Run: 2026-09-10-01M25DPE5ME2Y5JN6CWX5GA5FB

Molly watched the birthday party through binoculars from the back of a dented van. Bill ate a stolen juice box and wiped frosting on his sleeve. In the yard, a clown twisted balloon poodles while five children bounced inside a castle that looked like a liability waiver. The presents sat on a folding table behind the cake, guarded by a bouncer built like a refrigerator. “Okay,” Molly said. “The gifts are behind the cake.” “I see them,” Bill said. “Why three tables?” “Dentist parents. They hate joy.” “Focus. We go in as entertainers.” “I’m not wearing the clown suit.” “You’re wearing the clown suit.” “Last time I made a giraffe that looked like a crime scene.” “That’s why you’re the distraction.” Bill sighed and checked his plastic princess watch. The clown began handing out balloon swords. The children immediately began a small war. Molly unfolded a crayon map on the dashboard. “Plan is simple. I cut the ribbon, pass gifts through the hedge.” “Why the hedge?” “Front gate has a bouncer.” “For a kid’s party?” “He does CrossFit.” “Backup exit?” “Bouncy castle.” “No.” “We deflate it and ride it down the hill.” “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.” “Thank you.” A child screamed with joy or terror. Bill couldn’t tell. The parents applauded anyway. Molly tapped the map. “What about parents?” “Sleepy juice. Twenty minutes, nap time.” “Chloroform?” “Juice boxes. Apple flavor.” “Monstrous. Nobody likes apple.” “Fine. Fruit punch.” “Better.” Bill adjusted his clown wig. It smelled like regret and cotton candy. The piñata swayed in the breeze. Molly drew a dotted line from the gift table to the hedge and then to the bouncy castle. “Three blind spots. Behind piñata, inside cake, under gift table.” “Inside cake?” “Five tiers. Room for presents.” “You want to hide gifts in a cake?” “Blending in.” “Getting frosting on everything.” “We’ll lick it off.” “Gross.” “Delicious.” The clown made a balloon sword. A boy used it to attack another boy. Parents cheered. Molly started the van. Bill put on the wig and looked like a witness protection clown. “On my signal, trip over the piñata.” “What signal?” “Me screaming the clown is on fire.” “Will I be on fire?” “Only emotionally.” “Then I grab gifts, we meet at hedge.” “What about cake?” “We take it too.” “Why?” “Somebody’s birthday, Bill.” “That’s the spirit.” Molly put the van in gear. The party continued, unaware that two terrible thieves were about to ruin a perfectly good afternoon and probably get stuck in a bouncy castle. “And if the bouncer catches us?” “We tell him we’re the gift inspectors.” “Does that work?” “It works on uncles.” “What about the clown?” “Clowns love chaos.” “You’re a terrible person.” “I’m a professional.” “We’re doomed.” “Probably rich, though.” “The clown suspects nothing.” “Probably.” “Yet.” Bill cracked his knuckles, which was difficult with a juice box in one hand and a stolen party horn in the other. Molly ducked. The clown shrugged and returned to making a balloon poodle.