NC Bench
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Run: 2026-10-27-01M5YH8QHYEQG8S2531VWCVQNS
Run Details
Model:
Kimi K3.1 Pro (Reasoning, Max)
Test:
Bad Writing Habits
Scenario:
Thriller: chase through city streets
Duration:
12m 20s
Cost:
$0.205256
Provider:
Moonshot AI
Evaluation summary
Score
Evaluator
Details Link
100.00%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism adverb frequency
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism character names
(details)
100.00%
AI-ism location names
(details)
92.34%
AI-ism word frequency
(details)
100.00%
Cliché density
(details)
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
(details)
100.00%
Filter word density
(details)
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
(details)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
(details)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
(details)
66.67%
Name drop frequency
(details)
100.00%
Narrator intent-glossing
(details)
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
(details)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
(details)
100.00%
Paragraph length variance
(details)
100.00%
Passive voice overuse
(details)
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
(details)
100.00%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
(details)
94.00%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
(details)
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
(details)
100.00%
Sentence length variance
(details)
58.79%
Sentence opener variety
(details)
36.04%
Adverb-first sentence starts
(details)
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
(details)
32.97%
Subject-first sentence starts
(details)
81.08%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
(details)
100.00%
Technical jargon density
(details)
100.00%
Useless dialogue additions
(details)
100.00%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
(details)
92.0631%
Overall
Model input
System
You are an expert and award-winning novel writer in the dark Thriller genre. Your readers are hooked on your stories and can't wait to read the book you have in store. <important> - MUST: Start each chapter in medias res (in the middle of action). AVOID talking about the weather, time of day, the position of the sun, or other boring stuff. - The instructions/summary are just a that, a summary. Feel free to add details, stretch sections and add interesting transitions/descriptions/fillers. - When called for it, have fast-paced action, but otherwise take things slow. This is an experience, and not for people with short attention spans. Enjoy the wine, not slurp Red Bull. - Add descriptions when transitioning places/times/etc, or when coming by new places (e.g. a corner shop, a cafe, etc.). But remember: NOT at the start or end of a chapter. - MUST: AVOID ending in internal monologue, reminiscing or waiting for the next day. A good chapter end is when we're ending right when shit hits the fan. We want to have the reader be excited for what comes next. So no reminiscing, contemplating or summarizing the day. It's popcorn time! </important>
User/Human
Take into account the following glossary of characters/locations/items/lore... when writing your response: <codex> <character id="4416" name="Detective Harlow Quinn" aliases="Quinn, Detective Quinn, Harlow" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Antagonist"> <eyeColor>brown</eyeColor> <hair>closely cropped salt-and-pepper</hair> <height>5'9"</height> <age>41</age> <jawline>sharp jaw</jawline> <watch>worn leather watch on her left wrist</watch> <bearing>military precision</bearing> <description>A Metropolitan Police detective with 18 years of decorated service who suspects the clique is involved in criminal activity.</description> <backstory>She lost her partner, DS Morris, during a case three years ago under unexplained circumstances that had supernatural origins she doesn't yet understand.</backstory> </character> <character id="4417" name="Tomás Herrera" aliases="Tommy, Tomás, Herrera" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Support"> <eyeColor>warm brown</eyeColor> <hair>short curly dark brown</hair> <height>5'10"</height> <age>29</age> <skinTone>olive skin</skinTone> <scar>scar running along his left forearm from a knife attack</scar> <medallion>Saint Christopher medallion around his neck</medallion> <birthplace>Seville, Spain</birthplace> <description>A former paramedic who provides off-the-books medical care for the clique.</description> <backstory>Born in Seville, Spain. He moved to London to work for the NHS but lost his license after administering unauthorized treatments to supernatural patients.