Run: 2026-09-23-01M37PBZX17YCR1WH2HGYBNR3N

Molly spread the blueprint across the kitchen table, weighting the corners with a bag of gummy worms and a novelty mug that read World's Okayest Criminal. "Alright," she said. "The party starts at two. We go in at two fifteen, when the cake comes out. Every parent in that yard will be staring at a five-year-old trying to blow out a candle with the lung capacity of a hamster." "That's our window," Bill said, nodding sagely. "That's our window. Now, the presents are on a folding table by the garage. We grab the big ones first. The big ones are always the good ones. Nobody wraps a sock in a box the size of a dishwasher." "Unless it's a trampoline," Bill said. "It's never a trampoline, Bill." "It could be a trampoline." "It's a sock. It's always a sock, and the box is full of packing peanuts, and somewhere a parent is laughing at us." Bill chewed his thumb. "What about the clown?" "What about the clown?" "There's a clown. I saw the flyer at the community center. 'Bubbles the Clown, two to four.'" "Fine. We handle the clown." "How do you handle a clown?" "Same way you handle anyone. You don't make eye contact and you walk with purpose." Bill shook his head. "Clowns can smell fear, Molly. Everyone knows that." "Then don't be afraid. Be a birthday clown yourself. That's the disguise, you idiot. We go in as entertainers. You're a clown, I'm a balloon artist." "I don't know how to make balloons." "You make a snake. Every balloon animal you're asked for, you say, 'Funny story, it's a snake.' Kids love snakes. Kids don't know what a swan is anyway." "Okay, okay." Bill leaned over the blueprint. "What's this rectangle here?" "The bouncy castle." "We're stealing a bouncy castle?" "We are not stealing a bouncy castle. You said that last time and we spent four hours in a moonwalk with no exit strategy." "It was a good castle," Bill said quietly. "It was evidence, Bill. It had a police sergeant's daughter in it." Molly tapped the table. "Focus. We're in and out in eleven minutes. You take the left side of the present table, I take the right. We meet at the hedge." "What about the piñata?" "What about it?" "Is there treasure in the piñata?" "There's candy in the piñata." "Candy is treasure." "Candy is a felony multiplier, Bill. We're not adding candy to a grand theft presents charge." Bill sighed and looked at the ceiling. "I just think, if we're doing the job anyway, the piñata's right there." "The piñata is a distraction. The piñata is a room full of children holding bats. You know what happens when a piñata breaks? Chaos. Screaming. Blindfolded children swinging at anything that moves, including a middle-aged clown with a pillow case full of wrapped toys." "So we skip the piñata." "We skip the piñata." "What if the piñata has an alarm?" "Why would a piñata have an alarm?" "What if it's not a real piñata? What if it's a decoy piñata, and the real presents are inside it?" Molly stared at him for a long moment. "You know what? Fine. Fine. We take the piñata. We take the whole piñata, and if there's a sock in it, that's on you." Bill grinned and pulled on his rainbow wig. "Two fifteen," she said. "Cake time." "Snake time," he corrected, and honked his nose.