Run: 2026-07-25-01KYD7H04AJNGP9YV7E75XM168

Run Details

Duration:
2m 57s
Cost:
$0.074864
Provider:
Moonshot AI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4413" name="Silas Blackwood" aliases="Silas, Si, the Spymaster" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Mentor"> <eyeColor>hazel</eyeColor> <hair>grey-streaked auburn</hair> <height>6'1"</height> <age>58</age> <beard>neatly trimmed, matching his grey-streaked auburn hair</beard> <limp>slight limp in his left leg from an old knee injury</limp> <signetRing>silver signet ring, always worn on his right hand</signetRing> <description>Silas is a retired intelligence operative turned bar owner. He carries himself with quiet authority.</description> <backstory>Former MI6 field agent who retired after a botched operation in Prague left him with a permanent knee injury. He opened "The Raven's Nest" bar in Soho as a front for his network of contacts.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the literary fiction genre. Two old friends who haven't seen each other in years run into each other unexpectedly at a bar. One of them has changed significantly. Through their conversation and the tension between who they were and who they've become, reveal the weight of time and unspoken regret. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The green neon above The Raven’s Nest had begun to flicker by the time Rory pushed through the door, turning the rain-washed pavement outside into brief intervals of emerald and black. She carried the damp with her: in the ends of her hair, in the cuffs of her jeans, in the chill that had settled beneath her collar after the last delivery of the night. Yu-Fei had sent her across half the West End with three paper bags of dumplings and a warning not to accept another sob story about forgotten cash. Rory had returned soaked, under-tipped, and too tired to climb the narrow stairs to her flat before sitting somewhere warm. Silas looked up from behind the bar. He was polishing a glass with the slow, deliberate attention of a man cleaning a weapon. “You look like something the Thames coughed up,” he said. “Good evening to you too.” He set the glass down and reached for another. His silver signet ring caught the low light as he moved. “Tea or whisky?” Rory considered lying, then abandoned the effort. “Tea.” “Mm.” He limped toward the back counter. “That tired, then.” She dropped her courier bag beside an empty stool and shrugged out of her jacket. The bar was nearly deserted. A man in a dark coat nursed a pint beneath a framed photograph of Berlin before the Wall came down; two women whispered over gin near the door. Rain pressed softly against the windows, blurring the neon outside. On the far wall, between maps of Lisbon and Vienna, a black-and-white photograph showed three soldiers laughing outside a bombed café. Rory had asked Silas about it once. He had told her only that the man on the left had owed him money. She was reaching for the tea Silas set before her when the door opened again. A woman entered with the rain still shining on her coat. She wore charcoal wool, beautifully cut, and carried an umbrella furled so neatly it looked like an instrument. Her hair, once a reckless mass of dark curls, had been straightened and pinned at the nape of her neck. She paused beneath the green glow from the window, searching the room with the careful uncertainty of someone who had arrived expecting another place. Rory knew the shape of her mouth before she knew the rest of her. The woman turned. For a second neither of them moved. Then Eva said, “Oh my God.” Rory’s hand tightened around her mug. The tea scalded her fingers. Eva crossed the room quickly, heels striking the old floorboards, and stopped two feet away as if some invisible boundary had risen between them. Up close, her face was thinner. There were fine lines at the corners of her eyes, and a small pearl gleamed in each earlobe. The girl who had once dyed a streak of her hair blue with ink stolen from a Cardiff stationer’s had vanished so completely that Rory felt a brief, irrational urge to look behind her. “Rory,” Eva said. “Eva.” The name came out rusted from disuse. Eva laughed once, breathless. “I thought it was you, but then I thought—” She stopped. Her gaze moved over Rory’s damp hair, the faded Golden Empress logo on her jacket, the crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist. “I wasn’t sure.” “I’ve changed that much?” “No.” Eva’s answer came too quickly. “No, you look—” She faltered, and Rory saw the lie trembling there. “You look well.” Silas set a second glass on the bar. “Would your friend like a drink?” Eva glanced at him. Something in her expression shifted, an old reflex making room for courtesy. “Red wine, if you have it.” “We have it,” Silas