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> <location id="856" name="The Veil Market" aliases="Veil Market, the Market, underground market" realm="Earth"> <currentLocation>abandoned Tube station beneath Camden</currentLocation> <entryRequirement>bone token</entryRequirement> <schedule>moves locations every full moon</schedule> <description>A hidden supernatural black market that sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical substances, and information.</description> </location> </codex> <proseGuidelines> <styleGuide> - Write in past tense and use British English spelling and grammar - Keep a Flesch reading ease score of 60 - Respect the the Royal Order of Adjectives: The order is: opinion, size, age, shape, color, origin, material, purpose, followed by the noun itself (e.g., "a lovely little old rectangular green French silver whittling knife") - Respect the ablaut reduplication rule (e.g. tick-tock, flip-flop) - Write in active voice - Passive voice: <bad>The book was read by Sarah.</bad> - Active voice: <good>Sarah read the book.</good> - Reduce the use of passive verbs - <bad>For a moment, I was tempted to throw in the towel.</bad> - <good>For a moment, I felt tempted to throw in the towel.</good> - Avoid misplaced modifiers that can cause confusion when starting with "-ing" words: - <bad>Considering going to the store, the empty fridge reflected in Betty's eyes.</bad> - <good>Betty stared into the empty fridge. It was time to go to the store.</good> - Avoid redundant adverbs that state the obvious meaning already contained in the verb: - <bad>She whispered quietly to her mom.</bad> - <good>She whispered to her mom.</good> - Use stronger, more descriptive verbs over weak ones: - <bad>Daniel drove quickly to his mother's house.</bad> - <good>Daniel raced to his mother's house.</good> - Omit adverbs that don't add solid meaning like "extremely", "definitely", "truly", "very", "really": - <bad>The movie was extremely boring.</bad> - <good>The movie was dull.</good> - Use adverbs to replace clunky phrasing when they increase clarity: - <bad>He threw the bags into the corner in a rough manner.</bad> - <good>He threw the bags into the corner roughly.</good> - Avoid making simple thoughts needlessly complex: - <bad>After I woke up in the morning the other day, I went downstairs, turned on the stove, and made myself a very good omelet.</bad> - <good>I cooked a delicious omelet for breakfast yesterday morning.</good> - Never backload sentences by putting the main idea at the end: - <bad>I decided not to wear too many layers because it's really hot outside.</bad> - <good>It's sweltering outside today, so I dressed light.</good> - Omit nonessential details that don't contribute to the core meaning: - <bad>It doesn't matter what kind of coffee I buy, where it's from, or if it's organic or not—I need to have cream because I really don't like how the bitterness makes me feel.</bad> - <good>I add cream to my coffee because the bitter taste makes me feel unwell.</good> - Always follow the "show, don't tell" principle. For instance: - Telling: <bad>Michael was terribly afraid of the dark.</bad> - Showing: <good>Michael tensed as his mother switched off the light and left the room.</good>- Telling: <bad>I walked through the forest. It was already Fall, and I was getting cold.</bad> - Showing: <good>Dry orange leaves crunched under my feet. I pulled my coat's collar up and rubbed my hands together.</good>- Add sensory details (sight, smell, taste, sound, touch) to support the "showing" (but keep an active voice) - <bad>The room was filled with the scent of copper.</bad> - <good>Copper stung my nostrils. Blood. Recent.</good> - Use descriptive language more sporadically. While vivid descriptions are engaging, human writers often use them in bursts rather than consistently throughout a piece. When adding them, make them count! Like when we transition from one location to the next, or someone is reminiscing their past, or explaining a concept/their dream... - Avoid adverbs and clichés and overused/commonly used phrases. Aim for fresh and original descriptions. - Avoid writing all sentences in the typical subject, verb, object structure. Mix short, punchy sentences with long, descriptive ones. Drop fill words to add variety. Like so: <good>Locked. Seems like someone doesn't want his secrets exposed. I can work with that.