Run: 2026-03-09-01KKAC3DDN7FVE5F3T6337RPC2

Run Details

Duration:
1m 59s
Cost:
$0.066355
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4413" name="Silas Blackwood" aliases="Silas, Si, the Spymaster" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Mentor"> <eyeColor>hazel</eyeColor> <hair>grey-streaked auburn</hair> <height>6'1"</height> <age>58</age> <beard>neatly trimmed, matching his grey-streaked auburn hair</beard> <limp>slight limp in his left leg from an old knee injury</limp> <signetRing>silver signet ring, always worn on his right hand</signetRing> <description>Silas is a retired intelligence operative turned bar owner. He carries himself with quiet authority.</description> <backstory>Former MI6 field agent who retired after a botched operation in Prague left him with a permanent knee injury. He opened "The Raven's Nest" bar in Soho as a front for his network of contacts.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the literary fiction genre. Two old friends who haven't seen each other in years run into each other unexpectedly at a bar. One of them has changed significantly. Through their conversation and the tension between who they were and who they've become, reveal the weight of time and unspoken regret. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
By half past nine the dinner rush had broken and bled out into Soho, leaving Rory with the kind of tiredness that felt grainy behind the eyes. She came in through the side door of the Raven’s Nest with the smell of rain and engine grease still clinging to her jacket, nudged it shut with her heel, and stood a moment in the dimness while her sight adjusted. The Nest always took a second. Outside, the city flashed itself raw—headlights on wet streets, blue-white phones in people’s hands, neon smeared across puddles. Inside, the light sank low and amber. Old maps papered the walls in crooked frames, their seas gone tobacco-brown with age. Black-and-white photographs watched from between them: soldiers in wool coats, women with hard lipstick and hard eyes, one grainy shot of a bridge she had once asked about and Silas had refused to explain. The green neon sign over the entrance leaked a faint underwater glow through the front windows and turned the bottles behind the bar ghostly around the edges. Silas looked up from polishing a glass as she came in. He stood in his usual place, broad shoulders still square despite the years, his grey-streaked auburn hair combed back from his forehead. Even from across the room she could see the glint of the silver signet ring on his right hand. His limp was more pronounced when he was tired, and tonight he leaned a little more heavily into the polished wood as he set the glass down. “You look done in,” he said. “I am done in,” Rory said, peeling off her helmet and tucking it under one arm. Her black hair had gone limp with drizzle and curled damply at her jaw. “If one more man in Mayfair tells me his dumplings are late as if I steamed them myself, I might commit a felony.” Silas’s mouth twitched. “You studied pre-law. Useful to know the wording of the charge.” “Useful to know what not to say under questioning.” “That too.” She slipped onto a stool near the corner of the bar, her usual place, where she could see both the door and the room without seeming to watch either. Habit now. Maybe London had done that. Maybe Evan had. Maybe she had always been someone who preferred a wall at her back and an exit in sight and had only learned too late what that said about her. Silas set a glass of water in front of her without asking. “Food?” “In a minute.” He nodded and moved away to serve a pair of tourists studying the whisky shelf as if it were a museum exhibit. Rory drank half the water in one go and let herself breathe. The bar was busier than she’d expected for a wet Tuesday. A knot of theatre people in black crowded the far end, talking over one another in exhausted bursts. A couple sat under the framed map of Constantinople with their knees touching under the table, the intimacy of it so casual it hurt to look at. A man in a navy suit drank alone with the fixed concentration of someone trying not to go home yet. The front door opened on a sweep of rain-cooled air and a woman stepped in, pausing beneath the green wash of the sign. She shrugged off a camel coat darkened at the shoulders with water. Her hair, once a wild copper Rory remembered as a permanent halo of static and laughter, was now cut blunt at the jaw, sleek and deliberate. She wore it tucked behind one ear. Gold flashed there. She stood straighter than the girl Rory had known, as if she had learned the cost of taking up less space and refused to pay it anymore. Rory’s hand stopped around her glass. For a second the woman was just another stranger searching the room. Then her gaze crossed the bar and snagged. The pause that followed was small enough nobody else would notice. Rory