Run: 2026-07-25-01KYD70NWF14C79SKEHXA20G08

Run Details

Duration:
14.8s
Cost:
$0.000418
Provider:
Poolside

Model input

System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Thriller genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4417" name="Tomás Herrera" aliases="Tommy, Tomás, Herrera" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Support"> <eyeColor>warm brown</eyeColor> <hair>short curly dark brown</hair> <height>5'10"</height> <age>29</age> <skinTone>olive skin</skinTone> <scar>scar running along his left forearm from a knife attack</scar> <medallion>Saint Christopher medallion around his neck</medallion> <birthplace>Seville, Spain</birthplace> <description>A former paramedic who provides off-the-books medical care for the clique.</description> <backstory>Born in Seville, Spain. He moved to London to work for the NHS but lost his license after administering unauthorized treatments to supernatural patients.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the thriller genre. A detective is pursuing a suspect through rain-soaked city streets at night. The chase takes them from the street level down into an underground market. The detective must decide whether to follow the suspect into unfamiliar and potentially dangerous territory. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>

Model response

AI
The rain hammered the pavement like a thousand fists. Quinn’s boots slapped against the slick asphalt, her breath a ragged plume in the nocturnal air. Tomás Herrera was a blur of olive skin and dark curls, weaving through the Soho streets with the fluid grace of someone who’d spent years dodging ambulances and chaos. She nearly lost him at the corner, her gloved hand gripping the worn leather watch on her wrist—a habit from her old partner, DS Morris. *Focus*, she told herself, the words useless against the ache in her chest. Three years. Three years since the rain had turned red, and the case had gone cold. He ducked into The Raven’s Nest. The green neon sign flickered above the doorway, casting an eerie glow across the wet cobblestones. Quinn didn’t hesitate. She stepped inside, the warmth of the bar wrapping around her like a cloak. The walls were lined with black-and-white photographs, their faces blurred by decades of smoke and time. Maps hung crookedly—London’s forgotten districts, marked with red ink that might have been blood. Tomás was already at the bar, his back to her. A scar traced his forearm, exposed when he’d shrugged off his jacket. The bartender, a grizzled man with a beard like storm clouds, poured him a whiskey without asking. Quinn slid onto the stool beside him. “Herrera.” He didn’t flinch. “Detective Quinn. Still playing detective, I see.” His accent curled around the words like smoke. “You’re late.” “Wouldn’t miss the show.” She studied his face. The Saint Christopher medallion peeking beneath his shirt collar. A prayer for safety, or a warning? “The clique’s moving something tonight. The Veil Market opens on the full moon.” Tomás laughed, low and bitter. “Always the prophet, aren’t you?” He slid a coin across the bar—tarnished, ancient. “Bone token. You know the rules.” The bartender glanced at her, then at the coin. “Need a token, love.” Quinn’s jaw tightened. She’d heard the stories about the Market. Bodies found drained of something vital, their eyes glassy and vacant. The police had closed the case each time, chalked up to “ecstasy overdoses” or “unknown toxins.” She’d lost DS Morris to something that wouldn’t die in a morgue. “Where’s the exit?” she asked. Tomás’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Depends. Do you want to see what’s really out there, Detective?” He nodded toward a bookshelf behind the bar—*The Raven’s Nest*—where a single volume of *The Iliad* sat slightly askew. Her hand drifted to her service weapon. Protocol said stay outside, stay in the light. But Morris’s voice echoed in her skull: *“Some shadows don’t forgive the light.”* The book swung open, revealing a slit in the shelf. A staircase spiralled downward, slick with moisture. Tomás lingered at the entrance. “You always were a follower, Quinn. Even when you should’ve been leading.” She pushed past him. The basement reeked of damp stone and something else—sulfur, maybe, or old blood. The bone token clinked against her palm. She pressed it into the slot in the wall, and the floor shuddered. A new passage yawned open, revealing a tunnel choked with mist. *Move.