Run: 2026-09-23-01M37NYCS5ZXX9W5J0MS0QPAWF

The van smelled like cold pizza and bad decisions. Molly spread a hand-drawn map of the party venue across the dashboard, while Bill examined a bright pink bunny costume with the enthusiasm of a man holding a dead raccoon. "Absolutely not," Molly said, snatching the costume from him. "We agreed. No costumes this time." "That was the plan? That was the whole plan?" Bill tapped the map. "We walk in, wave at some parents, and stroll out with a mountain of presents. That's not a heist, that's a miracle." "It's a soft target. It's a five-year-old's birthday party, Bill. The security is a bouncy castle and a dad in a 'Grill Master' apron." Bill slumped into the passenger seat and pulled out a notebook. "Fine. Then walk me through it, genius. What's our way in?" "Catering. I signed us up as the entertainment. We're the balloon animal people." "We don't know how to make balloon animals." "I watched one video." "One video." "It was a very thorough video. I can make a snake. Possibly a worm, which is basically a snake with lower self-esteem." Bill pinched the bridge of his nose. "And the presents? How do we get them out? There's gotta be thirty kids in there." "Gift table, northeast corner, by the cake. We load them into the balloon cart under a tarp. Everyone's watching the clown." "There's a clown?" "There's always a clown, Bill. Clowns are nature's distraction. We should know. We were clowns for the Henderson job." "You were a clown. I was the sad little tricycle guy, and I threw my back out." "Which is why this time you're on cart duty." Molly jabbed a finger at the map. "I twist balloons, you wheel the cart, we're out the side gate by the piñata. Simple." Bill was quiet for a moment, staring at the notebook. "Okay, one thing's bothering me. The kids." "What about them?" "They're going to see their presents leave. Little Madison's going to open nothing but wrapping paper and disappointment. You remember what Christmas was like at our house?" Molly sighed. "Oh, here we go." "I'm serious. We're the bad guys in this one, Mol. We're literally the villains of a five-year-old's birthday." "We're professional thieves, Bill. We've stolen a Monet. We've stolen a mayor's yacht. We once stole a bridge." "I'm just saying, maybe we swap the presents with decoys. Same boxes, filled with rocks. Kids like rocks." "Kids do not like rocks." "Geode kids do." Molly stared at him, then at the map, then at the bunny costume still crumpled on the seat. A slow, terrible smile spread across her face. "Bill. That's it. We don't steal the presents." "We don't?" "We steal the party. The whole thing. Cake, clown, presents, bouncy castle. Everything. Clean sweep. Nobody's crying over one present if there's no party left to cry about." Bill looked at her for a long moment. "That's the most evil thing I've ever heard." "Thank you." "It's also completely insane." "Also thank you. Now put on the bunny costume. We're going in as the entertainment's assistants." "There's an entertainment AND assistants?" "There is now. Welcome to the big leagues, Bill."