noticed it like a blow. Eva. It landed in her all at once and out of sequence: a train platform in Cardiff, seventeen and drunk on cheap cider, Eva shouting over the wind that they’d never become those women who went nowhere; the cramped student kitchen with its sticky floor; a text that had read Leave him. Come to London. I mean it. Her own silence afterward, long and ugly, made of shame and the practical business of surviving one day and then the next. Months becoming years. Missed calls. A birthday message she never answered because by then the not-answering had become its own fact, too large to climb over. Eva’s expression shifted through surprise into something harder to read. Not anger, exactly. The caution that comes before it, perhaps. Silas glanced from the door to Rory and took in the whole thing with one of those quick, private assessments that made him, even now, look like a man who had once been paid to know what people were about to do. He dried his hands on a cloth and said, to no one in particular, “Well.” Eva came forward. Up close the changes sharpened. She had always been beautiful in a heedless way, all quick grin and scraped knees and lipstick borrowed from other girls. Now she was controlled, polished almost severe. Cream silk blouse under the coat. A slim watch. A face a little leaner than Rory remembered, the softness gone from it. But there was tiredness there too, threaded fine at the corners of her eyes. “Rory,” she said. No one called her Aurora unless they didn’t know her, or wanted something formal, or wanted distance. Hearing Rory in Eva’s voice hurt worse. “Hi,” Rory said, and hated how small it sounded. Silas, bless him, set another glass on the bar and poured without being asked. “Eva,” he said, as if he had expected her all evening. “You know where things are.” Eva gave him a brief look, grateful or accusing or both. “Still making yourself indispensable, Silas?” “Occupational failing.” She put her coat over the back of the stool beside Rory but did not sit immediately. “I was meeting someone,” she said, glancing toward the room. “He’s late.” Rory almost laughed at the absurdity of the sentence. As if this were normal. As if they had run into each other at a corner shop and not in the bar where Rory now spent most nights, after years of absence thick enough to qualify as abandonment. “I didn’t know you knew this place,” Rory said. Eva looked at her then, fully. “I didn’t. Not until recently.” There it was, lightly said and not light at all. Rory felt heat rise under her skin. “Right.” Eva sat. Silas slid the drink to her. Whisky, neat. He knew people the way other men knew weather. Eva took a sip and winced almost imperceptibly, like someone reacquainting herself with an old medicine. Neither of them spoke for a moment. The room carried on around them. Glasses clinked. Someone laughed too loudly by the fruit machine. A draught worried the edge of a map near the door. “You cut your hair,” Rory said finally, and the instant it was out she wanted to take it back. It sounded trivial, a bad first move. Eva touched the ends with two fingers. “A while ago.” “It suits you.” “Thanks.” Silence again. Rory traced the condensation ring under her glass. The small crescent scar on her left wrist caught the light when she moved, white against her skin. Eva’s eyes dropped to it and lingered. She used to know that scar’s story by heart—seven years old, climbing the wall behind the school, broken bottle hidden in the ivy, Jennifer Carter pale with fright in A&E. They had once known each other by such useless, intimate details. “You look different,” Eva said. “So do you.” “I know.” It was not vanity. It was fact. Rory looked at her properly, trying to map the woman onto the girl she remembered. The girl had spoken with her whole body, hands everywhere, shoulders loose, face open. This Eva sat still. She seemed to measure each movement before she made it. “You moved to London,” Eva said. “That part I knew.” “Did you?” “I was the one who told you to.” Rory looked away. The whisky sat amber and unwavering in Eva’s glass. She turned it once between her palms. “I kept expecting you to call after you got here. You didn’t. I thought maybe you needed time.” Her voice remained even, but Rory could hear the effort in it now, the way control can become its own kind of tremor. “Then I thought perhaps you were embarrassed. Then I thought perhaps you were dead.” Rory shut her eyes for a beat. “I’m sorry,” she said. Eva let out a short breath through her nose. Not quite a laugh. “That’s such a small sentence for such a long time.” “I know.” “Do you?” Rory turned toward her. “Yes.” Something flickered in Eva’s face then, some old hurt startled into the open. “I called hospitals, Rory.” The room seemed to contract around that. Rory felt the words as if they had been dropped one by one into her glass. “I called because I knew what he was