Run: 2026-07-09-01KX40804PH1XS6EXWMCRAJH2T

Molly crouched behind the hedge, peering through a gap in the birthday banners. The garden beyond glittered with balloons, paper crowns, and a table groaning beneath presents wrapped in dinosaurs, princesses, and one aggressively festive roll of pirate paper. Bill adjusted his black wool cap. “I’m just saying, this feels morally complicated.” “It’s theft, Bill. Morally complicated is the brochure.” “They’re children.” “They’re rich children. Look at that trampoline. It has a safety net.” “A safety net doesn’t prove wealth.” “It has a ladder.” Bill studied the trampoline. “That is a compelling point.” Molly unfolded a crumpled map. “Operation Pinata begins at fourteen hundred hours. The parents are distracted by cake. The children are distracted by sugar. We enter through the side gate, liberate the presents, and vanish through the alley.” Bill squinted at the map. “Why have you drawn a dragon?” “That’s the bouncy castle.” “And the skull?” “That’s the dog.” “There’s a dog?” “Tiny one. Ribbon on its head. Probably named Lord Biscuit.” “I don’t trust dogs with titles.” “You don’t trust dogs without titles.” “Correct. Untitled dogs have nothing to lose.” A shriek erupted from the garden as a clown produced a rabbit from a hat. Bill flinched. “What was that?” he whispered. “Entertainment.” “Looked like sorcery.” “Focus. We need disguises.” Bill opened his coat. Inside were two paper party hats, a plastic tiara, and a false moustache. Molly stared. “Why is there a moustache?” “I thought I could be somebody’s uncle.” “You look forty-seven in that moustache.” “I’m thirty-nine.” “You look fifty-two without it.” Bill nodded thoughtfully. “The moustache is working, then.” Molly snatched the tiara. “I’ll go as a princess.” “And me?” “You’re a magician’s assistant.” “I don’t want to be a magician’s assistant.” “You brought the moustache, Bill. You’ve surrendered voting rights.” They slipped through the gate just as the clown began twisting balloons. Molly marched confidently toward the gift table, waving at no one in particular. “Remember,” she murmured, “act natural.” Bill immediately tripped over a garden gnome. A nearby child pointed. “Mum! That man kicked the wizard!” Bill clutched his ankle. “It attacked first.” Molly grabbed his collar and smiled at the child. “He’s doing a funny walk.” “I’m not,” Bill hissed. “You are now.” Bill began limping in a circle, throwing his arms up. The child burst into delighted laughter. “Brilliant,” Molly said through clenched teeth. “Keep dancing. Create a diversion.” “I can’t dance under pressure.” “You’re stealing birthday presents under pressure.” “That’s different. Presents don’t judge.” Molly reached the table. “Right. Bags out.” Bill stopped dancing and produced a large sack. “This one says ‘Laundry.’” “Perfect.” “It also has laundry in it.” “Less perfect.” They began loading presents. A teddy bear. A boxed microscope. Three identical games called Unicorn Emergency. Molly lifted a huge parcel shaped like a bicycle helmet. Bill frowned. “What if these are all terrible gifts?” “Then we sell them to terrible people.” A woman in a floral dress approached. “Excuse me, are you with the party?” Molly smiled brightly. “Absolutely.” “Whose parents are you?” Bill froze. Molly patted his arm. “We’re little Jasper’s godparents.” The woman looked doubtful. “There isn’t a Jasper.” “Then we’re doing a terrible job.” Bill leaned forward. “It’s a complicated custody arrangement.” The woman blinked. “I’m the birthday girl’s mother.” Molly grabbed the laundry sack. “Happy birthday to her!” They bolted. Bill crashed through the side gate, Molly behind him, the sack snagging on a balloon arch. Balloons exploded in a rapid series of pops. From the garden came the children’s cheering. Bill wheezed as they reached the alley. “They think we’re part of the entertainment.” Molly grinned, hauling the sack free. “Best review we’ve ever had.” Bill looked inside. “Molly.” “What?” “We stole the clown’s props.” Molly examined the sack. It contained rubber chickens, juggling pins, and a fake bouquet that squirted water. Bill sighed. “Morally complicated and financially disastrous.” Molly pulled on the plastic tiara. “At least nobody got hurt.” A rubber chicken honked from the sack. Bill nodded. “The wizard might disagree.”