</good> - Convey events and story through dialogue. It is important to keep a unique voice for every character and make it consistent. - Write dialogue that reveals characters' personalities, motivations, emotions, and attitudes in an interesting and compelling manner - Leave dialogue unattributed. If needed, only use "he/she said" dialogue tags and convey people's actions or face expressions through their speech. Dialogue always is standalone, never part of a paragraph. Like so: - <bad>"I don't know," Helena said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders</bad> - <good>"No idea" "Why not? It was your responsibility"</good> - Avoid boring and mushy dialog and descriptions, have dialogue always continue the action, never stall or include unnecessary fluff. Vary the descriptions to not repeat yourself. Avoid conversations that are just "Let's go" "yes, let's" or "Are you ready?" "Yes I'm ready". Those are not interesting. Think hard about every situtation and word of text before writing dialogue. If it doesn't serve a purpose and it's just people talking about their day, leave it. No one wants to have a normal dinner scene, something needs to happen for it to be in the story. Words are expensive to print, so make sure they count! - Put dialogue on its own paragraph to separate scene and action. - Use body language to reveal hidden feelings and implied accusations- Imply feelings and thoughts, never state them directly - NEVER use indicators of uncertainty like "trying" or "maybe" - NEVER use em-dashes, use commas for asides instead </styleGuide> <voiceGuide> Each character in the story needs to have distinct speech patterns: - Word choice preferences - Sentence length tendencies - Cultural/educational influences - Verbal tics and catchphrases Learn how each person talks and continue in their style, and use their Codex entries as reference. <examples> - <bad>"We need to go now." "Yes, we should leave." "I agree."</bad> <good>"Time's up." "Indeed, our departure is rather overdue." "Whatever, let's bounce."</good> - Power Dynamic Example: <bad> "We need to discuss the contract." "Yes, let's talk about it." "I have concerns." </bad> <good> "A word about the contract." "Of course, Mr. Blackwood. Whatever you need." "The terms seem..." A manicured nail tapped the desk. "Inadequate." "I can explain every-" "Can you?" </good> </examples> </voiceGuide> <dialogueFlow> When writing dialogue, consider that it usually has a goal in mind, which gives it a certain flow. Make dialogue sections also quite snappy in the back and forth, and don't spread the lines out as much. It's good to have details before, after, or as a chunk in-between, but we don't want to have a trail of "dialogue breadcrumbs" spread throughout a conversation. <examples> - Pattern 1 - Question/Deflection/Revelation: <good> "Where were you last night?" "Work. The usual." "Lipstick's an interesting shade for spreadsheets." </good> - Pattern 2 - Statement/Contradiction/Escalation: <good> "Your brother's clean." "Tommy doesn't touch drugs." "I'm holding his tox screen." </good> - Pattern 3 - Observation/Denial/Truth: <good> "That's a new watch." "Birthday gift." "We both know what birthdays mean in this business." </good> - Example - A Simple Coffee Order: <bad> "I'll have a coffee." "What size?" "Large, please." </bad> <good> "Black coffee.""Size?""Large. Been a long night." "That bodega shooting?" "You watch too much news." "My brother owns that store." </good> This short exchange: - Advances plot (reveals connection to crime) - Shows character (cop working late) - Creates tension (unexpected connection) - Sets up future conflict (personal stake) - Example - Dinner Scene: <bad> "Pass the salt." "Here you go." "Thanks." </bad> <good> "Salt?" "Perfect as is. Mother's recipe." "Mother always did prefer... bland things." "Unlike your first wife?" </good> - Example - Office Small Talk: <bad> "Nice weather today." "Yes, very nice." "Good for golf." </bad> <good> "Perfect golf weather." "Shame about your membership." "Temporary suspension. Board meets next week." "I know. I called the vote." </good> </examples> </dialogueFlow> <subtextGuide> - Layer dialogue with hidden meaning: <bad>"I hate you!" she yelled angrily.</bad> <good>"I made your favorite dinner." The burnt pot sat accusingly on the stove.</good> - Create tension through indirect communication: <bad>"Are you cheating on me?"</bad> <good>"Late meeting again?" The lipstick stain on his collar caught the light.