like,” Eva said. “And because you vanish when you’re frightened. You always did. You get very calm and then you disappear somewhere inside yourself, and everyone else mistakes it for coping.” She swallowed, her throat working once. “I called your parents. Your mother said you were safe but she wouldn’t tell me where. Then she stopped answering too.” Rory stared at the worn brass rail under the bar. Shame had a texture. It was old wool in the rain. It was cold tea forgotten beside the bed. It was every message she had opened and left unanswered because the reply required a version of herself she did not know how to inhabit. “Mam was angry,” she said quietly. “With me. With him. With everything. She thought if I told people where I was, he’d find me.” “Would he have?” “No.” Rory lifted a shoulder. “Maybe. I don’t know. At the time everything felt possible in the worst way.” Eva’s gaze rested on her, unwavering. “And after that?” Rory could have lied. Could have said work, money, chaos, depression. All of it true in parts and false in the way truths become false when they are selected carefully. “After that,” she said, “it got harder the longer I left it. Every week made me look worse. Then every month. Then I thought if I called, I’d have to explain why I hadn’t. And I didn’t have a reason that wasn’t ugly.” “What was the ugly reason?” Rory rubbed a thumb over the scar on her wrist. “I couldn’t bear being known. Not by anyone who remembered me before.” Eva’s expression changed—not softening, exactly, but shifting out of attack. “Because of him?” “Partly.” Rory gave a small, humorless smile. “Partly because I let him make me ridiculous.” “That’s not—” “It is to me.” She cut herself off and started again. “I know what you’re going to say. That’s how it works, that he was older, that he isolated me, that abuse isn’t a referendum on intelligence. I know all of that. I would say it to anyone else. But at the time I could not stand the thought of you hearing my voice and knowing exactly how far I’d let things go.” Eva looked down into her drink. “You always hated pity.” “I still do.” “What I felt wasn’t pity.” Rory swallowed. “I know that now.” Silas drifted down the bar, collected empty glasses from the couple under Constantinople, and drifted away again. He did not look at them. The restraint was almost gentlemanly. Eva drank. Rory watched the line of her throat, the neat movement of it. She remembered that throat thrown back in laughter in a Cardiff nightclub bathroom while they drew eyeliner on each other with the concentration of surgeons. She remembered Eva sleeping on her floor during exam week, one arm over her face. She remembered the last time they had fought, before the long silence, Eva calling her a coward for staying with Evan after he had shoved her into a kitchen counter hard enough to bruise; Rory screaming back that not everyone was born brave. “Did you marry him?” Rory asked before she could stop herself. Eva blinked. “What?” “The someone you were meeting.” A brief, strange smile touched Eva’s mouth. “No. God, no. He’s a solicitor from chambers. We had a client dinner nearby and he said this place was decent for a nightcap. I came because I was early.” She tilted her head. “You heard solicitor and jumped to marriage. Very former law student of you.” “I jumped to conclusions because I know nothing about your life.” “That makes two of us.” Rory nodded. Fair. Eva turned her glass slowly. “I did get married, though.” The sentence landed with less force than it should have. Perhaps because the evidence of change had already prepared the ground. Rory forced herself to ask, “Did?” “Divorced last year.” Eva said it with flat competence, as if reciting something from a file. “Three years married. Seven together. He liked me when I was easy to orbit. Less when I had my own gravity.” “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be. It was expensive and clarifying.” She looked up. “I’m a family solicitor now, by the way. Since we’re exchanging damage reports.” Rory let out an involuntary huff of laughter. “Of course you are.” “What does that mean?” “It means you always did like telling people exactly what they owed each other.” “I still do.” “I know.” For the first time, they smiled at the same moment. It passed quickly, but it was real. Eva studied her face. “And you? Silas said you work upstairs.” “Above, not upstairs. I live in the flat over the bar.” “You live here?” “Not in the cellar, no.” “Funny.” “I deliver for Golden Empress mostly. Yu-Fei saved me from starvation and bad employment law. Silas supplies tea, unsolicited advice, and occasional existential menace.” From down the bar Silas said, “Only occasional?” Eva glanced toward him, then back at Rory. “You look… harder.” Rory considered objecting, then didn’t. “I am.” “In a good way?” “Useful way.” “That sounds bleak.” “It’s not all bleak.” She looked around the room—the maps, the