said, in a tone suggesting he had wine older and more interesting than most of his customers. Eva sat on the stool beside Rory. Up close she smelled of rain, perfume, and dry cleaning. It was so unlike the Eva Rory remembered—cigarette smoke, vanilla lip balm, the chemical sweetness of hair dye—that she had to look away. “How long has it been?” Eva asked. “Seven years.” “Eight.” Eva wrapped her hands around the glass Silas gave her but did not drink. “You disappeared in October. It was snowing by the time I realised you weren’t coming back.” Rory stared into her tea. “I did come back.” “To Cardiff? Once, for your grandmother’s funeral. I wasn’t invited.” There it was: the small, clean blade slipped between them. Rory felt it with a precision that surprised her. “I didn’t know you’d want to be.” “Why wouldn’t I?” Rory lifted one shoulder. “We hadn’t spoken in two years.” “You hadn’t spoken in two years,” Eva said. “I called.” “I know.” “I wrote.” “I know.” “And you let all of it sit.” Silas moved down the bar with the quiet discretion of a man who understood when to become furniture. The couple near the door left. Rain ticked against the glass. Rory traced the rim of her mug. “I didn’t know what to say.” “Thank you might have done.” The words were not loud. They were worse for that. Rory looked at her. “Thank you?” Eva’s face closed. “Forget it.” “No, go on.” “I said forget it.” “You wanted me to thank you for telling me to run?” “I wanted you to thank me for finding you somewhere to go. For getting you out before Evan put you in hospital. For—” Eva stopped, pressed her lips together, and took a sip of wine. “Forget it.” The old name entered the room and stood between them. Rory became aware of the scar on her wrist, pale and curved like a sliver of moon. Evan had not caused that one. She had fallen from a bicycle when she was nine, racing Eva down a lane behind the school. But Evan had liked to hold her wrist there, thumb pressing into the little scar, as if he owned even the injuries that predated him. “He never put me in hospital,” Rory said. Eva stared at her. “Is that the standard we’re using?” “I’m saying I left.” “Because I told you to.” “Because I decided to.” For an instant Eva looked eighteen again, furious and wounded and trying not to cry. Then the expression vanished beneath something smoother. She set down her wine. “You always had to make it sound as if you’d rescued yourself.” Rory’s anger arrived cleanly, almost gratefully. “And you always had to be at the centre of the rescue.” The old clock above the shelves ticked. At the other end of the bar, Silas turned the page of a newspaper without reading it. Eva looked down at her hands. Her nails were short, pale, immaculate. A slim gold ring encircled the third finger of her left hand. Rory saw it and felt the years open wider. “You’re married,” she said. Eva followed her gaze. “Divorced.” “Oh.” “You sound relieved.” “I don’t.” “You do. You always were terrible at hiding that.” Eva turned the ring once around her finger. “His name was Daniel. He was kind. That was the problem, probably. I kept waiting for kindness to become something else.” Rory did not know what to say to that. She looked at the wine in Eva’s glass, at the dark surface trembling with the movement of her hand. “I’m sorry,” she said. Eva gave a small shrug. “Don’t be. We got a very nice flat in Highgate out of it.” She glanced around The Raven’s Nest, taking in the maps, the dim lamps, the photographs. “Do you live here?” “Above it.” “With him?” “No. Silas owns the building.” “And the restaurant jacket?” “I work for Golden Empress.” “As a delivery driver?” “Yes.” Eva nodded slowly. Rory felt heat rise in her face. “Say it.” “Say what?” “Whatever you’re thinking.” “I was thinking you must know the city better than I do.” “No, you weren’t.” Eva’s gaze sharpened. “Fine. I was wondering how Aurora Carter, who could dismantle a prosecution argument before breakfast, ended up carrying dumplings through Soho.” The use of her full name landed strangely. No one called her Aurora except her mother when angry. “I didn’t want to be a barrister,” Rory said. “You didn’t want to be the barrister your father wanted.” “Is there a difference?” “Yes. One is a choice. The other is a tantrum you stretched into a decade.” Rory went still. Eva drew a breath. “I shouldn’t have said that.” “No. You’ve become very good at that, haven’t you? Saying exactly the right cruel thing and then apologising before anyone can answer it.” “Have I?” “You were always good at it.” They sat in silence. Eva’s composure, so polished at first, had begun to crack at the edges. She was holding her glass too tightly. Rory remembered that. Eva used to grip pens the same way during exams, until the plastic bent. “What do you do now?” Rory