* The air thickened as she descended, the token’s warmth fading against her skin. The tunnel opened into a cavernous space lit by phosphorescent fungi and the flicker of cursed candles. Stalls stretched into darkness, selling vials of glowing liquid, masks with too many eyes, and contracts written in languages that made her teeth ache. Tomás stood at the centre of it all, arms spread like a conductor. “Welcome to the real world, Detective.” A figure in a coat stitched from raven feathers emerged from the shadows, his face obscured. “Herrera. You brought the dog.” “She’s not a dog.” “Not yet.” The man’s voice was a rasp. “But she will be.” Quinn’s finger twitched toward her holster. “This ends tonight.” The raven-masked figure laughed. “Does it? Or does it just begin?” He gestured to the crowd—faceless silhouettes trading in secrets, in souls. “The Market doesn’t forget, Detective. Do you?” She saw Morris’s face in the crowd, or maybe it was a trick of the light. His badge, half-buried in ash. “Where’s the ritual?” she growled. “In six minutes.” Tomás stepped closer, the scar on his forearm gleaming. “At the old chapel in Highgate. But first…” He plucked a syringe from his jacket. “A little medical attention. For your nightmares.” Quinn drew her gun. “You’re not the one running, Herrera.” “No.” His smile sharpened. “But I’m the one who’ll decide who bleeds first.” The syringe flashed in the torchlight. She fired. The shot echoed like a gunshot in a cathedral. The raven-masked figure dissolved into the crowd, his laughter trailing like smoke. Tomás stumbled back, clutching his arm, the syringe clattering to the floor. “Not the blood,” he gasped. “The bone—” The tunnel behind her collapsed in a shower of stone. Quinn turned, her heel catching on something sharp. Pain lanced up her leg. She looked down to see a bone shard embedded in her boot—Morris’s watch, its chain wrapped around it like a serpent. The Market’s heartbeat thrummed around her, patient. Waiting. Tomás was gone. And the only way out was forward.
created_at"2026-07-25T18:01:21.565Z" 7/25/2026, 6:01:21 PM
model"poolside/laguna-xs-2.1-20260625"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency102
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time472
tokens_prompt4484
tokens_completion2568
native_tokens_prompt4510
native_tokens_completion2349
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning1013
native_tokens_cached4496
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
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usage0.0004176
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endpoint_id"089ec178-f6dc-4450-aff5-46f68798ce97"
id"chatcmpl-0b4a21e3eda743e69dc7c30839883ed3"
is_byokfalse
latency102
model_permaslug"poolside/laguna-xs-2.1-20260625"
provider_name"Poolside"
status200
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provider_name"Poolside"
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data_region"global"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags13
adverbTagCount1
adverbTags
0"His accent curled around [around]"
dialogueSentences30
tagDensity0.433
leniency0.867
rawRatio0.077
effectiveRatio0.067
88.45% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount866
totalAiIsmAdverbs2
found
0
adverb"really"
count1
1
adverb"slightly"
count1
highlights
0"really"
1"slightly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
53.81% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount866
totalAiIsms8
found
0
word"flickered"
count1
1
word"warmth"
count2
2
word"traced"
count1
3
word"echoed"
count2
4
word"flicker"
count1
5
word"gleaming"
count1
highlights
0"flickered"
1"warmth"
2"traced"
3"echoed"
4"flicker"
5"gleaming"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences74
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences74
filterMatches
0"watch"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences90
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen30
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans5
markdownWords13
totalWords860
ratio0.015
matches
0"Focus"
1"The Raven’s Nest"
2"The Iliad"
3"“Some shadows don’t forgive the light.”"
4"Move."
62.50% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions4
unquotedAttributions1
matches
0"*Focus*, she told herself, the words useless against the ache in her chest."
85.90% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions32
wordCount702
uniqueNames11
maxNameDensity1.28
worstName"Tomás"
maxWindowNameDensity2
worstWindowName"Tomás"
discoveredNames
Herrera1
Soho1
Morris5
Raven2
Nest2
London1
Saint1
Christopher1
Market2
Tomás9
Quinn7
persons
0"Herrera"
1"Morris"
2"Saint"
3"Christopher"
4"Market"
5"Tomás"
6"Quinn"
places
0"Soho"
1"Raven"
2"London"
globalScore0.859
windowScore1
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences54
glossingSentenceCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches0