photographs, the old wood rubbed smooth by strangers’ hands. The Nest had become a kind of harbor for people who did not use that word. “I’m all right here.” Eva followed her gaze. “You trust him?” Silas was polishing another glass, listening to nothing and everything. “Yes,” Rory said. “I do.” Eva nodded slowly, as if filing that away. The man from chambers finally arrived, all apologies and damp cuffs, but he paused when he saw Eva at the bar with Rory and seemed to understand at once that he had walked into an occupied room. Eva stood. “I should go,” she said. The old reflex rose in Rory at once: let it happen, let the moment close, tell yourself later there was nothing to be done. She felt it like a trapdoor shifting beneath her feet. “Eva.” Eva stopped. Rory stood too. Up close she could see the fine mascara smudge at the outer corner of Eva’s left eye where rain or fatigue had won. Human detail. Not the polished stranger from the door, but the woman inside her. “I was a terrible friend,” Rory said. “Not because I was hurt. Because I left you holding the fear of it alone. I know an apology doesn’t repair that. But I’m saying it properly now.” Eva’s face did not soften into absolution. Rory was grateful for that. Easy forgiveness would have insulted them both. After a moment Eva said, “I was angry enough to hope you’d need me again, just so I could refuse.” Rory took that in. “All right.” “And then when I saw you just now I wanted to hug you and slap you, almost equally.” “That also feels fair.” A breath of laughter escaped Eva before she could stop it. Her eyes shone suddenly, and she looked annoyed by the fact. “I hated not knowing if you were alive.” “I know.” “No, I don’t think you do. But perhaps you will.” Rory nodded because there was nothing to defend. Eva glanced at the man waiting by the door, then back to Rory. “I’m in Bloomsbury now. Chambers on Chancery Lane. If you want…” She hesitated, pride and longing crossing each other cleanly in her face. “If you want to try being in touch like adults, you can.” Rory felt something painful and small stir in her chest. Hope, perhaps. Or simply the memory of deserving it. “I do,” she said. Eva took a card from her bag and slid it across the bar. Rory looked at the embossed lettering but not the details. She did not need to yet. The fact of the card was enough. “Don’t leave it six years this time,” Eva said. “I won’t.” Eva held her gaze a beat longer, testing the promise for weight. Then she picked up her coat, gave Silas a nod, and went to the man at the door. He murmured something. She answered without looking back. A moment later the front door opened, letting in a blade of cold air and the green flare of the sign, and then she was gone into the wet London night. Rory remained standing. Silas came over after a decent interval and set a plate in front of her: bread, cheese, pickles, assembled with the brusque kindness he reserved for moments he pretended not to notice. “You need to eat,” he said. Rory sat. Her hands had begun to shake in the aftermath, very slightly. She curled them around the edge of the plate until they steadied. “How much did you know?” she asked. Silas braced one hand on the bar. The signet ring flashed dull silver. “That she’d been in twice before asking if you were here. I said your comings and goings were your own business.” Rory looked up. “Why?” “Because they are.” He considered her for a moment. “And because if someone is to return to a life, they should do it by choice, not ambush.” “She still found me by ambush.” “A flaw in the method.” Despite herself, Rory smiled. Silas nodded toward the card beside her glass. “Will you call?” She looked at it. Eva Morgan, Solicitor. A number. An address. Ordinary things. Dangerous things, in their way. Bridges always were. “Yes,” Rory said after a moment. “Not tonight. But yes.” Silas gave a grunt that passed for approval and moved off to the other end of the bar, his left leg dragging just slightly with the old injury. Rory tore off a piece of bread and chewed without tasting much. Around her the Nest resumed its shape. People ordered drinks. A chair scraped. Rain ticked at the windows. But some pressure in the room had altered, or perhaps in her. Time had not folded neatly; it never did. It had left sediment. Gaps. Things warped by distance and left that way. Yet Eva had stood here in the same dim light and spoken to her as if the line between then and now, though frayed, had not snapped completely. Rory touched the edge of the card with one finger, then laid her hand flat over it, covering the name. Her wrist scar gleamed pale against the wood. Outside, Soho went on glittering in the rain, indifferent as ever. Inside, beneath the maps of vanished borders and impossible routes, she sat with the weight of years and the narrow, frightening possibility that some things lost could still be found if one was willing to go looking.