asked. “Tax law.” Rory laughed before she could stop herself. Eva’s mouth twitched. “Yes.” “Tax law?” “It’s lucrative.” “You once said accountants were where imagination went to die.” “I was twenty. I also thought I could live on red peppers and cigarettes.” “You nearly did.” “I nearly did a lot of things.” The softness in Eva’s voice turned Rory’s anger aside. She studied her friend’s face again and saw, beneath the careful makeup and expensive restraint, how tired she looked. Not the fatigue of a late train or a bad week, but something settled deep behind the eyes. “Why are you here?” Rory asked. “In the bar?” “In London.” “A conference.” “At midnight?” “It ended hours ago. I was walking.” “In Soho? In this weather?” Eva’s gaze moved to the window. Rain ran down the glass in silver threads, bending the green neon into liquid ribbons. “I used to imagine finding you,” she said. “Not intentionally. I just thought London was full of accidents. I’d turn a corner, and there you’d be.” Rory looked down. “For a while I came every Christmas,” Eva went on. “I’d walk through Chinatown and look at every woman with black hair. Once I followed someone for three streets. She thought I was trying to steal her purse.” Despite herself, Rory smiled. “Were you?” “She had excellent boots.” The smile stayed between them for a moment, fragile as breath on cold glass. Then Eva said, “I went to see your mother last spring.” The smile vanished. “Why?” “She rang me. Your father had a stroke.” Rory’s stomach dropped. “When?” “March.” “No one told me.” “She said she tried. Your number had changed.” Rory heard the blood in her ears. “Is he—” “He’s alive. Weaker on one side. Angry about the salt restrictions.” Eva’s mouth curved faintly. “Still quoting Latin at nurses.” Rory stared at her tea, now lukewarm. Her father’s face came to her with painful clarity: Brendan Carter in his study, grey hair combed severely back, telling her that compromise was only failure with better manners. He had wanted chambers, courtrooms, a daughter with his name painted beneath his own. She had wanted—what? At eighteen she had known only that she could not bear becoming the evidence in someone else’s argument. “Your mother misses you,” Eva said. “She knows where I am.” “Does she?” Rory looked up. “What did you tell her?” “That I didn’t know.” “But you found me.” “Tonight? By accident.” “No.” Rory’s voice had gone low. “You knew I was in London. You knew Silas.” Eva did not answer. That was answer enough. “How long?” Rory asked. Eva’s gaze slid toward Silas. He had abandoned his newspaper and was examining a row of bottles with stern attention. “Eva,” Rory said. “Four years.” Rory felt oddly cold. “Four years?” “Silas asked me not to contact you.” Rory turned toward the bar. “Did he?” Silas continued polishing a glass. “Don’t look at him,” Eva said. “It was my choice.” “My God.” “He told me you were safe. He said you were working, that you had a room, that you were—” Eva searched for the word. “Mending.” “Mending?” “That was his word.” Rory’s tea had gone bitter on her tongue. She thought of all the evenings Silas had leaned against this bar, asking whether she had eaten, listening while she described difficult customers and broken bicycle chains and pigeons nesting in the extractor fan. All that time he had known Eva was alive and asking after her. He had folded the knowledge away as neatly as one of his maps. Eva leaned closer. “I wanted to come.” “But you didn’t.” “No.” “Why?” Eva’s hand tightened around the stem of her glass. “Because you left me too.” Rory stared at her. “You think Evan was the only person you escaped?” Eva’s voice had begun to shake. “You cut Cardiff out of yourself. Your father, your mother, the university, the house, the street. Me.” “That isn’t fair.” “No? I sat outside your flat the night he broke your phone. I cleaned the blood off your lip in my bathroom. I lied to your mother when she called because you begged me to. I drove you to the station with your clothes in bin bags, and I watched you get on the train like you were going away for a weekend.” Eva’s eyes were bright now, but no tears fell. “Then you vanished.” “I sent you an address.” “A post office box.” “I was afraid.” “Of Evan finding you?” “Of anyone finding me.” Eva flinched as if struck. Rory heard herself and wished she could pull the words back. “I didn’t mean—” “Yes, you did.” Eva set down her glass. “You meant that if I knew where you were, some part of him could reach you through me.” “That isn’t what I meant.” “Isn’t it? You looked at me and saw everything you were running from. I understood eventually.” “When?” “When your grandmother died.” Eva’s voice flattened. “I heard you came to Cardiff. I waited at the church. I stood outside for an hour like an idiot, watching the doors. Then