</good> <examples> - Example 1 - Unspoken Betrayal: <bad> "Did you tell them about our plans?" "No, I would never betray you." "I don't believe you." </bad> <good> "Funny. Johnson mentioned our expansion plans today." "The market's full of rumors." "Mentioned the exact numbers, actually." The pen in his hand snapped. </good> - Example 2 - Failed Marriage: <bad> "You're never home anymore." "I have to work late." "I miss you." </bad> <good> "Your dinner's in the microwave. Again." "Meetings ran long." "They always do." She folded the same shirt for the third time. </good> - Example 3 - Power Struggle: <bad> "You can't fire me." "I'm the boss." "I'll fight this." </bad> <good> "That's my father's nameplate you're sitting behind." "Was." "The board meeting's on Thursday." </good> </examples> </subtextGuide> <sceneDetail> While writing dialogue makes things more fun, sometimes we need to add detail to not have it be a full on theatre piece. <examples> - Example A (Power Dynamic Scene) <good> "Where's my money?" The ledger snapped shut. "I need more time." "Interesting." He pulled out a familiar gold pocket watch. My mother's. "Time is exactly what you bargained with last month." "That was different-" "Was it?" The watch dangled between us. "Four generations of O'Reillys have wound this every night. Your mother. Your grandmother. Your great-grandmother.Shall we see who winds it next?" </good> - Example B (Action Chase) It's much better to be in the head of the character experiencing it, showing a bit of their though-process, mannerisms and personality: <good> Three rules for surviving a goblin chase in Covent Garden: Don't run straight. Don't look back. Don't let them herd you underground. I broke the first rule at Drury Lane. Rookie mistake. The fruit cart I dodged sailed into the wall behind me. Glass shattered. Someone screamed about insurance. *Tourist season's getting rough*, the scream seemed to say. Londoners adapt fast. "Oi! Market's closed!" The goblin's accent was pure East End. They're evolving. Learning. I spotted the Warren Street tube station sign ahead. *Shit.* There went rule three. </good> - Example C (Crime Scene Investigation) <good> "Greek." Davies snapped photos of the symbols. "No, wait. Reverse Greek." "Someone's been watching too many horror films." I picked up a receipt from the floor. Occult supply shop in Camden. Paid by credit card. *Amateur hour*. "Could be dangerous though," Davies said. "Remember Bristol?" "Bristol was Sanskrit. And actual cultists." I pointed to the nearest symbol. "This genius wrote 'darkness' backwards but used a Sigma instead of an S. It's summoning Instagram followers at best." "Speaking of followers..." Davies pointed to heavy foot traffic in the dust. Multiple sets. All new trainers. *Ah.* "Anyone check local uni paranormal societies?" </good> - Example D (Dialogue-heavy) <good> "Found your card in her wallet." The detective slid it across the table. Worn edges. Folded corner. Three years old at least. "Standard practice. I work missing persons." "Funny thing about missing persons.Eventually they stop being missing. Turn up in the Thames. Under motorways. In pieces." "I don't-" "You found four last year. All breathing." She opened a file. "This would've been your first dead one. If we hadn't found her first." The card felt heavier somehow. </good> </examples> </sceneDetail> <sceneOpenings> KEY RULE: Never open with more than one paragraph of description, no matter how beautiful. Description should be earned through action and dialogue. Instead of opening with setting description, open with: - A character doing something specific - A line of dialogue that raises questions - An unexpected observation - A moment of tension or conflict - Start with a hook that's 1-2 sentences maximum - Follow with a smaller paragraph that provides immediate context - Vary paragraph size from the start to create visual interest </sceneOpenings> </proseGuidelines> Write a chapter based on the following instructions: <instructions> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the thriller genre. A detective is pursuing a suspect through rain-soaked city streets at night. The chase takes them from the street level down into an underground market. The detective must decide whether to follow the suspect into unfamiliar and potentially dangerous territory. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary. </instructions>
Model response
Messages
Meta
AI
Rook’s shoulder slammed into Quinn’s
chest and drove her against a shop shutter.
The handcuffs flew from her
hand.
She caught the cord at
his throat and yanked until it snapped. He twisted free.
By the time she had
her balance, he
was sprinting
along Camden High Street.
Quinn shoved the broken cord
into her pocket and ran.
Rain glazed the road beneath
the streetlamps.
Night buses hissed through standing
water, and late drinkers crowded the shop awnings. Rook drove straight through them. He knocked a man sideways, sent a phone spinning into the gutter and ducked between two taxis. Quinn followed. “Police. Move.”
A delivery cyclist wobbled across
her path.
She caught his handlebar, turned
him aside and kept going.