created_at"2026-03-09T22:39:50.718Z" 3/9/2026, 10:39:50 PM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency2799
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time119152
tokens_prompt867
tokens_completion5108
native_tokens_prompt808
native_tokens_completion4289
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning96
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.066355
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ff5625c-403f-4d7f-b895-58ac7295062c"
id"resp_00602e917745cf380169af4c36ca2c819388bc140307c78d33"
is_byokfalse
latency295
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-20260305"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773095990-6YgUuiVlwn2Q9QI30Ric"
upstream_id"resp_00602e917745cf380169af4c36ca2c819388bc140307c78d33"
total_cost0.066355
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags37
adverbTagCount3
adverbTags
0"Rory said finally [finally]"
1"she said quietly [quietly]"
2"She looked around [around]"
dialogueSentences124
tagDensity0.298
leniency0.597
rawRatio0.081
effectiveRatio0.048
81.99% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3331
totalAiIsmAdverbs12
found
0
adverb"lightly"
count1
1
adverb"very"
count3
2
adverb"carefully"
count1
3
adverb"slowly"
count2
4
adverb"quickly"
count1
5
adverb"suddenly"
count1
6
adverb"slightly"
count2
7
adverb"completely"
count1
highlights
0"lightly"
1"very"
2"carefully"
3"slowly"
4"quickly"
5"suddenly"
6"slightly"
7"completely"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (16 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
0"Blackwood"
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
81.99% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3331
totalAiIsms12
found
0
word"glint"
count1
1
word"silence"
count3
2
word"silk"
count1
3
word"traced"
count1
4
word"unwavering"
count2
5
word"flickered"
count1
6
word"weight"
count2
7
word"aftermath"
count1
highlights
0"glint"
1"silence"
2"silk"
3"traced"
4"unwavering"
5"flickered"
6"weight"
7"aftermath"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells1
narrationSentences240
matches
0"was grateful"
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount0
hedgeCount3
narrationSentences240
filterMatches(empty)
hedgeMatches
0"seemed to"
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences326
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen62
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3327
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions44
unquotedAttributions1
matches
0"She remembered the last time they had fought, before the long silence, Eva calling her a coward for staying with Evan af…"
16.67% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions140
wordCount2459
uniqueNames18
maxNameDensity2.28
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity4.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Soho2
Rory56
Raven1
Nest4
Silas15
London3
Evan2
Tuesday1
Constantinople2
Cardiff2
Eva45
Leave1
Aurora1
Jennifer1
Carter1
Despite1
Morgan1
Solicitor1
persons
0"Rory"
1"Raven"
2"Nest"
3"Silas"
4"Evan"
5"Eva"
6"Jennifer"
7"Carter"
8"Morgan"
places
0"Soho"
1"London"
2"Cardiff"
globalScore0.361
windowScore0.167
100.00% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences156
glossingSentenceCount2
matches
0"as if reciting something from a file"
1"as if filing that away"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches2
per1kWords0.601
wordCount3327
matches
0"not softening, exactly, but shifting out of attack"
1"Not the polished stranger from the door, but the woman inside her"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount4
totalSentences326
matches
0"know that scar’s"
1"remembered that throat"
2"use that word"
3"left that way"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs156
mean21.33
std23.97
cv1.124
sampleLengths
068
1106
279
36
453
514
69
72
868
913
103
1134
1276
1398
146
1537
161
17105
1820
1957
203
2169
223
2324
249
2530
2616
272
2829
2947
309
3111
3210
338
3435
3534
3626
3710
383
391
402
4174
425
433
442
4550
4610
472
488
493
97.95% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount5
totalSentences240
matches
0"been paid"
1"being asked"
2"been dropped"
3"are selected"
4"was gone"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount2
totalVerbs438
matches
0"was polishing"
1"was willing"
81.51% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount4
semicolonCount4
flaggedSentences7
totalSentences326
ratio0.021
matches
0"Outside, the city flashed itself raw—headlights on wet streets, blue-white phones in people’s hands, neon smeared across puddles."
