before noon.” Bill picked up a party hat from the dashboard. “What’s our cover?” “We’re entertainers.” “You’re a forty-year-old woman with a crowbar in your handbag.” “I’m a magician.” “And me?” “You’re my assistant.” “I don’t want to be a magician’s assistant.” “You’re wearing a unicorn ski mask.” “It’s cold.” “It’s July.” Bill sighed and put on the party hat. “What’s my stage name?” “Bill.” “That’s not a stage name.” “It’s honest.” “It’s not even threatening.” “Fine. The Amazing Bill.” “The Amazing Bill what?” “The Amazing Bill Who Definitely Doesn’t Need To Ask Where The Presents Are.” Bill nodded slowly. “That has a certain rhythm.” “Good. We go in, perform a trick, locate the gift table, load everything into the laundry baskets, and vanish.” “What trick?” Molly pulled a pack of cards from her pocket. “Can you do card tricks?” “No.” “Then why have cards?” “To look prepared.” “What if they ask you to do one?” “I’ll accuse them of ruining the magic.” Bill stared at her. “That’s your plan?” “It’s a children’s party. Standards are low. Last year Oliver cried because a clown made a balloon sausage.” “Maybe it was a poor sausage.” “It had eyes, Bill.” They crossed the road carrying the trolley. At the side gate, Molly stopped. “One more thing,” she whispered. “No unnecessary cruelty.” “Obviously.” “No taking a child’s favourite toy.” “How will we know which one is their favourite?” “If they scream ‘That’s my favourite toy!’ put it back.” “Reasonable.” “And no stealing birthday cake.” Bill looked offended. “I’m a thief, Molly. Not a monster.” The gate creaked open. From the garden came a chorus of small voices. “MAGIC LADY! MAGIC LADY!” Molly froze. Bill grinned. “They’ve heard of you.” “They absolutely have not.” A child in a pirate hat ran toward them. “Are you here for Oliver’s birthday?” Molly smiled brightly. “Yes. We’re here to make the presents disappear.” Bill coughed. The child clapped. “Brilliant!”