I saw you get into a car with your aunt. You looked straight through me.” Rory remembered the rain that day, black umbrellas opening like crows’ wings. She remembered feeling hollowed out, moving through the funeral as if underwater. She did not remember seeing Eva. “I didn’t see you,” she said. “I know.” Eva picked up her wine, then put it down again. “That was worse, somehow.” The rain had softened. Somewhere beyond the bar a bus sighed at the kerb. Silas moved to the shelves and began rearranging bottles that did not need rearranging. Rory pressed her thumb into the scar on her wrist. “I thought about calling you.” “When?” “All the time. The first year, especially. I’d see something ridiculous and think, Eva would laugh at that. Or I’d make too much rice because I was still cooking for two people.” She swallowed. “Then time passed. It became harder. I thought you’d be angry.” “I was angry.” “I thought you’d want an explanation I couldn’t give.” Eva looked at her for a long moment. “I didn’t want an explanation.” “What did you want?” “Evidence,” Eva said quietly. “That I mattered after you were safe.” The words entered Rory somewhere beneath language. She remembered Eva at fifteen, standing on a desk in their empty classroom, reciting Lady Macbeth with such ferocity that the English teacher had applauded from the doorway. She remembered Eva at twenty-one in a Cardiff nightclub, mascara smudged, shouting over the music that they were going to be magnificent. Most of all she remembered Eva at the station, both hands wrapped around Rory’s, saying, Don’t call him, don’t answer if he finds your number, don’t you dare come back until you can breathe without checking the door. “You mattered,” Rory said. Eva gave a small, bitter smile. “You have a strange way of showing it.” “I know.” “Do you?” “Yes.” Rory’s throat tightened. “You saved my life.” Eva shut her eyes. The admission had cost more than Rory expected. For years she had treated that night like a door she had opened herself. She had needed to believe in her own escape, to make it singular and clean. Letting Eva stand beside her in the memory threatened the fragile architecture of who she had become. When Eva opened her eyes again, the shine there had become tears. “You weren’t supposed to disappear because of it.” Rory reached across the space between them. Her fingers hovered over Eva’s hand. Eva looked down at the offered touch but did not move. “I didn’t know how to come back,” Rory said. “You could have started with hello.” “Hello,” Rory whispered. Eva’s face crumpled. She covered her mouth, but the laugh that escaped was wet and broken. Rory slid from her stool and put her arms around her. For a second Eva remained rigid, held together by tailoring and habit. Then her forehead dropped against Rory’s shoulder. Her hand gripped the back of Rory’s damp jacket hard enough to hurt. They stayed that way while the clock ticked and the rain thinned and Silas, without a word, switched off the green neon outside. The bar dimmed. The old maps vanished into shadow, their borders and battle lines retreating from sight. When Eva finally pulled back, her makeup had smudged beneath her eyes. She looked younger. She looked exhausted. She looked, Rory thought, like herself. “I have a room at the Langham,” Eva said. “There’s a minibar the size of a wardrobe.” Rory wiped her own cheek with the heel of her hand. “I have instant noodles.” Eva laughed again. “God, I missed you.” “I missed you too.” The confession came easily now, though it arrived too late to be anything but what it was: an apology, an accusation, a beginning. Eva reached for her wine and stopped. “Are you happy?” Rory glanced toward Silas. He stood at the far end of the bar, haloed by lamplight, his ring glinting as he folded a towel. He met her eyes briefly. There was no defence in his face. Only the weary patience of a man who knew that secrets, however carefully kept, always found their way home. “Sometimes,” Rory said. Eva nodded. “Me too.” It was not enough. It was not forgiveness, not yet. Time did not return what it had taken merely because two people named the loss aloud. But Eva stayed for another hour, and then another. They drank tea gone cold and wine left unfinished. They spoke of Cardiff until the city no longer felt like a locked room, and when Eva finally rose to leave, she did not promise to call. She wrote her number on the back of a receipt instead. Rory watched her walk beneath the darkened sign, umbrella open against the last of the rain. At the corner, Eva turned. The streetlight silvered one side of her face. “Hello,” she called. Rory stood in the doorway, her scarred wrist warm where Eva had held it. “Hello,” she answered, and the word carried farther than she expected into the waiting night.