1"It landed in her all at once and out of sequence: a train platform in Cardiff, seventeen and drunk on cheap cider, Eva shouting over the wind that they’d never become those women who went nowhere; the cramped student kitchen with its sticky floor; a text that had read Leave him."
2"She used to know that scar’s story by heart—seven years old, climbing the wall behind the school, broken bottle hidden in the ivy, Jennifer Carter pale with fright in A&E."
3"Eva’s expression changed—not softening, exactly, but shifting out of attack."
4"She remembered the last time they had fought, before the long silence, Eva calling her a coward for staying with Evan after he had shoved her into a kitchen counter hard enough to bruise; Rory screaming back that not everyone was born brave."
5"“It’s not all bleak.” She looked around the room—the maps, the photographs, the old wood rubbed smooth by strangers’ hands."
6"Time had not folded neatly; it never did."
96.09% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount1934
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount86
adverbRatio0.04446742502585315
lyAdverbCount21
lyAdverbRatio0.010858324715615306
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences326
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences326
mean10.21
std9.44
cv0.925
sampleLengths
027
141
26
318
47
514
634
727
811
922
1019
1127
126
1316
1414
1523
163
1711
189
192
2029
212
225
233
2429
2512
261
273
2822
2912
3011
3118
3227
3320
3423
3512
3626
377
383
3927
406
4112
428
4311
446
451
4651
473
483
4922
45.40% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats15
diversityRatio0.294478527607362
totalSentences326
uniqueOpeners96
98.04% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount6
totalSentences204
matches
0"Maybe London had done that."
1"Maybe Evan had."
2"Maybe she had always been"
3"Then her gaze crossed the"
4"Perhaps because the evidence of"
5"Then she picked up her"
ratio0.029
100.00% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount53
totalSentences204
matches
0"She came in through the"
1"He stood in his usual"
2"His limp was more pronounced"
3"Her black hair had gone"
4"She slipped onto a stool"
5"He nodded and moved away"
6"She shrugged off a camel"
7"Her hair, once a wild"
8"She wore it tucked behind"
9"She stood straighter than the"
10"It landed in her all"
11"I mean it."
12"Her own silence afterward, long"
13"He dried his hands on"
14"She had always been beautiful"
15"he said, as if he"
16"She put her coat over"
17"she said, glancing toward the"
18"He knew people the way"
19"It sounded trivial, a bad"
ratio0.26
60.49% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount163
totalSentences204
matches
0"She came in through the"
1"The Nest always took a"
2"The green neon sign over"
3"Silas looked up from polishing"
4"He stood in his usual"
5"His limp was more pronounced"
6"Rory said, peeling off her"
7"Her black hair had gone"
8"Silas’s mouth twitched."
9"She slipped onto a stool"
10"Silas set a glass of"
11"He nodded and moved away"
12"Rory drank half the water"
13"The bar was busier than"
14"A knot of theatre people"
15"A couple sat under the"
16"A man in a navy"
17"The front door opened on"
18"She shrugged off a camel"
19"Her hair, once a wild"
ratio0.799
98.04% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount4
totalSentences204
matches
0"Even from across the room"
1"Now she was controlled, polished"
2"As if this were normal."
3"As if they had run"
ratio0.02
100.00% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences89
technicalSentenceCount4
matches
0"By half past nine the dinner rush had broken and bled out into Soho, leaving Rory with the kind of tiredness that felt grainy behind the eyes."
1"It landed in her all at once and out of sequence: a train platform in Cardiff, seventeen and drunk on cheap cider, Eva shouting over the wind that they’d never …"
2"Silas glanced from the door to Rory and took in the whole thing with one of those quick, private assessments that made him, even now, look like a man who had on…"
3"As if they had run into each other at a corner shop and not in the bar where Rory now spent most nights, after years of absence thick enough to qualify as aband…"
84.46% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags37
uselessAdditionCount3
matches
0"he said, as if he had expected her all evening"
1"She swallowed, her throat working once"
2"Eva said, as if reciting something from a file"
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags28
fancyCount2
fancyTags
0"He dried (dry)"
1"Rory forced (force)"
dialogueSentences124
tagDensity0.226
leniency0.452
rawRatio0.071
effectiveRatio0.032
91.4207%