Her ribs pulsed where Rook
had hit her.
Water ran from her cropped
salt-and-pepper hair and stung her eyes.
The tail from the Raven’s
Nest had gone wrong when Rook dumped his car in Camden. Until then, she had watched him drink beneath Silas’s green neon sign, calm as a man with nowhere to be.
Now his grey coat flickered
between pedestrians, always one turn ahead.
She lifted her radio without
breaking stride. “Control, Quinn. Foot pursuit, south on Camden High Street. Male, grey coat, six foot. Suspect is Rook. I need units towards the station approach.” Static chewed through the reply. “Detective, repeat your location.” “Camden High Street. He’s cutting left.” Rook glanced back. Not to find her. To check the distance.
Quinn had seen enough men
run from police. Most wasted themselves in the first hundred yards.
They looked behind them, collided
with furniture and chose alleys because alleys
felt like hiding places
.
Rook ran with an economy
she recognised. He had planned this route.
He swept a stack of
plastic crates into her path.
She planted one foot on
a low bollard and cleared the worst of them. Her other boot landed badly. Pain flared through her knee.
She stumbled, caught a shop
frame and drove on. Rook turned into a narrow service alley. The street noise thinned behind her. Wet cardboard and fryer oil fouled the air. Steam leaked from a kitchen vent, briefly bleaching him white.
He shoved a wheelie bin
at her hip.
She struck it with her
forearm and let it roll past.
He was waiting on the
other side. The knife came from inside his sleeve. Quinn turned her wrist and let the blade take her coat instead of her throat. It scored her left forearm.
She drove her knee into
his thigh and slammed his knife hand against the wall. Rook laughed through his teeth. “Morris stopped at the door.” Quinn’s grip tightened. “You’ve got five seconds to explain that.” “He needed four.” He headbutted her. White light burst across her vision.
Her hold loosened for an
instant. Rook tore free, leaving a strip of grey lining in her fist, and vaulted a low gate. Quinn went after him. The gate rattled back into her shin, but she reached the top and dropped into the next passage. Blood ran warm over her wristwatch.
She wiped it against her
coat and saw the cut, shallow but long. Rook could have opened her neck. He had chosen her arm. The passage ended beside a derelict Underground entrance. Boards covered the ticket hall windows. Someone had painted the roundel black and fixed a council
notice
across the doors, though half its text had peeled away. Rook slipped through a narrow service opening and vanished below street level. Quinn followed him down. Rainwater chased her over the steps. With each turn, the sounds of Camden receded. Tyres. Voices. The loose rattle of the shop shutter. By the second landing, she could hear only her boots and the tap of water somewhere deeper in the station. Then came music. Three thin notes rose and fell below her, too slow for a song she knew. Rook stood at the foot of the stairs before a steel door. He held a small white object against a brass plate. Something moved behind the metal. The door opened on darkness threaded with coloured lights. A man climbed the steps from the other side, carrying a scuffed black medical bag. Rook pushed past him without a word and crossed the threshold. Quinn took the last three steps together. The man moved into her path. “Not that way, Detective.” She knew his face from a photograph pinned to her clique board. Tomás Herrera. Former paramedic. The man Silas’s people called when an ambulance would create too many forms. Short dark curls clung to his forehead. A silver medallion rested against his chest, its figure worn smooth by thumbs. “Move, Herrera.” “You’re bleeding.” “You can nurse it in the cells.” His gaze dropped to her arm. When he reached for it, she knocked his hand aside. His sleeve rode up, exposing a pale scar along his left forearm. “Pressure on the cut,” he said. “Your mouth can keep working.” Beyond him, Rook remained visible through the open door. He had stopped running. He stood beneath a green lamp with his hands in his pockets. Quinn pointed through the doorway. “That man is wanted for murder.” “Then let him enjoy his last few minutes of freedom.” “He knows what happened to DS Morris.” Tomás’s fingers closed around the Saint Christopher medallion. The door
began to
close. Quinn stepped forwards, and Tomás shifted with her. He did not grab her. He simply occupied the space she needed. “What is down there?” “The Veil Market. It moved beneath Camden at the full moon.” “A market.” “It sells enchanted goods, banned alchemical stock and information. Some of the information is even true.” “And Rook has protection?” “Rook has a token. You have a warrant card. Only one of those opens the door without offending it.” Quinn lifted her radio. “Control, Quinn. Priority. I’m below the abandoned station off…” The transmission light stayed dark. She changed channels. Static answered, followed by a soft burst of music. The same three notes. Tomás watched her face. “Go back up. Give your unit the address. Bring people who understand what they’re entering.” “And Rook?” “He’ll be gone.” The honesty of it settled between them. Quinn turned the worn leather strap on her left wrist. The watch