created_at"2026-07-25T18:10:16.337Z" 7/25/2026, 6:10:16 PM
model"moonshotai/kimi-k3-20260715"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency3091
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time176592
tokens_prompt846
tokens_completion5704
native_tokens_prompt906
native_tokens_completion4948
native_tokens_completion_images(null)
native_tokens_reasoning588
native_tokens_cached768
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
num_fetches(null)
web_search_engine(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"stop"
service_tier(null)
usage0.0748644
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"650c9b12-7b6d-444d-8d92-df8daef84d7a"
id"chatcmpl-6a64fc0981eb13cded511543"
is_byokfalse
latency3091
model_permaslug"moonshotai/kimi-k3-20260715"
provider_name"Moonshot AI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.18.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
request_id"req-1785003016-jFAARHeoT4q7emuagjtS"
session_id(null)
preset_id(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1785003016-6qfrlFtQW4MNmOYY8fAU"
upstream_id"chatcmpl-6a64fc0981eb13cded511543"
total_cost0.0748644
cache_discount0.0020736
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"Moonshot AI"
response_cache_source_id(null)
data_region"global"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags47
adverbTagCount4
adverbTags
0"Eva’s answer came too [too]"
1"She glanced around [around]"
2"Eva’s mouth curved faintly [faintly]"
3"Eva said quietly [quietly]"
dialogueSentences190
tagDensity0.247
leniency0.495
rawRatio0.085
effectiveRatio0.042
85.89% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3190
totalAiIsmAdverbs9
found
0
adverb"softly"
count1
1
adverb"quickly"
count2
2
adverb"completely"
count1
3
adverb"very"
count2
4
adverb"slowly"
count1
5
adverb"tightly"
count1
6
adverb"carefully"
count1
highlights
0"softly"
1"quickly"
2"completely"
3"very"
4"slowly"
5"tightly"
6"carefully"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (16 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
0"Blackwood"
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
87.46% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3190
totalAiIsms8
found
0
word"flicker"
count1
1
word"chill"
count1
2
word"traced"
count1
3
word"racing"
count1
4
word"standard"
count1
5
word"silence"
count1
6
word"stomach"
count1
7
word"glinting"
count1
highlights
0"flicker"
1"chill"
2"traced"
3"racing"
4"standard"
5"silence"
6"stomach"
7"glinting"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches1
maxInWindow1
found
0
label"stomach dropped/sank"
count1
highlights
0"stomach dropped"
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences220
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences220
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences364
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
repeatedSegmentCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen72
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3187
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions46
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
0.00% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions173
wordCount2088
uniqueNames24
maxNameDensity3.3
worstName"Eva"
maxWindowNameDensity6.5
worstWindowName"Eva"
discoveredNames
Raven2
Nest2
Rory62
West1
End1
Berlin1
Wall1
Lisbon1
Vienna1
Silas14
Eva69
Cardiff3
Golden1
Empress1
Evan2
Aurora1
Despite1
Brendan1
Carter1
Lady1
Macbeth1
English1
Don1
Rain3
persons
0"Raven"
1"Nest"
2"Rory"
3"Wall"
4"Silas"
5"Eva"
6"Evan"
7"Brendan"
8"Carter"
9"Rain"
places
0"West"
1"End"
2"Berlin"
3"Lisbon"
4"Vienna"
5"Cardiff"
globalScore0
windowScore0
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences135
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"looked like an instrument"
1"felt like a locked room, and when Eva f"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.314
wordCount3187
matches
0"Not the fatigue of a late train or a bad week, but something settled deep behind the eyes"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount3
totalSentences364
matches
0"treated that night"
1"stayed that way"
2"knew that secrets"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs220
mean14.49
std18.65
cv1.288
sampleLengths
0112
123
210
35
423
58
610
7101
815
973
1014
113
127
136
1411
1582
163
171
187
1940
204
2121
2214
2322
2421
2540
267
272
2831
299
3010
3119
327
333
3410
3510
362
372
382
397
4029
4113
425
4310
446
455
463
474
4811
4937
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount1
totalSentences220
matches
0"been straightened"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount4
totalVerbs380
matches
0"was polishing"
1"was reaching"
2"was holding"
3"was examining"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount3
semicolonCount1
flaggedSentences3
totalSentences364
ratio0.008
matches
0"A man in a dark coat nursed a pint beneath a framed photograph of Berlin before the Wall came down; two women whispered over gin near the door."