per1kWords0
wordCount860
matches(empty)
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount0
totalSentences90
matches(empty)
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs38
mean22.63
std21.25
cv0.939
sampleLengths
0108
16
263
339
48
520
637
724
813
949
105
1136
1228
1334
144
1544
161
1754
1819
1921
204
2112
229
2329
2421
255
2634
2710
2813
296
302
3133
327
3310
3434
358
363
377
95.78% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount2
totalSentences74
matches
0"were lined"
1"was gone"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount0
totalVerbs120
matches(empty)
0.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount8
semicolonCount0
flaggedSentences7
totalSentences90
ratio0.078
matches
0"She nearly lost him at the corner, her gloved hand gripping the worn leather watch on her wrist—a habit from her old partner, DS Morris."
1"Maps hung crookedly—London’s forgotten districts, marked with red ink that might have been blood."
2"“Always the prophet, aren’t you?” He slid a coin across the bar—tarnished, ancient."
3"“Depends. Do you want to see what’s really out there, Detective?” He nodded toward a bookshelf behind the bar—*The Raven’s Nest*—where a single volume of *The Iliad* sat slightly askew."
4"The basement reeked of damp stone and something else—sulfur, maybe, or old blood."
5"“Does it? Or does it just begin?” He gestured to the crowd—faceless silhouettes trading in secrets, in souls."
6"She looked down to see a bone shard embedded in her boot—Morris’s watch, its chain wrapped around it like a serpent."
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount713
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount18
adverbRatio0.025245441795231416
lyAdverbCount4
lyAdverbRatio0.005610098176718092
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences90
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences90
mean9.56
std6.29
cv0.658
sampleLengths
09
116
229
325
413
52
614
76
816
93
1014
1116
1214
1310
1412
1517
167
171
183
1915
202
218
229
237
2413
255
2613
276
289
294
303
317
3211
3328
345
356
3630
377
388
3913
4010
417
425
4312
444
4513
467
4713
4811
491
59.26% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats5
diversityRatio0.3888888888888889
totalSentences90
uniqueOpeners35
0.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount0
totalSentences67
matches(empty)
ratio0
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount18
totalSentences67
matches
0"She nearly lost him at"
1"He ducked into The Raven’s"
2"She stepped inside, the warmth"
3"He didn’t flinch."
4"His accent curled around the"
5"She studied his face"
6"He slid a coin across"
7"She’d heard the stories about"
8"He nodded toward a bookshelf"
9"Her hand drifted to her"
10"She pushed past him."
11"She pressed it into the"
12"He gestured to the crowd—faceless"
13"She saw Morris’s face in"
14"His badge, half-buried in ash."
15"He plucked a syringe from"
16"His smile sharpened"
17"She looked down to see"
ratio0.269
0.00% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount63
totalSentences67
matches
0"The rain hammered the pavement"
1"Quinn’s boots slapped against the"
2"Tomás Herrera was a blur"
3"She nearly lost him at"
4"He ducked into The Raven’s"
5"The green neon sign flickered"
6"Quinn didn’t hesitate."
7"She stepped inside, the warmth"
8"The walls were lined with"
9"Maps hung crookedly—London’s forgotten districts,"
10"Tomás was already at the"
11"A scar traced his forearm,"
12"The bartender, a grizzled man"
13"Quinn slid onto the stool"
14"He didn’t flinch."
15"His accent curled around the"
16"She studied his face"
17"The Saint Christopher medallion peeking"
18"A prayer for safety, or"
19"Tomás laughed, low and bitter."
ratio0.94
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences67
matches(empty)
ratio0
63.49% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences27
technicalSentenceCount3
matches
0"Tomás Herrera was a blur of olive skin and dark curls, weaving through the Soho streets with the fluid grace of someone who’d spent years dodging ambulances and…"
1"Maps hung crookedly—London’s forgotten districts, marked with red ink that might have been blood."
2"Stalls stretched into darkness, selling vials of glowing liquid, masks with too many eyes, and contracts written in languages that made her teeth ache."
86.54% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags13
uselessAdditionCount1
matches
0"He slid, ancient"
83.33% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags3
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"she growled (growl)"
1"he gasped (gasp)"
dialogueSentences30
tagDensity0.1
leniency0.2
rawRatio0.667
effectiveRatio0.133
79.3021%