crystal
had cracked when Rook’s knife hand struck the wall. Its second hand still moved. Seven minutes had passed since her last clear contact with Control. Backup would search the high street first. Officers would find her car, then the alley. They might find the station. They would not find Rook. She took out the cord that had snapped during the struggle. A token hung from it, a flat disc of bone with a hole bored through its centre. Green wax edged the hole. The bone carried no blood, though it had lain against Rook’s skin in the rain. Tomás stopped breathing for a moment. “Where did you get that?” “Him.” “He let you take it.” “He was busy escaping.” “He had a second token ready for the door. He’s not escaping, Quinn. He’s delivering something.” Through the narrowing gap, Rook raised one hand. Not a wave. A count. Five fingers. Four. Quinn looked back up the stairs. Rain tapped against the council
notice
above them. A clean route to her unit, to lights and procedure and a interview room with recording equipment. Rook would leave the Market through another entrance. By morning, the station would contain nothing but damp tiles and a story she could not put in a report. Three fingers. Tomás opened his medical bag. “Your arm needs stitches.” “Later.” “If you cross, you cross as my patient. You found the door by accident. Keep your warrant card out of sight. Do not give your full name.” “Rook already used it.” “Then you have one less thing to protect.” Two. Tomás tore open a dressing and pressed it into her hand. “Do not touch the goods. Do not accept food, drink or help. If someone asks what you need, say stitches.” “And if Rook runs?” “Let him.” Quinn pressed the dressing against her arm. She held Tomás’s gaze while blood spread through the gauze. One finger. She pushed her bone token against the brass plate. Cold shot through her palm. The plate clicked, and the door swung open so hard that Tomás had to catch its edge. Rook smiled from beneath the green lamp. Quinn crossed the threshold. Tomás said something in Spanish, took a second bone token from his bag and followed her. The door shut behind them. A staircase led to an abandoned platform. Soot darkened the curved tiles, and torn adverts still clung to the walls. Stalls filled the old track bed. Others stood between the columns, their counters built from tea chests, instrument cases and doors laid across trestles. Blue flames burned inside stoppered jars. A woman in a paper crown threaded teeth onto copper wire. Beside her, a chemist weighed crimson ampoules on brass scales. Each bottle bore a handwritten warning and a hospital batch number.
Further along, a gramophone played
a man’s voice. He recited addresses while his customers wrote them down. Quinn heard two streets she recognised. Both belonged to people under police protection. She put her warrant card deeper into her coat. The smells reached her next. Aniseed. Hot copper. The mineral stink of a flooded cellar. Something sweet turned beneath it all, like fruit rotting inside a wall. Rook walked between the stalls. He had stopped fleeing altogether. Quinn went after him. Tomás stayed at her shoulder and steered her around a coil of rope that lifted its end as her shadow crossed it. “Left.” “He’s straight ahead.” “Then walk straight. Do not step on the white tiles.” Quinn looked down. Several tiles carried hairline cracks. The cracks formed letters, though she could not read them without slowing. A stall holder looked up from a tray of glass eyes. “Tommy. Your patient’s leaking.” “Send me the bill.” “I sent you three.” “Then check under your bad intentions.” A few people laughed. Quinn did not. Rook had reached the far end of the platform, where a circular space opened beneath a dead station clock. No stalls stood there. The bricks around it had
been scrubbed
clean. The token in Quinn’s pocket grew hot. She pulled it out. A black line ran through the bone. It had not been there on the stairs. The line split, forming a second mark, then a third. Tomás caught her wrist. “Drop it.” Quinn opened her hand. The token struck a white tile. Every note of music stopped. Rook turned beneath the clock. For the first time since Camden High Street, he stood still and faced her. “Detective Harlow Quinn,” he called. “You can put away the cuffs.” She kept walking. Tomás spoke behind her. “That wasn’t an invitation.” “What was it?” “A delivery tag.” Rook pointed at her. “Delivered,” he said. “Same terms as Morris.” Locks turned inside the platform walls. Panels slid open where Quinn had seen only tiled arches. Men and women stepped out in dark railway porters’ coats. Their faces
were covered
by smooth paper masks. Each carried a length of fine chain and a black hood folded over one arm. The last porter held a collar. Quinn’s name had
been stitched
into it. She drew her handcuffs and went straight for Rook. Tomás caught her around the waist and hauled her backwards. A scalpel flashed in his other hand. “Green lamp,” he said. “Run when I move.” Rook
began to
applaud. The first porter swung his chain. Tomás shoved Quinn aside and raised his arm, but the links whipped around his wrist, then his throat. The porter hauled Tomás off his feet.