1"It was so unlike the Eva Rory remembered—cigarette smoke, vanilla lip balm, the chemical sweetness of hair dye—that she had to look away."
2"She had wanted—what?"
100.00% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1548
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount56
adverbRatio0.03617571059431524
lyAdverbCount20
lyAdverbRatio0.012919896640826873
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences364
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences364
mean8.76
std8
cv0.913
sampleLengths
031
134
227
320
47
516
610
75
89
911
103
117
121
137
143
1515
165
1728
1810
1921
207
2115
2215
2311
2418
2520
2624
2714
283
297
306
316
325
3324
346
3518
3634
373
381
397
404
4111
4222
433
444
456
4612
473
488
496
43.96% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats22
diversityRatio0.23076923076923078
totalSentences364
uniqueOpeners84
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount7
totalSentences195
matches
0"Then Eva said,"
1"Then the expression vanished beneath"
2"Then Eva said,"
3"All that time he had"
4"Somewhere beyond the bar a"
5"Then her forehead dropped against"
6"Only the weary patience of"
ratio0.036
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount49
totalSentences195
matches
0"She carried the damp with"
1"He was polishing a glass"
2"He set the glass down"
3"His silver signet ring caught"
4"He limped toward the back"
5"She dropped her courier bag"
6"He had told her only"
7"She was reaching for the"
8"She wore charcoal wool, beautifully"
9"Her hair, once a reckless"
10"She paused beneath the green"
11"Her gaze moved over Rory’s"
12"She faltered, and Rory saw"
13"It was so unlike the"
14"They were worse for that."
15"She had fallen from a"
16"She set down her wine."
17"Her nails were short, pale,"
18"She looked at the wine"
19"She glanced around The Raven’s"
ratio0.251
36.92% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount165
totalSentences195
matches
0"The green neon above The"
1"She carried the damp with"
2"Yu-Fei had sent her across"
3"Rory had returned soaked, under-tipped,"
4"Silas looked up from behind"
5"He was polishing a glass"
6"He set the glass down"
7"His silver signet ring caught"
8"Rory considered lying, then abandoned"
9"He limped toward the back"
10"She dropped her courier bag"
11"The bar was nearly deserted."
12"A man in a dark"
13"Rory had asked Silas about"
14"He had told her only"
15"She was reaching for the"
16"A woman entered with the"
17"She wore charcoal wool, beautifully"
18"Her hair, once a reckless"
19"She paused beneath the green"
ratio0.846
0.00% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount0
totalSentences195
matches(empty)
ratio0
77.92% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences77
technicalSentenceCount7
matches
0"She carried the damp with her: in the ends of her hair, in the cuffs of her jeans, in the chill that had settled beneath her collar after the last delivery of t…"
1"She paused beneath the green glow from the window, searching the room with the careful uncertainty of someone who had arrived expecting another place."
2"Eva crossed the room quickly, heels striking the old floorboards, and stopped two feet away as if some invisible boundary had risen between them."
3"The girl who had once dyed a streak of her hair blue with ink stolen from a Cardiff stationer’s had vanished so completely that Rory felt a brief, irrational ur…"
4"Silas moved down the bar with the quiet discretion of a man who understood when to become furniture."
5"She remembered feeling hollowed out, moving through the funeral as if underwater."
6"Silas moved to the shelves and began rearranging bottles that did not need rearranging."
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags47
uselessAdditionCount1
matches
0"she answered, and the word carried farther than she expected into the waiting night"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags28
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"She faltered (falter)"
1"Rory whispered (whisper)"
dialogueSentences190
tagDensity0.147
leniency0.295
rawRatio0.071
effectiveRatio0.021
87.7385%