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10/27/2026, 11:17:29 AM
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"moonshotai/kimi-k3.1-pro-20261023"
provider_name
"Moonshot AI"
status
200
total_cost
0.205256
cache_discount
(null)
upstream_inference_cost
0
provider_name
"Moonshot AI"
response_cache_source_id
(null)
data_region
"global"
workspace_id
"97e315e5-d303-487d-83c1-83180e8a13d4"
Evaluation details
Result
Evaluator
Details
Meta Data
100.00%
Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags
5
adverbTagCount
0
adverbTags
(empty)
dialogueSentences
56
tagDensity
0.089
leniency
0.179
rawRatio
0
effectiveRatio
0
100.00%
AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount
1959
totalAiIsmAdverbs
0
found
(empty)
highlights
(empty)
100.00%
AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (17 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
100.00%
AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
(empty)
found
(empty)
92.34%
AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount
1959
totalAiIsms
3
found
0
word
"pulsed"
count
1
1
word
"flickered"
count
1
2
word
"crystal"
count
1
highlights
0
"pulsed"
1
"flickered"
2
"crystal"
100.00%
Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches
0
maxInWindow
0
found
(empty)
highlights
(empty)
100.00%
Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells
0
narrationSentences
202
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount
2
hedgeCount
2
narrationSentences
202
filterMatches
0
"notice"
hedgeMatches
0
"began to"
100.00%
Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences
254
gibberishSentences
0
adjustedGibberishSentences
0
longSentenceCount
0
runOnParagraphCount
0
giantParagraphCount
0
wordSaladCount
0
repetitionLoopCount
0
controlTokenCount
0
repeatedSegmentCount
0
maxSentenceWordsSeen
27
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans
0
markdownWords
0
totalWords
1959
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions
8
unquotedAttributions
0
matches
(empty)
66.67%
Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions
87
wordCount
1609
uniqueNames
17
maxNameDensity
1.62
worstName
"Rook"
maxWindowNameDensity
3
worstWindowName
"Quinn"
discoveredNames
Quinn
25
Camden
4
High
2
Street
2
Rook
26
Raven
1
Nest
1
Silas
2
Underground
1
Herrera
1
Saint
1
Christopher
1
Tomás
16
Control
1
Market
1
Spanish
1
Locks
1
persons
0
"Quinn"
1
"Rook"
2
"Nest"
3
"Silas"
4
"Herrera"
5
"Saint"
6
"Christopher"
7
"Tomás"
8
"Locks"
places
0
"Camden"
1
"High"
2
"Street"
3
"Raven"
globalScore
0.692
windowScore
0.667
100.00%
Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences
131
glossingSentenceCount
1
matches
0
"felt like hiding places"
100.00%
"Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches
0
per1kWords
0
wordCount
1959
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount
0
totalSentences
254
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs
144
mean
13.6
std
14.16
cv
1.041
sampleLengths
0
31
1
17
2
10
3
42
4
2
5
2
6
36
7
47
8
7
9
24
10
5
11
4
12
6
13
3
14
8
15
44
16
10
17
33
18
7
19
43
20
7
21
42
22
5
23
5
24
3
25
7
26
3
27
3
28
51
29
30
30
47
31
4
32
43
33
3
34
15
35
36
36
26
37
7
38
6
39
4
40
49
41
2
42
2
43
7
44
28
45
11
46
25
47
5
48
6
49
10
100.00%
Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount
3
totalSentences
202
matches
0
"been scrubbed"
1
"were covered"
2
"been stitched"
100.00%
Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount
2
totalVerbs
279
matches
0
"was sprinting"
1
"was waiting"
100.00%
Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount
0
semicolonCount
0
flaggedSentences
0
totalSentences
254
ratio
0
matches
(empty)
94.00%
Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount
1514
adjectiveStacks
1
stackExamples
0
"sweet turned beneath it"
adverbCount
29
adverbRatio
0.01915455746367239
lyAdverbCount
6
lyAdverbRatio
0.003963011889035667
100.00%
Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences
254
echoCount
0
echoWords
(empty)
100.00%
Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences
254
mean
7.71
std
4.85
cv
0.629
sampleLengths
0
13
1
6
2
12
3
3
4
14
5
10
6
7
7
13
8
5
9
17
10
2
11
2
12
7
13
10
14
8
15
11
16
16
17
20
18
11
19
7
20
24
21
5
22
4
23
6
24
3
25
4
26
4
27
8
28
8
29
16
30
7
31
5
32
10
33
14
34
5
35
5
36
9
37
7
38
6
39
8
40
10
41
8
42
11
43
7
44
7
45
15
46
5
47
15
48
5
49
5
58.79%
Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats
9
diversityRatio
0.37401574803149606
totalSentences
254
uniqueOpeners
95
36.04%
Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount
2
totalSentences
185
matches
0
"Then came music."
1
"Further along, a gramophone played"
ratio
0.011
100.00%
Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount
44
totalSentences
185
matches
0
"She caught the cord at"
1
"He twisted free."
2
"He knocked a man sideways,"
3
"She caught his handlebar, turned"
4
"Her ribs pulsed where Rook"
5
"She lifted her radio without"
6
"They looked behind them, collided"
7
"He had planned this route."
8
"He swept a stack of"
9
"She planted one foot on"
10
"Her other boot landed badly."
11
"She stumbled, caught a shop"
12
"He shoved a wheelie bin"
13
"She struck it with her"
14
"He was waiting on the"
15
"It scored her left forearm."
16
"She drove her knee into"
17
"He headbutted her."
18
"Her hold loosened for an"
19
"She wiped it against her"
ratio
0.238
32.97%
Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount
158
totalSentences
185
matches
0
"Rook’s shoulder slammed into Quinn’s"
1
"The handcuffs flew from her"
2
"She caught the cord at"
3
"He twisted free."
4
"Quinn shoved the broken cord"
5
"Rain glazed the road beneath"
6
"Night buses hissed through standing"
7
"Rook drove straight through them."
8
"He knocked a man sideways,"
9
"A delivery cyclist wobbled across"
10
"She caught his handlebar, turned"
11
"Her ribs pulsed where Rook"
12
"Water ran from her cropped"
13
"The tail from the Raven’s"
14
"She lifted her radio without"
15
"Static chewed through the reply."
16
"Rook glanced back."
17
"Quinn had seen enough men"
18
"They looked behind them, collided"
19
"Rook ran with an economy"
ratio
0.854
81.08%
Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount
3
totalSentences
185
matches
0
"By the time she had"
1
"Now his grey coat flickered"
2
"To check the distance."
ratio
0.016
100.00%
Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences
63
technicalSentenceCount
1
matches
0
"Tomás stayed at her shoulder and steered her around a coil of rope that lifted its end as her shadow crossed it."
100.00%
Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags
5
uselessAdditionCount
0
matches
(empty)
100.00%
Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags
4
fancyCount
0
fancyTags
(empty)
dialogueSentences
56
tagDensity
0.071
leniency
0.143
rawRatio
0
effectiveRatio
0
92.0631%